The Unfiltered Version

Learning To Love | The Raw and Real.

[chanellefreetobe]

2019, Be ready for dreams coming true.✨

[chanellefreetobe]

Seven Years Clean & Sober.

Dear 7 Years,

My eyes can’t help but fill with tears.

What a journey.

June 13th, the date I will never forget.

The day I chose to leave what I thought was my safety net.

To numb and escape, that’s all I knew.

Get drunk and high, that’s all I wanted to do.

What a journey.

The emptiness and pain, all the rage inside.

All the shame I felt, I just wanted to hide.

I didn’t know any better, deep down I wanted to change.

“There must be more to this, maybe I need to rearrange?”

What a journey.

Hopeless and lost, looking for a way out.

God-sent angels who were friends, that’s without a doubt.

June 13th, the day I chose to say yes.

No matter the pain, no matter the mess.

What a journey.

I didn’t know it yet, but this would be a new life for me.

The more I started to heal, the more I started to see.

I was created for love, life, and freedom.

Escapism and numbing? I don’t need’em!

What a journey.

Dear 7 years, we did it.

We lived life to the fullest, every. Last. Minute!

I’ll always remember, and I’ll always celebrate.

It’s not a small thing, it carries some weight.

What a journey.

You see it’s not even about no drinking or drugs.

It’s about a way of life, it’s about a heart tug.

I want to live in the moment, no distraction or crutch.

Every sense, every feeling, every taste, every touch.

Dear 7 years, we did it! But He lead the way.

Jesus was with me through it all, and He will always stay.

What a journey.

But it’s not over yet.

Healing of the heart, and a changed mindset.

I’m ready for you, 7 years to come.

I can promise you this, I’m not going forward numb.

#SevenYearsCleanAndSober #ThankYouJesus #StayingPresent #Freedom #WeDidIt

[chanellefreetobe]

What 2017 Taught Me.

Going into 2018, I’ve read a lot of posts about 2017 being one of the hardest years of people’s lives and I am definitely on that train. I was really excited to see 2017 end, and never have to see it again. But God quickly helped me to see that through the hard times came lessons that I will never forget. Lessons that helped shape me into the woman I was created to be.

I’ve spent too long running from the hard things in life, not realizing that they were the areas I had learned most about myself and God. To tell you the truth, I spent most of the year fighting through bitterness and anger for the things that had happened. But today I’m thankful for them. I am especially thankful for the things I’ve learned…

I’ve learned that my feelings matter.

I’ve learned to stay true to who I am, even when others may not understand.

I’ve learned that loving God and others starts with myself. My compacity for love starts within.

I’ve learned that I have a voice and that my voice matters.

I’ve learned that true vulnerability takes trust, and trust has to be built.

I’ve learned that I can trust myself.

I’ve learned that hurting people, hurt people and most of the time, it’s not personal.

I’ve learned that performance will always lead to burn out, and that being real can be messy sometimes.

I’ve learned more than ever that I am enough, not because of what I do or don’t do, but because of who I am.

I’ve learned that being present is the best gift you could gift to yourself and others.

I’ve learned that everyone struggles. Those struggles look different for everyone, but that should never change the way I love them.

I’ve learned that I want to focus on loving and knowing others, not changing them. True love brings change and His name is God.

I’ve learned true friendships this year. Not the pretend kind, the real kind. The safe, love you exactly the way you are today kind.

I’ve learned what I want in a man, and not to settle for anything less than.

I’ve learned that it’s okay to want those things, to believe for those things. That they are not too good to be true.

I’ve learned that love is choice. It’s not something that I can fall in and out of.

I’ve learned that family is important.

I’ve learned that the opinions of others are always changing, and trying to make everyone understand is exhausting. God has my reputation.

I’ve learned that love and relationship can be risky, but I will always choose to take the risk because whether the relationship works out or not, it’s always worth it.

I’ve learned that having fun, and eating good food, with good people is a necessity for me.

I’ve learned more than ever this year that sometimes I care way too much, and that’s okay. Its what I do with it that’s important.

