such a weird time to be both an army and an engene cause fym one of my ult group is being torn apart and my other ult group performed together as a whole for the first time in 4 years... this is actually so emotionally exhausting, anyone else on the same boat?
Would anyone be interested in a Jake fic where he’s a storm chaser and y/n is a meteorologist??? If you’ve seen the twisters movie that’s kind of the vibe^^ (ik I’m on hiatus but maybe big comeback??)
if heeseung truly chose this for himself, then i will be there to support him 100%. if he did not choose this for himself, then i will fight for him 100%.
yes, we are in an emotional time, and a lot of things don’t make sense regarding his departure. but we can’t pretend we know everything going on in the hybe building, between heeseung and the company, or even heeseung and the members.
if this is what heeseung wants, then i support it.
Hello everyone! This is something I’ve been giving some thought for the past few months so hear my out as I spew my thoughts.
Now this doesn’t really have anything to do with heeseung. I have my own thoughts and opinions about the situation that I haven’t shared. This is something I’m sure none of us saw coming and everyone is going to navigate though it in a different way. That being said the situation at hand has just solidified some thoughts I’ve been having for awhile now.
I’m sure hardly anyone would actually read all of this. Yall know I’m not one to start drama or anything so please don’t take it that way. Nothing said here is targeted with any single person in mind. I’ve been an engene since debut and have been deep in this fandom on TikTok, Twitter, tumblr, insta the whole shebang.
Personally I just haven’t had a lot of creative energy lately. I’ve been battling some mental health and self esteem issues, I’ve been trying to date again(not going well) as well as taking on a lot of new responsibility at my job. I just haven’t really had it in me to write. I’ve started a lot of projects but haven’t had the energy to finish them.
But the biggest reason has to be the noise from the fandom. I joined tumblr not just to purely share my writing but to find a community. I’ve shared this before and ever since I was a kid I was bullied and had a hard time making friends. I couldn’t understand why, sure I fuck up, I say shit that I probably shouldn’t. My adhd slips out and I interrupt people an change the subject without meaning to. Regardless I’m a very empathetic person and I try so so hard to be kind. The world is already full of so much jealousy, hate, and attitude. The last thing I want to do is be the reason someone is feeling the way I feel.
I’m an adult so I know you’re not going to click with everyone. But not just on tumblr but other platforms im active in as well I’ve noticed engenes are so cliquey. I know a lot of it isn’t on purpose. People who’ve known eachother longer just stick together. I get that. I’ve been writing for nearly a year now and it just feels like im always trying to squeeze myself into a community where I’m not wanted. I can’t lie and say that I don’t feel jealous when I see other creators always having a hype man, having inbox support and all. I know fic writing isn’t about numbers and external validation but I’m only human and the comparison is hard to avoid.
I feel like comparing myself to bigger, better writers has killed my creativity. I can’t help but ask what they have that I don’t. I feel like my fic ideas just aren’t very good, my writing has a lot of mistakes. I’m probably being overly critical but I feel like nothing I’ve written has really made an impact. I’m convinced that I could delete this blog and no one would even notice. I’m sure that’s probably the depression talking which is why I’ve decided just to step away for a minute.
Enhablr and the enhypen community as a whole had had more than its fair share of drama. Over the past little bit so many of the people who I did connect with ended up stepping away and so maybe it’s just time for me to. Fandoms shouldn’t have hierarchy and I hate that in all platforms, this one does.
Enhypen is 7. I love them with all my heart and I will support them in my own way. This isn’t goodbye forever I just need to get my head in the right space. I know this is crazy coming from a fic writer myself but from an outside perspective some of what I’ve seen across TikTok, Twitter, X and ig is just a step too far in the parasocial direction. Constantly surrounding myself with that isn’t good either.
Another random thing is especially in the last week I’ve seen a mob/cult mentality that I didn’t know we were capable of. That being said Fuck Belift, ENHYPEN IS 7!!! But I also can only do so much, I can’t let this consume every aspect of my life you know?
I hope heeseung comes back but regardless of the outcome I hope he ends up where he truly wants to be. It doesn’t matter if that’s back with the boys or on his own I’ll support what he truly wants for himself.
To all the people who have supported me this far, thank you. I hope to come back when I’m in a better spot. I’m still going to write, probably original work or fics for other fandoms. In the meantime I’m going to keep a03 & Wattpad as my focus. I’ll link them at the bottom so we can keep up!
I would also be okay giving out my discord or x if anyone wants to stay in touch. I’ll still check in here every now and then but for the meantime I think I should take this step.
hey guys, a friend of mine just got scammed and essentially got her acc stolen. she’s been very anxious and she doesn’t want anyone else to get implicated because of this situation.
both her and i would really appreciate it if you guys could share this post so it can hopefully reaches more eyes.
