Hi my name is Rex, my pronouns are He/him I’m a 18 year old gay autistic aroace trans guy.
My hyperfixations jump around a lot so the fandoms I post stuff for change all the time but my special interests are Mcyt, art, Byler, Ninjago, and F1 (MV3 GR63 OP81 AL41) so if ur into any of those they’re probably always on my blog :)
Also feel free to message me to chat about fandom stuff! I love info dumping and I love listening to info dumps so I will happily chat with you!
Here’s a link to my Ao3
(Most of my works are locked to registered users only due to the issues with AI scraping)
I post one shots over there, for a variety of fandoms. It would be pretty cool if u went and checked it out :) Just make sure you check the tags as there’s some pretty heavy content on there.
There’s links/info for specific fics below the cut if you’re interested! :)
Gax Fics
Daddy's home (home for me) - Pwp domestic fluffy gax exploring Max's Daddy kink and being pathetic together.
Where I can Scream (how I love you)- Max is down so horrendously bad, but George is terrified of commitment because he's convinced himself that there's no way Max could actually love him. They have a big fight about it, and finally realize they're being idiots.
Byler Fics
You're such a Dork (Of course I'll say yes.)- A very fluffy fic where Mike proposes to Will using D&D, including all of the buildup and planning Mike puts into it.
You Can Listen to the Sound (of my glass heart shatter) - Cannon compliant, Mike angst, based on the finale with the interpretation that Mike takes Will's coming out as a rejection and all of his thoughts throughout.
It's Okay, You're safe with me.- Mike is autistic and age regresses (although he is not aware of it) and Will takes care of him.
I'm a Big Boy Now (So don't be mean to bugs)- Modern au, Mike is regressed, but is somehow convinced that he's taking care of Will and not the other way around. Not even being 5 years old will stop Mike from protecting what matters most.
I wanted you to write me (but not like this)- Angsty take on lettergate. Will confronts Mike about never writing to him, Mike reveals that he did write him one letter, but never sent it. A suicide note.
Boys don't cry- Conformity gate Mike angst, Or Mike is made to believe that he was too late.
Oath-bound to you my dearest- Fluffy cleradin fic where they swear an oath to bind them together. Even if they can't get married they'll find a way to be as close to it as possible.
Hiding in your sheets (something that will break me)- Will finds bloodstains in Mike's bed. Mike admits that he's been hurting himself.
Scattered 'cross my family line (but you'll always let me inside)- Found family fluff where Mike knows he's always got a place at the byers-hopper household. Even if is own family sucks.
God forbid That I Romanticize this- Mike is ready to die. Will finds him lying on the train tracks in the middle of the night and accidentally saves his life.
Aid My Aching Heart- Mike's struggles with internalized homophobia, and the fear that comes with loving a boy during the aids crisis.
Mcyt Fics
Feelings are Stupid (even more so than you)- Ksmp Clownzy, based around all the moments with Clown that Branzy describes, but now they're from Clown's pov and he's having an angsty gay crisis the entire time.
Baby Bunny you're allowed to be small- Agre where Kab wakes up small but tries to force herself to act big. Clown reminds her that there's nothing wrong with needing a day off.
Fellas, is it gay to dream of a future where you're married to your fellow soldier?- Whitepine Clowndoons, following their trench romance, their separation after the war, and then the moment they finally come together again.
Fucking Kill me Already (you emo bastard)- Boatboys Qpr college au where instead of getting help for their mental health, they brood about it together and get a little codependent- just for fun of course.
Ninjago Fics
So what is Romance Exactly?- Lloyd is aroace, and very confused by his brother's relationship. And just romance in general. Ft. brotherly bonding and Kai being helplessly in love with Zane.
Donnie Darko Fics
Dark lines- A look into Donnie's struggles with mental health and self harm.
You know I almost made a post earlier talking about the commentators instantly jumping to say Kimi lifted properly under the yellow flag and that he had "learned from George" and how insane that was compared to how horrible they were when George did the same thing but I decided just to let it go because there were bigger issues at the time and at least they were acknowledging that George was in fact correct.
But now that Kimi has a grid penalty for fucking it up? Let me tell you I am sat here laughing my ass off because oh Kimi you really thought. Hate to break it to you kid but you will never be George Russell.
The f1 community as a whole may be against him but George really is that bitch and none of the dumb shit people are saying can convince me otherwise.