I’ve learned that letting go can be tough, but good for the soul.

I’ve also learned that holding on can be greater opportunities for growth, different seasons call for different things.

I’ve learned about bitterness, a little too closely for my liking.

I’ve learned more about forgiveness, through unforgiveness, if I’m being real.

I’ve learned that healing takes time. Being patient with yourself is important.

I’ve learned a crazy amount about perspective and how it can change everything in one second if you let it.

I’ve learned lots about beauty inside of pain.

I’ve learned that through one of the hardest years of my life with God, I can learn so many incredible things.

I’ve learned not to curse the things that made me stronger, because without them I wouldn’t be who I am today.

And I am learning to be proud of that.

But most importantly, I continue to learn how to love.

That’s truly all I want for 2018.

I want to learn how to love.

And maybe a new kitchen, but mostly love. ;)

So here’s to a new year, a year filled with learning to love. <3

2018, I’m stoked for you.

[chanellefreetobe]

Love Through The Mess. 

Have you ever distanced yourself from a friend when they were going through something you didn’t understand?

I have.

Maybe you weren’t sure how to handle a certain situation. You didn’t want to hurt anyone, so you removed yourself all together.

I’ve done that too.

There’s been many times that I have turned away from a loved ones mess because I didn’t understand it, or knew I couldn’t fix it.

I was afraid.

Why are we so afraid of the mess?

The lies, insecurities, and stress.

Its fear, and it’s not the heart of Jesus.

When a friend is struggling with an addiction..

When a family member is always fighting..

When a leader “falls”..

Why are we afraid of that?

Maybe you haven’t been.. but I have.

“What if I don’t have the answers??”

“What if I make a mistake?”

"What will people think? I don't know if I want to partake.."

“I’ll just pray for them.”

Mess’ can be confusing and out of your control.

They can hurt.. A LOT!

But that's not the gaol.

They can bring division..

But only if we let them!

God is bigger than confusion..

Fear is just an illusion.

He Is way bigger than the mess!

Emotions.

Sin.

Addictions.

Whatever the mess may be..

Failure.

Mistakes.

Disagreements.

Hurts.

He’s not afraid of "the worst."

Like open sores, we think that mess’ are contagious..

That they can infect us if we get too close..

It sounds a little outrageous..

Take a second to think..

When did Jesus ever love safely?!

He touched the lepers and they were healed..

Jesus went where no one else would go!

Hung out with the "unclean."

Even shared a meal.

He saw passed the sin, and He loved them back to life.

He came for the sick, even those that caused strife.

His heart was for the broken, not those that were well.

The ones that need a saviour, the ones that can tell.

So why are we so afraid of the mess??

Those in the church who are struggling..

Our friends who just need love..

Not because of what they have done, or not done..

But because of who they are.

Acceptance and love don’t mean you have to approve..

No one is asking you to approve..

Just love..

Make the move.

Jesus does the same for you.

We love because He first loved us.

It's what compels us!

You don’t have to have all the answers..

You don’t have to always have something to say..

Just love.

Let Him pave the way.

Let them know they aren’t alone.

We are our brothers keeper, our life is not our own.

Sometimes things need to get messy before they get put back together..

Just trust the process.

Be a friend.

Be a brother.

Be a mother, a son or a daughter.

If they push you away because they’re ashamed..

Love them anyways.

If they’re angry, let them be angry..

Love them anyways.

If they don’t want to talk, sit in silence..

Love them anyways.

If they reject you, it's not about you..

Love them anyways.

Everyone’s mess looks different, and that’s okay.

Just love.. it’s really that simple.

Take it day by day.

Let’s be those that love like Jesus loves.

It starts in the church.

They will know us by our love.

Even when it hurts.

That friend who’s struggling?

They will know us by our love.

That family member who’s fighting?

They will know us by our love.

That leader who fell?

They will know us by our love.

God doesn’t love us only when we make a correction.

He loves us in the midst..

Because He knows the root is deception.

Its only when you know that you are loved in the behavior, that you can change..

Because His love is bigger.

