Bob S. Aman Memorial Hospital Archive

Records of the strange events and people at BSAMH

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Surgeon’s Log: day 27 of VR therapy testing I’ve been getting complaints about subject 35’s riddles, so here’s a hint for today’s riddle: What do plants crave? There ya go. Just don’t tell her about this, I don’t want to end up as her dinner 😅 Subject 104.7 keeps trying to convert people, 101.5 talks too much about the current weather, and 95.9 has really sold out on ads, so for everyone’s wellbeing, they are heretofore banned from the intercom🥺 Subject $#\+! made a computer! It seems to run so fast that it predicts what you’re going to click on next. With that much processing power, it should have no trouble managing all 22 subjects’ VR headsets at once 😄 if you hear any whispers coming from it, that’s probably just the fans whirring. ☃ stay spooky ☃ - Randall

-- Posted to private hospital forum by Dr. Selina Kochs (Randall) [8/8/2020]

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Surgeon’s Log: day 26 of VR therapy testing Subjects 35, 19, and 21 are back on duty! Please be aware that they have recently unionized, so they will need payment before the carry you. Generally, it’s three riddles, but you might get requests for blood or your firstborn every once in a while 🤷‍♀️ Subject 104.7 is still singing gospel, but 101.5 has started singing 80’s and 90’s music, while 95.9 has taken to modern pop. Quite the groove! Subject $#\+! had a great time yesterday! He got a tour of the biomechanics lab, and even has his own pile of brains and sticks of ram to play with😊 👻stay spooky👻 - Randall (If I can’t remove the dang header, I’ll just fight it with a footer!)

-- Posted to private hospital forum by Dr. Selina Kochs (Randall) [8/8/2020]

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The management team have provided a helpful guide for staff dealing with bereaved relatives. Please remember to add your condolences onto their bill!👍🏻✅ Many thanks- have a great day 🥰

-- Posted to private hospital forum by Jim Fish [7/10/2020]

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Surgeon’s Log: day 25 of VR therapy testing Subjects 35, 19, and 21 are taking a break today, so everyone’s going to have to use the makeshift rope ladder we’ve constructed out of hospital gowns and stray gauze. Oh and also hair 😊 Subject 104.7 has decided to start a gospel group with specimens 101.5 and 95.9. I find that their songs will be incredibly pleasing to the demon portal! Subject $#\+! seems to be interested in the biomechanics lab. If Dr. Boon would be willing to just give him a pile of wires and limbs to toy with, that should keep him out of your hair.

-- Posted to private hospital forum by Dr. Selina Kochs (?) [8/7/2020]

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[Attached comment thread]

Dr. Boon: ☢️I always enjoy interest in biomechanics, I'll get bob and bob to do a guided tour☢️

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Surgeon’s Log: day 25 of VR therapy testing Subjects 35, 19, and 21 are taking a break today, so everyone’s going to have to use the makeshift rope ladder we’ve constructed out of hospital gowns and stray gauze. Oh and also hair 😊 Subject 104.7 has decided to start a gospel group with specimens 101.5 and 95.9. I find that their songs will be incredibly pleasing to the demon portal! Subject $#\+! seems to be interested in the biomechanics lab. If Dr. Boon would be willing to just give him a pile of wires and limbs to toy with, that should keep him out of your hair.

-- Posted to private hospital forum by Dr. Selina Kochs (?) [8/7/2020]

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Surgeon’s Log: day 24 of VR therapy testing The children’s hospital is still in the air, and I don’t think it’s coming back down anytime soon. Subject 35 is getting tired of ferrying everyone in and out, but fortunately some of the other subjects are now vampires, so she’s getting help from subjects 19 and 21 😄 Hopefully, Dr. Boon can get us a tractor beam for the hospital soon. In the meantime, subject 104.7 will be shouting random nonsense on the intercom to keep everyone alert, just to be safe.

-- Posted to private hospital forum by Dr. Selina Kochs (?) [8/5/2020]

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[Attached comment thread]

Dr. Boon: ☢There are difficulties in generating enough quantum gravity to counteract the forces already in play, however my research is proceeding with confidence☢

Dr. Selina Kochs: Great to hear!

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Surgeon’s Log: day 24 of VR therapy testing The children’s hospital is still in the air, and I don’t think it’s coming back down anytime soon. Subject 35 is getting tired of ferrying everyone in and out, but fortunately some of the other subjects are now vampires, so she’s getting help from subjects 19 and 21 😄 Hopefully, Dr. Boon can get us a tractor beam for the hospital soon. In the meantime, subject 104.7 will be shouting random nonsense on the intercom to keep everyone alert, just to be safe.

-- Posted to private hospital forum by Dr. Selina Kochs (?) [8/5/2020]

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Surgeon's Log: day 23 of VR therapy testing ALERT ALERT THE CHILDREN’S HOSPITAL IS FLYING! ☁️😅☁️ It looks like I was right, Specimen 13 has been up to something. For now, I have subject 35 ferrying people up and down, but it might help if we get a more permanent solution, like jet packs or something 😊 Let’s just hope he doesn’t levitate the rest of the hospital. Anyway, none of the other subjects I have have yet developed vampirism, and I’m a little dissapointed. Dr. Werner and his crew better get on it 😠

-- Posted to private hospital forum by Dr. Selina Kochs (?) [8/4/2020]

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-- Posted to private hospital forum by Dr. Jim Fish [6/14/2020]

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Surgeon’s Log: day 22 of VR therapy testing So, still haven’t figured out how to remove the header. Whatever. All therapy volunteers with O- blood have been clearly labeled. Totally not trying to turn some of them into vampires... 😉 Specimen 13 is still inactive, but the cracks in the foundation have gotten noticeably larger. It’s probably just me, but I think he’s up to something 🧐 Subject 35 has been collecting a lot of string and honey; I think she’s trying to make a web. Don’t know why she hasn’t just irradiated Logan Luevano and asked him to bite her.

