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I’VE BEEN LAUGHING FOR 10 MINUTES NOW WHY

A few things I’ve learned

1. Happiness is a direct result of adaptability. If you expect an exact way of being and an exact set of standards to fit into every new space and situation you come across, you’re going to be disappointed. If you can’t be adaptable, you’ll end up anxious, angry and constantly let down. If you allow yourself to experience things fluidly, without trying to fit them to what you’re comfortable with, you’ll be much, much happier. You’ll have more friends, too. Be water, not ice. 2. Praise yourself. Becoming confidant was a lot like becoming a vegetarian. It’s hard at first and all you can think about is going back to your old ways of being because those ways feel easier. Sometimes you have to fake it until you make it. Tell everyone you’re vegetarian so that you can’t eat meat around them. Eventually you’ll be so used to not eating meat around those people, you won’t eat meat when you’re alone. Then you won’t want to eat meat at all. It’s a process. In the same way, tell people you love yourself (literally, say it aloud) and do things around them to prove it. Eventually you’ll create a habit of being confidant around those people. It’ll translate into other areas of your life and you’ll end up being more confidant overall. 3. Let people go. And don’t punish them or harbor anger toward them when they leave. This becomes a lot easier if, along with items one and two of this list, you peacefully acknowledge that every person is the main character of their life. People do not owe you anything and you do not owe people anything. They are not your side characters. People will leave when it is time for them to leave. That is the progression of life. If you can release them with a quiet spirit, that quietness will become a warm and tranquil place for new people to enter in.

#advice #confidance #happiness #life lessons #list #personal

Me @ so many people today

Zoo Lights 12/31/2015 It was bitter cold but so much fun. 💕

#ft. Seth

I signed the lease on the house yesterday! I get to move in on the 6th and the full Girl Squad is gonna be there because Maia and Katie are rooming with me! I just finished working out my budget for the year, complete with a safety net and travel savings so that I can go to Italy in 2017. I’m so excited~

Esmé Patterson set 1/2 MoCA Denver 12/23/15

Rooftop at the MoCA in Denver 12/23/15

Pretty/Dirty and MoCA architecture 12/23/15

Text from the Pretty/Dirty exhibit MoCA Denver, 12/23/15

The view from the top of the MoCA in Denver 12/23/15

Shoutout to Seth for the Wes Anderson pins and Flaffy for the Adventure Time pins. My boys are the best. I love this pack. :-)

#kanken #adventure time #wes anderson #pepe #fjallraven #fjallraven kanken #princess bubblegum #marceline the vampire queen #marceline

Happy Christmas Threeve, bitches ✨🎄

Polaroids from last night ft. me as Pidge

#see if you can spy the pic of seth and i ;-)

A brief summary of the DFS Holiday party

To you. Wherever you are.

I hope you’re doing well. Thank you for your musical influence. I’ve been exploring a lot of new sounds lately. I still fall asleep during movies and I’m constantly being roasted for not being able to finish more than one beer at a party. I’m all about gin shots and rum with coke. My diet is the same but I eat sushi from time to time. I can take you to all of the best places in Denver now - the real best places. Jazz bars, gardens, hole-in-the-wall food joints, theaters. I’ve seen 158 films since September 1st. That averages out to about 1.5 films per day. Most of them have been mediocre but some of them have impacted me to the point where I think I’m a very different person now. Mostly I’m happy. I think a lot of that comes from my not trying to force myself to be happy anymore. It took someone aggressively telling me that it’s okay for me to be happy all the time for me to be able to breathe again. Now that I can let the sadness out as needed, I feel like there’s more room in my chest for my lungs to expand. I know you never said that I had to be happy all of the time, but I felt like I did. With the release of one pressure comes another. Now, rather than a pressure to be happy, there’s a pressure to be confidant. A lapse of confidence in the crowd I run with these days is a strike on my permanent record. Nothing I do is wrong as long as I can back it up. I’ve almost started smoking cigarettes twice in the past few months. I think a mix of nostalgia, standing around with a crew that smokes, and a building addiction to second-hand smoke is causing it. I’m afraid to start so I probably won’t, but I find myself thinking about cigarettes a lot. I’ve lived a very unfamiliar lifestyle over the past 8-or-so months. I drifted through different circles for a long time. I didn’t feel like I belonged to any of them. My identity was “friend-of-a-friend”. I met some men I wish I hadn’t and a lot of the female influence in my life faded. I started staying away from home for weeks at a time. I started watching football. I learned how to mix drinks. I learned who would be there to take care of me when I’m trashed and a whole list of reasons as to why I’m not trash. I started walking more and I finally read Lolita. I’m still lazy and terrible at doing makeup. I always stop to pet dogs when I can. I’ve learned why women feel the need to become bitches and I’ve fought for feminism tooth-and-nail. I suppose I could be called a bitch. I call out bullshit when I see it and I don’t let people walk over me. You roast me I roast you right back. But I still have one of the highest customer service ratings and I still take a lot to heart. My sense of humor hasn’t gotten any better, but I think it helped me land a job. One of my friends almost died. Twice. I spent a lot of time in the hospital during the season of autumn. I spent just as much time being held while I cried. Things never seem real until they’re hanging in a door frame and you have to touch them with your mascara-streaked hands. Now there are a couple of hotlines I know by heart. People take care of me and I take care of them. Most of the time my life feels surreal due to the fast pace. The number of hours I spend at home on any given day can usually be counted on one hand. I don’t sleep enough or eat enough but people are starting to learn my name. I’ve fallen in love twice which just goes to show that there are soulmates - lots of them. I hope you’ve found some. If you have, I hope they stay with you for a long time. And if they don’t, I hope you remember that there are more out there for you. You’re gonna grow a lot. Most of that growth is going to be away from people you know, but that’s okay. Each vine contains a new cluster of buds that will flower. You will never be alone if you don’t want to be. There will always be someone. Keep growing.

Henderson's silhouettes

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