Hi everyone, this is Nat! I'm sorry that I had to come to everyone this way, but there are truly horrible people on this planet 😀 I won't go into much detail, but the fact is: I do not have access to the blog @thatfeelinwhenyou anymore. The account has been compromised. In the last moments when I was still logged in, the stranger started using my account to message a bunch of people, likely trying to scam you. Please do NOT interact with the account. It is no longer me. I'm trying my best to get this sorted out and I hope that is soon. I do wish to apologise for any inconvenience caused, and I'm also sorry if this was not the news you guys would've wanted to hear from me 😔 Love y'all and trust I'm coming back regardless ❤️
You knew Sunghoon was trouble, and you knew this holiday was a joke. Yet here you are, falling back into his bed like you still belong there.
pairing: park sunghoon x fem!reader
genre: smut, exes to lovers
This content is only for readers 18+
word count: 3.4K
content warning: strong language, explicit sexual content, exes-to-lovers, unprotected sex (creampie), oral sex(f recieving), praise, name-calling, soft missionary sex with pillow talk.
soundtrack: sugar talking - sabrina carpenter
✩⸻[ 𝐂atalogue. ]
kate's note: Thank you to @dollhoonki and @kissued for hosting this event!! This was such a fun prompt and it really helped me get out of my writers block. (This is like a week late but i hope you enjoy!)
Who even likes Valentine’s Day?
The overcrowded restaurants, the annoying Instagram posts, and the PDA alone was enough to make you gag.
It wasn’t a big deal for you, never was. You saw Valentine's Day for exactly what it was. A way to keep sales up after Christmas. More useless shit to buy, limited edition candy that no one really even wants.
All your friends had plans, of course. Being the only single one had its perks, but this weekend wasn’t one of them.
On the bright side, your rose was charged, your new favorite show played on your iPad as you started to order takeout on your phone.
Just as you were entering your card info, a text popped up at the top of your screen.
Your ex.
Sunghoon Park:
Hey, I know it’s been a while, and you probably
don’t want to hear from me today of all days, but
maybe give me a call? If you’re not busy tonight, of course.
Your fingers hovered over the text, heart racing as your face heated up from frustration or excitement. It was hard to tell.
That corny motherfucker.
Things with Sunghoon have always been complicated—for lack of better words. But time and time again, he proves—
He always ends up coming back.
You knew he couldn’t resist you. Like clockwork, he always ended up back on his knees, his eyes glassy as he begged you for forgiveness.
And God would that be a sight to see tonight.
You weren't even thinking straight as you opened up your contacts, fingertips hovering over the green circle before you pressed it.
The phone rang against your ear, the pause between sounds making your heart nearly stop beating.
“Hello?” Sunghoon’s rough voice echoed through the line.
“You texted?” You shuddered, feeling a chill of anticipation go down your spine.
“Are you with someone right now?” Sunghoon asked, his voice so heavy you could practically feel it through the phone.
“Not currently, no,” you replied. Biting your lip at the thought of what was to come next.
“Fuck, I can’t believe I’m asking you this,” Sunghoon groaned, his voice deep and low between shallow breaths.
You bit back a weak laugh, predictable, so fucking predictable. You glanced at your nightstand, making note of the time. He obviously was about to ask you to hook up, and it wouldn’t be the first time—
“Would you join me for dinner?”
Dinner?
You let out that awkward chuckle you were holding, the grip on your phone loosening as you ran the words through your mind again and again.
Dinner.
“Sunghoon do you have any idea what time it is right now?” you replied. Running a hand down your face in disbelief that he would ask you a question like that while you were already tucked in bed wearing your pajamas.
“I know fuck, I know. But just hear me out,” He stuttered.
“It’s nothing fancy, I promise. It doesn’t matter what you're wearing I—I just want to see you,” Sunghoon whispered, his voice cracking weakly under pressure.
“Let me guess, this stupid holiday is making you remember what you lost, right?” you snapped back. Heart still pounding heavy in your ears. Your chest felt heavy, and you couldn’t figure out if it was because of frustration or something different.
Sunghoon let out a deep sigh, and a faint moan slipped past his lips before he interrupted.
“You haven't eaten since the morning, haven't you?”
You scoffed, feeling the heat burning behind your cheeks at his words, the tenderness of his tone making your stomach flip—
“Gotcha,” Sunghoon whispered, making you choke on the witty reply stringing together behind your throat.
“How did you—Sunghoon I—”
“I made something, it's a little burned at the edges, but it might beat that takeout you were probably planning on ordering,” Sunghoon informed warmly.
Your heart teetered on the edge of wanting to scream, but curiosity put up a stronger fight.
“Please?" Sunghoon whispered, his voice so soft you could barely hear it through the line.
The seconds after that were long and heavy as you mentally thought of all the reasons this was a more than terrible idea. You hated that you were stuck in this loop, and maybe getting out wasn’t even what you wanted.
But before you could even fully process the pros and cons, you were replying…
“I’m on my way.”
+++
You still knew the way to his apartment, no directions needed. The backroads you took were comforting in a way, so many memories of joy and pain lingered.
Without hesitation, you knocked on the door; the silence following was almost enough to make you sprint down the hall back towards the parking garage.
It wasn’t long before the door opened with a soft click. The woody smell of Sunghoon’s faint cologne filled your senses as he stood in front of you, looking even better than you remembered.
