Hello! My name is Halie Sorrow (Pronounced Hay Lee), my pronouns are it / she, I'm 33 years old, I'm a Pansexual leaning lesbian, but very demi with it, and this post is about who I am! While I'm here, if you're a terf, go away <3 If you're a minor you're on thin ice. Just know not everything I post is appropriate for you.
Feel free to flirt with me if you like, but don't expect much! I'm a chronic fumblr and let's be honest, I seize up like a doe in headlights if people are flirty.
I am very much a writer type (My works are below the cut!), and most of my interests and skills relate to that.
That said, feel free to send prompts of any kind into my box, especially for stories of some kind. The weirder and more genderfucky, the better. Asking for some smut is also fine <3
These're my gender graphs. I would love to consolidate them all into one graph, but IDK what program that would be or what that would even begin to look like considering how many variables there are, so, ya know, I did my best. These are not gender graphs that are a "one size fits all", they are mine. If you feel like associating with them feel free, but if you want to know why [Insert gender thing for you] isn't on here, it's because I have no opinion on it, don't know it exists, or don't think it applies to me! I associate with demons a lot (as the graph says) but the type of demon I am is the Acedia Demon, or Noonday Demon. Aka, the demon of depression. Basically, I murdered the host of this body and replaced him. Now I’m making it my own body. I strongly feel like I’m not the original host, but I have access to those memories.
Now for a little bit more about me. CW: my BDSM test, A master list to my different writing projects, some selfies (SFW only), and maybe a few other things.
Be careful, you're looking at my soul.
First one is the new one!
Second one is the old one
that fucking switch awakening, WHEW, goddamn.
"It's funny, a year ago that "Dominant" was at 7%, and switch was sub 20%. Sadist was also at a sub 20%, and voyeur was... sub 40% I think? I've gone through some things, most of which is from one off dates. I want to be clear, though, I'm not a dom! I'm not a top! These things have not changed. My understanding of them has grown a little bit, and my switchiness is debatable. It takes *very* rare moods and people to activate it, and I will tell you now, you being more of a bottom isn't it."
Still mostly true statements, past me. You were so smart. And also a dumbass lmao. STILL NOT A TOP BTW. I've gone from 97% certain to 100%. It ain't happening. :)
Next up, the major projects!
Growing the Hive - Chapter 1 - ChaosMagius - Eclipse Phase [Archive of Our Own]
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
archiveofourown.org
Layla is a transgirl space scavenger mechanic, an anarchist from Mars where Hypercorps run everything, and she's just hit a minor jackpot; an empty cargo ship filled with material that can not only earn her a lot of credits, but also reputation. There's just one problem; there's no pilot, there's no destination, and there's nothing to indicate what really happened.
Set in Eclipse Phase (A Transhumanist Sci-fi TTRPG), Hive's Story is a horror, about the scariest parts of being early in transition; not knowing who you are, or who you'll become, and how people abandon you. It's still a work in progress, naturally.
Necromechtic - Chapter 1 - ChaosMagius - Original Work [Archive of Our Own]
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
archiveofourown.org
A necromancer witch kills a mech pilot and steals their mech, before raising them to Pilot it for her, since she does not know how to do so. The two of them attempt to save the Witch's girlfriend, A Mech Artificer, who is going to be executed by the Empire for the Witch's crimes of necromancy. The POV character is The Pilot, who has lost most of it's memories, and is completely subservient to The Witch, but has enough personality to wish it weren't.
Be sure to read the content warnings; they're going to be pretty important.
Next up, some minor projects! Some have been dropped, some are still being worked on.
Major Project - Hellsworn Charm
Prologue “Do you always do this?” “Do what?” “Pretend you know everything?” “… You think I pretend that I know everything?” “You always hav
Google Docs
Charm used to be human... before she died, anyways. She's wound up in another world, and she feels different, but it's difficult to say how exactly! She doesn't remember NOT being a Hellsworn, even in her old life, but there weren't exactly Hellsworn there. She's lost, confused, and worse, she seems to be hated by anyone who isn't a hellsworn as well, and now she's being forced into the slums outside the city! Slums that are roiling with deceit, and love, and a fomenting rebellion that major players in the slums are trying to prevent. But she's not the only one who's been isekai'd; John's still trying to run the rat race; he figures he can start small, just be a mason, try to live a quiet life. He didn't think he was interested in a loud life... but something is wrong. He was doing that in his last life... and died for it! He's alone, surrounded by people who tolerate and use him, but he doesn't know what to think anymore.
