so tonight I’m at synagogue, listening to the Purim Night reading of the Book of Esther, like you do
and near the end of this chapter my brain presents me with the following:
nooooo ooooone plots like Haman calls the shots like Haman plans a genocide by casting lots like Haman
(It only works with the Hebrew pronunciation of Haman, which, like Gaston, is accented on the second syllable.)
By the time we get home my brain has added:
for there’s none so well-favored and kingly yes, we all can be certain of that he’s so rich that his pockets are jingly and he looks really sharp in a three-cornered hat
*face in hands*
Petition to sing this every year at Purim.
I shared this with my dad, and he added:
No one’s spruce as Haman, Nor abstruse as Haman; No one’s half as good tying a noose as Haman! He’ll use gallows in all of his decorating! No one else hangs as well as Haman!
niiiiice
i know several people who will definitely appreciate this.
this is beautiful
oh wait
When I was a lad I hatched four dozen plots Every morning, to raise myself high… And now that I’m grown I hatch five dozen plots So all those who oppose me shall die!
Oy, what a goy, that Haman!
*SPLUTTERS*
@neubauje
Happy Purim everyone!
ok so i may have gone a little extra, as is my specialty, and conglomerated all the verses together plus a few of my own to make a full song (minus the more chit-chatty bits in the original disney song)
please do not ask me why i did this, as i do not know anyways here’s a thing Nooooo ooooone plots like Haman Calls the shots like Haman Plans a genocide by casting lots like Haman “For there’s none so well-favored and kingly Yes, we all can be certain of that!” He’s so rich that his pockets are jingly And he looks really sharp in a three-cornered hat! No one’s loud like [insert noisemakers] Draws a crowd like [more noise] Nor demands people near him be bowed like [booing] “As the king’s right-hand man, why, it’s liberating!” Oy, what a goy, that Haman! ... “When I was a lad I hatched four dozen plots Every morning, to raise myself high… And now that I’m grown I hatch five dozen plots So all those who oppose me shall die!” No one’s strife like Haman Has a life like Haman Whoops! He went and pissed off the king’s wife, that Haman... For there’s none quite so anti-Semitic At least not for like, maybe, five years But Mordecai, he’s quite the critic May Queen Esther’s reveal be the last thing he hears! No one’s spruce as Haman Nor abstruse as Haman No one’s half as good tying a noose as Haman! He’ll use gallows in all of his decorating! No one else hangs as well as Haman!