“You actually came?” Sunghoon replied with a sigh of relief. His eyes raked up and down your figure as he held the door open for you. The scent of his apartment was nostalgic as you walked through the door.
With a snarky reply, you shot back—
“What? Did you think I was messing with you?”
Sunghoon nervously laughed at your response. His eyes locked on yours as he pulled the dish towel off his shoulder to wipe his hands. Like second nature, you followed him into the kitchen. The warm aromas are already filling the space.
“Listen, I know we have our—issues, but if there's anything I know for a fact, it's that you aren’t stupid,” Sunghoon stated, turning his back as he grabbed a wooden spoon to stir the large pot on the stovetop.
You scoffed, trying to hide your smirk as you noticed the way his white button-up shirt hugged the muscles of his back. The perfect curve and dip of his waist—
“Is that supposed to be a compliment?” You shot back.
“Oh, don’t tell me you like the romantic shit now,” Sunghoon replied as he brought the spoon to his lips, cooling it down with his breath before having a taste.
You noticed the way his brows furrowed before he leaned to reach into his spice cabinet.
“Cooking dinner in a white button-up and slacks is like the textbook example of romantic,” You smiled, watching as he continued to cook in front of you. Wiping the sweat from his brow as he finished decorating two glass plates.
“On Valentine's day of all fucking days,” you added. Closing the small distance between you, your hand gently resting on his shoulder as he turned to meet your gaze.
“It’s so romantic, totally gross. Sickening.” You replied sarcastically, smiling as you caught another whiff of Sunghoon's masculine perfume. The same scent that still happens to drive you crazy.
"You and your fucking humor—" Sunghoon laughed breathlessly as he turned his head to hide the massive smile he was holding back.
You watched the way the muscles of his back strained against that thin white shirt as he picked up two glass plates. A homemade pasta dish topped with fresh basil and parsley. The aroma that filled his small kitchen apartment was strangely homey and warm.
You followed him to the dinner table, the familiar decor bringing back memories—good and bad.
You fought on that couch, slammed that bedroom door more times than you could count.
Sunghoon set down the plates, awkwardly pulling out a chair and offering it to you with a soft flush across his cheeks.
You smiled weakly, fighting the urge to bite back at the kind gesture with a snarky remark.
With soft eyes, Sunghoon watched as you picked up your fork, twirling the silverware between your fingertips as you actively avoided his gaze.
"So how come you don't have a date tonight?" Sunghoon asked, clearing his throat like that was enough to kill the tension in the room.
Rapidly, your heart started beating faster as you thought of your answer. Why didn't you have a date? That question didn't even have an answer.
Was it because you were too busy to find someone? Or maybe you just couldn't get Sunghoon out of your mind long enough to look at your other options.
Deep down, you knew you didn't want them.
Not when Sunghoon knew you so well. He knows your silly little habits, he knows how easy it is to get wrapped up in work and forget about what's important.
"I—I don't really know. Guess I was just too busy with work." You replied with a nonchalant nod of acknowledgment.
Sunghoon hummed in reply, taking a bite off his own plate before he clasped his hands together in front of him on the table.
"Too busy to get laid?" Sunghoon asked with a dangerous smile and a raised eyebrow.
You let out a nervous laugh before stuffing your mouth with a bite of his food. Your eyes watered, but it was the only way to stop yourself from saying something beyond stupid.
"You know, Sunghoon, I'm shocked you didn't ask me to hook up twenty minutes ago when I came through that door." With a sharp laugh, you replied.
"Do you want to...hook up?" Sunghoon asked, his voice dropping an octave as his gaze met yours.
"Sunghoon..." You whispered as you violently tore away your gaze. He could tell you were already fighting it. Even though you were trying to hide the fact that deep down you were hoping he'd ask you that before you left for the night.
"Or not..." Sunghoon replied as he gently threw his arms up in surrender.
The silence between you was heavy as the seconds ticked by like minutes.
Your mind was racing, fighting your heart as you held back a devastating "yes."
"Park Sunghoon." You chuckled; the click of your silverware hitting the glass plate was enough to make him jump.
"You are so fucking predictable."
Sunghoon let out a huff of disbelief, like he almost wanted to be hurt by your words.
The dinner was long forgotten as he leaned over the table, nearly knocking over one of the fake candle decorations he had set out for this.
“If there's anything I know about you—” Sunghoon whispered, raising a brow before he continued.
“It’s that you fucking love predictable.”
His words hit you hard.
Your body was closing the distance before your mind screamed at you to stop.
“I’m what?” You spat out nearly chest to chest with him now. With a step forward, you cut off his balance, causing him to stumble and catch himself with his palms gripping the edge of the table.
“Don’t play dumb, trust me, I know you’re smarter than that,” Sunghoon replied with a knowing glint in his eyes.
You opened your mouth to speak, curses getting stuck heavy in your throat. The strength to let them free faltered when his gaze softened.
And then his eyes dropped to your lips.
Fuck.
You tried to hide the smirk tugging helplessly at your lips as you replied.
“Trust me. I know I’m smart.”
The tension between you was enough to bring down the building. Sunghoon held your gaze as his large hands softly cupped the sides of your face.
