more happy than not

Caelan Miracle. 18. Child of Apollo. they/them/he/him

[blackgardensandgraves]

caelan-miracle​:

“We could go there together. A…nap date?” Cael knows they can do it anywhere, but it’s still nice for Theios to make more friends or acquaintances. He might get along with the Hypnos cabin too, they hoped. “Oh, it’s very easy! We can play with Evan or Robbie too, it’s more fun to play it with more people.”

Theios laughed at the suggestion, smiling because it was a funny, but very sweet, thought. “That sounds nice, but I’m not too sure they’d be happy to have me.” Son of Hades and not exactly social. Still, he’d go if Caelan wanted to- and who knew, maybe he’d actually be able to sleep, if Caelan was there. He trusted Caelan. “That’d be fun. We could make it a little game night or something. I don’t know many games, though.” He hadn’t played any games in years and the ones he did know he was very, very rusty on. It did sound fun, though.

[caelan-miracle]

"They won't notice you at all because they're all sleeping... I'm sure they won't mind us occupying a bed and few pillows. They might join our dreams but I guess it's fine if they'll connect our dreams together?" Caelan grinned under the mask. "Game night. Oh you're on. I'll let them know when we get back!"

[blackgardensandgraves]

caelan-miracle​:

“Oh. Hmm, you should try dropping by the Hypnos cabin. It’s the best place to sleep in, next to being in a bed with your partners.” Caelan loved the soft violin music in that cabin and the scent of fresh laundry… It was so comfortable that they were disappointed that they had to wake up for dinner. At Theios’s statement, Cael blushed and nudged their boyfriend, almost wanting to bury their face on his shoulder. They’d really do it if they were sitting. “I can teach you! I also just learnt that card game called Uno and it’s so fun!”

“Hm, maybe.” But the Hypnos cabin was unfamiliar and Theios wasn’t exactly friendly, which wasn’t added by the stigma of being a child of Hades. Going there might work to make him sleep if he actually asked for it, but he doubted it’d be an easy one. Oh well. He was used to functioning on very little sleep anyway. He smiled at Caelan’s blush and squeezed their hand gently, because he could, because he loved that he could. “Uno? I’ve never heard of it, but I’d be happy to learn if you teach me.” Theios would be willing to learn just about anything, if Caelan asked or was willing to teach him.

[caelan-miracle]

"We could go there together. A...nap date?" Cael knows they can do it anywhere, but it's still nice for Theios to make more friends or acquaintances. He might get along with the Hypnos cabin too, they hoped. "Oh, it's very easy! We can play with Evan or Robbie too, it's more fun to play it with more people."

[rosellevan]

caelan-miracle​:

Cael was surprised at Evan. They thought he’d be annoyed or something at their long hair but was just dealing with it because Cael was keeping it that way. It usually gets in the way of Cael’s sight especially when they’re in bed. “Would you prefer me having shorter hair?” They showed a faint smile and squeezed his hand.

To be fair– Evan was happy with however Caelan kept their hair, as long as they were happy with it. It never mattered that it got in the way whenever they hung out with each other. “If that’s what you would like then I don’t mind you having shorter hair either. I fancied you when you had short hair and I most definitely love you with your long hair. It’s not something that’s important to me but it might be to you so I don’t have a preference.”

[caelan-miracle]

Caelan never really thought that anyone would accept them before. Being lost and ending up decades later in a different year had its perks and this is one of the good things. And it was even better that they found two boys who loved Cael even if they don't fully understand themself. "Okay," they replied. Cael was glad to know Evan liked their hair, long or short. His words kept replaying in their mind and they liked thinking about this more than the mistakes they've done. "Oh. I love you, too," Cael added after a short while. "I think I'm still not okay, and I'm sorry. I'm just... so confused. I'm as confused as I was when I came out of the Casino and now I'm back here."

[rosellevan]

caelan-miracle​:

Cael was looking out of the window, but they really wasn’t seeing anything. They wasn’t familiar with the place anymore and it felt like they was watching some random video or a person driving. So when Evan spoke, Cael found themself getting distracted by their thoughts and turned their head towards their partner. Their hair was one of the very few things they kept since living in this century and it was both a symbol for themself that they used to not belong in this year and that they were living freely in the present. The only time Cael gave in to getting a trim of their split ends was after countless nagging from the sweetest Aphrodite kids. They even taught Cael what products to use and how to keep their hair healthy and soft, being a person who likes being under the sun. Ponytails only existed during Capture the Flag or when they was training—it was very traumatising to see a Camper get an uneven cut from a fight. And, one of the things they loved about having a long hair now was asking Theios to put flowers in their hair because it makes them feel special. “Really?” Cael asked softly, their free hand touching the tips of their hair.

