[cheezitpluscaffineaddict]

ADVICE NEEDED

TW: self harm and depression

I love this person with all my heart and I know they love me too. we are on the same page about everything and we have our futures planned too. everything is perfect except, they are suicidal and have severe depression. I am by no means having any intention on leaving them at all but it's taking a toll on me.

Not knowing whether I'll hear from them again or if I'll get to hold them one more time or kiss them one last time, it's killing me. It's making me depressed and I'm not able to pay attention to anything else. I am always worrying about them and always on my phone in case they need me.

It's taking a serious toll on my mental health and life too. I am getting back on my studies and work and I'm barely ever present with whatever is going on around me. I don't get sleep because what if they need me in the middle of the night. I don't know what to do or how to help them. I feel helpless and like my love isn't enough to make them love themselves and life. I feel defeated.

If anyone has any inputs or suggestions as to how I can navigate this it would be great. I love this person with everything i am and there's no way in hell i would let anything happen to them. It's killing me to watch them this way.

[magpie-misfortunes]

the 'having a fun little daydream world as a child' to "i rely so much upon escapism to escape from the monotony of life that days seem to pass too quickly and sometimes i don't feel real" pipeline

[cheezitpluscaffineaddict]

did not need this

[cynthia-viv-deactivated20240204]

“My soul has been so fearful, so violent: forgive its brutality.”

–Louise Glück, Poems 1962-2012

[noctude]

sorry professor i did not do this asisgnemtn becuase i was too sad! NO consequences please. goodbye

[cheezitpluscaffineaddict]

mood atm

[wherehavalltheflowersgone]

So let me get this straight, in Monopoly if you give one player more money to start out it’s “unfair” but if you do it in real life it’s “capitalism”? 

[carriagelamp]

You know what, I’m going to tell you guys a story.

In my Sociology class a few semesters ago, our prof had us break off into groups and, much to our naive joy, began distributing Monopoly boards! We had no idea what was going on but yay! Games! Of course, once our group, and a number of others, got the board we began to work at setting up and distributing the money…

until suddenly our prof told us to put the money down and pick up the dice.

“Roll the dice and sort yourselves from highest to lowest,” our teacher commanded.  "Now, the highest number is the upper class. The next one is upper middle class.  The next two or three are middle class. The last person is in poverty.“

Well, as the person who rolled a two this was startling and not wholly welcome news.

From that point the game changed entirely. We had to hand out the money so that the “upper class” had this fucking mountain, and then less for upper middle, even less for middle, and I didn’t get any triple digit bills. We would all collect different amounts from passing go as well.

The biggest change though? Going to jail. Upper class didn’t. Period. Upper middle class could go but they only had to stay for one turn or they could immediately pay their way out. Middle class had some pretty easy guidelines for when they could pay to get out. As lower class, it was really easy for me to wind up in jail and REALLY hard to get out. But since I was working with so little money when everyone else had so much I was in jail all the time because there was no “game over”.  If I couldn’t pay I had to go to jail for a certain period of time. I had to take out loans with interest I could never pay back just to get out only to wind up back in it again, rolling dice turn after turn hoping to be able to get out.

It was simultaneously the most enlightening and most awful game I had ever played. I was bored and frustrated and a little terrified about it all. And it wasn’t only me. I would never win, I sort of accepted this, but it was amazing how the middle classes reacted as well.  They were stressed. Because they were always that close to either being able to one-up the upper class or from crashing into poverty with me. They had to fight constantly just to stay in the middle.

(I should also mention that the upper class player in one group felt so bad for the lower income players that they ended up overhauling their entire game and creating a “socialist” society instead. I’m not sure how our teacher felt about that one.)

[kierongillen]

Worth stressing this is entirely in the spirit of the original designer’s aims for Monopoly. 

Monopoly’s  original form of The Landlord Game which was explicitly designed to teach people about the unfairness of rent systems. To quote from the wikipedia entry, just as it’s the easiest source to hand…

Magie designed the game to be a “practical demonstration of the present system of land grabbing with all its usual outcomes and consequences”.[2] She based the game on the economic principles of Georgism, a system proposed byHenry George, with the object of demonstrating how rents enrich property owners and impoverish tenants. She knew that some people could find it hard to understand why this happened and what might be done about it, and she thought that if Georgist ideas were put into the concrete form of a game, they might be easier to demonstrate.

