Letter To My Younger Self (and why you need to write one).
Do you ever empathise with the hamster in his wheel, running and running and getting nowhere fast? I know that feeling too well.
If you find yourself repeating similar (unpleasant) situations over and over, chances are life will keep on setting them up for you, until you learn whatever lesson you’re supposed to from the experience. Only then can you grow a little as a person (or a lot depending on the lesson!) and move on to bigger, better things.
Over the past couple of years, I’ve noticed history repeating itself in my life and I made a real effort to analyse why (typical Aquarian, I over analyse everything). One method I stumbled upon to help break negative cycles was the ‘Letter To Your Younger Self / Inner Child’. OK, it sounds a bit weird at first, but when you get your head around the concept and start writing, it really is therapeutic.
The beauty of writing to your younger self/inner child, or whatever you resonate best with, is you have the chance to re-write your beliefs and start over from now – in whatever areas of life you want to improve. Treat it as an exercise to tell yourself anything and everything you would want to know about life as if you were your own parent. Offer yourself guidance in the areas of your life you feel you’ve been struggling with, and be kind to yourself.
If you fancy giving it a go and want an example, here’s my letter to my younger self:
Dear Little Me,
How are things going? As your future self, I know you better than anyone. I’ve shared all of your joy, your pain, your successes and your failures along the way, so, I thought it couldn’t hurt to offer you some advice for your journey (seeing as I’ve learnt the lessons for you!).
As a little girl, your imagination is your greatest tool and you love using it to create – be it imaginary worlds for your toys to live in, or attempting to write your ‘Magic Tree’ book! It’s easy as you grow older to lose touch with your sense of imagination and easy to forget how to take pleasure in the simplest of things. Try to remember you are always creating, through your thoughts and your actions, so never stop daring to dream.
Your parents are devoted to caring for, supporting and protecting you, and all they want is for you to grow up with good morals, feeling happy and safe. That’s wonderful, and you will realise how lucky you are to have such a stable, secure upbringing (once you’re out of your ‘teenager knows best’ phase!).
The lessons that you learn from your parents, your school teachers and society in general are what shape your inner belief system, so you move into adulthood with a hard-wired subconscious set of standards by which to live your life. Some of these will serve you well (treat people respectfully, don’t break the law and so on), while others have the potential to hold you back at times.
For example, you come from a decent, hard-working family, where the pattern has always been that as long as there’s enough money to pay the bills and put food on the table that’s all you need. Yes, it’s important to appreciate everything you have (even when you’re working in that soul destroying call centre job) but don’t let yourself be held back by self-imposed limitations.
The only limits to what you can achieve are the ones lodged in your subconscious – so when you find yourself feeling stuck, frustrated or unhappy - take time to get to the root of why you feel that way. Then make it your mission to ‘re-programme’ your beliefs, let yourself believe you can change career path, attract the right people into your life etc and the more you start to believe it – the sooner it will happen.
Relationships are all about balance. You’ll have your ‘not my finest hour’ moments of not treating others how you expect to be treated, and you’ll experience the pain of being lied to and betrayed (call that karma). Ever the optimist, you continue the search for the fairytale ‘Happy Ever After’.
Enjoy the dizzying high points of grand romantic gestures, promises of commitment and declarations of unconditional love and learn from the tough times, and remember love is ALWAYS a work in progress. There is no ‘finish line’ where the prince sweeps the princess off her feet, they still have to work at it and like anything else in life – you get back what you put into it.
Think of life as a mirror – it reflects back what you focus on as real life experiences. So don’t take life too seriously all the time, or you’ll find yourself in serious situations – now where’s the joy in that?! When things get overwhelming, don’t wallow in the moment, have a word with yourself and go do something that cheers you up – you’ll be amazed how life responds and good things start to come your way.
The key to happiness lies in the power of your own mind. When something bad happens, ditch the habit of reacting in auto-pilot mode – getting angry or upset because you feel that’s the justified response is never going to make you feel better about it in the end.
People only have as much influence over you and your state of mind as you allow them to have. Dishing out negative energy will always find its way back to you somehow (remember the mirror!). Practice the art of forgiveness and I guarantee it will set you on the path to peace and tranquillity. Be present in the moment and you will learn how to use the power of your thoughts and feelings to create what you want in life.
Remember I’m always here if you need someone to talk to or advice, that little voice inside your head you often ignore!
Love Always,
Your Future Self x