It's an exchange.

God loves you right now, right where you are in this moment.

Even if you never change.

Shame isn't your component.

Once we realize that..

The mess will just become a beautiful process.

So let’s put our walls down..

Step out of that zone of comfort.

There are people around you that are hurting..

Friends, Family, Leaders..

Let’s start with them!

I promise you won’t get infected..

God is way bigger then that!

Let's believe for them.

Let's lower the mat.

All we have to do is show up, and God will do the rest.

They will know us by our love.

Especially when we love through the mess.

That friend that I distanced myself from?

Let's just say she didn't run.

She chose to love me through my mess, though she walked through hers alone.

She met me at my lowest, and showed me a love I've never known.

I ran away in fear because I didn't understand.

Yet she loved me through my mess, and then took me by the hand.

She reminded of who I was in the midst of it all.

And loved like Jesus loves, even in my downfall.

That's when I knew I would no longer be afraid of the mess.

He's a Good Father, it's all part of the process.

I met Jesus through my friend, like I never have before.

It's a radical love, and the church needs more.

They will know us by our love..

That's what we always say..

So the question is..

Who needs your love today?

[chanellefreetobe]

Alicia Keys - Holy War (Audio)

New music from Alicia Keys. "Holy War" from the new album "HERE"! Get it on: Apple Music: http://smarturl.it/iAKHERE?IQid=yt Spotify: http://smarturl.it/sAKH...

What If Love Was Holy, and Hate Was Obscene? 

[chanellefreetobe]

That’s a Wrap. Stay Tuned :) 

[chanellefreetobe]

I can’t say enough about this band, this song, and these lyrics. #ThemeSongInThisSeason #NEEDTOBREATHE #BestBandEver #HardLove

"HARD LOVE"

Trading punches with the heart of darkness Going to blows with your fear incarnate Never gone until it's stripped away A part of you has gotta die today

In the morning you gon' need an answer Ain't nobody gonna change the standard It's not enough to just feel the flame You've gotta burn your old self away

Hold on tight a little longer What don't kill ya, makes ya stronger Get back up, 'cause it's a hard love You can't change without a fallout It's gon' hurt, but don't you slow down Get back up, 'cause it's a hard love

You know the situation can't be right And all you ever do is fight But there's a reason that the road is long It take some time to make your courage strong

Hold on tight a little longer What don't kill ya, makes ya stronger Get back up, 'cause it's a hard love You can't change without a fallout It's gon' hurt, but don't you slow down Get back up, 'cause it's a hard love

When the wolves come and hunt me down I will face them all and stand my ground 'Cause there's a fire burnin' in me They will see my strength in this love I found Oh

Hold on tight a little longer What don't kill ya, makes ya stronger Get back up, 'cause it's a hard love You can't change without a fallout It's gon' hurt, but don't you slow down Get back up, 'cause it's a hard love

It's a hard love...

Hold on tight a little longer What don't kill ya, makes ya stronger Get back up, 'cause it's a hard love You can't change without a fallout It's gon' hurt, but don't you slow down Get back up, 'cause it's a hard love 'Cause it's a hard love

[chanellefreetobe]

I Can.

All these dreams...

All the purpose..

Can I really do it?

Is it really for me?

All the promises..

The destiny words..

Are they really mine?

What if I can't Will God choose someone else?

Maybe He should choose someone else..

I feel like I'm screaming on the inside.

What does that scream sound like?

“I CAN'T!”

I can't even get my God time under control, let alone all the other things He has called me to do.

Being a leader?

I feel like I need one more than anything.

Love people?

I struggle with loving myself..

Help others with their problems?

Shouldn't I know what to do with my own first?

Being a light?

I feel like I'm stumbling around in the darkness sometimes.

There's that scream again.

"I CAN'T!"

Should I listen to the scream?

Or should I just ignoring it and keep going?

Will it always feel this way?

I know sometimes your feelings lie to you but, why do they feel so real?

Sometimes I feel like it would be so much easier to just give in..

What if I disappoint?

What if I hurt people?

