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One Nice Bug Per Day

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Cosimo Galluzzi
we're not kids anymore.
occasionally subtle

oozey mess

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AnasAbdin

@theartofmadeline

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Aqua Utopiaïœæ”·ăźćșă§èšæ¶ă玥ă
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titsay

Love Begins
almost home
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
$LAYYYTER
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@butmarauders
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#whenmagicgoeswrong
âHeâs not your son,â said Sirius quietly.
âHeâs as good as,â said Mrs. Weasley fiercely.
Iâm reading up on chocolate frog cards in the Harry Potter universe, for reasons, and-
âCame up with the ever changing floor plan.âÂ
Really, Ravenclaw? Really?
âYou know what this school needs? To not make any sense-â
âRowena, I donât think-â
âExactly, you donât think. Iâm brilliant and this is perfect. Moving staircases, walls that think theyâre doors-â
âBut how will the students get to class?â
âTheyâll have to figure it out.â
ââŠâ
âEveryday. They will figure it out everyday. My students will live in a tower and navigate these stairs every time.â
âThe stairs move! This doesnât seem safeâŠI think Iâll put my common room in the basement, Rowena.â
âDitto. I think the dungeons would be saferâŠâ
ââŠMy kids will brave these stairs. Iâll take the other tower.â
#Rowena snipes that âcunningâ means Salazarâs students should be able to handle the moving architecture#Salazar snipes back that âcunningâ means knowing when and how to avoid unnecessary bullshit#meanwhile Godric is just yelling PARKOUR! and Rowena is all Thatâs Not What I Meant#Helga would like her students to make it to class on time and without any broken bones#ninety percent of the reliable secret passages were a team effort by Helga and one of the others#to make sure the house elves could get around all right (via @mzminola)
#i feel like the collaboration was probably hufflepuff and slytherin#in the only time they ever worked together#helga: students and house elves can move safely!#salazar: more places to hide snakes#salazar is like we should make these accessible to people with no legs#helga is like i mean i agree but why are you being so nice about this#salazar is like no reason hey Iâm just gonna make some of these rely on snake language for fun#do you think a fifty foot snake would fit in this passage asking for a friend (via @dinosauriaawesome)
iâm literally crying this is 100% what happened
(hey tumblr please donât delete the previous peopleâs comments like you did the last time i added someoneâs tags to a post mmkay)
No but thatâs actually so clever okay like the people who live in the castle would get a general idea of the patterns and how to move around efficiently but like for anyone planning on attacking it would be impossible to infiltrate like how the hell do I attack the headmaster when I canât even find the bathroom why the fuck am I in a chemistry supply closet okay these stairs went to the main hall but now Iâm on my way to the broom closets holy fucking shit fuck leonard SAID the dorm was on the left of the three headed hippogriff but Iâm here and itâs just a painting of a man with a donkey face is this a fucikgin joke leonard do you think this is funny because itâsnot. its not okay siri how the hell do i get to the nearest anything âhere is: the nearest paintingâ like fuck you siriÂ
actually considering all this, the changing floorplan probably worked exactly as designed when it came to the battle of hogwarts in the late 90âČs. the invasion was towards the end of the term, so the students, especially the renegade students in hiding, had the full term to master getting around the school quickly, quietly, and efficiently. the invading deatheaters were generally their parentsâs ages, and hadnât been back to hogwarts in several decades, if theyâd even attended at all. so, while the adult invaders easily outmatched the adolescent defenders in strength and skill, hogwarts was a lethal maze to the deatheaters, while it was home to the kids.Â
rowena knew what the fuck she was doing.Â
The only time slytherin and hufflepuff worked together my ass. They were best friends.
Sit down, everybody, sit down. Thatâs it. Now, presents. And a nice big box for Ron.
hermione punching malfoy in the face is still one of the most satisfying three seconds of cinema history. i like to think she went with the time travel plan just so she could watch it for a second time
Dear Augusta,
I realize you are still annoyed with me for persuading young Neville to leave behind his Auror training and take up a position as Pomonaâs research and teaching assistant, apprentice, and eventual successor. I believe the terms you used were âencouraging him to waste his potential and settle for mediocrity.â I will pass over the implied insult to my chosen profession, here, in favor of telling you instead about an incident that took place at the beginning of the year, which will hopefully clarify to you just why I believe your grandson to be not only a useful, but an essential addition to the Hogwarts faculty.
Professor Viktor Krum, whom you may remember has been hired to teach DADA this year due to a shortage of British wizards wishing to take on that position, was having distinct difficulties with one of his second-year students, a young Ravenclaw boy. It is not that the student wished to be difficult - he is a sweet child, normally quite cooperative and eager to please - but he had been a particular target of the Carrows last year, and he was having panic attacks that kept him from even approaching the DADA room. He ended up huddled on the floor across from the room, shaking and flinching every time Viktor tried to speak with him. Now, Viktor is a kindly young man who is more accustomed to being pestered for autographs than to seeing a child cringe in terror at his approach, and he was quite disturbed. Naturally, he went looking for Poppy, who at that point was conferring with Pomona about various herbs she required for her treatments, and requested assistance. Neville was working nearby, and upon hearing the childâs name, looked up and said, âLet me try.â
