i actually hate so bad how people refuse to understand the dynamics of the sully family in fire and ash.
as a girl with a shit father, let's please stop acting like jake is the worst father to ever be. like we are not existing in the context right now. like first of all his son fucking died, second of all he is in the midst of war and as toruk makto it's kind of his job to be in charge and give orders. and like, military mindset does not leave you. he was a marine, he still acts like a marine (also speaking as someone who had ex-military family members). believe it or not most veterans still retain some of their habits and attitudes from when they were on active duty.
and going back to the grief thing, it's complicated and complex as hell. y'all are so desperate for the perfect victims istg. grief makes you say things you don't mean, grief makes you irrational. why are we expecting someone like JAKE SULLY to be the most perfect amazing father in one of the worst moments of his life. like his first son is gone. and honestly it's just bad media literacy to entirely blame lo'ak's attempt on jake alone. both jake and lo'ak internally feel responsible for neteyam's death in some capacity. yes, jake's words were the catalyst to his choice (and i'm not saying jake is blameless), but clearly there were boiling feelings there already.
we're giving jake so much shit for saying irrational things because of grief, but we almost totally ignore neytiri's faults, noting the entire argument jake and neytiri had. like yes, neytiri's hatred for humans is 100% justified, but for her to hate—hate is the keyword here— her children's human-adjacent flaws is not. because those are her *children*. and additionally, she chose to mate for life with a human.
and once again, we need to exist in the context a bit here. men are historically bad at emotional expression. it's a product of the patriarchy. jake sully is a product of the patriarchy. and the military isn't exactly known for improving this skill among men. it's a lot of desensitization and toughening up.
it's like everyone gets amnesia and forgets that twow and faa take place during wartime for the na'vi people. like they are at war with the sky people. this shit is life or death. and jake, as a leader in this war, is in survival mode. he's trying to protect his family— with a target on his back, mind you— in the midst of war. and let us not forget that sometimes lo'ak needed to be scolded. he was impulsive, he didn't think things through, he seldom followed instructions and more often than not it landed them into trouble. and in the context of the story those traits can be dangerous, and even fatal. like let's not sit here and act like jake wasn't being at least a little rational. we only see the dynamic of the current sully family in the context of war, minus the flashback scenes from when they were much younger. and in those scenes, jake acts just like any father would. he loves and dotes on his kids, he plays with them, he's attentive and affectionate, etc etc. he clearly wasn't always strict and orderly, it's simply because of the context of the film.
you can call a lot of men bad fathers, but jake sully is not one of them.
blakekathryn
amandla
s-u-f-j-a-n-s-t-e-v-e-n-s
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