You weren't sure who leaned in first.
Your heart pounded as your lips met his. Soft, sweet, and a tenderness that you couldn’t replace.
His fingertips left your face to slide down your body, finding your lower back as he pulled you in close.
Your lips moved in harmony with his, gasps of pleasure and want fell helplessly as your fingertips tangled weakly in his dark hair.
Sunghoon pulled away, breath heavy against your lips as his heart pounded hard against his chest.
He couldn't help but pull you in closer until your chest was pressed tightly against his own.
His touch was gentle as he lifted a hand, softly brushing your hair behind your ear as he glanced down at you, his eyes flickering with something deeper than lust.
“You taste just as good as I remember–” Sunghoon whispered before he took the very breath from your lungs.
This time, when his lips met yours, it was hungry, desperate. You couldn’t tell if it was an insult or an apology, if that even mattered.
“Sunghoon, fuck…” You moaned against his lips, your hands roaming his body with no shame as your fingertips slipped beneath the cotton hem of his shirt.
Sunghoon moaned at your touch, his lips still brushing against your own as he struggled to catch his breath. Your touch only making the task harder.
"Fuck...Yeah. Fuck." Sunghoon panted with a weak smirk.
Sunghoon leaned in, closing the millimeters of distance between your lips. A deep moan got caught in his throat as you matched his fervor.
"Can we?" Sunghoon whispered between hot kisses, his breath wet against your neck as he kissed the skin beneath your jaw.
"Can we what?" You asked weakly, mentally punching yourself for how needy the question sounded as it left your lips.
"Can we fuck?" He whispered, his words barely loud enough to hear.
You hated how fast you whispered yes.
Sunghoon's hands moved with intention as he undressed you like so many times before. His fingertips lingered on your soft skin as he unclasped your bra before sliding the straps down your shoulders.
His sheets were cool against the warmth of your skin. His cologne lingered on the pillows as you sank into them.
"You look like you belong here," Sunghoon whispered as his lips dragged across your collarbone. His own shirt was discarded helplessly on the ground with yours.
You let out a breathless moan as you noticed the perfect, familiar lines and curves of his shoulders and biceps.
"Do I now?" You replied, sounding more helpless than snarky as his fingertips hooked between your pants and skin before he pushed the fabric down your hips.
"Mhm... can't wait to see you." Sunghoon moaned, his hands working with urgency as he pulled your panties down your thighs.
His hands pinned your thighs to the bed as you shivered, already dripping where you needed him most.
Sunghoon knew exactly what you wanted. There was no need for further conversation.
He dipped his head between your thighs, spreading them wide as his broad shoulders settled between them,
Sunghoon's mouth found your cunt, his tongue slipping between your folds to get a taste of what you had to offer.
You sat up on your elbows to watch as he dived in, his tongue working slowly and toughly just how you liked it.
His eyes fluttered shut with a groan as his hands slipped from your thighs to your ass. Sunghoon gripped you tighter, pulling your cunt into his face as he ate you out like he was starving for it.
Pleasure shot through your body from the skilled nature of his tongue. It was embarrassing how fast the heat was winding in your stomach.
"Fuck you taste so sweet." Sunghoon groaned, his words barely audible between the wet noises of his mouth on your cunt and the heavy breathing from your lips.
He lapped up the mess you were making on his tongue. As his hands slid back down to your thighs.
You were close, he could feel it in the way your toes curled, and your thighs shook against his shoulders.
Sunghoon moaned as he pulled away, your slick dripping down his chin as he licked his lips with a pleasured hum.
"Wanna come inside you...like how we used to do it," Sunghoon whispered against your thigh. He left a soft kiss on the skin there before he climbed back over you.
Your chest was still heaving as you nodded, your hands slipping between your bodies until you found the cold zipper of his pants.
Sunghoon moaned as you pulled it down while looking into his eyes. You didn't even notice you were biting your lips as your knuckles brushed across the bulge tucked behind.
His eyes stayed locked on yours as your hands slid to his waist, pushing his slacks over his hips and letting his cock spring against his stomach.
Sunghoon leaned in and kissed you, his skin already slick from sweat as your hands wrapped around his cock, feeling the ridges and sensitive spots you knew all too well.
"Fuck you feel too good," Sunghoon whispered breathlessly as he gripped the sheets on either side of your head. His muscles strained as he fought his hips from bucking up into your hand.
"Are you ready?" You whispered, pulling away just enough to catch his reaction.
"Never been more ready," Sunghoon replied, slipping his knee between your thighs to open up your legs.
You gasped as his cock brushed between your folds. Sunghoon coated himself in your slick with a groan before he slipped inside your hole.
The two of you moaned in sync as the thick head of his cock punctured your wet entrance. The stretch was even better than you remember.
Your back arched off the mattress as he fully slipped inside with a rough groan. His sweaty forehead dropped to your own as he panted for air. His hips are still inside your heat.
"I missed this...Missed you," Sunghoon whispered, capturing your lips as he started to thrust gently.
