Bumblebee7224

A sad little bumblebee that needs loving.

[bumblebee7224-blog]

Invisible.

There's a war in my mind A bloody battlefield The pain is overtaking No happiness to shield No blood or injuries to show It is all inside my head That's why no one believes me So there are more tears to shed People don't seem to try They don't try to understand But it's not something I can explain This is not what I planned You plan to be happy Plan to be free But then the pain takes over This isn't what I wanted to be The words of past friends They echo in my mind "You just need to be positive" As if happiness is easy to find This takes over my world This heartache can't be denied "This is who I am now" A fact I'm not going to hide Who knows what tomorrow will bring It cannot be predicted But one thing I know for sure I refuse to let my joy be restricted I lay my head on my pillow And again I've won the war I'm happy with who I am No matter what lays outside tomorrow's door.

[bumblebee7224-blog]

Writer's block.

I lack motivation. I struggle to shape words. No doubt this will be, The worst poem ever heard. This doubt in my heart. This emptiness in my mind. I have this feeling you don't love me. But perhaps I'm just blind. These words come from my mind, But not from my heart. There is no love in these lines. I've never been good at art.

[bumblebee7224-blog]

It Breaks Me.

It breaks me you know, Seeing you happy without me. After everything we promised, It’s painful to see you free.

The heartache didn’t catch you, The pain didn’t steal your joy. People tell me to move on “You’re a girl and he’s just a boy”

But to me you were so much more. My happiness, freedom and starlight. You meant the world to me. I would never have given up the fight.

Despite the pain, despite the tears, I would have stuck by you, No matter what you did to me. I would have loved you still, one of the few. ~Rachel

[bumblebee7224-blog]

White

It’s the crisp sound of stepping on ice. It’s the cold, fresh snow on your skin. It’s the damp breath that your warm body breathes into the cold air. It’s the smell of smoke from chimneys on the first cold night of winter.

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Black

It’s the feeling of a cold, empty night. It’s the colour of lonliness. The frustration and panic of unanswered questions. The disappointment of unfinished sentences. It’s the depth of the sky, aching with posibilities. It’s the feeling of failure. The feeling of regret. It’s the anger bubbling inside of you when the person you used to love has broken you once again. It’s the feeling in your heart when your parents are yelling again. It’s the feeling that you will never get away form this. The feeling that you will never achieve anything, never be proud of yourself. It’s the aching pain when the person you love is gone forever.

[bumblebee7224-blog]

Purple

It’s your friends lips when they bury their tear stained face into your chest. It’s the eggplants in your grandmother’s garden, her pride and joy. It’s the cold rush of pain in your body when you can’t carry on. It’s the colour of self-doubt, of wishing to do better. It’s the colour of the little aliens you used to draw as a child.

[bumblebee7224-blog]

Blue

It’s the coldness of my world after you left. It’s the feeling of your icy lips as we stand out in the night air. It’s the goosbumps on your cold skin all those times I gave you my coat. It’s the eery warmth of the bright sky before the storm comes. It’s the feeling of the first swim in Summer. The water on your skin.

[bumblebee7224-blog]

Green

It’s the feeling of crisp grass in the middle of Spring. It’s the smell of peppermint. The smell of frech air. It’s the warm wind in Summer blowing accross your face. It’s the smell of freshly mown grass, taking you back to your childhood. It’s your friend hiding in a bush when you play hide and go seek. It’s the snot running down the face of your little brother, crying because he got bullied at school. It’s the smell of fress pesto and basil coming from your grandmother’s kitchen.

[bumblebee7224-blog]

Yellow

It’s the feeling of happiness. The colour of the sun. It’s the feeling of hope, bubbling under the surface of your skin. It’s the sound of laughter and the feeling of joy. It’s the warmth of the summer sun dancing accross your bare skin.

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Orange

It’s the warmth of a fire on a cold winter night. It’s the dry, satisfying crunch of stepping on an Autumn leaf. It’s the feeling of doing something willingly without expecting anything in return. It’s the smile of a close friend. It’s the feeling you get falling asleep after a good day. It’s the colour of self acceptance, so comforting and warm. It’s the feeling of achievement.

[bumblebee7224-blog]

Red

It’s the anger rushing through your mind. It’s the smashing of glass and watching the shards draw warm blood from your cracked skin. It’s the feeling of her warm lips kissing your cheek after your date. It’s the warmth in her cheeks as she smiles at the ground after you called her beautiful. It’s the dry pain in your eyes in the morning after crying yourself to sleep. It’s the empowerment and heartbreak of passion and love.