for @pitt-yuri-week's free day, Yolanda Garcia considers the consequences of her no marriage policy:
Yolanda didn't even see her fall.
It happened on the way back down. They had just stopped for a water break when Trinity turned to take a picture of the view through the trees to send to Whitaker. She was laughing to herself with whatever she had come up with when her boot caught on a rock that shifted under her weight.
Yolanda was looking down at her own phone when she heard the scream that would haunt her for the rest of her life.
Yolanda looked up and Trinity was gone.
Yolanda didn't remember screaming herself. She didn't remember how she scrambled down the cliff after Trinity without falling or getting injured. Yolanda didn't care how she got there. She just needed to get to Trinity, she slide down the final several feet on her butt when the ground was too steep.
Trinity had one arm behind her back while blood was rushing down her thigh, spreading from a wound where a broken off stick was twisted inside of her. There was blood on her face, in her hair. She wasn't moving when Yolanda finally reached her. Yolanda's training took over first. Her hands were shaking as she pressed two fingers to Trinity's neck.
Trinity made a faint noise.
Thank God.
"Trin, look at me," She touched Trinity's face with her hand, eyes flickering to the wound on her thigh before back up to her head. Even with the stick still in the wound, blood was trickling fast down Trinity's bare thigh. Her thigh that was also bruised and had scrapes almost everywhere. Yolanda had to focus. She had to think.
Using her knife, she made a tourniquet with a the strap from her backpack. She pulled it as tight as it could above the wound on Trinity's thigh. It wasn't ideal. It wasn't wide enough and she had nothing sturdier to use than her fucking hiking pole.
Trinity cried out as she twisted until the blood slowed from a steady stream to just a dark, uneven seep around the wound.
"I know," Yolanda had hushed. It was enough that her hands had stopped for a half a second before she forced herself to keep turning. "I'm sorry."
Trinity's eyes were fluttering as she looked over towards Yolanda.
"What happened?"
"You fell."
Trinity tried to move before Yolanda could stop her and another sharp sound escaped her bloody lips.
"Do not move," Yolanda's voice was shaking. "Your leg is injured and your arm may be broken." She didn't mention that she wasn't sure if she had a spinal or neck injury and wouldn't risk moving her. "You have to stay still. Do you understand?"
There was no service where Trinity had landed. Yolanda screamed up for help until her throat gave out on the off chance that another hiker would come close enough to hear.
Yolanda inventoried her injuries over and over again. If she was in the OR or the ED or anywhere else that wasn’t covered in brush and rocks, she could do more. She could fix it. Out here, she can't do anything but scream for help and hope that the blood loss has slowed enough that she won't bleed out.
When nobody came after another few minutes of yelling, Yolanda made a decision.
An awful, terrible decision.
"You have to stay awake," she had made Trinity promise before she stood up. Her hands held Trinity's face in between them. Her thumb rubbed against her cheeks. God, she was beautiful. Yolanda didn't want to lose her. Trinity was blurry with the amount of tears in her eyes. "You have to keep your eyes open, do you understand me?"
Once Trinity had promised, or nodded which Yolanda was taking as the same thing, she had to stand up. She pressed Trinity's hands onto the wound in place of her own and whispered, don't you dare.
Then she walked away from her.
——————————————————————————————
The whole trip had been Yolanda’s idea.
It wasn't even suppose to be a vacation. Yolanda had gotten approval to attend a surgical conference in Denver and when she had realized that the hotel was paying for three nights at a hotel, she decided to add an additional three in the mountains afterwords.
"You could come with me," Yolanda had said to Trinity one night when they were making dinner. Or rather, she was making dinner and Trinity sat on the counter talking.
"To the conference?"
"To Colorado, I don't think they'd let you in the conference."
Trinity huffed in annoyance but Yolanda had just smiled in response.
"Come on, it'll be fun."
"Sitting in a hotel room while you are off with other surgeons will be fun? Do you even know how big your ego is going to be in place like that with a bunch of other surgeons?"