He pulled back just enough to leave you aching for more. His lips moved intimately and slowly against your own as he slid back in. The wet sounds echoed off the cold walls, only prolonging your pleasure.
Sunghoon's hips shuddered against your own as he pushed himself closer to the edge. His breath came in short pants as you clenched around his cock.
"Fuck you're gonna make me come already." Sunghoon chuckled as he fucked you gently. His eyes were soft as he watched every twitch of pleasure on your face and felt it in your cunt.
"Park Sunghoon, you'd better." You replied with a weak chuckle. Your fingertips dug even harder into his biceps as his hips slapped even harder against your own.
"Fuck...yeah, I'm cumming," Sunghoon moaned, thrusting into you harder and faster until he reached his peak. He cried out your name as he came deep inside you. Filling up your cunt and shamelessly coating your walls with his pleasure.
You were right behind him, the sudden change in speed making your back arch even more. Sunghoon knew you too well. His hand was already between your thighs, rubbing tight circles on your swollen clit until you were cumming hard on his cock.
Warmth spread rapidly through your body as you came. Your evidence soaking his dark sheets where you were combined. The smell of sex and sweat lingered between you as you finally came back down to your senses.
"Holy Shit..." You cursed. wiping sweat from your brow as your cunt still pulsed from relief.
"Yeah, holy fucking shit." Sunghoon cursed, a wide smile spreading across his lips as he shamelessly kissed you again.
"No one else can make me come like you do." You confessed, lifting your gaze from the mess of cum between your bodies to finally meet his dark eyes.
"You always know exactly what to say to drive me crazy." Sunghoon smiled, dropping his forehead to your shoulder as his weight dropped on top of your body.
With a pleasured hum, you wrapped your arms around him. The scent of his cologne somehow still lingering despite how intense the sex was.
"You're more than welcome to stay the night, you know, you're always welcome to." Sunghoon offered, his voice muffled against your hot skin.
"Yeah? What about next weekend? Or is that asking too much from an ex." You asked softly, the teasing hint in your tone disappearing faster than you'd admit.
"Maybe, if we didn't fuck like we still want each other." Sunghoon pointed out, his arms wrapping even tighter around your body.
"So is that a yes?" You raised a brow as you asked.
"How's next Friday sound? Might as well stay the whole weekend." Sunghoon grumbled, hiding his smile in the crook of your neck.
"If you're eating me out again, I might have to take you up on the offer." You replied, sliding your fingertips tenderly into the short hair at the base of his neck.
"I can do it again right now if you want," Sunghoon mumbled before lifting his head to look at your face again.
"That's not something you do for an ex." You teased.
Sunghoon chuckled as he pulled himself from your body, his hands already guiding your thighs back over his shoulders.
"Well then, if that's the case? Maybe we don't have to be."
You knew Sunghoon was trouble, and you knew this holiday was a joke. Yet here you are, falling back into his bed like you still belong there.
pairing: park sunghoon x fem!reader
genre: smut, exes to lovers
This content is only for readers 18+
word count: 3.4K
content warning: strong language, explicit sexual content, exes-to-lovers, unprotected sex (creampie), oral sex(f recieving), praise, name-calling, soft missionary sex with pillow talk.
soundtrack: sugar talking - sabrina carpenter
✩⸻[ 𝐂atalogue. ]
kate's note: Thank you to @dollhoonki and @kissued for hosting this event!! This was such a fun prompt and it really helped me get out of my writers block. (This is like a week late but i hope you enjoy!)
Who even likes Valentine’s Day?
The overcrowded restaurants, the annoying Instagram posts, and the PDA alone was enough to make you gag.
It wasn’t a big deal for you, never was. You saw Valentine's Day for exactly what it was. A way to keep sales up after Christmas. More useless shit to buy, limited edition candy that no one really even wants.
All your friends had plans, of course. Being the only single one had its perks, but this weekend wasn’t one of them.
On the bright side, your rose was charged, your new favorite show played on your iPad as you started to order takeout on your phone.
Just as you were entering your card info, a text popped up at the top of your screen.
Your ex.
Sunghoon Park:
Hey, I know it’s been a while, and you probably
don’t want to hear from me today of all days, but
maybe give me a call? If you’re not busy tonight, of course.
Your fingers hovered over the text, heart racing as your face heated up from frustration or excitement. It was hard to tell.
That corny motherfucker.
Things with Sunghoon have always been complicated—for lack of better words. But time and time again, he proves—
He always ends up coming back.
You knew he couldn’t resist you. Like clockwork, he always ended up back on his knees, his eyes glassy as he begged you for forgiveness.
And God would that be a sight to see tonight.
You weren't even thinking straight as you opened up your contacts, fingertips hovering over the green circle before you pressed it.
The phone rang against your ear, the pause between sounds making your heart nearly stop beating.
“Hello?” Sunghoon’s rough voice echoed through the line.
“You texted?” You shuddered, feeling a chill of anticipation go down your spine.
“Are you with someone right now?” Sunghoon asked, his voice so heavy you could practically feel it through the phone.
“Not currently, no,” you replied. Biting your lip at the thought of what was to come next.