Evan knew how important Cael’s hair was to them– though he never really knows how deep that relationship really goes. But either way, they loved seeing their hair down all the time. He could never really learn how to braid hair but if Cael even brought it up, he’d learn. “Of course, it makes you look softer. Angel-like, dare I say, god-like too.” That was the thought Miracle always had when he would see their partner. The same would go for Theios, even with the almost ever-present scowl on his face. At the stop sign, he turned to face Cael and pressed a kiss on their lips. “But however you want to keep your hair, I still love it.” 

[caelan-miracle]

Cael was surprised at Evan. They thought he'd be annoyed or something at their long hair but was just dealing with it because Cael was keeping it that way. It usually gets in the way of Cael's sight especially when they're in bed. "Would you prefer me having shorter hair?" They showed a faint smile and squeezed his hand.

[blackgardensandgraves]

caelan-miracle​:

Cael turned their head and squinted their eyes at Theios. “And probably why you don’t sleep a lot,” they added jokingly. “Of course! No promises I’ll always bring surprises or food with me, but I really love hanging out with you and Evan. You can always look for me when you’re bored. I’ve learnt a lot of board games and card games lately and they’re so fun! I’m almost unbeatable at poker.” Cael would’ve been good at arcade games too, based on their unfortunate years in Lotus Hotel that seemed to showing with their skills in games. They really hoped that wasn’t the case because they hated the fact that they got stuck in there for too long and yet they can barely remember it happened for years.

Theios shrugged self-consciously as Caelan squinted at him. “Yeah, part of it.” He had trouble remembering that he was safe, sometimes, so sleeping wasn’t very easy. It was easier outside, in the garden, because he was just so used to sleeping outdoors. It was sometimes just weird to sleep on a bed. “You don’t have to bring surprises or food. You are the surprise, and you’re always the best surprise.” Theios didn’t need anything more than their presence to be happy. He laughed a little after. “I’ve never played poker. Or many other card games to be honest.” Theios hadn’t really ever gotten to play many games at all, so it was an unfamiliar topic that he’d be happy to listen to.

[caelan-miracle]

"Oh. Hmm, you should try dropping by the Hypnos cabin. It's the best place to sleep in, next to being in a bed with your partners." Caelan loved the soft violin music in that cabin and the scent of fresh laundry... It was so comfortable that they were disappointed that they had to wake up for dinner. At Theios's statement, Cael blushed and nudged their boyfriend, almost wanting to bury their face on his shoulder. They'd really do it if they were sitting. "I can teach you! I also just learnt that card game called Uno and it's so fun!"

[blackgardensandgraves]

caelan-miracle​:

Cael smiled when their boyfriend let out a laugh, though they wished they could’ve seen his smile too because they were already wearing masks. Besides holding his hand, Cael also held onto his arm. This was just a regular date with his clingy partner. “That’s…very contradicting?” They chuckled. “Well, when I didn’t know what I was, I always tried to stay out late because my father comes home late too… But it was just a small town and there was nothing much to do, and I’m a morning person… But I still love being out and somewhere, even if it’s just at my neighbor’s.”

Theios was plenty pleased to have Caelan holding onto his arm. He didn’t mind Caelan’s clinginess- it was actually rather endearing. It felt nice to be wanted. He paused as they spoke and blinked. “Yeah, I probably didn’t explain that very well. Uhm, so. The streets were safer than where I lived because I could always just start running and get far away. They couldn’t find me on the streets. But there were other things on the streets that could, other things that were just as willing to hurt me. But I could still just run away, so I stayed on the streets for a long while. And then I found Camp.” He listened to Caelan after and smiled gently, even though they couldn’t see it. “The fact that you tried to stay out is sweet. I love it when you come visit me, so if you ever want to be somewhere but don’t have any plans…”

[caelan-miracle]

Cael turned their head and squinted their eyes at Theios. "And probably why you don't sleep a lot," they added jokingly. "Of course! No promises I'll always bring surprises or food with me, but I really love hanging out with you and Evan. You can always look for me when you're bored. I've learnt a lot of board games and card games lately and they're so fun! I'm almost unbeatable at poker." Cael would've been good at arcade games too, based on their unfortunate years in Lotus Hotel that seemed to showing with their skills in games. They really hoped that wasn't the case because they hated the fact that they got stuck in there for too long and yet they can barely remember it happened for years.

