uwu

•23• ✨feel free to ask me anything✨ *marilyn manson // juliet simms* 💕rupauls drag race💕

[nuderefsarebest]

[a-telos]

I literally screeched.

[terefah]

at least i'm not straight

[superscrungus-deactivated201910]

YAHOO

[musashi]

[Super Mario 2′s friendly chiptune melody playing]

Joel: You ready? I sure am. [selects Toad]

[Toad screams ‘YAHOO’ in a distorted, low-pitched, guttural hellspawn of a voice. Joel laughs so hard he’s wheezing. Every time Toad falls down a screen or performs any action, a more high pitched version of the Dreaded Yahoo emanates from the game, layering over the last in some kind of fucked up cacophony of disorder. A particularly shrill one sends Joel over the edge laughing again, and he pauses the game while he loses his shit laughing over the pause menu’s boppin’ music]

Joel: [crying] I’m sorry– [laughing more]

[rem4eva-2-deactivated20170129]

please take the time to watch this

[nightlustrous]

now we know how the real inspiration behind Super Toad 67 came to be.

[lmaonade]

brain: do you have your wallet?

me: *slaps my ass so hard everyone in the target can hear it*

me: yeah

[pochowek]

brain: do you have your wallet and your phone and your keys and your pocket knife and y-

me: *playing my ass and thighs like a bongo set at this point*

[retrowaifu]

My fav sex position is actually when I have feelings for someone and they have the same feelings for me too

[dyscomancer]

At this point there’s no excuse for a baby boomer to be technologically incompetent anymore. It’s just willful ignorance, this shit is not fucking hard

[dyscomancer]

“why is it asking for a password” because you’re logging into something martha, that’s how it’s been for the last 20 fucking years

“how do i do [x] can you show me” no dale you can Google it like the rest of us. it requires one exposure to the concept of googling to understand how it works. your generation was smart enough to cause a total economic collapse out of malice but not smart enough to type in a few words I guess

“im just not tech savvy” no you just refuse to learn because like in most things you are stuck in your ways

[dyscomancer]

the worst part is after you help an old fuck with some sort of tech bullshit 9 times out of 10 they’ll give you some kind of bullshit passive aggressive thank-you

like “oh i guess you young people have to know something about those phones you’re always on, huh?”

give me a fucking break gretchen i have depression from living in the economy you created and my phone is more of a reprieve than dealing with your stubborn inconsiderate ass

[dyscomancer]

AND ANOTHER THING that just gets my blood boiling is their ability to get into their settings, completely fuck things up, and then manage to develop total amnesia about how it happened

what do you mean you set your phone to japanese on accident, phil? there’s like 15 separate menus you have to navigate through to get there

“i think it’s because i got a virus” no greg it’s not a virus, the only viruses here are your rampant stupidity and the deadly pathogens carried by your unvaccinated grandchildren

[dyscomancer]

i just absolutely loathe that the people who decide if women should be executed for having abortions or not are the same people who can’t figure out how to work a blu-ray player with the instructions in front of them

[x-deer-teeth-x]

do you think you’d actually notice if someone didn’t cast a shadow? or if their limbs were just slightly too long? or if they had just a little too many teeth? like how many times have you passed Something on the street and you just didn’t Notice It

[tornpyre-deactivated20191208]

stay woke monsterfuckers ur love is out there!!!!!

[x-deer-teeth-x]

yknow what? not my point at all in any way whatsoever, but I’m glad I could be an inspiration

[mazapanbunni]

@verilymissvx ..

[teenagerposts]

me: *sees a bee* I respect you

bee: *starts flying toward me*

me: *runs away shrieking*

[babyanimalgifs]

This is so wholesome

[anx1ous-op0ssum]

Update: he finally got the cat to the vet to see if she had a microchip

[callmebliss]

I was already on board with his sweet wholesome open-to-love-and-nurturing heart but I was fully unprepared for getting to that last tweet and seeing how off the hook HOT dude is

[deadjosey-deactivated20200613]

https://twitter.com/pariszarcilla?lang=en heres his twitter is here there is also additonal cat photos of his children. 

[strangeracrossthestreet]

CAT DAD IS BACK

[jackslenderman]

aww, the kids grow up so fast. ;-;

[aquilacalvitium]

HHHHHHHH I LOVE CAT DAD!

[midgardian-april]

This is, by far, the single most adorable fucking thing I have ever seen. 

[geniusoflove]

no i cant FUCKING come into work right now im being goth. idiot.

[anti0ch]

in a swamp

[anti0ch]

or in a bog

[anti0ch]

there’s nothing finer

[anti0ch]

than a frog 🐸

[frogginbloggin]

in the mud

[frogginbloggin]

or by the road

[frogginbloggin]

there’s nothing slicker

[frogginbloggin]

than a toad!!

