PC: The Decadent Chocolate Soda
Every year, Jones Soda Co. makes a holiday pack and each year there’s some gag flavor that’s awful: gravy, turkey, etc. They’re a fun little gag thing.
This is not a fun gag thing. This is a downright cruel joke of a beverage, something you’ll give as a present to a person you never want to speak to again.
PC isn’t known for it’s pop. They’re basically a house brand, making slightly cheaper versions of pop that basically taste the same (all pop tastes the same to me, anyway). In so many words, they’re the generic painkiller to Pepsi’s Advil.
You’d think chocolate pop would taste bad. You’d be wrong, it tastes worse than that. It doesn’t even taste like either, really. Served neat, it tastes like off brand chocolate syrup mixed with stale club soda. On the rocks, it’s sickly sweet, with a weird burnt aftertaste. Because it’s carbonated, it has this strange texture: chocolate isn’t supposed to be fizzy. And the chocolate-tasting burps it’s giving me aren’t helping, either.
The gag Jones Sodas come in small bottles and as part of a pack. This thing comes in a massive one litre bottle. I found it sitting on top of a bunker by frozen Dim Sum entrees and frozen turkeys. When I bought it, I wondered why it was stashed away over there; this wasn’t anywhere near the pop.
After having a glass, I think I know why: this awful, awful drink is enough to turn anyone away from fizzy drinks.
I suspect the PC Chocolate Soda is only here for the holiday season. I hope so, anyway. It’s the perfect gift for someone you don’t care about.
What I paid: $0.99 for a one-litre bottle
What’d I do with it: threw it in the trash
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