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I've drawn something or at least acknowledged Komaeda's birthday for almost a decade now.
But I think I dropped the ball this year for a really good reason.
[Health Update under cut. cw: memory loss, dementia, cancer and tumor mention, general medical unpleasantness]
I have so far lacked the energy and capability to think straight enough to type something like this out, but I've talked about this particular throughline of my health on here enough where I'm gonna say something. Due to the nature of all of it though and on account of me being absolutely and reasonably too exhausted to talk about this with sensitivity and high decorum towards the sensibilities of others, not to mention my arms are stinging like hell, so excuse me if I'm blunt or make jokes or just don't seem to be the "correct" amount of miserable given the circumstances. They're my circumstances and I get to choose the movie.
Anyway so here's the gist of my circumstances
Yes I confirmed have symptoms of demenita/have dementia
I'm not giving details on how that happened until we're sure
I don't have Alzeheimer's or nothin', whatever's going on is most likely able to be stopped in progression if not full out reversed.
That said the recent bout has been progressing for a while; for sake of brevity I've had to start carrying a notebook around with caregiver contact information and a brief explanation of "if I'm wandering around confused I am in fact confused and if I should know you assume I don't and if you need me to know something later write it down." inside.
I have in fact just been getting up and leaving in the middle of a conversation or task, or been midsentence in a Discord call or something and stopped talking, slowly felt even the idea that I was in a conversation leave my person, let alone why I am in whatever room I'm in or what that room is more than conceptually.
Sake of brevity sorry that's not brief, but you can see why I'd like to take this moment of lucidity (that I am losing as I type oh no) to not bother editing.
I also have a small tumor in my brain that is I think highkey unrelated and I think that's funny. And also I probably still have a mass in my lungs. And also my spine is broken. And pressing nerves in another area. And the right half of my body currently feels like it was smothered in icyhot/lidocaine.
This all sounds very dramatic and it probably is, but to me it's become "ah yes day ending in y" and when it's been like this for so long it becomes "yeah sure the dementia yeah that may as well happen add it to the pile"
Illness Georg.
Like so maybe I'm not gonna focus on any actual work for a bit like maybe that's unreasonable to ask myself for like maybe I can't remember the past several years and also yesterday and also anything I said a few paragraphs ago. I LITERALLY have to live in an exact second homie, anything before or past that is nonexistant lmao.
I forgot what cookie dough was--I scrolled up to add something and scrolled down and saw that and forgot I typed it and I think that's more interesting than the situation surrounding the extent to which I forgot the concept of spoons for eating.
I have NO IDEA WHERE I'm going with this. I have health problems. There's an Ao3 Author bit in here, this isn't even a full health update or even an accurate skim, I just wanted to say something and also acknowledge "yo didn't you say you'd start streaming again" I do not want to be mid-stream and suddenly go silent and shut the game off with no explanation, that sounds haunting for an audience.
The Jamil on my Tomodachi Life Island is an absolute failboy and I think he should be allowed to do that.
I would not be saying this if my other miis were an equal amount of fail people; no he has a special brand going on here, and it's both entertaining and fascinating. He cannot be within 5 feet of a soda can without there being a mishap. I don't know why that's a throughline. Maybe it's the caffeine.
I had to test my mic set-up, so I recorded this and liked how it sounded.
UNFORTUNATELY I didn't intend to do a full on cover and didn't spend time getting used to the actual, more interesting melody.
I DID draw art though and wanted to share that, and may as well share the audio too, haha. The character is one of those press the hidden button and they collapse type toys, I like those :D.
Why do I imagine komakure sounding like shaggy from the mystery incorporated 2010 series?
Also MATOKO IS SO FREAKING CUTE!
DANGANRONPA FUSION AU MENTION? IN 2026? Blessed, thank you.
I had to go back and watch clips from Mystery Inc. to be reminded of this, I see the vision. Slightly deeper and remove the anxiety, and muah. (This is a raspier Jude 6teen. You know the kind of guy.)
and now I would like to (re?)watch both Mystery Inc. and 6Teen.
ALSO THE MATOKO APPRECIATION IS...APPRECIATED!!
Last post in such quick succession, especially after such long silence, but I gotta say--
When essentially asked "why do you portray Jamil like you do", I sure did write a (knowingly) ridiculously long post mixed with timelines and hunches and theories or whatever, basically based on nothing, just so I could smokescreen a bit and slip in--at a place easy to just scroll over even if you opened the readmore-- the simplest, most direct, most genuine, most accuracy retained two-word answer of
I haven't forgotten it. It's not even on the backburner. It's my most active project, it is my baby, and no changes to it have been made in any way due to any factors from other media existing or me playing in them.
If anything, I am staunch that it was here first and won't change anything due to the singular reason of other media similarity.
I have been working on it for over a decade, it has roots buried deep in a decade and a half. 15 years.
I am not going to keep my cake to myself just because a similar one made it to the table quicker. Everyone should get to eat.
It's just matured and I'm not doing it alone anymore. I'm excited to share the world with you, and all of the people in it.
The boys can't be back because they never left.
I can't wait for you to meet them, again and for the first time 🩵
A friend sent me these little guys a couple weeks ago, and I'm forever grateful.
HOWEVER...Maman asked me, full genuine,
"Why did your friend send you dolls of Michael Jackson and Paul McCartney?"
She has referred to Jamil as Michael Jackson since first sight. So I understood that one. Had to have a White friend explain Paul McCartney after she couldn't (I don't have what he looks like on mental tap and Maman could only point me towards a song MJ and him did together...after he was older.). I understood after White friends showed me younger Paul McCartney. But that was a separate day.
THIS day, after unpacking them, Maman said to put them on the Christmas Tree. It is well into January. I cannot resist a bit. So. Within 30 seconds
She is absolutely delighted at this. She says to at least leave them up until her husband comes home, because he'd really like to see them. He comes home from a long day of work, and finds me, and says;
"I saw the guys you put on the tree! I love them! Please don't take them down, you can't take them from their home!!"
So they live there now. It's already January 28th. We can't take the tree down, that would be removing them from their home. We have talked about removing the surrounding decorations but the tree has to stay.
I started this during a personal fast at the end of last year, wanted it done by Ramadan, then by Eid al-Fitr, and then I forgot about it, and then it was Eid al-Fitr, so I called it.
"She's young, but a brilliant sleuth nonetheless. Though she tends to rely on her physical prowess and Trainer skills over deductive reasoning to solve cases. Her showdown with the art thieves who tried to rob the Lumiose Museum is still a hot topic!"
I lost the whole project file for this, and considering how much I went through just for this much I don’t think I'm going to try again any time soon. At least not with the music part.
I've decided the framing of these videos is that I'm an older cousin (blood or otherwise) who happens to also go here, which means I get to inflict someone else with those specific vibes.
Every aspect of this wip needs to be redone (recording, sfx, roughs etc etc) but I'm still happy enough to have stuff I have to throw out than nothing.
