It’s morning again. Something heavy on your chest. The cat is hungry. You’re hungry. Food is off-putting, though. Those beans from two nights ago were heavy and lead-like on your tongue. Brush your teeth. Read your book. The sun is blandly shining. Nurse the scratches. Class is stuffy. Did you feed the cat? The cat. Your book is heavy, these drugs seem unlikely to be real. Who named these? What’s wrong with your face? Did you have that breakfast? So good. No, yeah, delicious. Empty class, or maybe it isn’t. The noises are drowned out by other noises. That’s not good for your ears, you know? Not much of good in you, anyway. Legs feel like lead and air at the same time. Fresh fruit? Cat food. Lovely. Is it raining? Your shoes are muddy again. You used to be responsible. Smoke a cigarette. Clean your shoes? Lock the door. The sun is in your eyes. Feed the cat. Feed yourself? Read your book. It doesn’t seem to end. Wash your face? Are you there? What are you doing? A walk. A walk. A walk. You should try the fried rice. Okay. Feed the cat. Purring cat. Love the cat. Nurse the scratches. Shove it off. Pull it back. I’m sorry. Did you forget us? I’m sorry. What’s for dinner? You’re lying. You do that alot, don’t you? You lie. You smoke a cigarette. You lie. You lie. You still lie. Feed the cat. Nurse the scratches. Why weren’t you in class? Office. Work. What work? Is it worth it? She said that. I burnt it. A bad person? You never considered it. A bad person. Maybe you are. Bad. Hungry. A roll, maybe? A cigarette, perhaps. You should keep it. Burn it. Crop it. Delete it. Have you heard what she’s been saying? No. Delete it. Ignore it. Make it go away. Feed the cat. Class is stuffy. She’s angry. She should be dead. You should be dead. You did this. To us. To yourself. Nurse the scratches. You? I don’t. Why would I? What made you think? Nurse the scratches. How have you been? What’s for dinner? Lazy to walk back. Don’t worry, I had the tea. Too sweet. Too cold. Too sticky. The doctor. A doctor? The buses are fast, aren’t they? Is that makeup? Red. Feed the cat. You alright? When was your last meal? Oh I’ll eat tonight. Four mouthfuls. Deep breathing. He won’t pick up. Why would he? A bad person, remember? Bad person. Catch your breath, then lose it again as you take a drag. Feed the cat. Lovely. Isn’t she lovely? Do something. He’s perfect, have you seen him? If he didn’t. He won’t. You used to be responsible. Why won’t you? Read your book. Your book? The blue screen, the grey screen, the white screen. Red. Cat food. Lovely. The buses don’t stop, do they? Such a pretty house. Is it raining? What’re you doing? A walk? The terrace is cold. Your hands are cold. Your hands are cold. Are you shaking? No. What’s for dinner? No. A cigarette. Then another. Deep breaths. You used to be responsible. Will you come home? Hello. I gave birth to you. You lie. You lie again. You lie. You lie. They’re stained, you know? You’re welcome. You’re a bad person. Yeah, a bad person. Didn’t you burn it? It was mine to burn. You burnt it? It was mine to destroy. I was not hers to destroy. You did that? Why did you do that to her? She’s nice. You’re just a bad person. Nurse the scratches. No. Never. Get this right. Look at the way she talks to me. I don’t trust you. Feed the cat. You did what? What’s for dinner? Lead and cardboard.
You’re a bad person.