"You survive my ego at home just fine."
Trinity had just looked at her in the way that Yolanda knew that she was reading beneath what she was saying or beneath what she wasn't saying.
"You want me to come on your work trip?" Trinity had smiled.
"That's literally what I said." Yolanda had just rolled her eyes.
In the end, Trinity traded two shifts and met her two days into the conference in Denver. Yolanda skipped one of the speakers to pick her up from the airport. Trinity spent the last day of the conference sending pictures to Yolanda's phone of everything that Yolanda suddenly wished she was doing instead. Even Emery had turned to tease her about it the day before she arrived, "couldn't even leave your girlfriend at home for a few days to visit your old friend, huh?"
And maybe she couldn't.
But she didn't want to.
They made plans with Emery for the last day to hang out before they head back to Pittsburgh before they headed up to the cabin that Yolanda had rented out towards Vail.
Trinity had complained about the trial that she had chosen. She complained about the six am wake up to get to the trail just as much as she complained about the cold once they were on the trail. Trinity slipped her hand into Yolanda's whenever the path widened enough to let them walk beside each other. Yolanda didn't even mind the sweat.
By the time they reached the overlook, Trinity's complaints had quieted. It was a more beautiful view than they'd get anywhere in Pittsburgh. Only took 4 miles to get there, but as Trinity stood at the edge of the marked area, her cheeks pink from a combination of the uphill battle they had undertaken to get to the lookout and the cold and her hair pulled back into a ponytail, Yolanda knew exactly why she had wanted her to come in the first place.
If she had done this hike alone or with Walsh, she would have been thinking of Trinity the entire time.
She would have seen the view of the mountains and thought Trinity should see this.
That had started happening with everything.
She would hear a story during rounds or see something ridiculous on her drive home and her first thought would always turn to Trinity.
Yolanda thought of next month and Trinity was there. Next year and Trinity a little older, but still there. A different hospital or city or a house without Whitaker in it and Trinity was in each one of those visions too.
Yolanda had never pictured vows or rings.
Trinity was already built into every version of the future she allowed herself to imagine.
"What?" Trinity asked with a shy smile as she caught Yolanda staring at her.
Yolanda took out her phone to avoid answering and lifted it towards her. Trinity shifted and groaned out a "please, no."
She took the picture anyway.
Later, she would remember the smile on Trinity's face when she took the picture. She'd remember the certainty that settled inside of her that this was just the first of many.
There would be years of it.
She never realized that was just hope.
——————————————————————————————
It took nearly five minutes for Yolanda to claw her way back up to the trail. The slope had seemed steep when she was coming down, but climbing it with blood still sticky on her hands and panic in her chest made it feel nearly impossible. She almost lost her own footing twice.
After that, it was another fifteen down the trail before she finally got one bar of service. But it was enough. She was able to dial 911 and say things like twenty-nine year old female, fell off a cliff, femoral artery may be hit, tourniquet in place, going unconscious, along with every single geographical location she could think of before hanging up. The dispatcher kept telling her not to hang up, but Yolanda had done what she set out to do.
They knew where to find them. She wasn't going to waste time on the phone when she could be with Trinity.
Another hiker spotted Yolanda standing in the middle of the trail with blood across her clothes and hands and immediately came with to help.
It took less than 10 to get back to Trinity.
Her eyes were shut when they got back to her.
"No," Yolanda dropped to her knees with a hard thud and started tapping her cheek with blood stained fingers. "Open your eyes, come on."
Trinity didn't respond.
The other hiker dropped to her knees next to them, saying something about pinging their location with her GPS, but Yolanda barely heard her. Her fingers were already at Trinity's neck again, pressing hard enough that she was worried she would miss the pulse because her hands were shaking so badly.
It was still there.
Thready, but there.
"Trinity," Yolanda leaned over her. She cupped the side of her face in one hand, while the other checked the tourniquet. Trinity's hand had slipped away from holding pressure while she was gone. More blood had gathered underneath her despite the tourniquet. "Trin, I need you to wake up."