When the usual suspects start making “don’t bring politics into games” noises, I roll my eyes pretty hard. They have no idea of the history of the form.

[the-anarcho-raver]

WOW.. THIS IS CRUCIAL! Thank you for that!!! 👏👏

[aphony-cree]

I read a study where they had people play Monopoly and gave one person twice as much money as the others but didn’t announce this. In all the test groups the person with more money won quickly and bragged throughout the game about how well they were doing and that they were better at the game than the others were. None of them noticed that they had more money or considered that starting capitol may have been a factor in their winning

Rich people like to believe we all have equal opportunities and they’re just better at playing the game

[dearmemoirs]

LMAO THE WRITER NEEDS A RAISE RIGHT NOW

[dearmemoirs]

LMAO THE WRITER NEEDS A RAISE RIGHT NOW

[withclawsandsympathy]

we’re gonna find out John Winchester is so shitty because some were-dalmatians shoved his parents off a cliff

[vixen-uchiha]

We already know why he was the way he was

[withclawsandsympathy]

yeah some were-dalmatians shoved his parents off a cliff

[cheezitpluscaffineaddict]

i-

[tonysopranobignaturals-deactiva]

clicking "not interested" on social media posts isn't enough I need an advanced option that's like "I personally wish death upon both the poster and the algorithm that forced me to see this"

[cheezitpluscaffineaddict]

THE SPANISH LOVE DECEPTION

Jesus christ what a book that was! I can't even begin to tell the kind of affect the story AND Aaron Balckford have on me. It was such a quick read and so wholesome. Get me an Aaron please!!!

[cheezitpluscaffineaddict]

THE BOOK I AM READING RIGHT NOW

MARRIAGE FOR ONE by Ella Maise

I am super excited to see how things change. I am more than half way through and all of the time I am literally squealing like a seal. But what I want to say is I see a lot A LOT of similarities between Terms and Conditions, Twisted Lies, and Marriage for One.

I really REALLYY want to see a crossover between Declan-Iris x Jack-Rose x Christian-Stella. The men will bond over how much of a simp they are for their women and the women will bond over how their grumpy men changed into a softie 😭❤️ it would be so interesting considering the events and the way the story unfolds is very very similar in all the three books. Regardless, I know I am going to love it!!

Marriage of convenience - Fake dating - Enemies to Lovers: These three tropes are my favorite is what I am realising! (In descending order) but these are my top 3 favorite tropes ❤️

Has anyone read them?

[cheezitpluscaffineaddict]

BEEN READING TWISTED SERIES, AND OH MY GOD! WHAT ARE THOSE MEN??? WHAT ARE THOSE STORIES??? MIGHT BE MY FAVORITE BOOKS OF 2022!!!

[loveletter2you]

ok yeah 

[cheezitpluscaffineaddict]

are they?

[soracities]

Alain de Botton, Essays in Love [transcript in ALT]

[hwhwgwhnwnwbwbwg-deactivated202]

It’s always “you’re pretty” and never

[hollandslittlekoala-deactivated]

Okay so I think this has to be done once and for all. For those of you reading my blog (and I know you do), I HAVE BLOCKED 20+ BLOGS FROM ALL OF MY SIDE AND MAIN BLOG BECAUSE OF PAST ISSUES. If I'm still accused of copying content, then I hate to tell you that I neither have the time nor the energy to actually look at what people post. My gifs are my own works of creation and I have proof that they've been in my google account for more than a month.

Secondly, the issue that happened, shag? Two years ago...people know about it. My mom does, my sister does, my friends do, so does my boyfriend. And guess what? I still have their support, not because they support sexual harassment but they forgave my mistake because I never have and never will make it again.

Thirdly, go ahead with your legal actions. If you can get lawyers, so can I since I'm an adult now. You accusse me of stalking when you have got friends who do the same? (Otherwise how would they know what I post on my main and rp blog?). Another side note that everything I shit talk about IS NOT CENTRED ON YOU. I have other friends/people I know outside of this hellsite and I rant on my blog about THEM. So stop flattering yourself by thinking I'm harassing or stalking you because I have a life.

Also sidenote: don't you dare come at people who will reblog this (i.e the ones tagged). They know everything, so you don't have to 'educate' them about things.

