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@byebyenicotine
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Read of listen for free to it at medium.com/mdabdoubl
Read writing from BATSHIT CRAZY on Medium. Hi, I’m Marina Dabdoub and this is my online screen novel project 🦇 💩 😜. It’s a silly love story
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My online screen novel project has been updated. In case you want something to read instead of dwelling about your life. Here is the link. You don’t have to download the app, but I would appreciate if you download it (it has a free version) and followed me. But you can also read or listen to it on a web browser. The link is https://mdabdoubl.medium.com
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Please read my online screen book.
BATSHIT CRAZY
by Marina Dabdoub
I’m positing it as I write it in real time.
twitter: @byebyenicotine
https://medium.com/@mdabdoubl
Read writing from BATSHIT CRAZY on Medium. Hi, my name is Marina Dabdoub and this is my online screen novel project. It’s a sweet silly love
Many people hold the belief that substance abuse is a choice, not a medical condition. People with addictions face criticism and are often seen as reckless, irresponsible, and of less value as those who do not face this predicament. People believe this mainly because “when a health condition is thought to derive from bad behavior, a character flaw, or moral deficit, it produces a markedly different reaction than when is thought to derive from a genetic predisposition, neurological disorder, or a medical disease.” (Richter, Linda and Susan E. Foster, 2014, p. 62) The myth that addiction is a choice creates a misconception that “all addicts” are in control of their predicament; they chose their own fate and now is their problem. Are they failing us because of their “poor decisions”? Or are we failing them because we are perpetuating a myth without scientific exploration?
All of our existence is based on nature. Relating this to what goes through our body when we are addicted to a toxic substance as drugs or alcohol. According to scientific research “supports that some individuals may have a predisposition toward physiological dependence to certain substances, such as alcohol, opioids, cocaine and nicotine.” (Brym, Robert and John Lie, 2018, p. 108). In order to understand us we need to understand our nature. Our brain and bodies, under the influence of stupefactives, undergo a physical change that makes them a slave of that addiction, making our prefrontal cortex thinking it does not have a choice. There is a disorder of choice, we know is corrupting our minds and bodies but we are unable to make a better choice, or at least it seems so. Not all people have addictions to drugs and/or alcohol, so is still a choice? Or a failure of society as a whole?
“Social-cognitive theorists: suggest that people often try alcohol and tranquilizers such as Valium (generic name is diazepam) on the basis of recommendation of observation of others. Expectations about the effects of a substance predicts it use.” (Brym, Robert and John Lie, 2018 p.108) In other words, we are conditioned by those around us. In certain communities the use of drugs and alcohol is not stigmatized and certain behaviors are normalized even when we hold the information that is harmful for us. A clear example of this is, even though we are talking about nicotine in this case, is France. Lung cancer is the fourth leading cause of death according to the Institute for Health Metrics and Evaluation (IHME) (http://www.healthdata.org/france). Some friends of mine that were in Paris said to me that walking through the city was like walking through a clouds of cigarettes smoke.
Another cause of addiction may very well be the self-fulfilling prophecy, “which holds that situations that we define as real become real in their consequences.” (Brym, Robert and John Lie, 2018 p. 57) This hits very close to home because I, as part of the First Nation community have endured the expectancy that we as a race tend to have problems with addictions, especially alcoholism. Talking to some of my native friends about if we all concluded that yes, there is a problem in our community with them, could it be that a generalized opinion in Canada that we tend to and so we do. Adding to this that I just wrote about is Bandura’s Theory of Social Learning in which proposes that what children see, children do. One of my native friends told me that not only does she knows many addicts in her reserve but had family members that were on the business of drugs.
As we can see there are many underlying factors that can impact a person’s vulnerability to addictions. First, there is that scientific research has proven that they alter our brain function and our ability to take reasonable and adequate choices. We also saw that normalizing the behavior and seeing it as just a bad habit can create addictions because we are all aware that these can be mortal. Finally I reflected on my peers lives and mine based on the self-fulfilling prophecy. Because of all these reasons I can firmly state that although there is free will in all of us, some of us, are more subject to be susceptible to fall into the dark deeps of addictions.
first encounters 🛸 #ChatGPT
a dreamer named
gary enters the scene
#BATSHITCRAZY
Grace is a young adult that suffers sleep paralysis disorder. It is weird. Sometimes at 3 am she wakes up unable to move or speak, feeling a huge weight on her body from her toes to her face. This usually lasts for a minute but it feels longer. She is awake but she can’t move her fingers, or even shout for someone to wake her up. It’s random. It doesn’t happen every day, or every year, but when it happens is for a couple of nights. As soon as she has one, the next day fears to fall asleep.
