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@butch-lesboy
Sun + Moon Bi Lesbian flag! ☀️🌙
lesbian related discourse tires me out sm. first it was aro/ace lesbians then it was nonbinary lesbians then it was he/him lesbians and it/its lesbians and now its bi/pan/mspec lesbians like when are all of you going to realize that the lesbian experience is extremely diverse and has never been as strict as "women who only identify as women who love exclusively women who only identify as women". like this goes for many identities but lesbians end up at the forefront a lot and it makes me wonder if any of you actually give a shit about queer history because istg lesbian separatism has been reinvented like 50 times in the past decade.
stop convincing each other that the queer experience is nothing but strictly defined boxes and labels that can always be condensed into one sentence. lesbians can experience a lack of sexual attraction and a lack of romantic attraction and lesbians can be nonbinary and lesbians can be gnc and when you actually go into what those last two mean you should realize that yes this means sometimes lesbians are men because genderfluid and bigender and trigender and transmasc and whatever gender lesbians exist and when you actually goes into what THAT means you should realize yes actually people combining labels like mspec and lesbian makes perfect sense because of fucking course orientation and gender and whatever else you consider to be apart of your queer experience is all fluid its all up to personal interpretation
its not shit like bi lesbians or mogai or aroace people or gnc people or "trenders" or it/its users or whatever fucking bonafide weirdos that are ruining the community its the people who want to sort everyone into neat little boxes because they cant handle that sometimes you arent going to understand other peoples experiences. its fine if mspec lesbians dont make sense to you. its fine if it doesnt make sense to you how someone could use it/its, if it doesnt make sense how a lesbian could consider himself transmasc, if it doesnt make sense how someone could seriously mean "my gender feels like a star", if whatever queer experience you run into doesnt make sense.
someone's identity does not have to make sense for you to respect them as a person and realize that exclusionary behavior is nothing but a crabs in a bucket type mentality. not only have "weird" queer people existed since fucking forever, but even if they didnt the human experience is diverse and we still dont know everything about the world and why the fuck would you decide that no actually if it cant be understood it must be bad and you need to find out reasons for it to be bad. focus on the people who are actively hurting others, taking advantage of vulnerable people, dont become one of them. dont become one of the people who scorns anything they dont understand and hurts innocent people in the quest of getting rid of anyone who they deem is abnormal. its fucked up and being any type of exclusionist is fucked up.
bi lesbians, as an overall community, is just a bunch of people who decided that a complicated label fits their complicated attraction and thats Fine. it is literally fine. being a lesbian was never about being strictly a woman who strictly loves other women who are strictly women. its about loving women in a gay/queer way, whatever that means for the individual. if an individual person is using it in a transphobic way, then thats a fault of the person, not the label. but at its core, all the identity is about is about recognizing that attraction is complicated and identity is complicated and not everyone is comfortable putting themself in neat boxes for other people to scrutinize until they Get It.
to any mspec lesbians (and hell, any mspec gays) who are reading this: im proud of you and theres nothing wrong with recognizing that your identity is complicated and maybe even contradictory. its Your experiences and no one has the right to say that youre inherently a bad person simply because they heard some strawman arguments and decided to believe in fallacy over reality. and because its probably obvious why im making this yeah maia arson crimew is literally fine its an absolute legend actually and i hope that its okay. fuck anyone who was a piece of shit to it because they cant handle someone being openly complicated and contradictory and unabashedly "Weird"
Genuine question about your bi lesbian post (I checked the tag for explainations and yours was one that came up), one of the bigger confusions for me with the mspec lesbian label is: what is a lesbian then? Ive heard it re-defined "queer attraction to women" but thats also for example what bisexual women have. Lesbianism centers women and its the only sexuality that doesnt include men. I dont see why lesbians cant just have our own label for our own sexuality? If we decide lesbianism includes men we wont even have a label for that shared experience anymore.
i think the thing is, is a lot of exclusionists are coming at this from the wrong direction. so much of the language used to argue against mspec lesbians is binarist to the extreme, which is extremely frustrating when what we're talking about is a non-binary identity.
lesbianism has always included nonbinary people, and bisexuals, and gender nonconformists, and trans people, and aspecs, and men, and genderqueers, and mspec people of all kinds! we didn't always have the language, but if you know what to look for you'll see we were ALWAYS there.
but then the second wave of feminism hit, and with it came a lot of very loud upper-middle class white women's opinions. political lesbianism became a thing, and lesbian separatism, and suddenly it wasn't enough to just love women anymore. in fact, under political lesbian ideology, queer love for women didn't factor in at all.