“Fuck, I can’t believe I’m asking you this,” Sunghoon groaned, his voice deep and low between shallow breaths.
You bit back a weak laugh, predictable, so fucking predictable. You glanced at your nightstand, making note of the time. He obviously was about to ask you to hook up, and it wouldn’t be the first time—
“Would you join me for dinner?”
Dinner?
You let out that awkward chuckle you were holding, the grip on your phone loosening as you ran the words through your mind again and again.
Dinner.
“Sunghoon do you have any idea what time it is right now?” you replied. Running a hand down your face in disbelief that he would ask you a question like that while you were already tucked in bed wearing your pajamas.
“I know fuck, I know. But just hear me out,” He stuttered.
“It’s nothing fancy, I promise. It doesn’t matter what you're wearing I—I just want to see you,” Sunghoon whispered, his voice cracking weakly under pressure.
“Let me guess, this stupid holiday is making you remember what you lost, right?” you snapped back. Heart still pounding heavy in your ears. Your chest felt heavy, and you couldn’t figure out if it was because of frustration or something different.
Sunghoon let out a deep sigh, and a faint moan slipped past his lips before he interrupted.
“You haven't eaten since the morning, haven't you?”
You scoffed, feeling the heat burning behind your cheeks at his words, the tenderness of his tone making your stomach flip—
“Gotcha,” Sunghoon whispered, making you choke on the witty reply stringing together behind your throat.
“How did you—Sunghoon I—”
“I made something, it's a little burned at the edges, but it might beat that takeout you were probably planning on ordering,” Sunghoon informed warmly.
Your heart teetered on the edge of wanting to scream, but curiosity put up a stronger fight.
“Please?" Sunghoon whispered, his voice so soft you could barely hear it through the line.
The seconds after that were long and heavy as you mentally thought of all the reasons this was a more than terrible idea. You hated that you were stuck in this loop, and maybe getting out wasn’t even what you wanted.
But before you could even fully process the pros and cons, you were replying…
“I’m on my way.”
+++
You still knew the way to his apartment, no directions needed. The backroads you took were comforting in a way, so many memories of joy and pain lingered.
Without hesitation, you knocked on the door; the silence following was almost enough to make you sprint down the hall back towards the parking garage.
It wasn’t long before the door opened with a soft click. The woody smell of Sunghoon’s faint cologne filled your senses as he stood in front of you, looking even better than you remembered.
“You actually came?” Sunghoon replied with a sigh of relief. His eyes raked up and down your figure as he held the door open for you. The scent of his apartment was nostalgic as you walked through the door.
With a snarky reply, you shot back—
“What? Did you think I was messing with you?”
Sunghoon nervously laughed at your response. His eyes locked on yours as he pulled the dish towel off his shoulder to wipe his hands. Like second nature, you followed him into the kitchen. The warm aromas are already filling the space.
“Listen, I know we have our—issues, but if there's anything I know for a fact, it's that you aren’t stupid,” Sunghoon stated, turning his back as he grabbed a wooden spoon to stir the large pot on the stovetop.
You scoffed, trying to hide your smirk as you noticed the way his white button-up shirt hugged the muscles of his back. The perfect curve and dip of his waist—
“Is that supposed to be a compliment?” You shot back.
“Oh, don’t tell me you like the romantic shit now,” Sunghoon replied as he brought the spoon to his lips, cooling it down with his breath before having a taste.
You noticed the way his brows furrowed before he leaned to reach into his spice cabinet.
“Cooking dinner in a white button-up and slacks is like the textbook example of romantic,” You smiled, watching as he continued to cook in front of you. Wiping the sweat from his brow as he finished decorating two glass plates.
“On Valentine's day of all fucking days,” you added. Closing the small distance between you, your hand gently resting on his shoulder as he turned to meet your gaze.
“It’s so romantic, totally gross. Sickening.” You replied sarcastically, smiling as you caught another whiff of Sunghoon's masculine perfume. The same scent that still happens to drive you crazy.
"You and your fucking humor—" Sunghoon laughed breathlessly as he turned his head to hide the massive smile he was holding back.
You watched the way the muscles of his back strained against that thin white shirt as he picked up two glass plates. A homemade pasta dish topped with fresh basil and parsley. The aroma that filled his small kitchen apartment was strangely homey and warm.
You followed him to the dinner table, the familiar decor bringing back memories—good and bad.
You fought on that couch, slammed that bedroom door more times than you could count.
Sunghoon set down the plates, awkwardly pulling out a chair and offering it to you with a soft flush across his cheeks.
You smiled weakly, fighting the urge to bite back at the kind gesture with a snarky remark.
With soft eyes, Sunghoon watched as you picked up your fork, twirling the silverware between your fingertips as you actively avoided his gaze.
"So how come you don't have a date tonight?" Sunghoon asked, clearing his throat like that was enough to kill the tension in the room.
Rapidly, your heart started beating faster as you thought of your answer. Why didn't you have a date? That question didn't even have an answer.
Was it because you were too busy to find someone? Or maybe you just couldn't get Sunghoon out of your mind long enough to look at your other options.
Deep down, you knew you didn't want them.