Hellsworn Charm is a story about a girl on an upwards trajectory from the bottom and finding a ceiling of oppression, and about a man who is on a downwards trajectory from... well, not the top. Both struggle with their lack of purpose, but where one gets a support network, the other does not, and the two's trajectories are on a collision path. The story is more world-building than plot, and once i realized I didn't really have one, it sputtered out. I won't be moving it to AO3, though. I'm not too proud of this particular work.
Kiani Teshu
I don't know how many people have ever even heard of this game. It's something my best friend and I used to play around with, back before th
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This post goes into what what it is, as well as explains where it's from ^.^
A Light Touch of Cold Steel (6016 words) by ChaosMagius Chapters: 1/? Fandom: Warhammer 40.000: Darktide (Video Game) Rating: Explicit Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence Relationships: Hadron Omega-7-7/Veteran Characters: Original Female Veteran, Original Female Psyker, Hadron Omega-7-7, Original Nonbinary Fanatic, Original Ogryn Additional Tags: Canon-Typical Violence, Blood and Injury, Gore, Nurgle Plague, WH40K Inquisition BS, Robot/Human Relationships, Trans Female Character, Planet Cadia (Warhammer 40.000), Adeptus Mechanicus (Warhammer 40.000), Masturbation Summary: A team of four varlets attempt a dangerous mission of assassination of a plague cultist officer of nurgle. Things go wrong, and Ashley, our Veteran and POV character, takes a little extra heat for it from Hadron.
A small hit of smut at the end of some violence :)
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
A trans woman takes a train and sneaks into first class so she can eat for the first time in a little while. Unfortunately, the train conductor has different plans for her.
Now for selfies at the end, because if you got this far, you've been real good for me <3 Here's your reward <3
For thousands of years humanity has selectively bred chickens to have larger breasts and to have to lay eggs constantly. We did it to get more meat and per chicken, but from the perspective of the domesticated chickens they’re sorta living in a very specific fetish scenario
I think that broadly much of the appeal of "non-human body parts" in fantasy is about displaying emotions.
Like, a lot of us who had traumatic childhoods had our emotional responses beaten out of us. Don't smile, don't raise your voice, don't cry, boys don't do that, don't bounce your knee, why are you doing that it makes you look weird, don't look away, stop doing that, don't make any noises, and stop moving your hands like that.
Gradually, you become a statue. Immaculate in your formlessness, the world unable to touch you. It's awful.
And, it's not like that goes away when you're out of the situation. Learning to emote again is work. Real work. And it's very hard to justify. On some level, hiding yourself so totally is a strength. It's not 'learning how to put on a mask', it's becoming one with the mask. It's useful, or at least you'll notice when it's useful. To emote again in the ways you lost means fighting through years of trauma.
But. You have to understand. Not emoting feels bad.
Have you ever felt really, really sad but been unable to cry? Denied of tears, you want to gouge your eyes out. The catharsis is gone. Your sadness feels less real for it. Inevitably, you seek other ways to reify your emotions.
It's like this for every emotion that was removed from you. All of them not just an absence but a void. A vacuum that demands more and more. Unstable equilibrium. You have to do something about it but the natural outlet is hidden behind the scariest thing in the world.
So, you fantasize. Wings, horns, tails, ears. You'd coil around her to express your desire. Your wings would flap out and show your pride or bend inward hiding you to show your embarrassment. Your horns would be sensitive the way none of your body could be. Your tail would wag or droop or lift. Here, we see a new language to express ourselves, one untainted by the past. Escapism.
And also it's gap moe when her ears react a ton while the rest of her is totally unresponsive, which is really cute.
so can I just say there's a reason I wasn't going on and on for paragraphs underneath transfem voices project submissions about how "monstrous" and "demonic" submitters' abusers were, or how their experiences were "horror movie material"
first of all, TVP was not about centering my feelings about transfems' abusers or what they went through. going on about how disgusted and enraged I felt underneath submissions would have actively detracted from the voices I was trying to center. TVP was not about my voice
second, abusers are not a subhuman class of people. they are often very ordinary people that exist in our lives. even my worst abuser did not abuse me because he was a subhuman monster or a demon. he abused me because he had systemic power over me, and that power went unchecked by any of the people or systems that could have protected me. he was thoroughly, mundanely human
the world is full of TME people who abuse transfems in ways that range from minor to major. I do not believe this means the world is full of subhuman monsters and demons. I believe that it means there are systems and norms that facilitate and enable this abuse. this isn't "rot," it's systems working as designed
