In fall of 2013 I was wrapping up my first semester of grad school in Austin. It was HARD and I was struggling a LOT. I stumble, outrageously sleep deprived and bitter and grumpy into Research Methods - a class we all had to take to start us thinking about the thesis we would write in our final year.
So I stumble crankily into Research Methods, and our professor Dr. Megan, among the finest and most beloved of all living humans, announces that today is “Carpe Diem Day!” She pronounces that we must only be scholars, but artists, and in order to be artists we cannot cannot cannot neglect INSPIRATION. She tells us our grade today is based on going out into the world and doing something we’ve never done before, taking a picture of it, and sending it to her.
My mind boggled as my classmate’s eyes lit up with surprise and delight. They bolted from the classroom like it was The Great Race and untold riches awaited when they completed this challenge. “HEY!” I shouted after them, but only in my head, “ISN’T ANYONE GOING TO MENTION THAT DIEM MEANS DAY? AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO’S BOTHERED BY THE FACT THAT SHE’S CALLING THIS CARPE DAY DAY? Apparently I was, and apparently I was the only one who would have preferred the extra 90 minutes of sleep instead dragging my miserable self to campus.
The photo above was my Carpe Diem photo from that day. Yes, it was amazing and inspiring. Yes, this is one of my favorite photos of myself. Yes, I eventually started to “let go and let Megan” a lot more willingly. And I am deeply changed because of it. Thank god.
Some time later one of my dear friends in that class started the Carpe Diem Project tumblr, where she invited 3 guest bloggers to do an entire month of daily day seizing. A new thing every day, and a post about it every day.
The month of daily new things proved hard and rewarding. As expected, it encouraged me to go outside of my comfort zone and seek new experiences. That’s rad, sure. Not so expected was the way in which I (probably initially out of my habitual lazy loophole-seeking) discovered how many new things I do every day, and how many opportunities to embrace new experiences, large and small, I encounter with even minimal effort.
I’m at a moment in my life where I am attempting to figure out what makes me happy. I don’t mean like capital H happy, like a happy and fulfilled human in a sustainable way (though if that happens, bonus!). I just mean even like...enjoy or experience a sense of true pleasure or fulfillment from. One surprising and simple theory I’d like to explore is that I actually like learning stuff. Stuff about myself, stuff about others, stuff about the world....I have curiosity and I enjoy the process of discovery! Hey! How about that? That’s the least fatalistic and macabre thing you’ve said all week! Let’s lean into that, shall we?
So! Carpe November is upon us. A new thing every day, and a post - leaning into learning via the new and sometimes uncomfortable. I am ready ready ready. My new thing for today was starting this blog. Or, re-starting as the case may be. AND RE-STARTING FOR THE FIRST TIME COUNTS AS NEW! Thanks for reading!