Tagging people - @sketchbook-things @aaron-ajaxis @oyecaffineadict @the-girl-in-the-chair @incorrectsourwolf

[cheezitpluscaffineaddict]

personally, as far as I know, i think this entire thing is very petty. First of all this 'rp' is a game which is done for fun. If people really felt uncomfortable with it then stopping it there would be a good idea.

Secondly, as far as I can tell any post which was made under #arcayden💚 is an original edit of @hollandslittlekoala and myself because that's the rp both of us are involved in. I have proof of it and so does she. Obviously nobody can make the entire gif by themselves, like i cant get my fc to make a new shot for me personally. We take an already existing shots from Pinterest or any other open source and make the edit by ourselves. And it is all done for fun and games.

That being said, I know @hollandslittlekoala for a while now and i can vouch that she is not someone who wouldn't apologize if a mistake was made on her behalf. I really hope this whole thing settles down.

[cheezitpluscaffineaddict]

SOOOOOOOO I finished reading Terms and Conditions by Lauren Asher. I swear to God I haven't read a better billionaire book before. I personally love grumpy x sunshine + fake dating/marriage tropes. So this book was perfect for me. I do have a little issues with the way the father was dealt but that is alright. I WAS LITERALLY SCREAMING throughout the book because THE TENSION was ultimate. If stares could cut, they both would be chopped into million pieces by now.

My favorite quotes:

“she taught me how anyone can buy a house, but not everyone can buy a home. With a house, you can buy it, sell it, renovate it. But a home is more abstract. It's not a place, but a feeling I can’t describe, so you'll just have to take my work for it.”

“She is taken away for a few scans, and my breaking doesn't return to normal until the nurse brings her back. That should be my first sign that things are getting out of hand on my end. I'm inching closer to an emotional minefield without any kind of map, only one wrong step away from exploding” — Declan Kane page number 236.

“Maybe I am losing it because why else would I care? You hate when she cries. You wouldn't mind murdering someone who hurt her. You took her to the hospital even though you despise them with every fiber of your being. The signs all point to one thing: our situation is quickly crumbling, and I’? The only one to blame.” -- Declan Kane

“If I catch you talking to Iris again, whether about business or not, I'll release this to the public. No questions asked. No second chances. I don't care if you need to use a damn smoke signal to get in contact with me, so long as you leave my wife out of it.”

“But would I have the same company? Probably not. The thought of drinking alone tonight seems unbearable. I've spent an entire lifetime by myself, and while it was never a problem before, it is slowly becoming intolerable.” — Declan Kane page number 254

“A tightness in my chest grows with every step she takes away from me. I hate the feeling sprouting inside of me like a weed, tangling around my heart like a vine, almost as much as I hate Iris walking away from me.” — Declan Kane page number 257. “Our marriage might be fake, but these feelings burning inside me are anything but. It's only a matter of time before I make her mine. She just doesn't know it yet.”

“Pursuing Iris was never an option before, but there is no way I can continue on the same trajectory. I will drive myself mad fighting the urges threatening to consume me whenever she enters the room. Lately, I seem to be driven by the burning sensation in my gut.” — Declan Kane page number 260-261.

“Declan’s laugh is a weapon of mass seduction, and I’m it's biggest target. It’s rough and unpracticed, and it makes a tingle shoot down my spine.” — Iris Kane page number 269.

So a part of his inheritance rule is that Declan should have a family, including a baby. Page number 385: “what if I’m not ready? What if this is all too much all at once and I can't handle a new relationship and a new baby?”

His throat Bob. “Then we wait.”

“Even if it means holding off on you becoming CEO?”

“Even then.”

Now remember, this is the man who literally went ahead with a fake marriage to get the inheritance and become CEO. He is speaking like this. Wow. Talk about head over heels love.

So, they talk in this forein words. Like when they can't explain how they are feeling they say these words. These are a few of my favorites:

Yuafen: A predestined infinity

Kilig: a feeling of exhilaration or elation caused by an exciting or romantic experience

Merak: to do something with pleasure

Mamihlapinatapai: a look shared between two people, each wishing that the other would initiate something that they both desire but which neither wants to begin.

THIS BOOK HAS FINISHED ME. I LOVE IT SO MUCH! I did not read the first book: Fine Print. But if this is how it is going to be, hell I am buying it right now. Rowan and Zahara's story is more like a fairytale I heard but Terms and Conditions is a matured relationship is what I felt.