She pulled the hiking pole tighter and Trinity's body jerked and she finally let out a noise before murmuring, "you're not a very nice girlfriend."
Yolanda almost laughed.
"I'm going to be the worst girlfriend you have ever had if you close your eyes again."
Trinity opened her eyes finally. They were already blood shot; she must have hit her head harder than Yolanda thought. "You already said no to being promoted."
Yolanda didn't laugh.
Trinity blinked and looked at Yolanda like she was finally recognizing her. She could see that Trinity had started to shake as well underneath the jacket that Yolanda had draped over her before leaving. She wondered if—
"It hurts," Trinity's teeth were clenched together. Tears welled in her beautiful eyes and Yolanda wished she could take away the pain. She wished she could haul Trinity up over her shoulder and take her to the hospital herself. She wanted to put her on the operating table and fix her.
But Trinity had landed without Yolanda even seeing. She didn't know if she had hit her head on rocks on the way down or if her spine was even stable enough to move. She didn't know if her pelvis was fractured or any of the other horrifying possibilities that ran through her head when she looked over her injuries.
Moving her could make everything so much worse.
"Yolanda, it hurts," she cried out, her breaths seemed painful now.
"I know," Yolanda brushed the hair away from Trinity's face, leaving a red streak across her temple. "I'm sorry."
Trinity kept losing color as the minutes past. The other hiker unfolded an emergency blanket from their own backpack and helped Yolanda cover Trinity with it without moving her. "Rescue says 20 minutes or less," she said quietly to Yolanda when Trinity's eyes kept drifting shut.
Twenty minutes felt like an impossible amount of time.
"I need you keep those eyes open, okay?" Yolanda pressed Trinity's cold hand between both of hers. "Come on, you have to help me."
"It's okay," Trinity's words had begun to slur together. When Yolanda checked her eyes again, this time she could see that they were uneven. Had they been uneven before? Had she just missed it because she was so focused on the bleeding? Damn it, how had she missed that? Was there increased intracranial pressure? An expanding bleed? Something Yolanda missed while sitting right next to her.
"Tell me your name," Yolanda's voice had started to shake.
Trinity frowned.
"Tell me your name," she said, louder now.
Trinity stared up at the sky, "Trinity."
"Full name."
"Trinity Santos."
"Good, where are we?"
"Outside?"
The other hiker drew in a sharp breath.
"Come on, where are we?"
Trinity's eyebrows scrunched together and she said nothing.
"Come one, we're in Colorado, remember?"
Trinity's eyes moved slowly towards her. "Yolanda brought me here."
She nodded. "That's right, now you have to open your eyes again, okay?"
Trinity didn't move. Yolanda pressed her knuckles against Trinity's sternum, rubbing down until Trinity made a broken noise, opening her eyes for half a second before narrowing them at Yolanda.
"Stop."
"Then keep your eyes open," she knew her tone was harsh, but she didn't care. She needed Trinity to keep those green eyes open.
"Mm, it's okay," Trinity's words slurred. "Yolanda will fix me."
Trinity was looking past her now, eyes unable to stay focus. She kept speaking as if Yolanda was somewhere else, as if Yolanda was someone else.
"I'm right here," she felt something inside of her fracture.
Trinity didn't seem to hear her. "Yolanda will fix me," she repeated, the words slurring together. There was something almost childlike in the certainty of the words. "She's a surgeon. She'll fix me."
——————————————————————————————
By the time the rescue team reached them thirty minutes later, Trinity had stopped making sense. She kept drifting in and out underneath Yolanda's watch. She'd only wake up when Yolanda would rube her sternum or sometimes when Yolanda would squeeze her hand and demand that she come back. She asked Yolanda if they had missed their flight and if Whitaker was still planning on order food for them that night. Twice she asked where Yolanda was while staring right through her.
Yolanda was able to slip back into doctor mode when they approached. The words came out clinical as she offered them the only version of herself she had to give them.
