ingénue

| Mackenzie | 20 | Getting through life one pun at a time |

[tinylobelia-deactivated20200702]

[wisteriafield]

i’ll kick anyone’s ass. i’ll kick your ass. i’ll kick your dog’s ass. i’ll kick my own ass

[shitpostgenerator]

turns out i am the enemy

[charredlimbs]

being in love and actually being loved in return is such a nice feeling

[thebootydiaries]

[thatsmoderatelyraven]

Resume: really good at maintaining the chip to dip ratio until I run out of chips and dip at the same time

[gulabis-deactivated20170902]

“no homo” I whisper as I look at my garden of pea plants. The progeny had expressed a 1:2:1 ratio of phenotypes. I am Gregor Mendel. 

[thejunglenook]

This joke is lethal

[nubbsgalore]

Happy #ObamaDay

(photos by pete souza, official white house photographer)

[nubbsgalore]

thank you.

[blackness-by-your-side]

[chessys]

when someone calls u their best friend out loud > romantic love

[rupindork-deactivated20130712]

Did Jordin Sparks ever figure out how to breathe with no air

[florals780]

when was the last time u heard anything about jordin sparks. i rest my case

[accras]

Rest in peace Carrie Fisher.

[cyran9]

RIP Debbie Reynolds.

Two amazing women lost in 2016.

[sexti0n]

i want someone who will light a fire in me.

[trillseeker6421]

I want someone who will light me on fire

[thewitchdoctor]

[uranian97]

1) they expensive bruh 2) none of us kno the dif btwn a fucking diamond and some fancy ass glass ur capitalist rock hierarchy has no control over us

[a-chicago-sunflower]

3) mostly mined with slave labor

[everkings]

4) we get excited when our date buys us an appetizer, we don’t even comprehend people buying us rocks that would force us into debt for ten years

[wildhaunt]

5) They aren’t actually that rare and the price is artificially inflated. 

[ariaste]

Pro tip from a former Jared’s salesperson: You want a sparkly white rock that will look like a diamond to the untrained eye and will literally cost the price of a nice dinner for two? Created white sapphire. They’re lab grown and cost *pennies* to make, so you can get a 1 or 2 carat white sapphire for like… $30-80 probably. You can get one as huge as you like, perfectly clear, perfectly flawless. And no one will ever be able to tell the difference except a professional appraiser. Also, sapphires are the second-hardest gemstone (right after diamonds) so they are very durable! Very unlikely that they’ll chip or crack. Get that bitch set in sterling silver and you are GOOD TO GO. Whole thing should cost you less than $200 unless you get a fancy band with a lot of extra stones. Of course, created sapphires come in every color of the rainbow, so if you want something more exciting than plain white, you TOTALLY CAN. 

Created sapphires and silver: The poor Millennial’s engagement ring. 

[everythingcanadian-archive]

THANK YOU EX-JARED’S BASED GOD. 

[dxisybuchanan]

engagement rings: HACKED

[barbiegirls]

[neyruto]

Ok the grinch movie is kind of fucked up cuz the grinch apparently was supposed to go to a different place cuz hes not actually a who and he’s not who passing so everyone makes fun of him and that’s basically the whole plot. and also what happened to his actual parents? what is he? is he inclined to be evil or is that a product of his upbringing? his who parents (two women which i thought was rly interesting because gay whos clearly are still prejudiced against nonwhos) to raise him like a who completely disregarded his identity and tried to whowash him… this is such a complex story that leaves so many loose ends. whered he get the dog.

[asian]

Time to repost my favorite headline

[tinylobelia-deactivated20200702]

[wisteriafield]

i’ll kick anyone’s ass. i’ll kick your ass. i’ll kick your dog’s ass. i’ll kick my own ass