[blackgardensandgraves]

caelan-miracle​:

Caelan nodded. “Yup, it’s good. Means we’ve got some time to walk. Lead the way, then.” They supposed their boyfriend knew the way, because if Cael had to lead, they would have to bring out their phone and look for the map, which is not ideal in their situation being a child of an Olympian and a son of the Big Three. “I miss walking safely in the streets.”

Theios laughed a little as Caelan told him to lead the way but he did so willingly, holding Caelan’s hand gently. Their hand was so warm in his, all the time. It felt like holding a miniature sun and Theios loved it. “This way.” He tugged them along, moving rather sedately because there wasn’t really a rush to get to the restaurant. “I’m not sure I ever really thought of the streets as dangerous. Well, I guess I never really thought of them as safe, either. Just a danger that I understood.” So he wasn’t scared, not even with the virus. The thing he was most scared of were cameras, but the masks they wore helped with that. “I’m sure it’s probably different for others, though.”

[caelan-miracle]

Cael smiled when their boyfriend let out a laugh, though they wished they could've seen his smile too because they were already wearing masks. Besides holding his hand, Cael also held onto his arm. This was just a regular date with his clingy partner. "That's...very contradicting?" They chuckled. "Well, when I didn't know what I was, I always tried to stay out late because my father comes home late too... But it was just a small town and there was nothing much to do, and I'm a morning person... But I still love being out and somewhere, even if it's just at my neighbor's."

[rosellevan]

caelan-miracle​:

Cael found their fingers interlocking with Evan’s. This was somehow comforting them. “I want ice cream. Or milkshake or a frappé please.” Anything cold and sweet enough, but those were the ones at the top of their mind right now. “Junk food?” They shrugged, pulling their hair tie off to let their hair loose.

It was more difficult to drive with just one hand but he would manage– all Evan wanted to do was hold his partner’s hand. He shrugged and started looking around for any fast-food restaurant, ones that sold milkshakes. Or they would just end up at Starbucks, he wouldn’t mind as long as they could get what Cael wanted. “I love it when your hair is down. I like it like that much better.”

[caelan-miracle]

Cael was looking out of the window, but they really wasn't seeing anything. They wasn't familiar with the place anymore and it felt like they was watching some random video or a person driving. So when Evan spoke, Cael found themself getting distracted by their thoughts and turned their head towards their partner. Their hair was one of the very few things they kept since living in this century and it was both a symbol for themself that they used to not belong in this year and that they were living freely in the present. The only time Cael gave in to getting a trim of their split ends was after countless nagging from the sweetest Aphrodite kids. They even taught Cael what products to use and how to keep their hair healthy and soft, being a person who likes being under the sun. Ponytails only existed during Capture the Flag or when they was training—it was very traumatising to see a Camper get an uneven cut from a fight. And, one of the things they loved about having a long hair now was asking Theios to put flowers in their hair because it makes them feel special. "Really?" Cael asked softly, their free hand touching the tips of their hair.

[rosellevan]

caelan-miracle​:

Once they were far enough, or maybe it was just a minute since they left the driveaway, Cael placed their hand on Evan’s leg. They just stared at the window, while trying to help with his pain. It was a way to lessen their train of thoughts as they were imagining seeing their old friends walking in the streets. Maybe if Cael saw them right now, they’d recognize them, but they couldn’t exactly remember their faces anymore. “Are you hungry?” Cael spoke. “We could grab something to eat.”

Evan could feel the pain on his leg lessen, already reaching to hold onto Caelan’s hand instead. He couldn’t well pull them towards his side of the car just because he was driving and they said they wanted to get out of there. “We could, yeah. Do you want something quick that we can take back to the hotel?” He would go with whatever Caelan wanted– he really couldn’t care less what it was as long as he could comfort them right after.

[caelan-miracle]

Cael found their fingers interlocking with Evan's. This was somehow comforting them. "I want ice cream. Or milkshake or a frappé please." Anything cold and sweet enough, but those were the ones at the top of their mind right now. "Junk food?" They shrugged, pulling their hair tie off to let their hair loose.