Does everyone deal with this?

Why don't people talk about it?

Maybe I should wait and get myself sorted out first.

That way I won't hurt anyone along the way.

That way I'll be stronger.

I won't disappoint.

I should wait until I have myself together.

But what if that's a lie?

“It is a lie.”

What if, I can?

What if I'm just around the corner from a breakthrough?

Is there anyone that is always put together before they accomplish things in God?

Can God really use broken people for His glory?

“Yah I can.”

He has before.

If I look back on my life, it's when I was the most broken, that He got the most glory.

It's when I felt weak, that He showed His power through me.

It's so opposite of what I've been taught all of my life...

I hear this soft still voice inside..

"I'm not afraid of your struggles."

I am not my struggles.

I hear it again..

"Let me into your fears."

I'm not alone in this.

Gods not afraid of my mess.

He's right there with me, even in the struggles.

He knew my struggles before He chose me.

I am not my struggles.

The only reason I am here is because He brought me here.

He sees the bigger picture.

He knows who I really am.

I can.

I can hear Him speaking again..

"I'm here with you."

I'm not alone in this.

He knows me.

He loves and accepts me just the way I am.

Right now in this very moment.

I can.

I don't have to be perfect.

He's perfect in me.

It's okay to be broken.

He turns it into beauty.

I can.

I can because, He did.

I am a light.

Because He's the light.

I can love people because He loves me.

If I do disappoint, I'll point my eyes to Him.

I'll make things right, and I'll try again.

I don't have to be afraid.

Perfect love lives inside of me.

I can.

I can because, He did.

It won't always feel this way, because He made a way!

He made a way for me to walk in His Truth, and my feelings will not get in the way.

I am leader.

Why? Because He leads me.

He's called me.

He chose me.

I'm bringing that scream to the light.

I’m speaking it out.

It has no power over me anymore.

I can and I will, no matter how I feel!

All the dreams and promises He has given me?

Those destiny words?

Yah, those ARE for me.

I was created for greatness.

That’s who He says I am.

I will walk out His Truth.

I'm bringing heaven to earth.

I'm going to make Jesus famous.

Because I've experienced new birth.

I can and I will.

But only because He did.

[chanellefreetobe]

I have to share this ones beautiful heart with all of you. I literally can't help it. Her names Gina (a.k.a Gean Bean) and being her friend changes me on-the-daily. Let me explain (if I even can lol). Here's a picture of her beautiful heart: One day this week I was having a really rough day. I kept it in and was doing a really good job at hiding it. I know I'm not proud of that. But Gina just knows. She has a gift. She sees through the masks and can see right into the heart. This use to scare me lol, but it blesses me so much now, because she doesn't expose you, she makes you feel so seen and so known and then covers it with a love that leaves you knowing the heart of God more then you did before. I was walking in the parking lot, and she was getting ready to leave. We were saying goodbye and she stopped what she was doing because she knew I needed a friend. She sat and listened as she stared into my eyes with this compassion flowing out of her. Hanging on to every word. Then, she began to cry with me. She cried with me!!! In the moment she was hurting with me. She let me spill my heart out and then spoke life into it. She honoured me in the moment with tears still flooding her eyes. I was experiencing the heart of Jesus like I never had before. You see, she could have just listened, gave me a hug, told me she was praying for me and then went on her way. But she cried with me, and hurt with me! Words can't even express.. That was three days ago and I still can't stop thinking about it!! That's just a little picture of my friendship with her! Gina, you inspire me more than you will ever know!! I want to love people like you do! I want to listen like you do! I want to stop for the one like you do! The way you care for people, the way you put 100% into everything you do. Even on a bad day.. It blows me away! I love you so much and I'm so blessed to have you in my life!! You inspire me to be more like Jesus everyday! Thank you for who you are! She is not only amazing, but her writings are amazing as well! Her heart shines through every piece!! You have to check out her blog at www.ginacostanza.com! Trust me you won't regret it! #BragPost 💕

[chanellefreetobe]