Not when Sunghoon knew you so well. He knows your silly little habits, he knows how easy it is to get wrapped up in work and forget about what's important.
"I—I don't really know. Guess I was just too busy with work." You replied with a nonchalant nod of acknowledgment.
Sunghoon hummed in reply, taking a bite off his own plate before he clasped his hands together in front of him on the table.
"Too busy to get laid?" Sunghoon asked with a dangerous smile and a raised eyebrow.
You let out a nervous laugh before stuffing your mouth with a bite of his food. Your eyes watered, but it was the only way to stop yourself from saying something beyond stupid.
"You know, Sunghoon, I'm shocked you didn't ask me to hook up twenty minutes ago when I came through that door." With a sharp laugh, you replied.
"Do you want to...hook up?" Sunghoon asked, his voice dropping an octave as his gaze met yours.
"Sunghoon..." You whispered as you violently tore away your gaze. He could tell you were already fighting it. Even though you were trying to hide the fact that deep down you were hoping he'd ask you that before you left for the night.
"Or not..." Sunghoon replied as he gently threw his arms up in surrender.
The silence between you was heavy as the seconds ticked by like minutes.
Your mind was racing, fighting your heart as you held back a devastating "yes."
"Park Sunghoon." You chuckled; the click of your silverware hitting the glass plate was enough to make him jump.
"You are so fucking predictable."
Sunghoon let out a huff of disbelief, like he almost wanted to be hurt by your words.
The dinner was long forgotten as he leaned over the table, nearly knocking over one of the fake candle decorations he had set out for this.
“If there's anything I know about you—” Sunghoon whispered, raising a brow before he continued.
“It’s that you fucking love predictable.”
His words hit you hard.
Your body was closing the distance before your mind screamed at you to stop.
“I’m what?” You spat out nearly chest to chest with him now. With a step forward, you cut off his balance, causing him to stumble and catch himself with his palms gripping the edge of the table.
“Don’t play dumb, trust me, I know you’re smarter than that,” Sunghoon replied with a knowing glint in his eyes.
You opened your mouth to speak, curses getting stuck heavy in your throat. The strength to let them free faltered when his gaze softened.
And then his eyes dropped to your lips.
Fuck.
You tried to hide the smirk tugging helplessly at your lips as you replied.
“Trust me. I know I’m smart.”
The tension between you was enough to bring down the building. Sunghoon held your gaze as his large hands softly cupped the sides of your face.
You weren't sure who leaned in first.
Your heart pounded as your lips met his. Soft, sweet, and a tenderness that you couldn’t replace.
His fingertips left your face to slide down your body, finding your lower back as he pulled you in close.
Your lips moved in harmony with his, gasps of pleasure and want fell helplessly as your fingertips tangled weakly in his dark hair.
Sunghoon pulled away, breath heavy against your lips as his heart pounded hard against his chest.
He couldn't help but pull you in closer until your chest was pressed tightly against his own.
His touch was gentle as he lifted a hand, softly brushing your hair behind your ear as he glanced down at you, his eyes flickering with something deeper than lust.
“You taste just as good as I remember–” Sunghoon whispered before he took the very breath from your lungs.
This time, when his lips met yours, it was hungry, desperate. You couldn’t tell if it was an insult or an apology, if that even mattered.
“Sunghoon, fuck…” You moaned against his lips, your hands roaming his body with no shame as your fingertips slipped beneath the cotton hem of his shirt.
Sunghoon moaned at your touch, his lips still brushing against your own as he struggled to catch his breath. Your touch only making the task harder.
"Fuck...Yeah. Fuck." Sunghoon panted with a weak smirk.
Sunghoon leaned in, closing the millimeters of distance between your lips. A deep moan got caught in his throat as you matched his fervor.
"Can we?" Sunghoon whispered between hot kisses, his breath wet against your neck as he kissed the skin beneath your jaw.
"Can we what?" You asked weakly, mentally punching yourself for how needy the question sounded as it left your lips.
"Can we fuck?" He whispered, his words barely loud enough to hear.
You hated how fast you whispered yes.
Sunghoon's hands moved with intention as he undressed you like so many times before. His fingertips lingered on your soft skin as he unclasped your bra before sliding the straps down your shoulders.
His sheets were cool against the warmth of your skin. His cologne lingered on the pillows as you sank into them.
"You look like you belong here," Sunghoon whispered as his lips dragged across your collarbone. His own shirt was discarded helplessly on the ground with yours.
You let out a breathless moan as you noticed the perfect, familiar lines and curves of his shoulders and biceps.
"Do I now?" You replied, sounding more helpless than snarky as his fingertips hooked between your pants and skin before he pushed the fabric down your hips.
"Mhm... can't wait to see you." Sunghoon moaned, his hands working with urgency as he pulled your panties down your thighs.
His hands pinned your thighs to the bed as you shivered, already dripping where you needed him most.
Sunghoon knew exactly what you wanted. There was no need for further conversation.
He dipped his head between your thighs, spreading them wide as his broad shoulders settled between them,
Sunghoon's mouth found your cunt, his tongue slipping between your folds to get a taste of what you had to offer.
