Ahhhhh. 😎
Claire Keane

oozey mess

⁂
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
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Kaledo Art

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$LAYYYTER

#extradirty
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
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@budding-nomad
Ahhhhh. 😎
Owlets meet owl photographer.
4.1.21 9:54PM
Happy April Fool's day!
Survived work. It was kind of busy. Went by fast. I have a lot I want to do tomorrow. I made list.
Didn't do shit today because A.'s evening appointment canceled. This is the second time this week that has happened. Now I understand why married people get fat. Only one appointment tomorrow. FML. I don't think he realizes we are closed tomorrow because he didn't ask me to go with. Or could it be that he has finally realized I have no interest in going to a town in the middle of nowhere while he works? Nah.
Been watching 60 days in and looking for Alaska. So far, I like both.
3.31.21 7:18AM
I am really looking forward to having two days off this week. They have decided to change operating hours at work starting May 3rd which means we will start working 5 day work weeks. Yay!!! This is long overdue. I had no idea when I came back that I would be working 6 day work weeks/split shifts for 6 MONTHS. I thought maybe a couple months, by November that would change, but nope. Work was too cheap to bring anyone back so their solution was to force us to work shitty hours while the big wigs worked 5 day work weeks and took sporactic time off. I feel my work has made a lot of terrible decisions this year. I feel like I have no voice here. I am not heard. When I talk, they brush off what I say. Nothing is taken seriously. Nothing is done. I am staying for the benefits(health insurance) and to put money towards the boat. I want to leave, but then A. will expect me to go with him to work everyday(will he ever earn boundaries?!) and FUCK THAT. I would rather kill myself than alow him to drag me all over the state with him and sit in the hot/cold car bored to the death and sweating/freezing to death just because he can't work on his clinginess issues. To be fair, he did tell me when we started dating, that he was clingy. I think stifling is the more the word he was looking for, though. Or suffocating. lol.
Anywayyyy, I need to focus on being productive. I feel like I am always behind. I either don't have the time to get everything done, or don't have the energy. On the days I do have the time or energy(like yesterday), A.'s appointments get cancelled and he comes home early. I am still not working out when he is home because I don't need the micro managing. Obviously, I am not going to rollerblade(he would want to come with) or clean(more micromanaging). I didn't mention that I like having rollerblading as my thing that I do alone to clear my mind. Do you think he picked up on that hint? He's not the greatest at that. It's difficult for me because I don't like saying no and setting those boundaries, but he puts me in a position where I have to. I am getting a lot better at identifying situations where I know boundaries will need to be created and better and drawing those lines. Mostly thanks to work. I never would have guessed that would come in handy so much in my personal life. I didn't even know what boundaries were until I started working here. Crazy.
Got a few Easter candies for myself at the store the other day. I am not going to pass on candy on Easter.
3.30.21 6:34PM
Absolutely gorgeous today. 66 degrees. A. had appointments all day, but last two canceled. He came home while I was napping. I didn't get to workout. No cardio, no lifting. Boo! One of my coworkers brought in scones for me and my one of the other girls in my department, so my fast was ruined. Funny thing, everytime I went to work hungry, I hoped he would bring in the scones and when he finally did, it hurt my stomach. I guess I'm not used to eating like that. It was my first time having a scone. It was good, but not my favorite of baked goods.
3.29.21 8:25AM
Hi ho, hi ho, it's off to work I go.
Back at work this morning. Sundays are sacred around my house. It is soooo nice to have a day off to sleep in and get some stuff done. It actually snowed yesterday. Actually, that isn't that crazy. I keep forgetting it's only March. It's supposed to be 57 today.
A. is supposed to work all day, so I need to do cardio and lift. My chest was still sore yesterday from last week. Crazy.
