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@cherri-cola-soda
Intro Post
I’m Cherri Cola. I like soda and cherry coke. My pronouns are he/they and I’ll still ghost you over it. All my poems are tagged here as Cherri Cola’s Poetry Corner , you should check them out please. My other tag is Cherris chat corner for me just talking
Also @k0bra-k1d is my favorite record. 🩷
File no. 33406
[Open file]
Disabled people are only “believable” once someone without our struggles decides our pain is real enough to echo. We’re only visible when someone more palatable repeats our words. Until then? We're treated as inconvenient, dramatic, or just not trying hard enough.
You don’t get to call a space inclusive when it only starts listening once an abled voice speaks. That’s not allyship. That’s erasure.
Band spaces aren’t truly safe for disabled people - not until someone without those struggles barges in, speaks over them, and decides how accessibility should be handled.
Because it’s never about listening. It’s about control.
Also (because apaprently it needs said)
Speaking up for someone isn’t the same thing as speaking over them.
There’s a huge difference between silencing someone and supporting them when they can’t speak up for themselves - especially when disability, communication barriers, or safety concerns are involved.
Acting like any kind of advocacy is “talking over” people ignores the reality that not everyone can always advocate for themselves. And honestly? that take is ableist.
Refusing to help someone because you’re scared of being “too loud” or “overstepping” just ends up abandoning the people who actually need allies the most.
Listen and speak up. Both can coexist.
Also reblogs exist
You don't even need to tag it, just like the post and reblog it's that simple
Don't cite me to my friends as a reason to not speak up?? Craziest thing that's happened today and I'm in uni
i feel like the relationships between the killjoys is sometimes portrayed as, like, too healthy. make these bitches fight and miscommunicate please
.
Disabled killjoy headcanons need to go on the shelf until the fandom actually listens to and helps disabled people
.
Compassion has always been as potent as cruelty. As much as we’ve seen so much violence in history, it could never truly kill kindness & empathy; It only dulls it - until someone is brave enough to use it to rip through the hatred, everyone else will remember to sharpen that instinct.
Stay hopeful folks, fascist regimes & empires have existed before but they’ve also fallen. There’s going to be some scraps of that hatred so remember to sharpen your kindness & maintain it.
Disabled killjoy headcanons need to go on the shelf until the fandom actually listens to and helps disabled people
.
Hey Cherri, Vodka made Pepper a plush. Do you want it?
Mmh? ., ?
(He looks a little less like a complete wreck, but still mostly asleep)
I… he made two. A little rat, and one that looks like you…
(The Cherri plush is cute, crocheted with a pink tee and grey trousers. The rat is brown, and smaller than Pepper. Xey hold them out for approval)
(His hand shakes as they take them, and he smiles)
‘S shiny
I thought so too. I think he did a good job.
(Xey’re a little quieter than usual, still feeling a little off since the poisoning. Xeir static is anxious, and a little sad)
‘S really good at it..
(He sits up a little straighter, careful not to wake either Kobra or Pepper. They turn back to stare at Lexi)
‘Re you ok?
He is.
(Xey seem to deliberate on responding)
Less okay than I’d like to be… you haven’t seen Vodka, have you?
Mm m
(They shake their head, frowning)
Okay… he was here earlier, but I know he wanted to stretch his legs…
(Xey shake their head like they want to shake the thoughts out, careful not to move the arm xey had the drip in too much- the plaster still there)
Are you a little more shiny than before?
Mmm……..,
(They look away, down at the plushies and his cat and boyfriend)
some..
That’s good.
(Xey shrug, picking at a loose thread on their jeans. They feel very guilty still about Kobra hitting his head again)
Is he okay?
…….. I hope so. …
Me too.
(Xey try not to sound so guilty about it)
How do you deal with scary stuff after it’s happened? How do you… get over it? Not the right words, but I don’t know how to phrase it…
(Cherri still doesn’t look at xem)
I… ‘m the wrong person to ask.
(He hesitates, then speaks even more softly)
usually I just try to kill myself again, or get high when that doesn’t work.
Mm.
(Xey nod)
I’m good at getting high… I don’t know if it helps all that much though.