I think anti tag is a cultural phenomenon that doesn't really exist anywhere else because we assume that people on Tumblr are conscious and capable of forming a thought. But maybe we are not so clear about what exactly are we using it for? Because anti Kimi tag in my particular case means something like that: I'm not rooting for the guy, his wins don't bring me joy, he comes off as unappealing to me because I heavily disagree with merc's narrative and Toto's management, I'm annoyed by his fanbase that doesn't do his position justice by babying him, his character doesn't match with my personal understanding of what a good pr storyline is, I don't find him relatable therefore my compassion is seriously limited, although I understand that it's Merc's fault and it's a disservice on their side to make him win with so little effort, turning many fans against him in the process, I also find it unsettling how insistent Toto is with him and think that it might not turn out well for him in the future. I don't hate him, don't wish him (god forbid) any harm, he's simply not my hero and rn certain sides of him are getting on my nerves and reopen my wounds as a gr63's fan
Did not feel like posting a 3-4k word article on why most of the reasons George Russell is disliked is just misogyny and bad branding, so here’s a really messy summary:
George is an androgynous male, meaning that he is judged by a different rulebook.
Male authority is reinforced by the exclusion of women and queer people and non-men, so therefore Russell (who is difficult to categorise by their standards) by merely existing is a threat to this culture.
Aside from having to deal with similar double standards that women face, he is not mellow, nor nurturing, nor soft-spoken, which means by the arbitrary standards of femininity he fails here too (therefore his femininity is less forgivable as it's the "wrong" type).
Russell does not protect the dominant culture surrounding the grid—he instead chooses to reveal many of the normalised behaviours that are commonplace (remember the “unnecessary anger and borderline violence” comment was in response to Max threatening to put his head through the wall. Personally I think it reasonable to be a little upset after that).
Russell has also worked to support the inclusion of women and non-men into the space.
He chooses to follow the rules of the sport, but not the tacit rules of the dominant culture.
In order to protect itself, the dominant culture then has to assert Russell as ‘weak’ or ‘emotional’ in order to make his refusal to follow seem unreasonable. If stripped of this primitive order of authority, many who traditionally benefit from the dominant culture won’t anymore so those who have the most to lose get the most aggressive (see: misogyny is a skill issue).
Most of the hate comments that Russell receives is misogynistic and homophobic in nature in aims to emasculate him (as to many of these men, the worst thing to be is a woman).
It further pisses people off when Russell is not offended or scared by the threat of emasculation, as it demonstrates that the dominant culture only holds so much power over him.
Men put down other men in order to assert their own masculinity.
Russell is difficult to categorise and understanding him and accepting him requires a level of being comfortable with grey area, challenging stereotypes, and facing biases. Many people don't do this and instead fear things they don't understand or cannot label.
Russell is also demonstrably intelligent and possess a high race-IQ. We all know how much people love people who are smarter than them, regardless of whether or not they flaunt it.
When Russell performs well, it challenges the idea that masculinity is required to be successful.
He suffers a double standard and is criticised for the same things other pilots are praised for.
Because people are threatened by his existence, they take it out on him.
Russell's visage is slightly alien—his face is interesting and otherworldly and slightly off-putting. He is not conventionally pretty. This influences the way people perceive him, and therefore ascribe traits to him such as ‘haughty’ and 'judgemental'.
Not saying this is the case for many people, but for a small, select group, finding him attractive is an indictment, and therefore in order to deal with these emotions they get angry at the thing that had inspired them.
Russell, coming from England (a country entrenched in classicism), has worked to shed markers of his upbringing in hopes of fitting into a higher social strata (eg. has refined his accent, matured his sense of style, reigned in any behaviour that could be seen as childish). This looks like a rejection of his upbringing, and to those who sit in the upper-class he aspires to join, he is seen as an intruder as he lacks certain social capital that cannot be faked.
Russell is careful with the media which makes him seem disingenuous. There is clear incongruity between candid appearances and promotional material, between when he is prepared to perform, and when he is not. His line of comfort is clear and it’s obvious when it’s been crossed.
He can be rather awkward when unprepared (I personally find this so endearing and relatable, but alas there are people who don't appreciate this) and clearly does not enjoy it.
Being on the off-foot also creates the conditions for him to be mocked, as Russell is not given a lot of leeway. His preparedness is a form of self-preservation.
Despite being called “emotional” and a “diva”, Russell is also simultaneously “robotic”. A lot of the criticism he receives is contradictory.
His vulnerability is carefully packed away which makes him unreachable to the audience. Social media’s promotion of parasocial relationships has created the expectation that people be available to their audiences at all times in all dimensions, Russell's refusal to participate is seen as a rejection of the audience.
Vulnerable moments on podcasts and interviews feel rehearsed and scripted.
He is polished and performs to the media, careful to never be caught off-guard, and therefore slightly untouchable. It is also nearly impossible to get an accurate read on his self-esteem.
Russell’s sponsorships try to minimise any traits of his that could cause friction or challenge the audience and dominant culture in hopes of rehabilitating his image and buying him membership.
They focus on Russell’s perfectionism, almost as if in a manner to apologise for his behaviour, and often place him in traditionally gendered roles (gardener, spy, athlete).
The result is some creation that isn’t quite Russell. His image is constantly shifting depending on through whose lens one views him. Therefore almost every version of him feels inauthentic.
