we were born as ghosts

Casey Stewart is a 22 year old woman and a resident of Roanoke Colony. Ever since her chip was damaged, Casey has been harbouring an intense need to bring The Agency down. You will most likely find her in The Hub, where she works, or training for the approaching war. disclaimer: this is a rp blog. none of the gifs posted here are my own.

[casey-stewart]

Just Breathe | Casey&Eric

Even though her training had only started a few months ago, Casey could already notice a big difference in herself. The physical aspects of her coaching were doing wonders for her body; toning and strengthening, utilizing muscles she didn’t even know existed until recently. 

She threw her fists into the punch bag, first left then right then left again. 

Since she and Eric had agreed to leave work at the door, Casey became more careful with how she chose to spend her time. He’d opened her eyes to the fact that she was getting swept up in all the knowledge Meg and Evan had to offer at the cost of their relationship. She’d felt ashamed for hurting him.

Pausing to steady the bag and take a deep breath, Casey noticed a familar figure approaching in her peripheral vision.

“Hey,” she said, a genuine smile lighting up her face. “I thought we weren’t meeting ‘til later?” She had half a mind to walk right up to Eric and kiss him, but wasn’t sure if he’d appreciated being covered in her sweat. It didn’t even matter to her that there were other people nearby - everyone knew about the two of them.

[mercer-gauss]

No, just made the mistake of going outside. Olivia said something about fresh air. Shouldn’t have listened.

[casey-stewart]

If she said that it’d be good for you then she was right. 

[mercer-gauss]

Children are so loud. Why are they so damn loud?

[casey-stewart]

Got kids running around your office, Mercer?

[casey-stewart]

Making Amends | Eric&Casey

[ericxwagner]

Eric had spent the afternoon on the couch, watching the shadows on the wall shift from one side of the room to the other as the sun moved across the sky before setting. Another day gone and another day he was left wondering how so much had gone wrong between him and the woman who’d given him a chance at a relationship and a dream he’d had since she’d posted herself in the hub years before. 

But it was always easier to accept her views as her own when there was nothing to propel it forward. Kenneth had been a catalyst and now he would lose her, and the idea terrified him. Enough to the point where he’d become more selfish than he could imagine. He wanted things his way for the first time in forever, and it was so unlike him that he didn’t even recognize himself anymore. 

The knock at the door pulled him from his thoughts and he looked to it for a long moment before getting up and making his way across the living room. He opened it just a crack ready to tell Ryan to leave him be and go to the saloon alone. But it wasn’t Ryan at the door. It was Casey. The last person he’d expected to see and suddenly the only person he knew he needed to see in that moment. 

He stood there watching her for a long moment, letting nostalgia was over him thinking about the times they’d spent together in his home, the good times that now seemed so far away and just out of his grasp. “Hey,” he said trying to hide the crack in his voice as he stepped aside to allow her in.

[casey-stewart]

From the look on Eric’s face it was clear that he hadn’t been expecting to find Casey on his doorstep, or at least, he’d expected to see someone else entirely. She couldn’t really blame him. Casey wasn’t known to ask for forgiveness or approach someone with her tail between her legs. Things were a little different when it came to Eric, however. 

“Hey,” she replied, hesitating ever so slightly before stepping over the threshold and entering the apartment. After he closed the door, she stood opposite him in silence, eyes looking anywhere but at Eric’s face. Casey couldn’t bring herself to meet his gaze just yet, no matter how much she wanted too. The look on his face the other day kept reappearing in Casey’s mind, reminding her that it was potentially too late to fix what she’d done.

“I came here to...” Casey wasn’t even sure how to finish that sentence. Had she come to apologise? To explain away her recent behaviour? To beg him to let her fight for their future? It was all so frustrating. She ran her fingers through her dark hair, trying to figure out a way to speak to him properly. 

“I’ve missed you, okay?” she stated with a shrug, finally meeting his eyes. “And I know that doesn’t excuse what I’ve done, I know that I’ve hurt you by not being around and I want to make up for that but I don’t know how.” Casey took a deep breath and waited for him to say something, anything. “Just tell me how.” She hoped he wouldn’t ask her to stop training with Evan and Meg.

