Noah Kuttler, Information Broker

Known only as the Calculator to most, I'm the information broker to the criminal universe. No one, and I mean NO ONE (I'm looking at you Oracle) is better at hacking than I am. Might I remind you all who organized the ENTIRE SUPER VILLAIN COMMUNITY to attack Metropolis? Without telepathy (you cheaters). Yeah. That was me. Anyway, my name's Noah Kuttler, not that it appears on any databases. My archenemy is Oracle, who I've been working for years to identify. I feel like I know who they are, but I get 'static' every time I try to delve into that memory. I had a family, but I don't like to talk or think about that...

[calculatingdoom]

((It's four am and I'm up and I don't want to be ugggh))

[roseravagerworth]

+ calculatingdoom

[calculatingdoom]

"No, but then again, nothing really does…speaking of which, how’s Jericho? Hm?"

[roseravagerworth]

"Wouldn’t know, I haven’t seen him in months. Knowing you if you did anything to him I’ll have oh so much fun making you suffer for it. Oh speaking about suffering. How are you electronic innards? They doing well? If not I’m sure I could put in a few finishing touches."

[calculatingdoom]

"I’ve had nothing to do with him. Body-snatchers are generally able to drop off the map, and I have better things to do than keep tabs on him. Are you referring to my androids? I’d actually appreciate if you could destroy a few more, they’re quite the nuisances. I’m not sure what I was thinking when I designed them…"

[roseravagerworth]

Rose shrugs. “Don’t care, just stating the truth. Well isn’t your life just full of excitement! I was actually, hoping you were one of them. Guess only a good stab to the gut would give it away. Probably something along the lines of being annoying as hell and randomly exploding upon contact.”

[calculatingdoom]

Calculator grimaces. "Note to self, start wearing at least minimal body armor to avoid disembowelment." 

[roseravagerworth]

+ calculatingdoom

[calculatingdoom]

"No, but then again, nothing really does…speaking of which, how’s Jericho? Hm?"

[roseravagerworth]

"Wouldn’t know, I haven’t seen him in months. Knowing you if you did anything to him I’ll have oh so much fun making you suffer for it. Oh speaking about suffering. How are you electronic innards? They doing well? If not I’m sure I could put in a few finishing touches."

[calculatingdoom]

"I've had nothing to do with him. Body-snatchers are generally able to drop off the map, and I have better things to do than keep tabs on him. Are you referring to my androids? I'd actually appreciate if you could destroy a few more, they're quite the nuisances. I'm not sure what I was thinking when I designed them..."

[calculatingdoom]

((Seriously considering starting a Dog-Welder, Condiment King, or Kite-Man RPG blog. 

Or on the flip side of things with actual serious characters, a Jericho, Corinthian,

or Blue Beetle (Ted Kord) profile.

Decisions, decisions, decisions.))

?

[ineedthemark-blog-blog]

calculatingdoom ... thegoblinjr found your hiding place.

Victor fidgets with his layers of clothing, his usual nervous tic of running a hand through his hair thwarted tonight by the ski cap pushed down almost over his eyes, hiding a forehead full of scars. 

"Right, ah, hi."

[calculatingdoom]

"Hello Victor. No need to worry about me...I'm just here to check in on you, see if you're interested in any mercenary work in the foreseeable future. There's always a high demand for former Arkhamites, you'd be surprised how fast word spreads. Of course, if you're not up for it, I could always attempt to talk to Pyg. Key word, 'attempt'."

[calculatingdoom]

Headcanon theme song

[calculatingdoom]

Family

Noah was at every single school event and graduation that Wendy and Marvin had. Usually he would get some kind of temp job a few weeks beforehand, so he could watch without anyone seeing him. He might have cried just a tiny bit when they graduated absolutely top of their class.

[roseravagerworth]

+ calculatingdoom

"Please tell me you’re here because you realize your life mistakes and you want me to kill you."

[calculatingdoom]

"I had somewhat hoped I had at graduated, if not to family friend, than at least to ‘only kill if offered money. Wistful thinking on my part I guess." 

[roseravagerworth]

"How insulting, you’re mistaking me for my father. I don’t take money for killing. If I kill someone they deserve it, it’s as simple as that. Which member of my family are you friends with anyway? Slade? Definitely not something that saves you from a stab wound."

[calculatingdoom]

"No, but then again, nothing really does...speaking of which, how's Jericho? Hm?"

[stitchrps]

For every word "Family" I get in my inbox, I will write a family headcanon about my character.

[herbertwest]

My headcanon Calculator (Noah Kuttler).

[herbertwest]

Tiny Titans style Calculator the wonderful Franco made for me at NYCC this year. 

I then proceeded to freak out for the rest of the day, as Ice and Guy would tell you.

No, seriously, I was just running around like a kid who discovered candy for the first time, and miraculously found themselves in a candy store.

[teenlantern-moved-deactivated20]

calculatingdoom

[teenlantern-moved-deactivated20]

[ Smiles and waves. ]

[calculatingdoom]

"Er…hello there?" Noah had to say he was unaccustomed to that sort of response.

[teenlantern-moved-deactivated20]

"Yes, hi." A pause. "Who are you?"

[calculatingdoom]

"Oh, I'm just a networking agent. Think of me as...hero Facebook or something." 

[glitchexmachina]

calculatingdoom has attempted a hack

"We’re sorry," the automated voice echoed from the computers, "The brute force hacking program you sent has been kicked in the digital junk. Also, it grew junk. Weird, huh? Oh, and it failed hardcore."

[calculatingdoom]

Calculator blinked in surprise. That wasn't a typical error message. He wasn't sure he wanted to solve this mystery. 

[roseravagerworth]

+ calculatingdoom

"Please tell me you’re here because you realize your life mistakes and you want me to kill you."

[calculatingdoom]

"I had somewhat hoped I had at graduated, if not to family friend, than at least to 'only kill if offered money. Wistful thinking on my part I guess." 

[calculatingdoom]

((RPing makes me really wish I had my comics available, and not several hundred miles away.))

[teenlantern-moved-deactivated20]

calculatingdoom

[teenlantern-moved-deactivated20]

[ Smiles and waves. ]

[calculatingdoom]

"Er...hello there?" Noah had to say he was unaccustomed to that sort of response.

[calculatingdoom]

((It's been forever since I did this kind of RPing...I'm afraid I'm a little rusty on the etiquette. If I mess something up, please let me know and I'll fix it ASAP.))