The rescue team were already crouched at Trinity's head with a light out, calling out stats back to his partner. "Trinity? Trinity, can you hear me?"
There was no response.
"Trinity." Yolanda tried this time, but still nothing. "She was talking to me a minute ago."
Someone held a hand out as she tried to get closer. "We've got her, okay? I need you to give us room, we're gonna move fast."
They placed a real tourniquet high on her thigh before removing the makeshift one that Yolanda had made. Trinity barely responded to the stimuli and that worried Yolanda more. They fit a C-collar around her neck and Yolanda could only hold Trinity's free hand and try to stay out of the way. Yolanda was forced to watch as they cut off her shorts and then her sweatshirt as Trinity just started really crying with soft pleases underneath it.
She could only press kisses to Trinity's uninjured hand and pray that Trinity wouldn't remember this. Yolanda wouldn't be that lucky, she would remember every second of it for the rest of her life.
"She's seizing," someone said and her world tilted sideways.
It lasted thirty seconds but it felt like the entirety of Yolanda's future was held in that moment. Trinity's body fell back in a way that was worse than the seizure itself. The medic by her head was already calling into his walky for the status of the helicopter and they started moving her onto the board.
It took almost seven of them to get haul Trinity up the thirty feet of loose rock that she had fallen down for the helicopter to even be able to reach them. The flight medic stopped Yolanda before she could get close to where the helicopter was circling above.
"You can't come," he shouted over the noise.
"I'm a physician. You need to watch the tourniquet has already been on for—"
"I'm sorry, we only have space for the patient and the crew."
Behind him, they were securing Trinity down into the basket stretcher that they'd use to hoist her up into the air. She was covered by a orange fabric that wrapped around the entire stretcher.
"I have to be with her," the words cracked down the middle. "Please, I need to be with her."
"You won't be too far behind us," the man promised but it didn't matter. How could they be asking her to leave Trinity again? "We can't even touch down here."
Trinity turned her eyes towards the sound of Yolanda's voice. She was strapped tightly to a board. Her face was mostly hidden by the oxygen mask they had placed on her, but Yolanda could see the panic in her eyes.
"I'll meet you there," she shouted over the noise of the blades. She pushed past the medic, just to be able to lean to press her lips to Trinity's forehead, the only available piece of Trinity left uncovered.
If this was the last time…
She didn't let herself finish that thought.
"I love you," Yolanda said instead, her mouth close enough to Trinity's ear that she didn't have to shout. "I love you, I'll be right behind you. I promise."
Trinity's eyes found hers over the top of the oxygen mask. Her lips moved and Yolanda couldn't hear it over the engine, but she didn't need to. She'd know the shape of her own name on Trinity's mouth anywhere, no matter if she could hear or not. She had felt it against her skin, she had heard it whispered to her on nights where it was so quiet Yolanda thought she had just dreamed it. She knew every version of it coming out of Trinity's mouth.
"I know, I'll meet you there.."
The tears burned in her eyes as the hiker that had helped grasped her by the arms and started to pull her away from the medics on the ground. She turned, her eyes already narrowed and ready to lash out. "Let go."
"You can't-"
"I don't give a fuck what you think, let go of me."
She twisted in her grasp until she let go, but by then it was too late.
"No," she lunged forward without any plan and the hiker grabbed her again. "No, wait-" she watched as the basket that held her life was already off the ground. It was already starting to spin slowly against the cable and Yolanda was desperate.
She hadn't even gotten to see her face one more time. It broke something loose in her chest. She had spent her last seconds with Trinity yelling at some woman who was only trying to keep her alive and in the middle of that, Trinity had gone up without Yolanda getting one more look.
There was a UTV waiting for her at the base of one of the switchbacks that one of the officers said would get her back to the trailhead faster than walking. They gave her directions to the hospital and told her they already radio that she'd be following. They asked if she had gotten injured or if any of the blood on her belonged to her.