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3.25.2021 7:24AM
Sorry I haven't been posting much. Work told us we can't do anything that isn't to help pass the time anymore. It has to be work related, so I will probably not be posting as much anymore. Not really sure what they expect us to do. There is literally nothing for us to do. No busy work. No actual work. I guess we are just supposed to sit here and twiddle our thumbs and stare into space. Time is really going to pass by slowly now. Especially considering we are going into our slow season. I would love to see some of the "big wigs" work 6 days a week and not doing anything personal up here. Obviously, if it were even a little busy, I would understand, but considering it's slow, and considering we are scheduled 6 days or split shifts so it makes it difficult to get stuff done, it's not unreasonable to allow people a little leeway to make work more bearable. Apparently that is unreasonable. I don't think I have to tell you that was quite a blow to what little morale we had left around here. Coloring was a popular thing around here to pass the time and now we can't do that. They put a table upstairs with all kinds of goodies to help lift employees' spirits including adult coloring books and colored pencils so it seems hypocritical to now tell us we can't color. At this point, I would rather be in a retail position. At least in a retail position, there is something to do to pass the time, and stocking is more fulfilling than this job at this point. Sadly, some retail positions(Target, Costco) pay more than this job, too.
It was really nice earlier in the week. I tried to rollerblade Tuesday evening. I was literally putting on my rollerblades when I received a text from A. saying he was on his way home, so that was the end of that. At least I got to go Monday. I thought about going last night but it was windy and cold. I stayed home and did a chest workout instead. I did arms and abs monday and I have been sore the last couple days. My chest isn't sore today, but maybe tonight or tomorrow. Lately, I haven't been sore until the second day. It's weird.
I can't wait until next week. We are closed on Good Friday. If A. isn't working, we should go visit my Grandma on Easter.
I would love to go hiking/rock hunting behind his grandma's old place again, but we would have to have the time. Free time isn't something A. has a lot of these days and our schedules are opposite. I struggle with taking it easy and resting on our day off or doing something fun and adventurous. That's why having two days off is nice. You can relax/be productive one day and do something fun the other day. I mean, relaxing is fun, too, but you know what I mean. I just have to keep telling myself this isn't forever. And I am valued here, even though I question that every single day and don't feel like the actions around here reflect that.
A. has suggested just putting my paychecks into an account and putting that towards the boat. I think this is a good idea. It will make me feel like I am actually contributing to the boat. When we eventually get a boat, I will feel like I have some ownership of it. I am thinking I will use cash app to do this.
I think this is enough rule breaking for the day. Ha. Time to get back to staring into space.
3.23.21 8:08AM
There was a fire across the street from work yesterday. P. was here so he gave me the details. It started at a warehouse and jumped(?) to a nearby house. Only the side of the house got burned, but they will probably have to knock it down. I would hate to go to work one morning and come home to find my house has been burned to the ground. Thankfully, as far as fires go, they got off lucky.
P. says the fire was huge. He was sending me snaps as it was happening. It looked huge. I guess they were in a meeting when an employee noticed it looked smokey outside. When they went outside to investigate, they saw a lot of smoke by one of the other buildings on the property. When P. turned around to say something to his boss, he saw all the smoke, pointed, and said,"Holy shit!" Everyone turned to look and saw the smoke. They thought there was a car on fire in the parking lot. P.'s boss said to call 911. He took off running around the side of the building while calling 911. They said they were aware of the situation and firefighters were on the way.
To be continued...
3.21.2021
Weighed myself today. 158.8. Woohoo! It's probably because I'm dehydrated right now, but still, it's been a long time since I've seen 150 in the scale.
3.20.2021
This is the end of week 3 of fasting and week 2 of dieting. Unfortunately, when I weighed myself this morning, I was still 166.8. Thankfully, with my height, I carry my weight well. To be fair, my fasting hasn't been the greatest. I just got this new app called fasting that I like much better than zero. It actually tells you what is going on with your body during each stage of the fasting process. For some reason, this motivates me. I did well today. Fasted for fifteen and a half hours without too much trouble. Not like Thursday. I was really struggling that day. Everyday is different, though, and I know fasting takes some getting used to. I'm not going to stop trying, though. I don't like what I see when I look in the mirror and progress is exciting. I am excited to see my body once I have lost weight. More excited to see it once I have put on muscle. Since I'm getting better with the fasting(not great, but getting there) I want to add more strength training next week. I would also like to do cardio(rollerblading for me)2 or 3 times a week. I think that's a good balance. This is the perfect time to do it. Just in time for summer. 🙂 I want to look good when I go camping up north.
