john mulaney’s new in town sentence meme
‘ every day i think i’m becoming more like my dad. ’
‘ i think i’m becoming more like my mom. ’
‘ ugh, this oughta be good! ’
‘ i have been here all night. you can feel the tv, it’s warm! ’
‘ how do you get lost in new york? the streets are numbered! ’
‘ it’s wrong to make fun of people, you know, but it’s so fun sometimes. ’
‘ it was really easy to get away with murder before they knew about dna. ’
‘ we found a pool of the killers blood in that hallway. ’
‘ now then, back to my hunch. ’
‘ we’ll draw chalk around where the body is. that way, we’ll know where it was. ’
‘ that’s very reassuring. ’
‘ i don’t like robots… thinking of things. ’
‘ aw, we didn’t do anything all day! ’
‘ i, um… i did nothing. i did nothing at all. ’
‘ i don’t wanna go to work! ’
‘ the less amount of time you live, the better… ’
‘ i’m trying to stop smoking. ’
‘ i stole two cigarettes and hid them under my bed with a copy of cosmopolitan magazine. ’
‘ hey, i found your treasure! ’
‘ how do you know how to make a cosmopolitan? ’
‘ should we share some fries? ’
‘ you want me to do what? ’
‘ i don’t know shit about women. ’
‘ you ordered your food an hour ago. it should be here by now. ’
‘ life is a fucking nightmare. ’
‘ i’ll keep all my emotions right here, and then one day i’ll die. ’
‘ you wouldn’t even understand if i told you. ’
‘ i’m really sorry about last night, i was just so drunk. ’
‘ okay, let’s go over there and destroy the place. ’
‘ things got really out of hand. someone broke the pool table. ’
‘ it’s the one thing you can’t replace. ’
‘ sometimes i get nervous on airplanes. ’
‘ no, that’s okay, i was lying. ’
discoholicmusic
origamiaround
jimmyeatworldofficial
stormborns
vaporwave