[nyanymous-deactivated20190713]

in a shoe

[nyanymous-deactivated20190713]

or in a boot

[nyanymous-deactivated20190713]

there’s nothing neater

[nyanymous-deactivated20190713]

than a newt!

[thresher-sharks]

in the moss

[thresher-sharks]

or in a pail

[thresher-sharks]

there’s nothing dearer

[thresher-sharks]

than a snail 🐌

[foxgirlmigraine]

@blujayonthewing @kinglesbiancore

[methargicismm]

Im sorry but she ra positively struck out on all my favorite tropes in one season.

Friends to Enemies?

Enemies to (possibly) lovers?

Big buff femme woman?

Small futch cat girl?

Mother and daughter relationship that isn’t good but also isn’t abusive?

Enemies to friends?

A friendly relationship between a guy and a girl that is physical but isn’t romantic?

Villains who can definitely be redeemed because of their backstories and just that their entire life sucked in general?

Like…

Yall can fight me, I love and would 100% die for this show.

[i-am-a-fish]

2019 is gonna be a slutty year I promise you

[raye-of-sunshine-42-deactivated]

2019 is gonna be an emo year what are you talking about

[i-am-a-fish]

why not both?? 2019 is gonna be a slutty emo year

[gaypeopletwitter]

[dyscomancer]

At this point there’s no excuse for a baby boomer to be technologically incompetent anymore. It’s just willful ignorance, this shit is not fucking hard

[dyscomancer]

“why is it asking for a password” because you’re logging into something martha, that’s how it’s been for the last 20 fucking years

“how do i do [x] can you show me” no dale you can Google it like the rest of us. it requires one exposure to the concept of googling to understand how it works. your generation was smart enough to cause a total economic collapse out of malice but not smart enough to type in a few words I guess

“im just not tech savvy” no you just refuse to learn because like in most things you are stuck in your ways

[dyscomancer]

the worst part is after you help an old fuck with some sort of tech bullshit 9 times out of 10 they’ll give you some kind of bullshit passive aggressive thank-you

like “oh i guess you young people have to know something about those phones you’re always on, huh?”

give me a fucking break gretchen i have depression from living in the economy you created and my phone is more of a reprieve than dealing with your stubborn inconsiderate ass

[dyscomancer]

AND ANOTHER THING that just gets my blood boiling is their ability to get into their settings, completely fuck things up, and then manage to develop total amnesia about how it happened

what do you mean you set your phone to japanese on accident, phil? there’s like 15 separate menus you have to navigate through to get there

“i think it’s because i got a virus” no greg it’s not a virus, the only viruses here are your rampant stupidity and the deadly pathogens carried by your unvaccinated grandchildren

[dyscomancer]

i just absolutely loathe that the people who decide if women should be executed for having abortions or not are the same people who can’t figure out how to work a blu-ray player with the instructions in front of them

[yvioddly]

valentina // all stars 4 ep.2

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

God I was at that restaurant in Annapolis yesterday that serves those 4 lbs milkshakes and these two dudes were just finishing one together and people were asking them for tips and they were like “you have to get like mint chocolate chip or something because if there’s no texture it gets too boring to finish” and all I could keep thinking was that it can only be a matter of time before some god wipes this town off the map and we will have earned it with our disgusting hubris

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

Everyone who has ever finished one of these will have it weighed against a feather when they die

[bearisthename]

Doable? Maybe

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

Listen. After the Burger Incident of 2016 I’ve learned to accept my fragile mortality and live within the boundaries set for humanity by the Universe.

[bearisthename]

I’m a little nervous but my curiosity is overwhelming~ what, pray tell, is the Burger incident of 2016?

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

In 2016 the day Pokémon Go came out I worked up a big appetite with my friends and we went to Steak ‘n Shake and I decided that none of the burgers looked big enough which…..I don’t know if I thought the photos on the menu were actual size I don’t know what was going on but

I asked the server for the biggest one they had and she said “that’s the 7x7, it’s not on the menu…you don’t want that”

And immediately my friends knew I was fucked because I felt challenged which I blame on my middle child syndrome and also on that I am by birth just an idiot so I ordered it without knowing competitive food bloggers write entire articles about this thing.

I sort of knew I was in trouble when the cook came to see who’d ordered it but I wasn’t backing down and in the end I ate all 1300 calories and THEN the fries and ALSO my shake and I had to go to my friend’s and take a three hour nap and when I woke up I was so fucked up that I just started eating leaves straight off her mint plant because antacids weren’t going to cut it.

Then I complained for like two days and Ultimately I learned absolutely nothing.

[sissy-butch]

In case anyone wanted a visual for the 7x7

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

Hubris

[dragonkingofthestars]

When you can’t decided between pride and gluttony so commit both sins at the same time.

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

This is the only comment allowed now