Trouble had always followed Deva. It was the only constant in his fast, rigorous and uncertain life. He’d faced it many times, head to head, fearless and strong as he battled it.
So trouble came again, and again.
Just as bull-headed and arrogant as Deva himself. So he wasn’t surprised when trouble showed up, again. It’s red eyes staring him down, but this time Deva sensed an unfamiliar fear around him. Why?
He wasn’t alone this time. There’s a warm hand that squeezes his gently. Brown eyes behind clear, square framed glasses peer up at him.
Confusion turns to awe, turns to love, turns to fear. Fear.
Deva reaches to grab his beloved but it’s too late. Trouble had taken his Das before Deva could protect him.
Das was falling now and all Deva could do was watch helplessly as he sank to his knees, his will falling at the same pace Das was.
Deva wakes with a start. His heart thuds at the bottom of his throat, the thin sheet of sweat on his forehead gleams reflecting the moonlight that lit their room. His heavy pants fade into the soft howling of the wind. His eyes wander to the left side of the bed, slowly, relief washing over him as they find Das snoring softly with his arms wrapped around a pillow. Deva huffs out the breath he was holding. He cannot take his eyes off Das, even as he sit up on the bed and takes off Das’s glasses, even as he reaches over to grab the other man’s bookmark and reaches over to the bedside table again to put the doctor’s book and glasses away. His Das was right there, right next to him.
His strength, his love, his patience were right next to him.
His peace was safe, lying next to him.
He watched on for a little longer, but the panic in his chest kept rising, ignoring the vows to protect that echoed in his heart.
Deva has to rip his eyes away, a heavy feeling sits atop his chest and his breaths become stuttered.
He needed air. Somehow he managed to make his way to the window, leaning against the open frame as his heavy limbs just slumped at his side. He shivers under the cool wind, taking deep breaths till they were stable again. The tears that well in his eyes fell freely for the first time in years, rolling down his cheeks and onto the windowsill as he leaned over it with another shaky breath.
“Deva?” Das’s sleepy voice called out from behind him, the older man quickly wipes away the tears as the doctor shuffles behind him. Deva can sense the worry that glazes Das’s expression as he catches a glimpse of Deva.
“Devu, are you okay? Em aindhi?” (What happened?) Two warm arms wraps themselves around Deva, one at his waist and another round his neck, pulling him as close to the other body as possible. Deva leans forward, pressing their foreheads together. Deva composes himself and Das waits patiently till Deva is ready.
“I love you” Deva mumbled. “Neku emaina aithe nenu thatkolenu.” (If anything happens to you, I won’t be able to bear it.)
“Naaku em aithadi Deva?” (What’ll happen to me Deva?) Das asks, prompting him to explain.
“Das, the things I did before you saved me will follow me everywhere, for the rest of my li-” Deva pauses to take a breath, his pattern losing its consistency for the second time that night. Das pulls back a little, worry graces his face again and he pulls up a chair, gently nudging his lover down till Deva was sat.
“Deva, emi avaledhu, nenu ikkade unanu.” (Deva, nothing’s happened, I’m right here.) Das sat on a stool next to Deva’s chair, watching and soothing Deva with soft words and rubbing his knuckles. Deva manages to even out his breathing again but he doesn’t realise the tears that begin to roll down his face till Das moves to wipe at them.
“Deva, you’ve left that life behind. Naaku emi avadhu, ipudu manam safe.” (Nothing will happen to me, now we are safe.)
“But-” Deva starts but can’t find the words to explain the millions of ‘what ifs’ running through this head.
“Devu, I love you. I know that you’re scared, I am too sometimes. Ippudu varaku emi avvaledhu. Kaani emana aithe mana degara move avadanki plan undhi. We’ll run far far away from here and start afresh.” (Nothing’s happened till now. But if anything does happen we have a plan.) Das calmly reminded him, Deva nodded, remembering the heavy conversation they had. He hummed, completely hating the fact that he had put the angel of a person standing in front of him in potential danger.
“Dasu, bangaram ikkada raa.” (Das, bangaram [gold in telugu] come here.) Deva pulled Das onto his lap, wrapping his arms around the young doctor and nesting his head into his neck. “Oka peedakala ochindi.” (I had a bad dream.) Deva reveals hesitantly. Das strokes his hair.
“Hmm, kalla lo emi aindhi?” (Hmm, what happened in the dream?) Das asks.
“Naa valla nuvu,” (Because of me, you,) Deva trails off, physically unable to finish the sentence but Das understood enough to see where it was going. Kissing the top of Deva’s hair as he rubbed circles into his shoulder and Deval pulled him closer, holding him as tightly as possibly.
“Naaku emi avadhu. That life is behind us and you’ve taught me enough for me to protect myself. And don’t worry we have police connections too, I’m sure Pooja would help us.” (Nothing will happen to me) Das tries to joke, immediately smiling as Deva chuckles into his neck. “Deva? Let’s go back to sleep?” Das asks, knowing the both of them had busy days the day before and were going to be even busier the next. Deva nods and Das is about to slide off his lap before Deva stops him.
“Aagu!” (Stop!) And without warning Deva picks Das up bridal style, placing him gently down on the before climbing in next to him. Deva buries his head into Das’s chest and snuggles closer as the doctor wraps his arms around him, assuring him of his presence.
@rasnak2 and @tulodiscord thank you so much for supporting me and bearing with my constant complaining and proofreading everything i write ever for me! You guys are the best!
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