[blackgardensandgraves]

caelan-miracle​:

Caelan closed their eyes when they shadow traveled, holding tightly on their boyfriend. It has been a while since they’ve last did this, and they almost forgot how it felt. Theios’s mere presence gave them comfort, knowing they was safe. “Uh…” Cael blinked around, pulling away from the blond but reached for his hand. “Where are we? Should we walk?”

Theios knew that Caelan wasn’t very fond of shadow-traveling, so he opted to take a slightly shorter route. It meant they’d have to walk a little, but that was probably better than forcing Caelan in the shadows for even longer. He happily took Caelan’s hand after. “We’re down the block. There’s less people here and it’s a little shorter of a trip through the shadows. I hope that’s okay?”

[caelan-miracle]

Caelan nodded. "Yup, it's good. Means we've got some time to walk. Lead the way, then." They supposed their boyfriend knew the way, because if Cael had to lead, they would have to bring out their phone and look for the map, which is not ideal in their situation being a child of an Olympian and a son of the Big Three. "I miss walking safely in the streets."

[caelan-miracle]

rosellevan​:

“You don’t have to pretend, Cael.” Evan leaned forward and pressed a kiss on Caelan’s lips. He put on his seatbelt and started to drive away from the neighbourhood, away from the place that used to be familiar to his partner. Evan drove rather quickly, eager to get out of there just as Caelan.

Once they were far enough, or maybe it was just a minute since they left the driveaway, Cael placed their hand on Evan’s leg. They just stared at the window, while trying to help with his pain. It was a way to lessen their train of thoughts as they were imagining seeing their old friends walking in the streets. Maybe if Cael saw them right now, they’d recognize them, but they couldn’t exactly remember their faces anymore. “Are you hungry?” Cael spoke. “We could grab something to eat.”

[caelan-miracle]

blackgardensandgraves​:

Theios laughed quietly at Caelan’s excitement and leaned over to kiss their cheek. “I’m sure he’d be happy to have you.” Lucien was a nice guy and Caelan was very sweet and Lucien tended to be invested in things that made Theios happy, one of which was definitely Caelan. He didn’t see any problems with this. He shrugged at the question because that was a hard no, he didn’t sleep properly, he barely slept- though he was sleeping considerably more now that he had safe places to sleep. “I love my garden. The dirt is very comfortable.” It was safe and the flowers smelled sweet and Theios liked the calm feeling that being in the garden gave him. He smiled at Caelan after they put on their mask and he coped them, slipping a plain, undecorated mask over his lower face. Then he gathered Caelan in a tight hold and wrapped the shadows around them, blatantly using the shadowtravel as an excuse to cling right back.

Caelan closed their eyes when they shadow traveled, holding tightly on their boyfriend. It has been a while since they’ve last did this, and they almost forgot how it felt. Theios’s mere presence gave them comfort, knowing they was safe. “Uh...” Cael blinked around, pulling away from the blond but reached for his hand. “Where are we? Should we walk?”

[rosellevan]

caelan-miracle​:

Cael’s eyes landed on the warm hand that took their own hand and they lifted their gaze to their partner. They looked very close to tears and could only nod and squeeze Evan’s hand. They was very thankful for his support. They should really stop thinking what could’ve happened if they never left and got lost in the Lotus Hotel. Still, Cael remembered that the longer they stayed here, the more that Evan’s leg would be hurting, so they just pulled him in the direction of the driver’s side to help him.

Evan tried to smile and show his support for Caelan, not knowing how comforting he was actually being to his partner. He could only imagine what they felt and he himself was overwhelmed with what they had talked about. Walking towards the car, hearing the clack-clack of the cane on the pavement, Evan let out a sigh once he’s sat down on the driver’s seat. “Do you want to get some food or just go straight to the hotel?” He asked, not knowing if Cael would be up for more conversation than just that.

[caelan-miracle]

Cael smiled sadly, though it can be taken as a forced smile too. When Evan had settled in, they went to the other side of the car and got in. "I don't know. Let's just leave for now, please," Cael sniffled. They wanted to get away for now from the place they grew up in and had called home.

[blackgardensandgraves]

caelan-miracle​:]

“He’d be like, my Camp dad or something,” Cael said, since their mortal father was still alive. “Huh. This would also make Teren my dad too.” As if Teren would ever let them. “Yes, shadowtravel. I’d like to avoid other people as much as possible. But first, you need a mask, flower.”