🦇 💩 😜
BAT SHIT CRAZY
The Director’s Girlfriend Cut
Grace opens a new browser in the desktop computer at the reception. She types Craigslist, clicks on casual encounters and posts an ad. She giggles as she types “Lamb in search for a lion.” And on the message writes: Looking for a play date for naked twister. No creeps. Hits send and hears a loud motor near by. Then the steps of someone. A biker comes swinging a large gun and wearing a dodgers baseball cap. He asks her: “Where is the slut?” Grace did nothing but answer: “Room 13.” It was the only room occupied. She didn’t know if the woman that check in earlier was his wife, but she wasn’t going to compromise her well-being; after all, he looked like and acted like a temperamental caveman with a huge gun. She just answer the truth: “Room 13.” Grace is smart like that.
The guy who looks like the gang leaders of the Hell Angels, walks to the room abruptly stops at Room 13, lights-up a cigarette and kicks the door down. Sees his wife, a 30 something blonde amazonian woman in four with a 60 year old has been weightlifter. The biker points the gun and says: “Lift this.” The wife whins and says: “Fuck! Why do you have to be so dramatic?”. He responds: “Are you coming home, baby? The biker and his wife and leave the motel and get on the truck and pass by a white 1995 White Marquis.
In the reception Grace is calling 911 as she is counting the money that she just took from the dead guy in room 13. She liked money, easy money, especially the money she can get of silly old creeps.
Grace: “Hi, there is a dead body, in room 13 at the HeartBreak hotel.” Looks up and sees a man all dress in black. He has style, and everything he is wearing seems expensive. Grace tries to hide the cash in the drawer hoping the guy didn’t see it but it was too late, Gary knows how to pay attention.
He is tall and slender, has wrinkles around his eyes and long curly blond hair. She hangs up the phone and asks him: “Are you Gary, the one that booked the meeting room for this weekend?”. The Heartbreak motel had a quasi “convention center”. In reality it used to be the cafeteria but it never had any clients. No one was at that motel to have a coffee and a club sandwich. The regular clients were close to broke families that wanted to take their kids to Disneyland but couldn’t afford it. And trailer drivers that had long routes and needed a rest on their way for deliveries. And of course people that pay the night only to use it for a couple of hours to do “the dirty”.
Gary: “Yes, that’s me (looks at her name tag) Grace. I’m Gary. Looks confused and guesses right: “Did someone died, Grace?”
Grace: “Yes, I just called the police. Your room is ready, it’s the biggest one we have room 23” and hands him the key. Gary was the only guy that called to reserve a room that day and asked about the “convention center.” He need it for a new business that had to do with the oldest profesión but it was going to upload for millions of people to see. You can guess exactly what was he about.
Gary was born a hustler, but word got around when he started ripping his investors, gambling all the money and moving from town to town. Gary had just enough money to start another shady business. Now he wanted to reclute beautiful young ladies and he knew the most beautiful ones ended up in Los Ángeles. Because he was low in funds he booked it in Anaheim, where this story takes place.
Gary grabs the key and starts walking to his room and turned to Grace and asks her: “Are you going to be here for the weekend, Grace?” Gary does that with women that finds attractive saying their name in almost every sentence.
Grace: “Yes, I work here. Like all the time.” She didn’t like that question, judged him already as a creeper like most man. She looks at her screen and notifications from craigslist are still raining. Closes the tab, and hears sirens near by.
Grace: “The police has arrived, I’ll see you later.” And steps out of the reception and she is wearing an almost see throughout summer dress that looked like lingerie. Gary stares at her long legs and decides to go to his room.
Police arrived to heartbreak hotel. Roy, a Native American cop and Laura, a hispanic bombshell murder detective pull out of the car. Laura starts bitching about how tacky is this motel. It has always given her bad vibes with that sign that the hotel had. It was a big ass neon heart bleeding from a dagger in the middle. Laura says to Roy: “This should be our victim, that sign, why are people so cringe?” Roy doesn’t say anything mostly because he is a regular client that loved the company of lady’s of the night. As he walk he asked to himself if the hot girl was still working there. He had a crush on Grace, like everyone else.