men were evil. men were inherently oppressors. men were sexually depraved animals that would ruin anything they touched. attraction under this ideology was an ethical choice. any woman who chose to align herself with a man was a traitor to the cause, and a victim of the patriarchy, and impure.
if that terminology sounds familiar, you're right, it is! this was the birth of radical feminism, and with it came proto-TERFism.
now, please take a moment to consider why it became so important to center the exclusion of "men" in the definition of lesbianism. think about why a binary of "okay" and "not okay" genders would be encouraged, and who would benefit from their segregation.
all that said, i'll address your concerns point by point
one of the bigger confusions for me with the mspec lesbian label is: what is a lesbian then?
the answer is the same as any queer identity. it's up to personal interpretation. lesbian is a word that someone chooses to express theirself, to explain their identity, and to help find community where they belong.
in my opinion, and how i define lesbian for personal use: a lesbian is someone who experiences queer attraction to women, and prioritizes that attraction when seeking relationships.
but if a lesbian defines their personal experience with lesbianism around their lack of attraction to men, that's cool! it's their identity, and they're the only one who can decide how to relate that to the real world.
the not cool part is when a singular experience is generalized, and touted as universal.
There Is No Universal Experience. the way you feel is not going to be exactly identical to everyone else.
Ive heard [lesbian] re-defined "queer attraction to women" but thats also for example what bisexual women have.
this seems to be a shocking statement to a lot of exclusionists. but. having things in common with other queer people is a good thing. yes, correct, bisexual women experience queer attraction to women. and they have personal reasons why they don't identify with lesbianism, just like you (i assume) have personal reasons why you don't identify with mspec labels. some people have personal reasons why they identify with multiple labels. and it's not our business to pry into anyone's private life!
also, as an aside bc it feels like a lot of people forget this: a bi woman's queer attraction to women is not lesser than a lesbian woman's. bisexuals and lesbians are equally queer. bi women and lesbian women have valuable shared experiences, including and not limited to their love for women, and the history of their communities.
Lesbianism centers women and its the only sexuality that doesnt include men.
it is not the only sexuality that doesn't include men. ceterosexual. finsexual. enbian. neptunic. nominsexual. womasexual. hell, even bisexual doesn't have to include men! i could go on and on and on, but my point is made.
if you don't want to use a different label when you already identify with lesbianism so strongly, well... huh. i wonder who else feels that way 🤔
I dont see why lesbians cant just have our own label for our own sexuality?
this is a bad argument, and my absolute least favorite phrase to hear in a conversation about inclusivity. i will not give a question asked in such bad faith the dignity of a real response.
If we decide lesbianism includes men we wont even have a label for that shared experience anymore.
again, we're not ~deciding~ that lesbianism includes men. multigender, genderfluid, nonbinary, butch, and otherwise genderqueer lesbians have always existed. it's transphobic revisionism to say that they didn't, to pretend this is a new concept.
parting statements
1) there are always reasons why a person connects with a label. when it comes to queer identity, a lot of people think long and hard about it. we're talking hours upon hours of introspection- weeks, years even. if someone identifies in a way you don't understand, it's not your business to question them. they've thought about their experience more than you ever could.
2) because this is a big argument that gets thrown around: we are not going to force you to fuck men. we are not going to force you to fuck us. if you are not attracted to men, and/or you don't want to be in a relationship with someone who could be, then walk away from them. that's literally all it takes.
3) the acknowledgement and acceptance of mspec lesbians Does Not suggest or encourage the normalization of corrective rape, conversion therapy, or lesbophobic harassment. it does not contribute to lesbian erasure, as that is a problem with public representation and historical accounts, Not a matter of personal identity.
if you have any other questions, or if you want someone else's perspective, @mogai-sunflowers is another good person good to talk to! just please be respectful 💖
as a lesbian, one of the most damaging things t*rfs have done to the lesbian community is make the centre of our sexuality our lack of attraction to men rather than our attraction to women.
that’s why they demonise bi women as much as they do. when yes, bi women have a bit of a different experience but they have a lot of experience in common with us too and the fact they are attracted to women in common with us.
bi women are not our enemy.
Homoflexible and Heteroflexible Flag Edits/Redesigns
Okay, so I looooooove the idea of the Homoflexible and Heteroflexible flags made by @bi-lesbian (Follow their blog and Support them for the positivity they spread and the wonderful flags they’ve made!), So I decided to have a go at creating simplified/alternate versions of the flags, and also adding a few specification flags!
I hope that some people will find these flags to be useful for themselves/their projects!