"What if the butterfly still thought it was a caterpillar? It would never be able to fly." #GodTime #JournalingSession #HeSpeaksMyLanguage #WhatAreYouBelieving #NewCreation

[chanellefreetobe]

He's Real, and you're worth it. You know that guy you have been hearing about? The one that you read about in blogs? The one God talks to you about? The one you hear stories about? He's real. You don't know who he is yet, but you've seen others like him around. The one that Ioves Jesus with all his heart and isn't afraid to show it. The one that knows he is a son, and walks in it. He not only knows he is son, but he knows your a daughter. He knows your Gods daughter and he honours that. He knows that you are worth being pursued, and he is willing to do what it takes for you to know that. He may still struggle with fear and insecurity, but he's not willing to let that get in the way. He knows you're worth fighting for. That man of valour. The one after Gods own heart. Because he's the one after Gods own heart, he knows how to take care of yours. That guy you have been hearing stories about... He's real. I know you don't him see yet. But he is. And guess what, you're worthy. You're worth a guy like that. To tell you the truth your worth more than that. And he knows it. That's why he's waiting. He's waiting for you. Just like your waiting for him. But he's not only waiting, he's also running hard after God. He's growing into the man God created him to be, just like your growing into the women God created you to be. He believes in mentorship, and is pursuing godly wisdom from men who have gone before him. He believes in community and is planting his roots. That guy you have been hearing stories about... He's real. He knows your worthy, but you have to know it too. Your worth being known and seen. Your worth being pursued. The right way. Do you believe it? You won't have to put yourself out there, because he will see you. You won't have to chase him because he won't be running away. He will make himself known to you. You won't have to prove that your worth it because he will already know. The things that he says to you won't just be words, they will be followed with action. He will be a safe place for you. He won't be afraid of your beauty. He won't be afraid of your success. He won't be afraid of who you are, or your life with Jesus. He will see what sometimes you may struggle to see.. Your value and worth. He won't just want to know you because of your gifts and your talents. He will want to know you for your heart and your dreams. The ones you have never told anyone. Communication will be clear. There won't be any room for uncertainty. He won't just love you on your good days but he will love you on your bad days as well. You will be fully known, and fully accepted. If you allow yourself too.. The one you have been hearing stories about... He's out there. Don't loose hope. Be excited! Learn from those around you and wait. Trust me, he will be worth every minute of it! Just like you are. :) Don't settle, trust God. In the waiting, let the one who created your heart pursue it. He knows your heart more then anyone else. Let God show you your worth. If you can't receive it from Him, how will you ever be able to receive it from anyone else. Put your heart back in the hands of God and let Him hold it. When someone comes along that He knows will treat it right, He'll share. :) The one you've been hearing stories about... He's real and he's out there. And girl, your so worth it. 💕

[chanellefreetobe]

Partnering With Love

A few months ago I went on a retreat with my sister in Michigan. Little did I know that would be the beginning of an incredible journey that God has brought me on. This journey is about letting go of fear, and partnering with Love and, Who is Love? God is Love.

 Let me explain.. On this retreat we got to do a lot of amazing things. Rock Climbing, Zip Lining, Skeet Shooting(where I discovered a hidden talent that can only be practiced in the sates #CanadianGunLaws), but the one that impacted me the most was this activity above ^^ called High Ropes! Don't ask me why, but for some reason we thought it would be fun to climb up high, put on a harness that was attached to a wire, and climb from platform to platform as the courses became more difficult. One course in particular stood out as God began to speak to me, high up in the air about fear in my life. On this one particular course to the next platform, there were these skinny wooden beams that looked like swings. You had to step out on to these wooden beams and walk across it to get to the other beam. There were ropes on each side of the beam that you could grab onto to swing to the next beam. There was only one problem.. The ropes were just out of reach from each other. I had to let go of the rope I was holding onto, in order to grab the other rope. When I let go of this rope to grab the other, I will be relying on only my balance to walk to this other rope! I just want to note that by this point, MY WHOLE BODY IS SHAKING, and my mind is screaming for me to give up and turn around! As I looked at this next rope I had to grab, I paused to take a breath and muster up the courage to let go. 