“Something like that.” Theios snickered softly, though it was because that sounded funny. He hadn’t asked about Caelan’s family- it seemed a sore topic. His own had been for a while and still was, his mother excluded. It wasn’t fair to ask if he wasn’t willing to share, so he didn’t. “Please, I am begging you, stop reminding me. I am not ready to face that fact. I need a full three days in the garden, in the dirt, to process.” If he even processed at all. Then again, Teren had been eerily pleasant lately. This was both a promising thing and something that poked at Theios’ ingrained paranoia. He blinked at Caelan after. “I keep one by the door, one in my pocket, and a couple in my backpack. Do you need one?”

[caelan-miracle]

"I hope he lets me be his camp child. Or his child too, since I'm one of your partners?" Cael was really excited about this idea. They missed having something like a father figure in their life. "You're always in your garden! Do you even sleep properly?" They remembered meeting Theios for the first time, sleeping outside and unconsciously tossing out his sketchbook when he was dreaming. Maybe Cael should start digging Theios's grave if they find Theios sleeping in his garden at an odd hour. "Oh, that's perfect, I love you. Never forget masks. I have my own, but thank you for the offer." Cael always had one in their pocket since last year. Putting their face mask on, they clung and wrapped their arms around their boyfriend after. "Let's go!"

[caelan-miracle]

rosellevan​:

Evan never visited this area– his father told him not to. But before he could even ask why, his father had died and he had already been sent off to the military. They never got to ask because it seemed like there was a reason for the pained looks his father had if he mentioned it. “You don’t have to, my love. But thank you.”

The whole day was quite tiring already, seeing Caelan’s father and being mistaken as his senior. It was tiring for him and he couldn’t imagine how his partner felt. Reaching for their hand, Evan squeezed lightly. Fuck the people who would be watching them. “Do you want to go to the hotel now?”

Cael’s eyes landed on the warm hand that took their own hand and they lifted their gaze to their partner. They looked very close to tears and could only nod and squeeze Evan’s hand. They was very thankful for his support. They should really stop thinking what could’ve happened if they never left and got lost in the Lotus Hotel. Still, Cael remembered that the longer they stayed here, the more that Evan’s leg would be hurting, so they just pulled him in the direction of the driver’s side to help him.

[caelan-miracle]

blackgardensandgraves​:

“Never. Didn’t see the point- if he wasn’t dating them then, it didn’t matter much to me.” Theios wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing, but it was what it was. He didn’t tend to think of Lucien in terms of romantic attachments, but he did know that Lucien had dated people before. “I’m sure he’d be your dad too, if you asked.” He paused and made a face after. “Don’t remind me. Ugh.” He was having trouble wrapping his head around that and often just didn’t think about it if he could avoid it. He smiled after, small and sweet. “Yeah, I guess you could say that. Home.” It felt like a good word for it, even if Theios was sure there was more to it than that. Still. He laughed a bit as Caelan took his hands and twined their fingers together. “Do you want to shadowtravel?” That was the fastest way, but if Caelan preferred something else, Theios was down to listen.

"He'd be like, my Camp dad or something," Cael said, since their mortal father was still alive. "Huh. This would also make Teren my dad too." As if Teren would ever let them. "Yes, shadowtravel. I'd like to avoid other people as much as possible. But first, you need a mask, flower."

[caelan-miracle]

rosellevan​:

“It was too painful for him to show me around.” Evan said softly, knowing that his dad had his reasons why. Sometimes, he wondered if it was the right decision but he couldn’t do anything about that now. His dad wasn’t around anymore. Unbuckling his seat belt, he shifted to turn towards Caelan. “A drive would be better, I think. My leg, after all that travelling? Not a good thing. It’s aching.” He admitted rather shyly. “But we can walk around when it’s better while we’re still here.”

Cael looked sorry about that. They was probably one of the reasons why, and now they even ruined Evan’s childhood because of it. “Oh yeah... We could just call it a day and drive around the next day. I’m sorry. I’ll help with your leg later, alright?” Reaching out, they placed their hand on Evan’s leg. “Thank you again, love.”

After a couple of hours of meeting their father, Cael was actually relieved it was over for today. They thanked his nurse and left quietly, not bothering to check up on the other relative who lived in the house. As much as they wanted to hold Evan’s hand for some support on the way back to the car, they found themself holding themself back, afraid of the stares from people if there were any peeking out from windows in the neighborhood. Cael was staring at the ground as they walked, still processing the things they’ve talked about.