You sat up on your elbows to watch as he dived in, his tongue working slowly and toughly just how you liked it.
His eyes fluttered shut with a groan as his hands slipped from your thighs to your ass. Sunghoon gripped you tighter, pulling your cunt into his face as he ate you out like he was starving for it.
Pleasure shot through your body from the skilled nature of his tongue. It was embarrassing how fast the heat was winding in your stomach.
"Fuck you taste so sweet." Sunghoon groaned, his words barely audible between the wet noises of his mouth on your cunt and the heavy breathing from your lips.
He lapped up the mess you were making on his tongue. As his hands slid back down to your thighs.
You were close, he could feel it in the way your toes curled, and your thighs shook against his shoulders.
Sunghoon moaned as he pulled away, your slick dripping down his chin as he licked his lips with a pleasured hum.
"Wanna come inside you...like how we used to do it," Sunghoon whispered against your thigh. He left a soft kiss on the skin there before he climbed back over you.
Your chest was still heaving as you nodded, your hands slipping between your bodies until you found the cold zipper of his pants.
Sunghoon moaned as you pulled it down while looking into his eyes. You didn't even notice you were biting your lips as your knuckles brushed across the bulge tucked behind.
His eyes stayed locked on yours as your hands slid to his waist, pushing his slacks over his hips and letting his cock spring against his stomach.
Sunghoon leaned in and kissed you, his skin already slick from sweat as your hands wrapped around his cock, feeling the ridges and sensitive spots you knew all too well.
"Fuck you feel too good," Sunghoon whispered breathlessly as he gripped the sheets on either side of your head. His muscles strained as he fought his hips from bucking up into your hand.
"Are you ready?" You whispered, pulling away just enough to catch his reaction.
"Never been more ready," Sunghoon replied, slipping his knee between your thighs to open up your legs.
You gasped as his cock brushed between your folds. Sunghoon coated himself in your slick with a groan before he slipped inside your hole.
The two of you moaned in sync as the thick head of his cock punctured your wet entrance. The stretch was even better than you remember.
Your back arched off the mattress as he fully slipped inside with a rough groan. His sweaty forehead dropped to your own as he panted for air. His hips are still inside your heat.
"I missed this...Missed you," Sunghoon whispered, capturing your lips as he started to thrust gently.
He pulled back just enough to leave you aching for more. His lips moved intimately and slowly against your own as he slid back in. The wet sounds echoed off the cold walls, only prolonging your pleasure.
Sunghoon's hips shuddered against your own as he pushed himself closer to the edge. His breath came in short pants as you clenched around his cock.
"Fuck you're gonna make me come already." Sunghoon chuckled as he fucked you gently. His eyes were soft as he watched every twitch of pleasure on your face and felt it in your cunt.
"Park Sunghoon, you'd better." You replied with a weak chuckle. Your fingertips dug even harder into his biceps as his hips slapped even harder against your own.
"Fuck...yeah, I'm cumming," Sunghoon moaned, thrusting into you harder and faster until he reached his peak. He cried out your name as he came deep inside you. Filling up your cunt and shamelessly coating your walls with his pleasure.
You were right behind him, the sudden change in speed making your back arch even more. Sunghoon knew you too well. His hand was already between your thighs, rubbing tight circles on your swollen clit until you were cumming hard on his cock.
Warmth spread rapidly through your body as you came. Your evidence soaking his dark sheets where you were combined. The smell of sex and sweat lingered between you as you finally came back down to your senses.
"Holy Shit..." You cursed. wiping sweat from your brow as your cunt still pulsed from relief.
"Yeah, holy fucking shit." Sunghoon cursed, a wide smile spreading across his lips as he shamelessly kissed you again.
"No one else can make me come like you do." You confessed, lifting your gaze from the mess of cum between your bodies to finally meet his dark eyes.
"You always know exactly what to say to drive me crazy." Sunghoon smiled, dropping his forehead to your shoulder as his weight dropped on top of your body.
With a pleasured hum, you wrapped your arms around him. The scent of his cologne somehow still lingering despite how intense the sex was.
"You're more than welcome to stay the night, you know, you're always welcome to." Sunghoon offered, his voice muffled against your hot skin.
"Yeah? What about next weekend? Or is that asking too much from an ex." You asked softly, the teasing hint in your tone disappearing faster than you'd admit.
"Maybe, if we didn't fuck like we still want each other." Sunghoon pointed out, his arms wrapping even tighter around your body.
"So is that a yes?" You raised a brow as you asked.
"How's next Friday sound? Might as well stay the whole weekend." Sunghoon grumbled, hiding his smile in the crook of your neck.
"If you're eating me out again, I might have to take you up on the offer." You replied, sliding your fingertips tenderly into the short hair at the base of his neck.
"I can do it again right now if you want," Sunghoon mumbled before lifting his head to look at your face again.
"That's not something you do for an ex." You teased.
Sunghoon chuckled as he pulled himself from your body, his hands already guiding your thighs back over his shoulders.
"Well then, if that's the case? Maybe we don't have to be."