Grace comes out of the reception and says: “The body is in Room 13.”
Chapter 1
Grace is one of those characters that grew up in a foster home. Her foster father had a scar near his left eye, probably from ‘the botched abortion his mom try to have’ she once said to a friend as she gestured with her hand fashioning as a hook. Her foster father, Juan, was an hispanic immigrant who married Violet. They meet years ago on vacation trip to Mazatlán Mexico. Juan was only eighteen, and Violet 31. The vacation never ended, two months later he was already married and living in Henderson, Nevada.
Juan always dreamt of being a father. and they didn’t have to be his own.
Grace has three foster siblings: Rose, Mary and Jesus.
CHAPTER 2
Gary was an odd duck. if one would allow their thoughts to run wild and imagine someone that deserve everything he got, that was Gary. Gary was mental, and knew how to make money. Growing up under the care of Lucia, an italian opera signer that gave up her life in the Opera to raise an angel. She enroll herself community college to take an Early Childhood Education Diploma, so she make her son a king. Dale, the father, was an excellent accountant for the jews in Houston, Texas. He knew how to work those books like nobody else. His affection for Gary was about doing things together, teaching him how to change a tire, took him on Sundays to play tennis, and talk about numbers and how to budget and always have your shit together for tax season. Dale had it togheter and also starting going to agnostic group meetings to see who was really who? And how can we make some business about it.
Gary, as he holds his raquet on his left hand preparing to start the game asks his father: “how many times i have to beat you old man?” Dale answers; “Until you learn how to lo lose.” Gary whispered: “Never.” and dubbed on the air as if he was an action hero. Gary loved his old man, he taught him the most brilliant thing in the world: Critical thought and how to make money with it. It was brilliant. Explain the ABCs Always Be closing, in the age of consumption and capitalism. Life is life that: ready, set, play, match, love. Gary also grew up watching Scarface on tv. No matter at what time he turn on the tv and it was playing he had to watch it. Gary only called one women by “baby”and that was Michel Pfeiffer. Gary stares a you and says to tv screen: “baby, you are a doll.”
There was no internet back on Gary’s young days, so everyone had toys. Gary grew up when the first atari went to market. He also had a dirt bike and went to Karate Clases, he got as far as brown belt, but then in a twist with destiny meet his first love. Her name was Gabriela. He didn’t not know how to approach it so he shower her with gifts. The first day he saw her was outside of a 7eleven, with her friends having liters of waters and chewing gum.” He asked his friends that were on the car with him if someone knew her and one answered: “Yes, she is my cousin.” Gary went all out and sent her a glove-roses-teddy bear arrangement with hand written invitation to meet for romantic purposes. That was it, now Gary had to make money to show Gabriela a good time.
Gary graduated as an Arquitect at 26. Before he graduated he use to party all the time. To fund his lifestyle he was selling on the down low. Anything you want. If this story was being told in todays era the job is like a door dash, but his deliveries included: buzz, smokes, cigarettes and the contacts of the most mortally corrupt girls in town. Soon those kinds of favors started getting more expensive and dangerous. Gary was taking advantage of all the tools the world with internet had to offer. He was making a killing.
Chapter 3
Juan did not met Grace through the foster system. One day when driving with his first wife, Violet saw a 17 year old girl walking on the road. Violet looks at Juan and tells him: “Poor angel, we have to help her.” Violet was older than Juan, and missed the baby train by choice. She is a believer, and whispers her own prayers to her guardian angel. Touches her heart pendant and asks Juan: Can we keep her?”
On the way to the police station Juan asks Grace questions like: “Are you lost?” Grace answers: “no, I escaped” Juan: “Where you in danger? What happened?” Grace looks through the window of the car and told Juan a story of being abducted by some dark creatures. That she was running away from her home because she came from an abusive household, she was an orphan adopted by a crazy couple of christians.
Juan thought that the girl was in that age that would entertain those kinds of thoughts while being under the influence. Maybe she just lost her friends in a rave and wonder off. Juan told Violet and Grace, that maybe today wasn’t the day they will ask help from the authorities. “Most of the time… they only make things worse.” Juan sighs as he makes a turn.
#BATSHITCRAZY
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