Confessions of a Funeral Director

I'm a sixth generation licensed funeral director and embalmer in Pennsylvania, USA. I have a graduate degree in Theology and a certificate in Thanatology. Writing is my therapy. I blog at www.calebwilde.com

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💅💄💼💋

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― Terry Pratchett, The Last Continent

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Born July 25, 1941, Emmett Till was just a 14-year-old boy who had come down from Chicago to Mississippi with his cousins. “Bobo,” as he was known to family members, had recovered from polio to become a funny and out-going young man. He had no idea that he would be kissing his (single and quite extraordinary) mother good-bye for the last time at a train station on August 19, 1955. 

On August 24, 1955, Emmett was in Money, Mississippi, with his cousins and other teenagers when they entered a grocery store. Used to the freedom he experienced in his community in Chicago, Emmett interacted with the clerk (and shop owner’s wife) while he bought bubble gum in a way that the white community found inappropriate. Accounts vary on whether he whistled at, flirted with, or actually touched the woman, but what happened after is clear: the store’s owner, Roy Bryant, and an accomplice, J.W. Milam, took Emmett from his uncle’s home, beat him brutally, dragged him to the bank of the Tallahatchie River, and shot him in the head. They then tied his body to a large metal fan with barbed wire and put him in the river. Three days later, after being reported missing by his uncle, Emmett’s body was pulled out of the river. His face was so mutilated that his uncle could only identify him by a ring given to him by his mother before he left Chicago. 

What makes this case truly remarkable, and one of the catalysts of the Civil Rights Movement, is what Emmett’s mother, Mamie Till Bradley, chose to do next. Her son’s body was shipped to Chicago, where Bradley refused to allow funeral directors to restore his natural features or close the casket. For five days, Bradley endured the vision of her son’s mangled body and allowed him to be seen by thousands of visitors to the funeral home because she wanted “the world to see what they did to my boy.”

Photos of the boy were published in some media outlets in the weeks between the funeral and the trial. The nation seemed outraged, as Emmett’s mother hoped they would be. Emmett’s uncle testified againt’s Emmett’s killers during the trial, putting himself in grave danger, but Bryant and Milam were acquitted by an all-white, all-male jury after a 67 minute deliberation. They confessed to the crime a few months later and even sold their story to Look magazine for $4,000.

Emmett’s body is interred at Burr Oak Cemetery in Alsip, Illinois.

Learn and see more at PBS’ The American Experience or Biography.com. 

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“We live. We die. And in between, we garden.”

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This is the Extinct Species Graveyard at the Bronx Zoo in New York. The only “gravestone” not included in this post is that of the Labrador Duck.

I was very pleased to find this little display at the zoo even though some of the dates are inaccurate.

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Ten Reasons to Date a Funeral Director

10. A funeral director knows how to stretch a dollar so far beyond capacity that extreme couponers would be seething with envy.

9. Funeral directors can get any stain out of any fabric.

8. Funeral directors understand the importance of paperwork. In triplicate. And filling it out is just par for the course. Tax season doesn’t compare to corporate budgetary reviews.

7. A funeral director is meticulously clean. From an unwelcome speck of dust on the end table to a mortifying bit of grit underneath near-perfectly manicured nails (this applies to the women and the men).

6. Have you ever not introduced a current flame to your family because you’re afraid your kin’s special brand of crazy will scare off any potential mate?

A funeral director is like a “crazy person whisperer.” They have to be just to get anything done. Bring on the monster in-laws.

5. A funeral director can’t be grossed out. Ever. There is literally nothing you could show one that would churn the contents of his stomach. This applies to noxious odours as well, so snag yourself a funeral director and feel at ease passing gas whenever the urge hits. They’ve smelled worse.

A lot worse.

4. Funeral directors are masters of illusion. Need to impress your boss at a dinner party? Stage your home for sale? Conceal something from your parents until you’re ready to deal, or the issue has been resolved? A funeral director thrives under one credo: Smoke and mirrors.

3. A funeral director understands how important it is to live for today, but plan meticulously for the future.

2. A funeral director is an expert at burying secrets. Yours are not as bad as you think they are, and the funeral director’s training ensures that your skeletons not only stay in their closet, but that the closet is sealed in a concrete vault under 8 feet of dirt and the paperwork has been properly “sanitized.”

1. A funeral director knows how to give you a delicious, full-body, invigorating massage that gets your circulation working overtime and leaves you feeling, well, like you’ve risen from the dead. How did we acquire this particular skill?

Don’t ask.

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By trying to preserve our dead bodies, we deny death, poison the living and further harm the environment.

Jae Rhim Lee (via greenburials)

[calebwilde]

Jeremiah's new favorite book happens to be witten by my good friend @matthewpaulturner

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at Wolf's Hollow County Park

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That shiny thing behind me is a resomator. I know. You're jealous. #nfda2014

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One tweet nails everything wrong with the reaction to Amanda Bynes’ meltdown 

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“Does she have a name?”

That’s the question I always ask. If you’re in the funeral home to make funeral arrangements for a miscarriage at 15 weeks, of course she has a name. Sometimes – only sometimes - they don’t have names. From the hospital, they’re usually just “baby,” the last name of the...

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[calebwilde]

foto-jennic:

Christina Bothwell

[calebwilde]

The TP holder in the basement bathroom of our funeral home has a cat on it.

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These are some of them, most were golden retrivers and labradors, but also included german shepherds and other breeds. Sadly most are dead now, while many people forget them and don’t spare them a thought. 

As people lay dying, trapped and hurt, a team of nearly 100 loyal and courageous search dogs put their lives on the line to help humans. Without them, many more would not have survived, yet few people consider them. 

In such a chaotic, terrifying, hot, acrid-smelling, smokey and loud environment, countless human lives depended on their ability to focus, listen, respond to their handlers, and work tirelessly. Stepping over cracked glass, hot tarmac, through flames and thick smoke, being winched over deep ravines, they battled on to seek out survivors and bring them aid. 

They worked around the clock, day and night, searching, sniffing, over and over. Not only did they search, but they comforted - many eyewitnesses speak of how the dogs would stop and sit by newly-recovered victims, giving them a sense of hope and relief, before moving on to look for the next. As the situation became desperate, and the rescue workers and fire teams became utterly distraught at the amount of people who were recovered dead, these dogs brought them comfort, sitting with them on breaks, letting them grieve.

Many of these dogs are old, and have passed away. Let us remember the courage and loyalty they showed at such a horrendous event. They didn’t have a choice, but nonetheless they did what was asked of them and helped save countless lives. Don’t let their bravery be forgotten today either, or their determination to be a ‘good dog’ despite the scary and dangerous environment around them.

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I’m not crying I just have feelings in my eyes

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Obit of the Day (Historical): Victims of 9/11 (2001)

2,977 killed*.

World Trade Center and surrounding area - 2606 Pentagon - 125 American Airlines Flight 11 (North Tower) - 87 American Airlines Flight 77 (Pentagon) - 59 United Airlines Flight 175 (South Tower) - 60 United Airlines Flight 93 (Shanksville, PA) - 40

* The 19 hijackers are not included in any of the casualties listed.

(Data from wikipedia.org. Image courtesy of University of Missouri - Kansas City, and was used in the Zacarias Moussaoui trial. All but 92 victims are pictured somewhere above.)

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Reblogged from 9/9/11

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OBIT OF THE DAY 9/11    Please reblog……….never forget