Looking for love

My hobbies are drinking and gathering firewood.

[calibabe-blog1]

Me and squad. Going to miss these guys! Even though they were really impressionable, and their inebriation got in the way of my eventual reclamation of the island, not to mention their commentary on the human condition’s propensity to entitlement... Bitter? I’m not bitter! I’m fine! Everything is fine!

[calibabe-blog1]

Everyone is stupid.

Prospero is stupid for hurting me daily in “fill[ing] my skin with pinches” (4:1:231) and threatening me with turning me to “barnacles, or to [an ape] with foreheads villainous low” (4:1:247), yet discarding his conduit of power -- which has has relied upon for all manner of devices for the last 12 years --  as soon as he leaves the island.

Miranda is stupid for falling for the first non-old, non-Caliban man she meets.

Alonso is stupid because he instills a fratricidal megalomaniac as Milan’s duke, and thinks his position secured.

Sebastian is stupid for letting his fool-hearted brother rule as king of Naples, and “Let[ting] his fortune sleep” (2:1:211-212). 

Gonzalo is stupid for envisioning a world without ambition.

Ferdinand is stupid for envisioning his future without temptation.

AND DON’T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON TRINCULO AND STEPHANO!

Tbh, the only beings on this island with decent heads on their shoulders -- possessing both the cunning to calculate and the ambition to act -- are Ariel, Antonio, and good old Caliban. What a shame that one is a hermaphroditic water-nymph, and the other is a  land-grubbing amoral aristocrat.  

[calibabe-blog1]

How to be Prospero: Catchphrases Edition!

"Use 'em and abuse 'em!"

"Fave 'em and enslave 'em!"

"Pet 'em and forget 'em!"

"Owe 'em and forgo 'em!"

[prosperotherightfulduke-blog]

people i like: miranda, ariel, ferdinand (but i have to pretend i hate him), gonzalo (thank u for the books but ur a traitorous tortoise)

people i hate: antonio, caliban, alonzo

people who like me: everyone i am magic

[i-am-naples]

@prosperotherightfulduke sorry but where is UR kingdom again???? 

[mirandaofmilan-blog]

thanks dad!!!!

[i-am-ferdinand-blog]

glad u like me!!!!!

[calibabe-blog1]

Sorry Prospero, but I have a newsflash about that “people who like me” part... “[Prospero] hath not/ One spirit to command: they all do hate him/ As rootedly as I” (3.2. 91-93)

[calibabe-blog1]

Ban-Ban, Ca-Caliban

Me being a legend

[prosperotherightfulduke-blog]

Who would thou rather date? Certainly not the revolting slave on the right. Ghastly!

[calibabe-blog1]

Caliban doesn’t know his lefts and rights... but he would most certainly court that dashing rogue with the celestial liquor, than the bald-chested, high-school-musical-singing hoodlum pictured above!

[calibabe-blog1]

How to be Prospero:

Step 1: Be a powerful wizard, capable of summoning storms, commanding spirits and putting people to sleep with a single thought.

Step 2: Rely on Caliban to find firewood to warm your home.

Step 3: Rely on Caliban to gather food for you and your daughter.

Step4: Rely on Caliban for any task that requires such physically demanding activities as walking, picking up sticks, or possessing a basic knowledge of one's surroundings/environment.

And they say "I" am the unlearnst one...

[calibabe-blog1]

Here are photos of two different men. 

One is a cruel ruler, who lords over his subjects with an iron fist, and forces his subordinates into backbreaking manual labor.

The other is Kim Jong-un

[calibabe-blog1]

Who needs California when you have Caliban?

[calibabe-blog1]

Thinking of you, Prospero <3...

...and how I’ll coerce the newly-arrived inhabitants, overthrow you of your cruel despotic grip of the island, and take back what is rightfully mine!  xoxo ~Caliban

[calibabe-blog1]

(via Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin)

[calibabe-blog1]

Just chilling at my crib ;))

[calibabe-blog1]

(via Ancient Aliens)

[calibabe-blog1]

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