This is the moment I heard God speak to me. He said “Chanelle this is a beautiful picture of the breakthrough I am bringing in your life. This is what it looks like to let go of fear, and grab onto Love.” I didn't understand it fully in that very moment, but He began to bring me back to this moment as the months went by and, It's all becoming very clear to me.

 A few months later I had an amazing breakthrough from fear. I began to see that God had surrounded me with people to live me back to life in this area. He placed people into my life that saw how much fear was stealing from me, and made the uncomfortable decision to call me higher.

 You see, if your not surrounded with friends and loved one that are willing to make themselves uncomfortable to call you higher in life, then your never going to grow. It's easier for someone to just stay quite and let you live your life the way you want, because we fear they will reject us. But real love is making yourself uncomfortable sometimes, when you see that something is stealing from them, and calling them higher. Jesus came in truth and in grace. Those are the kind of friends I want in my life.

Fear had been stealing from my life for a long time. Fear had become my security, believe it or not. I was comfortable with it. It had become my friend. In order to be the person I want to be, and the leader that I want to be, fear should have no place in my life! I was letting it define who I was, and I was even allowing it to make my decisions for me. But until those that loved me enough confronted me on it, I couldn't see it! It had become such a big part of my life that I was blind to it. God had begun to stir things in my heart, and one day fear roared its ugly head. I'm so glad it did now because I was able to cut it off! But it wasn't pretty!

Along with fear came Victim mentality and Control. I was facing the very things that had stolen from my life for so long! God began to show me that I had become a victim and decided to walk in it. I believed the lie that I was powerless and couldn't overcome, and because of that I controlled everyone around me to believe that lie as well. I had done a pretty good job at convincing most. Through that God began to show me the incredible people in my life who knew that I was a powerful person and tried in many ways to show me that. But because I didn't believe it, I cut them out of my life.

2 Timothy 1:7 started to become so clear to me!!

For God has not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.

Up until this point I always read that scripture and wondered why power and a sound mind were in the same sentence as love. God began to show me why. When you partner with the spirit of fear, you become powerless(victim) and you have allowed fear to make your decisions for you, becoming double minded. Your mind and your thoughts are never at peace because your constantly unable to make decisions, and if you do your always backing out of them. When you partner with the spirit of love, which is the Holy Spirit that lives inside of you, you know that you are a powerful person, who can make powerful decisions because the spirit is leading you. Therefore having a sound mind or what I like to call an “undivided mind.”

As I sat in my room with my journal open, tears began to flow. It was sinking from my head to my heart. It wasn’t just head knowledge but heart knowledge from God Himself. He started bringing me back to all the times in my life where I had allowed fear to make my decisions for me.

He was inviting me to partner with the spirit of Love, and He brought back to the moment He spoke to me on those ropes in Michigan. He said "Chanelle, in order to partner with Love, you need to first let go of fear." Letting go of that rope was so intense for me because it was the thing that was keeping me secure in that moment. But I knew I couldn't grab onto the other rope without letting go first. I had to take the leap of faith. And I believe we all need to take that leap of faith in our walk with God. That day I let go of fear in my life and I clung to Love Himself. I decided that I was going to partner with Love and not allow fear to define me any longer. What a journey it has been as He continues to invite me to partner with Love, and let go of fear! He is bringing me deeper and deeper!

One thing I have realized is that, you can't experience the power and the sound mind that partnering with Love brings, until you let go of fear! You can't hold onto both! The truth is we were never meant to partner with fear. All it does is steals from us. We become our true selves when we partner with Love. The more I partner with Love the more I get to know and walk out who God has created me to be, and it's SO freeing!

I thought fear was my protection and security but it only brought hurt and shame! God is Love, and when you partner with Him, He is your security and protection! When we try and protect ourselves, we hold people at a distance and shut people out. But we were created for community. We were meant to experience His Love for us through other people! If you shut people out, you will shut God out too. Let Him protect you! It's so much better!