Homoflexible
Heteroflexible
Homoflexible Lesbian/Sapphic
Heteroflexible Lesbian/Sapphic
Homoflexible Vincian/Turian/Achillean
Heteroflexible Vincian/Turian/Achillean
Homoflexible/Heteroflexible Solidarity
queer as in fuck you. queer as in i have always been here and i am not going away. queer as in community unity. queer as in i will not be made compliant. queer as in revolutionary acceptance. queer as in uncompromising pride. queer as in fuck you.
Butch Lesbian + Butchgender =
(Please read pinned post before interacting! <3)
Fun fact straight and LGBTQ+ are not mutually exclusive categories this has been a psa
you aren't really supportive of gender fuckery and gender weirdness if you can't accept that sometimes men will be lesbians and sometimes women will be gay guys and sometimes the lesbian guy and gay guy who's also a woman are the same person. if the only gender fuckery you support is identities that make sense to you, then dare i say that is not real support.
To be honest I think a lot of the pointless lgbt discourse on here would be resolved if people learned “Some people will have identities I don’t understand, and that is ok as I am not meant to understand everything” and “just because I don’t understand someone’s identity doesn’t mean it’s bad.” Like chill out man it’s not that deep there are better things to direct your anger and time towards. Let’s get high together I can show you the wonders of the world
“if you can be a lesbian, what word do we get to use to indicate we’re attracted to only women and not men?”
homosexual.
homosexual has always meant exactly that. you want to specify you’re a woman? homosexual woman, homosexual sapphic, homosexual lesbian.
(or homoromantic, etc.)
hell, you could even call yourself ‘homosexuelle’ (’elle’ meaning ‘she’), like some bi feminists are doing for ourselves!
lesbian simply means being a woman who loves women. no more specifications than that. this definition goes back many decades before the internet was a thing.
‘homo’ implies exclusive attraction; ‘lesbian’ doesn’t.
and remember, just because bisexual women call themselves lesbians, doesn’t mean you can’t. our ideas of lesbianism in orientation are not mutually exclusive.
☀🌙 Sun + Moon Bi Lesbian + Bi Gay ⭐🌠
✨ ۪ ۫ ੭ – Aesthetic flags for bi lesbians and bi gays who feel connected to the sun or moon, feel like their aesthetic is tied to the sun or moon, or can be simply used as fun descriptors. These can also be used as general sun/moon mspec lesbian/gay flags if so wished.
In order: sun bilesb | moon bilesb sun bigay | moon bigay
DNI banner transcript: Basic DNI (racist, ableist, queerphobic). This blog is radinclus, pro-endo, against transrace and transabled, anti-contact and anti-harassment. If you don’t like that, block and move on.
DNI if:
-You have a long DNI listing which kind of lgbt people you do and don't find 'acceptable' because you don't get to decide which labels are and aren't 'valid'
#%.BUTCH . FUTCH . FEMME BILESBIAN ‹ ꜝ
infos && images ids under the cut!
the number of people i've seen with both 'exclusionists DNI' and 'bi/pan lesbians DNI'... pleeease tell me you hear yourselves and then please tell me why it's different when these people who have a complex relationship with sexuality are worthy of your hatred.
the first lesbian i ever knew irl when i was younger was my moms friend who was an ftm lesbian, who did not identify as a woman in any way but fully identified as a lesbian, and was in a triad with two women who fully accepted him for who he was.
we have been around for a long time, and will continue to be here long after you immature box obsessed baby queers have burned out. being a lesbian is about loving women and being queer, if you can't understand that congratulations on drinking the terf juice.
also its okay to be wrong as long as you don't fucking double down when confronted with the facts like. if you see this post and want to actually interact in good faith with bi or mspec lesbians and lesbians who dont identify as women or "woman-lite", then please do! that's the mature response!
i just want yall to look inside yourselves and really try to figure out why you feel like you should have control over how other people identify. thats the opposite of what being queer means, and i'm not even angry at people who think this way it legitimately just makes me sad?
Repost of a request, got accidentally deleted (The Rose Red Bi-Lesbian and Blue Rose Bi-Lesbian)
I accidentally deleted a request (The two bi-lesbian flags I got requested for) from a fellow Anon and I'm just reposting it since I was being clumsy and I wasn't paying attention in the earlier hours of the morning. My attempt to edit the og post to give it more definition led me to delete it unconsciously. Probably the only benefit of it is the fact I get to remake the post fresh and clean with actual meaning and maybe changed definition to make it easier to understand and differentiate from the regular Bi-Lesbian meanings. As always, most of my Mspec-Lesbian flags are based on bi-lesbian's, please show them some love for that inspiration.