He knelt down next to the boy, and asked, âDo you remember me?â The child looked up, and it was as if the fear left him in a breath.
âYouâre the Gryffindor, youâre the one who stood up to them. You took a Cruciatus for me.â
âI did, and Iâd do it again. Come in with me. Iâll sit with you. I wonât let anyone hurt you again, I promise. And Viktor wonât, heâs not like them. I know him, heâs a good man.â
The boy nodded, took his hand, and Neville sat with him throughout that class and every DADA class after that for weeks, until he decided he was ready to do it on his own. And that boy wasnât the only one - when your grandson walked into that class, every second-year in the room, nearly in unison, breathed a sigh of relief. They knew they were safe with him.
Augusta, dear, you should know your own boy better by now. Neville is not capable of mediocrity - there are many ways to be great, and he will find one of them whatever path in life he chooses. Frank and Alice were Gryffindors to the bone, and so are you, and so am I - but only your grandson is the Gryffindor to the younger students of Hogwarts. To us, he is a young man to be proud of - to them, he is a legend.
Yours truly,
Minerva
[Addendum: Viktor Krum teaches his class about boggarts a year before they normally do at Hogwarts - at Durmstrang they believe in facing oneâs fears early - so Neville is present for that class. The next morning, Pomona Sprout finds fresh flowers, sunflower and agrimony, on Remus Lupinâs grave.]
[Addendum 2: one of the Ravenclaws makes a snide remark about Hufflepuff brains, only to be greeted by a glare from Neville and a quiet, but stern, âDonât you talk about my girlfriendâs House that way.â The boy ducks his head, shamefaced, and says, âNo, sir, sorry, sir, I wonât do it again.â No Ravenclaw of that year speaks ill of a Hufflepuff ever again.][Or perhaps Neville just says, in quiet, deadly calm, âYou do realize that both my mentor and my girlfriend are Hufflepuffs?â]
Weâve got one thing that Voldemort doesnât have. Something worth fighting for.
Shoutout to Percy Jackson for being a kids book that straight up murdered the abusive step dad instead of doing some bullshit redemption arc where they have to forgive him
iâve put on the first harry potter movie to keep me company while i draw, and can i just say: the way that harry+co immediately jump to suspecting snape of Nefarious Evildoings simply because heâs kind of a dick will never not be funny to me. they donât even know he used to be a death eater at this point. they know literally NOTHING about him theyâre just like âwell he was mean to me in class the other day, so heâs probably a spy for voldemortâ âyeah that seems legit. letâs set him on fireâÂ
Harry+co: the vibes on this man⊠disgustingâŠ
you know, itâs not that hard being the brightest witch of your age when that age is eleven
snape: what is this
harry: you said to make a potion of swiftness
snape: and what have you done
harry: poured twelve cans of red bull into the cauldron
ron: same thing, innit?
snape: get out of my classroom
not to be all âtw*light did nothing wrongâ but misogyny honest to god killed the hunger games
it was no masterpiece sure but it also sure as hell wasnt the love triangle bullshit everyone made it out to be. seriously everyone blames this whole âYA fiction with the special One and teens overthrowing the oppressive government tropesâ trend on the hunger games but the truth is that none of those books are anything like thg
god!!! im mad!! name one cliche YA novel where the government actually is BAD like not just âoh love is illegalâ or âthey barcode you!!uwuâ instead of like. actual slavery and rampant poverty while the rich waste their money on dumb bullshit!! and name one main character who ACTUALLY suffers under the governmentâs regime!! who actually starves and works and suffers and has genuine REASON to rebel!! thg is the only YA book that had anything to say about wealth disparity and the dehumanization of the poor,, every other YA book uses it as a plot device to put some dumbass romance together or show how âbadassâ the MC is!! thg is genuinely emotional and the focus of the book isnt katnissâs archery and how cool she is and its NOT gale or fucking peeta bread. and then the marketing for the stupid fucking movies took the WHOLE POINT OF THE BOOK (which is to satirize and critique how women in entertainment have any serious things about them ignored in favor of whatever dress theyre wearing or who theyâre dating) and turns that intoâŠâŠâŠ.. a fucking love triangle. and then the world forgets it because its just another dumb teen girl series. okay.Â
Me @ myself rn
oh also last thing. the fact that at the end katniss chose to kill Coin (the rebel leader/soon to be newest dictator) instead of just having a plain and simple boring happy ending shows just how different thg is from the YA fiction its compared to. no other book in this genre would have the guts (or even the idea) to put out such a blatant, obvious âthe fight against oppression never ends, stay diligentâ message and thg is iconic for it and it shows how much thought was actually put into its message. im sorry to susan collins for my 12 yo self for not understanding at the time and thinking it was just bad writing
thanks to everyone adding on about the representation! about finnickâs story and being trafficked! and about peeta and his disability!! and katniss and her indigenous coding and PTSD!! And about how it shows how war n dictatorships always prey on marginalized groups!! and a billion other things!!! that the movies just fucked off n forgot about!!!