beatbox.
a long time ago somebody told me that we are- at any given time in our lives- a direct reflection of = "the people we hang out with, the books we read, and the messages we listen to"
there is a simplified version of this known as "garbage in = garbage out" - which i totally agree with. spend time with a bunch of assholes, and you will find yourself being more of an asshole yourself. it's basic psychology/sociology- not rocket science.
nothing is "always" of course, it's not black and white, but for the most part this theory is pretty spot on, and i have seen it at work in myself and in the people around me. the good news is- if you spend all your time with a bunch of saints- you will be more likely to hesitate before behaving like an asshole. it's a fact.
i stopped watching television in 1990 (thank you george bush sr. and oliver north) for this approximate reason. garbage in = garbage out. i didn't want my daughter to see the violence that was suddenly (and endlessly) being televised during the gulf war. so, i turned it off one day, and i never turned it back on again. (honestly, i have never even seen seinfeld, sex in the city, the sopranos… not once). over time, i became a much stronger opponent of commercial television and the got on the "garbage in= is really bad for kids" team. when my kids got older - video games were a non-issue. no way. no how. (lucky for me- they didn't have smartphones when they were still in school). but, this writing of mine this morning isn't meant to be specifically about child-rearing, although if you are a parent and you put it in that context- it sheds more light on the power i am talking about. if you believe that what your kids watch, read, and listen to- has a lot of power over them- why would you think that you are any different? kids are more malleable? maybe. but we are surprisingly malleable as adults too. we also surprisingly capable of the act of denial.
that being said- the internet can be a little (or a lot) like a television, of course, especially social media sites like facebook. (for the sake of this conversation, let's assume we aren't talking about streaming 'television' on your computer). if i get up every day and get on facebook (or whatever), and my news feed is full of garbage… well, garbage in. there it is.
on the one hand - i love having the luxury to "tune" my media precisely how i want it, and i'm not going to lie: there is a distinct part of my personality that loves biting sarcasm and mean-spirited wit. (those "your E-cards" for instance… hysterical).
i LOVE a good laugh. i love the e-cards, i love the people of walmart, i love the "what your frat buddies did while their friend was passed-out" photos. i admit the huffington post has lot's of fascinatingly bad news. seriously, if you know me at all, you know that i have always loved the subversive, the dark, and the morbid. if it's: "god, that's painful to look at" i will definitely want to look. i would not dream of telling you some of the websites i have spent time on over the years. guilty as charged.
but what i am also guilty of - is slowly falling more and more in love with good news. i love the dalai lama, upworthy, giveback films (those guys out giving away food, clothing, and money and filming the reactions), all of the sites that promote saving the planet- and all sort of other pages of positivity. but what i noticed about me- is that when i tune into the "good" pages- they inspire me to want to do good things. those people and pages inspire me. period. [and yes, you can stop reading at any time and go back to the hilariousness of humanity]. the good stuff INSPIRES me- the bad stuff just poisons me. it makes me bitter, it feeds that part of me that is still a little bit angry and takes pleasure in the 'yuck' and it FEEDS indifference, impatience, and intolerance. i am not saying that i have become a saint. nope. but what i am saying is that i am paying attention, i am noticing ME, and i am noticing you- because i see what you feel is worthy of sharing too... all i may be doing is pointing out and overstating the obvious. but what have i got to lose? not much- my reputation is questionable anyway. what have i got to gain? you tell me.
poison begets poison. i am slowly turning my antenna away from the poison. i am simply talking about it. un-poison. not rocket-science.
i am not alone in thinking that we are somewhere/somehow approaching the edge of a giant social shift. i don't really know why, or when, or how… but something is brewing, and it's not something i need to don a tin-foil hat to talk about. as much as i often feel hopeless- like we are killing the planet, poisoning our minds, our kids will never be the same because of smartphones, the internet and the tsunami of porn that your children have definitely already been exposed to… there is another part of me that continues to notice that steadily louder drum beat of people who are working to create positive change. the lazy part of me says: "it's no use" -- 'it's too late" the fracking is irreversible, the GMO's are already in our bellies, the cancer is killing us, the big money running the show has already won, there are too many people who have turned the volume on that drumbeat down- with the pharmaceuticals they put in their mouths/heads/hearts every single day. it's much easier to have another drink, turn the game up louder, buy something awesome for the holidays…
exhausted. overwhelmed. busy. scared. i know. i GET it. ("oh, easy for you to say..." ) go ahead. it is not actually easy for me to say. all of our battles are different. don't judge mine, and i will offer you the same kindness. if you read what i have written and what occurs for you is in any way negative- i invite you to get up from your computer and go look in the mirror and explain to yourself why that is...
one good thing. one good deed.
listen for that drum beat. because it's out there.