The treatment of Eleven from Byler shippers is problematic
It's no doubt that Byler is one if the most popular ships in the stranger things fandom, with so many people that were rooting for it to become canon in season 5. However, in order for Byler to happen, El and Mike needed to break up.
Now, I've never shipped Byler before, BUT Eleven is one of my favorites in the show, and I've always rooted for her to have her happy ending with Mike. The treatment towards El's character is really concerning to me, and obviously, it is not all Byler fans, but it is enough for it to be almost the entire fan base.
A main argument that people use to oppose Mileven is that Mike and El got together when she could "barely speak and understand anything" and because of that she was practically forced into a relationship with Mike without knowing what a relationship was. People furthermore say that Mike and El should have broken up so that El could become independent and find herself. First of all, I think we should address why Eleven is the way she is. We know from season 4 that her struggle with speech and identifying certain things, relationships, people, etc, is not because Dr Brenner and the people in the lab did not teach her, but because of her intense PTSD from the incident with One. In season 4, when we see Eleven go back into her memories and mimic her child self, she is talking perfectly. Eleven also, despite learning how to speak and interact with others again, is somewhat knowledgeable and mature. She realizes that she was in danger the moment she escaped–hell she was smart enough to escape a facility like that. She acknowledges that she could get others in trouble too, which we see with Benny, and when she tells Mike that the 'bad men' are after her. However, before the kiss scene in S1, El does not know what a boyfriend is, which is realistic because I doubt that the people in a lab that intended to keep you there forever were gonna tell her what a boyfriend or girlfriend is. So when Bylers still use the reason above as to why El shouldn't be in a relationship with Mike, it feels infantilizing and ableist.
Eleven has had three character arcs where she is infact separated from Mike— season 2, where she goes to find her mom, and then Kali, season 3 where she discovers her style as a girl with the help of Max, and finally season 4 where El goes back to the lab due to her fear of being a monster. She has been separated from Mike 3 TIMES, where she has made independent decisions and discovered herself. Why do you want her to break up with Mike then?? And even if these characters' arcs did not happen, El should be allowed to find herself and have a boyfriend. You don't have to have one or the other. In fact, Mike has always helped El in her journey of self-discovery, and El has helped him.
I feel like these takes, despite it coming from those who claim they love El, have become borderline misogynistic and ableist. It's okay to like a ship, but to claim mileven is toxic and then provide evidence that is based in demeaning Eleven is not right.
2087
stormborns
theartofmadeline
izzy806
jacobvanloon
dededos