-- Posted to private hospital forum by Dr. Selina Kochs (?) [8/3/2020]

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[Attached comment thread]

Kara Isley: What is specimen 13?

Jim Fish: it sounds scary!!! 😬

Dr. Selina Kochs: Specimen 13 is the child that Dr. Kochs took in as the third test subject. Somehow he seems to have gained psychic powers...

Logan Luevano: Fun Fact: My venom gives you a boner for like 2 hours before you die 🕷

Kara Isley: what about women? > [4 more replies]

Kara Isley: @ Pamela Isley honey I think I might need your help. > [11 more replies]

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Surgeon’s Log: day 22 of VR therapy testing So, still haven’t figured out how to remove the header. Whatever. All therapy volunteers with O- blood have been clearly labeled. Totally not trying to turn some of them into vampires... 😉 Specimen 13 is still inactive, but the cracks in the foundation have gotten noticeably larger. It’s probably just me, but I think he’s up to something 🧐 Subject 35 has been collecting a lot of string and honey; I think she’s trying to make a web. Don’t know why she hasn’t just irradiated Logan Luevano and asked him to bite her.

-- Posted to private hospital forum by Dr. Selina Kochs (?) [8/3/2020]

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Surgeon’s Log: day 21 of VR therapy testing So, it occurs to me that none of you know who I am. You may know me, Randall, better as subject 2; I became a ghost (no, I won’t tell you how), and have recently possessed Dr. Selina Kochs’ body. Story time aside, Subject 35 has found a better way of getting what she wants- she’s been shoving children through Dr. Girl’s entropic duplicator-tron. Would help if the kinks were worked out- the process produces a lot of dwarves and half-children 😂 Specimen 13 has lately stopped levitating objects, but I think he’s working on something greater- the number of cracks in the children’s hospital’s foundation is concerning... 😬 P.S. does anyone know how to get rid of the “surgeon’s log” header? I’m not really all that tech savvy... P.P.S. My VR army is growing! Thanks to the duplicator-tron, I now have 22 mindless servants (although 2 of them seem pretty independent...)

-- Posted to private hospital forum by Dr. Selina Kochs (?) [8/1/2020]

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Surgeon’s Log: day 20 of VR therapy testing AHAHAHAHA!! That FOOL of a doctor Selina Kochs should have known that VR mind control doesn’t work on ghosts! Now I, RANDALL, am in control! I have ten mindless drones, as well as a psychic boy and a spider-lady at my disposal 😈 Now I can do whatever I want! First order of business: SURGERIES! And BILLING!!!

-- Posted to private hospital forum by Dr. Selina Kochs (?) [7/31/2020]

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Surgeon’s Log: day 19 of VR therapy testing Subject 35 relapsed today. Found her lair full of half-consumed children and the like; NOT COOL. She will be reprimanded for costing us so much monetary potential 😡 Specimen 13 is apparently now capable of lifting entire FLEETS OF CARS with whatever abilities he has. For safety, wear a parachute AT ALL TIMES ☁️🤞😋👍☁️ Lastly, recent evidence has proven to me that Subject 2 is indeed the one behind the latest incidents in the children’s wing. Fortunately, the VR headsets they are equipped with have mind-controlling capabilities (again, thank you, Area 51), so I will just make him... NOT do that 😇 Also, thanks for all your support- I’ve managed to round up ten more individuals to add to the VR therapy clinical trial!

-- Posted to private hospital forum by Dr. Selina Kochs [7/31/2020]

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☢️We now need to conclusively prove whether this is Selina Kochs subject 2 or some other phenomena. We are starting to get complaints from the janitorial staff about all the blood stains and "ectoplasm" they have to clean up This is why the floors have been so slippery lately☢️ ☢️I wonder where it took the corpse?☢️ ☢️Doctor Boon radiology & biomechanics☢️

-- Posted to private hospital forum by Dr. Boon [7/30/2020]

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Surgeon’s Log: day 18 of VR therapy testing WARNING: Specimen 13 is now capable of levitating hospital beds, I HIGHLY advise installing handles on the walls to avoid floating away ☁️😇☁️ Subject 35 is doing well, she has started giving children rides around the hospital, and she loves showing them her lair! Now if only she would stop losing track of them... Subject 2 has been acting a little creepy lately. I regularly find him trying to sneak up on me from behind; fortunately, the squeaky clown shoes I’ve forced him to wear seem to stop that 😄 no idea where his cow bell ended up though 🤔

-- Posted to private hospital forum by Dr. Selina Kochs [7/29/2020]

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[Attached comment thread]

Dr. Boon: ☢I fear subject 2 might be doing more than just sneaking up on people☢

Dr. Selina Kochs: maybe...

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FINALLY!!! The pioneering surgery that none dared dream was possible! As you can see- I am delighted to announce that we have now successfully surgically attached a fully functioning dog’s head- onto a human body. 🙌🏻 For centuries- mankind has longed to be closer to his Best Friend. Now they can both- at last- truly be as one ❤ We have created the perfect being- the bravery, steadfastness and loyalty of a dog- with the body and genitalia of a human. 🐶👖 PRAISE BOB! 🙌🏻🥰

-- Posted to private hospital forum by Dr. Jim Fish [7/14/2020]