Especially as Russell's behaviour suggests that he does not want to conform to the dominant culture, yet he is presented as if he wants membership into it (this further pisses off those within the sphere as it makes him seem like he's asking for special treatment).
Perfectionism is also a pitfall if he fails to meet these standards set upon him--his own image can therefore be used against him.
The result of all of the above (I imagine unintentionally too) is a disdainful and performative image that seems to shout 'I am better than you', instead of honesty, instead of admitting that he is scared.
His branding also avoids the fact that he cares deeply, and anything else that could present as any sort of vulnerability. He is carefully guarded.
Russell is not fragile, but like everyone he does have cracks in his mask. Instead of pressing on it, his PR tries to steer people away from even seeing them.
This coupled with the performative nature of branding ultimately helps none to remediate the way he is seen, as they can't root is image in some truth, and therefore it is unmoored.
What actually makes Russell compelling is often left as a footnote--an eager young boy willing to scar himself for his dream, someone who cares so so deeply about everything. Perhaps this is avoided due to PR limitations, perhaps possible identity issues on Russell's part.
As Wolff said, the drivers are all wounded children. Russell fights hard to protect his own wounded inner child.
also if you've searched a phrase from my work and you've been directed here, congrats. i summarised my own article
You know sometimes I remember when we all saw Mercedes like a happy little family with papa Toto and mama Susie and Kimi and George were like brothers and Dori and Fred were the fun cousins and everything was beautiful and I get sad because that could not be further from what is happening right now. I would like to go back to rpf delusion where everything is happy and fun and it is possible for team principals to not be evil but unfortunately now every time I think about him I just feel angry on George's behalf and not even rpf delusion can fix that.
First he ruins the car, then he ruins George's confidence, and now he's even ruined fanfic for me. Nothing is safe from him anymore 😔
Right and when they ask Toto what they're doing to support George he just spits out some nothing burger slop about how "Good ones always bounce back and George can." THATS NOT WHAT THE QUESTION WAS THE QUESTION WAS ABOUT WHAT YOU ARE DOING TO HELP HIM.
We already know George can bounce back, but he also needs the support of his fucking team and clearly you guys aren't helping him. Unbelievable.
see George is better than me because if I had to go do another race this weekend I would refuse to do any media interviews and instead livestream myself making threats of self-harm if my car issues weren’t fixed
Alright Toto "We fixed the issue with George's car he just needs to work on his driving" Wolff care to explain to me how George's car killing itself AGAIN is somehow George's fault or are you going to finally admit that you're wrong.
As a George fan I am suffering rn but as an Arvid fan I am thriving. Like oh no my driver is having the worst luck imaginable everything is awful- OH WAIT THERE GOES MY BABY GOAT ARVID HE IS COOKING RN🔥🔥🔥
Kimi getting his time deleted for track limits right after that article came out where he talked about needing to stop pushing track limits... admittedly quite funny. Like bro you just talked about this 2 days ago what are you doing lol. You literally have the best car on the grid you do not need to be doing all that 😭
But hey if it helps George I'll take it so keep going I guess lol.
Fred in the car confirming fully that it’s not just “George’s driving style” or “Kimi being better” but the cars being fundamentally different, that’s mamas little insider agent.
I think Frederik is a phenomenal driver with WDC level skill but no driver can jump into a car 4 times and instantly mimic the driving style of someone else- the fact he still had better straight line deployment than George despite George’s better lap time- it’s better but they have not fixed that fuckin deployment issue
Nah wdym the commentators are STILL blaming George's driving and are believing all the bs Toto said about George still needing to fix his driving????
Bro wdym he literally changed his entire driving style and it didn't fix shit there is no way it's not the fucking car bro. Like it's your job as a commentator to look to the data and the data clearly shows it's not his fault. I know they clearly don't like him or whatever but this is just crazy unprecedented shade for no reason. 😭
Like it's one thing to have a favorite driver as a commentator (cough cough kimi) but you cannot be this biased about it. Crazy work.
Like not to be that guy because obviously I'm biased towards George too but like... it's literally their job. They are paying them to provide accurate commentary as the average f1 fan just tunes into the race every week and doesn't really follow outside of that. George already revives a shit ton of hate from all the misogynistic bs we do not need to also be lying about him and making him seem like some horrible driver when he's doing nothing wrong. Like idc if people shit talk George or whtv in their own space cuz everyone's entitled to their own opinion, but when you are doing it on the official broadcast you hold authority and the average f1 fan is going to believe whatever you tell them. I'm not asking them to like lick his boots and sing his praises but at least don't talk down on him. Maybe we should just stick to the whole "if you don't have something nice to say don't say anything at all" rule.
I really do feel like this is why such a large part of the f1 community is so toxic and there's so much arguing because even the commentators are pushing it. It's one thing for them to get excited when drivers they like are doing well, it's another to bash a driver as if people who are fans of them aren't also watching the broadcast.