[casey-stewart]

Making Amends | Eric&Casey

Casey struggled to get the fight with Eric out of her head. It hadn’t been their first argument and she doubted very much that it would be their last, but it stayed with her in a way that the couple’s previous disagreements didn’t. Maybe it was because, deep down, she knew he was right. She had been consumed by her desire to learn everything she could from Evan and Meg, by her drive to see The Agency taken down once and for all. She was putting Eric second when any sane person would have been putting him first. It had been hard to accept. Casey was stubborn by nature, unwilling to relent or abandon her beliefs at the drop of a hat. 

Although she knew that her efforts to become a soldier in the war against Fox and his army were hurting Eric, Casey didn’t want to give up on her need to fight just because he was afraid of losing her. Nothing they did was without risk. The colony’s very existence was one massive risk and, although she had faith in the system they had in place and the technology they used to keep themselves hidden, there was always a chance that Roanoke would be discovered. 

After moving from one room of her apartment to another for several hours in an attempt to tire herself out, the soldier-in-training finally gave up. The last thing on her mind was sleep. She had to see Eric, despite the late hour. Casey needed to make it up to him. She just wasn’t sure how. 

She pulled her cardigan tightly around her body, shivering in response to the chilly air, as she made her way just a few buildings down. Something made her hesitate in front of Eric’s door, suddenly remembering that the last time she’d been there was just before Kenneth’s funeral. Eric had been in pieces and Casey’d had no idea what to do or say to console him. 

Steeling herself, Casey rapped three times on the door, hoping that Eric would answer.

[ericxwagner]

It feels like it! I’ve barely seen you since the funeral, and I thought… I just… I thought it would have made you see that spending time with the people you… care about, is important. 

[casey-stewart]

I...

[ericxwagner]

Kenneth didn’t give them anything. We know that much from when they brought Meg back here. Meg, who by the way, is teaching you to get yourself killed. I’m not trying to stop you… I just want you to see that what we have here isn’t as temporary as you make it out to be.

… unless it is… that temporary.

[casey-stewart]

Meg is teaching us how to not get killed, that’s kind of the point. She and Evan know what they’re doing and with them leading us we have a real chance.

There is nothing temporary about my feelings for you. 

[ericxwagner]

You could make a difference here! With me… where it’s safe. We’ve all lost so much… I’m tired of losing people.

[casey-stewart]

Safe? Safe for how much longer, Eric? Who knows what they did to Kenneth before they killed him, what information they got. The longer we sit around the more time they have to find us, and if they find us there won’t be a here. We will lose everything.

[ericxwagner]

It’s—

It’s not doing nothing, Casey. Is that what you think? That I do nothing?

[casey-stewart]

That’s not what I meant! You’re fine with living in the colony, continuing as normal but I can’t just stay here when I could be out there making a difference

[ericxwagner]

We all have a purpose here, Casey. We’re alive and free of the chip. That’s our purpose. To show that humanity is this…

We don’t have to fight for that. We already have it. We already have purpose.

[casey-stewart]

I wish I could believe that, Eric. I wish I could be content with doing nothing, but I don’t know how. 

[ericxwagner]

You’ve always had me, Case. I’m here, I showed up. I’ve never gone anywhere.

[casey-stewart]

I know. And I’ve been too distracted to see that. I just can’t help but feel like I finally have purpose around here.

[ericxwagner]

What else did you want?

[casey-stewart]

You. 

[ericxwagner]

It’s true. You’ve wanted to fight The Agency since you got here. Never had the following… and now you do. This is what you’ve always wanted.

[casey-stewart]

Okay, you’re right. But I certainly didn’t want it at the expense of anyone’s life.

It wasn’t the only thing I wanted, you know, but I guess I can’t have both.

[ericxwagner]

Me? I’m fine. I’m not training for war. How are you? You know, getting what you’ve always wanted?

[casey-stewart]

Getting what I- ...

That’s not fair.

[ericxwagner]

Yeah, I noticed. Haven’t seen you at work really, or around these past few days. I was starting to forget what you look like.

[casey-stewart]

I know, I’m sorry. How are you?

[thefaulted-butterfly-blog]

It’d be… better if it was busy. I mean I don’t want people hurt.. I just, I don’t know. It’s overwhelming.

[casey-stewart]

I know what it’s like to want to keep busy. If it’s really quiet why don’t you come over to the training center? There might not be too many injuries for you to take care of but at least you’d get to see Ryan fall on his ass.

[ericxwagner]

Training?

[casey-stewart]

It’s all I seem do these days. 

Not that I’m complaining.