My question for you today is, what do you need to let go of? What has God been asking you to let go of? Have you been allowing fear to define who you are? I can tell you today with confidence that YOU are a powerful person! You may not believe it yet but that is the truth of who God created you to be! Partner with Love today, but first let go of fear! Walk in the fullness of who God has created you to be, and surround yourself with those that love you enough to call you higher! It's The Kingdom Culture that we were born to live in!

[chanellefreetobe]

Falling in love with Toronto.

“Chanelle, I want you to fall in love with Toronto, and the young adults of Toronto.”

This was what I heard God say to me as I lay on the floor of the chapel in House of Prayer on Tuesday morning.

This whisper obviously caught my attention and I leaned in a little bit closer. He began to speak to me about falling in love with Toronto. He started showing me some of the things He has planned for my generation. Tears started streaming down my face as I began to feel His heart for the young adults of Toronto and man, was it deep!

There I lay, with this big vision God has given me for the young adults of Toronto… and I begin to get overwhelmed. “God how on earth is this going to happen? How can I, one single person, fall in love with such a big city!? What does that look like? Are you sure you’re speaking to the right person??” All of the classic insecure questions rose up as I sat there and listed off all the reason why this wouldn’t work out, and why God should choose someone else. Lets just say I had a huge #MosesMoment !

You see, one thing I have learned about myself these past couple of months as an intern is.. I am a huge visionary! I guess you can say, I carry the “big picture.” The struggle for me once I get this vision is, “okay… how on earth do I get there?!” I have become very thankful for others in my life that have a gift of putting legs to these big dreams of mine! Lets just say I am really grateful that we all have different gifts, and can use our differences to work together and create a beautiful team! Seriously…shout out to all the mover/shaper/doers out there! THANK YOU!

After I was done my little freak out, God began to speak to me about how 2 people fall in love.

I chuckled a little, realizing He was totally speaking my language!

He said to me “Chanelle, two people can’t fall in love unless they first get to know each other.” They spend time together, laugh together (I would hope so anyways), share where they came from, where they are going, likes, dislikes etc. It’s an exciting, sometimes slightly awkward journey.. but none the less, it’s a journey!

This is the journey I am about to embark on with Toronto. Falling in love.

He has called me to “date” Toronto, and once a week I will be taking a team with me to the university and college campuses. We will be doing just that, getting to know people! Every week I’ll be sharing stories of the beautiful people we encounter, and what God was saying that day.

I would like to take you on this journey with me, as I believe this season isn’t just for me. Its for all those that want to see the young adults of Toronto get to know Jesus and fall in love with Him. It’s for those that believe that God has amazing things for our generation and are willing to do whatever it takes to get us there! It’s for those who carry the heart of The Father, and want to give His heart back to His children. Its for those that want to see our generation walk in the fullness and freedom that God has for us here on this earth! It’s for those that believe in Isaiah 61 and want to walk it out! It’s for those that believe that His Spirit is in us,  because He has appointed us to tell the good news to the poor. To comfort those whose hearts are broken, to tell the captives they are free, to tell the prisoners they are released. To tell them that Jesus will show his kindness! It’s for those that want to comfort all those who are sad, to replace their ashes with crowns, to replace their sorrow with joy, and to clothe them with praise. Its for those who want to show our generation who they really are, and why they were created. Its for those who want to rebuild the old ruins of our generation, and restore the places destroyed long ago!

This journey is for those that will fight on their knees in prayer for this generation. Its for those that believe in His promises, holding on to them tight and calling them down, walking them out! Its for those that want to see The Kingdom of Heaven in Toronto. Its for the burning ones, that want to answer the call to burn for Jesus.

Come on this journey with me. Let’s show this generation who they are, and WHOSE they are! As we fall in love with Toronto I guarantee you we will fall more and more in love with Him as well! As we encounter Him and receive His Love, we can give it away to those around us! Let’s show Toronto what The Kingdom Culture looks like.