3.19.2021 6:48AM I am so tired today. You kind of get used to getting up this early after a while, but not really. Tomorrow I get to sleep in an hour later because we open an hour later. Yay. A. has the day off, but will he actually not work today? Everytime he has a day off, he usually ends up doing work of some sort. I suggested getting the leporine fixed, which I do everytime he says he has a day off. We have passed the window when it is recommended to get her fixed and if she gets too old, the vet could outright refuse to spay her which could cause serious health problems down the line. The other option(which is less preferred) would be getting the car in working order and tags updated and then I could make an appointment and just take her, but I would prefer to have A. with me in case something goes wrong or we have to have any kind of decision. Who knows? One of the directors brought us donuts. I am supposed to be fasting, but I said fuck it and had one anyway. It really made me feel better. Surprisingly, I am still hungry and somehow, that makes me feel better. I feel like I haven't been eating much later and I haven't been eating junk food(except the donut), but I am still so bloated all the time. 👎 I will stick with it and I'm sure the weight will come off. The weather is getting warmer. It's starting to feel like spring! The weather next week is supposed to be in the upper 50s and lower 60s next week. Woohoo!!
I know I am not alone when I say sometimes I really miss dinner dates. I used to always go and get hibachi with A. and then see a movie. As an introvert, quarantine hasn't been as hard for me as it has been for some people. I prefer solitude. I prefer to be alone. I like being isolated. Just being around people, even though I may not be directly interacting with them, is enough for me. I used to try to be more social. Force myself to be an extrovert, but why? That's just not who I am and life is too short to try to force yourself to be someone you aren't.
The Atlanta Constitution, Georgia, August 4, 1941
11:14AM I opened with my supervisor today because K. took the day off for her birthday. Good for her. Working all the time gets to her I think. It's sunny out today and supposed to to be like 54 degrees out, so hopefully I can rollerblade later. A. is supposed to have a 6pm appointment, but with St. Patrick's Day, I am wondering if they will cancel. I hope not because I need the exercise/want the exercise(for physical reasons and mental). If I don't go, it's supposed to be nice pretty much all week next week,, so for sure next week, but obviously I would prefer to go today and next week. One of the coworkers brought in candy. So tempting, but I am controlling myself. It's all different types of chocolate, too. A. was so late last night, he told me to lay down and I fell asleep for the night. He said he woke me up when he got home and we were talking, but I don't remember. He brought Arbys, so I had my wrap this morning before work. No fasting today. Ideally, I want to be done eating for the day by 9:30, but that requires him to home early and that doesn't usually happen when he has 6pm appointments for work. Especially if they are far away, like last night. I'm trying to decide what to do for my birthday if anything. I was thinking about taking off the day of, but I think I would rather take off that Saturday and have the weekend off. I wonder what the chances are of A. getting the weekend off. Then we could go up north and to a beach or maybe two. We could stay in Petoskey or Traverse City. Maybe I could even drag him to Whitefish Point. That would be so awesome. Or maybe visit Tahquamenon Falls. That would be cool. I miss roadtripping so bad. It's been a year now since we went on what I shall refer to as "the epic road trip" from this point forward. Or, "the epic road trip part 1, 2, and 3" would be more accurate. Back to work. I'll check back later perhaps.
8:39PM
I ended up going rollerblading. It felt so good to get some cardio exercise. A. is on his way back so no strength training tonight. Maybe tomorrow. :/ It ended up being a bit too cold for comfort. With the wind it was still pretty chilly. I don't regret going, but it it wasn't as relaxing as I had hoped. There is a point where it is so windy, it's just kind of annoying. Lol. Got home and took a shower. Now I am doing laundry while I wait for A.
The Most Chilling Cold Cases in the United States
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Unexpected. (via)