No, she thought bitterly. Every single drop of it staining her belonged to Trinity.
im learning about tags: im going to call the crossroads one choices!au <- and i think its quite cute that the internet decided on an exclamation mark :) ! for their own universes and dreams dreams!au happy!au thats very nice
but the concept of a greys anatomy style hook up for barantos before her first day, BUT it’s not Trinity that is the most shocked at seeing Baran at PTMC that day, but Yolonda.
Yolanda, who all of a sudden needs to talk to Trinity after work, but they get cornered by Baran who looks at Yolanda who is shaking her head before turning to Trinity and saying, “so, Dr. Santos, I didn’t realize you were the one who’d been sleeping with my wife.”
baran’s life falls apart somewhere around 9:30 in the morning when her son’s panicked little voice yells out for her as he’s wheeled in on a gurney.
and she’s at his side almost instantaneously, shouldering past samira a little too hard to get a look at her boy
he’s sobbing messily, blood trickling down the side of his face.
vehicle versus pedestrians, driver had a seizure behind the wheel, ploughed through a red light and caught a pedestrian as she went the paramedic is saying
and someone is trying to tug her out the way, as they transfer her son, her baby, and she can’t hear anything except the way he’s wailing, reaching out for her when he can’t see her with the spinal collar on
then it’s dana obscuring her vision, blurry and out of focus, but shaking her by her shoulders and telling her harshly, you gotta keep it together baran, we need to check him but we need him calm
and baran stumbles over, leans over just enough to be in his vision, smooths back his curls out of his eyes. i’m here, you’re okay, i know, i know, but we’re going to take care of you, i know it hurts, and her body seems to adjust through muscle memory alone to shift and move to allow the others to work around her
but then it’s donnie shouldering through the doors between the trauma rooms to plead to anyone that can hear, we could do with another set of hands in here
and she wants to snap when cassie glances up and then heads out, because this is baran’s son, why is she leaving
she can hear samira or maybe frank say something about how the head wound looks superficial, her little boy’s voice strained and still crying, asking her where’s trinity? i want trinity, she pushed me out of the way, is she okay?
and everyone’s heads snap towards the other trauma room as a collective, just in time to see the frantic rush of bodies, to see cassie begin compressions, and baran is moving too, is only stopped from fully entering when jesse steps in front of her, physically holds her back, she still can’t see trinity properly from this angle, can only see her feet, she’s lost a shoe, but recognises one of the battered pair of vans she refuses to throw away
can see the way yolanda barges through one of the doors too, the way all the life seems to drain out of her in an instant, as someone’s trying to shepherd her out too, and baran’s knees go out from beneath her
oh oh, thinking yolanda and baran having great, healthy relationships with their fathers. they each call them on father’s day and on holidays first things in the morning. baran calls her dad for advice while yolanda calls hers to complain about everything and anything. it doesn’t matter, both fathers will pick up the phone for their daughters.
meanwhile, Trinity hasn’t had her dad’s phone number in years. the last time he sent a birthday text was when she was 12 and he asked if she had any money she could loan him.
not too fond of fiona dourif (。 ˇ‸ˇ 。) unforch thats how it is sometimes (。 ˇ‸ˇ 。) using a sad face to express my disappointment about it (。 ˇ‸ˇ 。) fiona dourif i wish you didnt say you didnt think robby was just “like that” and wasnt sexist and people of his generation something that was kind of strange (。 ˇ‸ˇ 。)
hey, so is the pitt fandom going to finally understand why we were so worried about only woc getting written off, after seeing the emmy nominations? or are y'all going to tie yourselves into knots and claim that fiona, taylor, and gerran actually deserve those noms more.
and as for katherine's nomination, her son drugged and raped a child in 2012, and she still openly supports him <3
dont likethe word nuanced 👎yes i know it depends.everything depends. i just hate the word it sounds bad and also everybody is saying it and im certain some of them only just learned it which is okay!!!except theyre speaking like theyve known it forever 👎