[chanellefreetobe]

4 years ago today my life changed dramatically. I was broken, angry, hopeless and had no idea who I was. 4 years ago today I decided to make change. I gave my broken, messed up life to Jesus who set me free. Set me free from a drug and alcohol addiction, set me free from shame and brokenness.. The list goes on! When I think back to the last four years and everything He has done in my life, I can't help but fall to my knees and thank Him for all that He has done in me, my family and my friends. I thought I was giving up my life but really I gained a new life I never thought was possible. Yes I still go through trails, yes I want to give up sometimes. Their are still storms in my life but none of those things define or determine the joy and freedom I have in Him! He surrounds me continuously with beautiful people who love me unconditionally! I'm constantly overwhelmed at how He shows His Love and Faithfulness to me. I'm finally free to walk in who I am and who He created me to be and, there really is no better feeling here on earth! These past 4 years have been an amazing journey and I can't wait to spend the rest of my life being loved by Him! #FourYears #CleanAndSober #ThankYouJesus #Grace #RadicalLove #FreeToBeMe 💕☝🏼️🔥

[chanellefreetobe]

I can't even begin to explain how thankful I am for this weekend!! I got to spend some long over due time with my best friend and her beautiful family! She is such an amazing and selfless friend and an even better mother!! She inspires me to the max! @jigggy_widit and @brock_walz You both have been there for me in the good but also the hard times. I don't know where I would be without you guys!! Thank you so much for who you are! I can't WAAIITTT for your wedding day!! 💕 Some HUGE breakthrough also happened this weekend with family that I have been praying for for a long time! Gods been working on my heart and healing some deep areas. This weekend was the beginning of restoration and reconciliation in my family! ITS SO AMAZING!! Thank you Jesus!! You are soooo faithful and always have been!! Thank you for what your doing in my family and friends lives!! We've had a lot of hard times, but I know He is turning them ALL into good for those that love Him! It's one of His many promises! He's restoring the years that were stolen! There's no one else like you God! 💕👪🙏 (at Thankful )

[chanellefreetobe]

He didn't just die for me but He died for you too. Every drop of His blood was shed for YOU. Every step, every moment of humiliation, every whip, every accusation, all the spit on His face, all the hate, it was all for YOU and me. What's crazy is, He did it with joy! The Bible says YOU and I were the joy set before Him! He was picturing your face as He was walking to His death and it gave Him great joy. He became my sin, He became YOUR sin so that we could become like Him, righteous in the eyes of our Father in Heaven. Crazy eh?! He gave up the adoration of angles and glory in Heaven to come down to earth, and die for YOU and me so we could have a relationship with our Father again. It was all motivated by love. It doesn't even end there though! Today is Easter Sunday! That means He died for us, went to Hell so we wouldn't have to, and rose from the dead so we could have new life!! Haha c'mon!! Thank you Jesus! He paid it all! He took your place so that we could have His place in Heaven! Forever! I don't know where I would be without Him. I'd probably be dead. 4 years ago, I hated myself and I hated life. I was caught up in addiction, hopeless and broken. Now I'm more alive then ever, clean and sober for almost 4 years, and I've been set free from all the anger and pain I use to live with everyday. He's using my mess and turning it into a message for others who need help, And He has given me a huge heart for the broken. C'mon!! Only HE can do that!! Thank you Jesus... YOU are the true definition of love. Happy Easter y'all!! #HeHasRisen #EasterSunday #Jesus #YouCanHaveItToo (at Resurrection Life )

[chanellefreetobe]

Today is my beautiful moms birthday! There is so many things I could say about you mom. Your a women of strength and compassion. I absolutely love the way you expresses yourself in creativity and music. Your gifts are many and you loves to bless people with them. Mom, I love you so much and I thank God everyday that He gave me a mom like you!! Thank you for everything you have poured Into me! I wouldn't be the woman I am today without you! I love your passion and heart to make those around you, and even people you don't know laugh and have a good time! You inspire me more then you know! You have always been my number one fan and believed in me when I couldn't! So proud to call you my mom! I wish I could be with you today!! Thank you for who you are!! Xoxo ❤️🎉🎂 (at Special Birthday Shout Out)