Yeah… I- I try to be alright.
‘S all.. we can do… sometimes.
Yeah.. and sometimes it is almost enough
Very true. Sometimes almost enough is the best it gets…
Yeah…..
(They sigh, curling up a bit)
It’s not great, but it’s what we have.
(Xey pull out Whyote, the coyote plush Vodka made that xey claimed, and play with it)
When we go back to the shack, I want to give Girlie a rock. A fun rock, but I don’t know what colour. What colour do you think I should find?
She likes orange, I think she likes sedimentary ones..? I should- should find one for her
(He makes an obvious effort to speak a little louder)
We could look together, if you like.
(Xey stand closer so xey can hear better)
I think the orange ones look nice.
Yeah.. … I don’t wanna go outside
(His voice falls back again, hushed)
That’s okay. I can bring rocks later, when I can go outside, I can bring them for your approval.
(Xey sound a little sad at the idea that xey’re not well enough to leave)
(Cherri actually looks up at that, though not enough to look Lexi in the face)
That sounds nice
(He’s still soft spoken, but now sounds cautiously optimistic about the idea)
Yea. It’ll be nice to be allowed to leave- and I’ll enjoy finding some fun rocks too. Maybe I’ll find a pink one.
Maybe
(He yawns, then frowns at himself. He doesn’t need more sleep)
There have to be some round here somewhere…
(Xey’re trying very hard not to think about the things bothering them)
Maybe I can find a blue one too. Or maybe I might find something else cool- I found a ship in a bottle under a cactus once.
Really? How’d it get in th’ bottle?
(He sounds genuinely curious, perking up. They glance over at the air around Lexi a few times, more worried)
(The static is still anxious, more anxious than sad now. Xey won’t admit it, but being poisoned scared them and is still scaring them)
I’m not sure, I think maybe the bottle was cut in half, then they put the ship inside and fixed the bottle again? The ship seemed quite cool…
Woah..
(Cherri focuses more fully on the air around Lexi, looking like he’s staring straight through xem at something real)
It had little sails and everything…
(Xey’re trying very hard to recall all the details, squeezing Whyote tighter unconsciously. It’s frustrating them that they can’t quite remember everything about it)
I think it had… an anchor on the side. I think it was black?
That does sound shiny. Maybe Show could find one like it.
You think ae would like one?
(Xey scrunch in concentration as they try to remember where they left the ship in a bottle, static reflecting more annoyance than xeir face does when they can’t remember)
I wish I knew what I did with it…
Ae finds ‘ll sorts ‘f stuff.. ‘s okay
So Pony will definitely find one eventually… maybe even the one I found.
(Xey hate not remembering properly anymore, but xey know there’s nothing they can do to fix it)
I like finding odd things. I like bottle caps- like the ones on my jacket. Found a lot of those in the desert.
D’y ever keep the bottles.?
Used to a lot more than now… Whiskey tossed my collection. I have a few in the back of our car still- pop bottles that probably aren’t made anymore.
Woah.. ‘s mean. I, uh- I have a few bottles, too
She was mean.
(There’s a not so tiny amount of anger that briefly mixes in with the anxiety before disappearing again)
Do they have different colours? I found a green one and a pink one…
I have a purple n some green ones! I don’t think I’ve got the caps anymore, though
Ooo purple… I think I had an orange one once. I think someone nicked it?
(Xey seem to be questioning the memory)
.. it was a nice shade of orange. The cap was green though.
‘ll show you m whole collection sometime
(He sounds genuinely excited and happy)
Will you? I’d love that!
(Xey smile, some actual joy cutting through the anxiety in the static)
(Cherri perks up, happy to see someone else excited too. He rocks back and forth, almost all the golden orange replaced with other colors)
(Seeing him perk up makes xem feel less anxious and more happy, smiling a little)
I’ll have to show you some of the other bottle caps I have too…
(He nods excitedly, humming louder than he usually talks)
(They smile more, putting Whyote down to fish out a beer bottle lid that’s multicoloured from their pocket)
I’ve had this one for ages, what do you think?
(Cherri watches it intently, head tilted)
Ooooo…….
Shiny right?
(Xey grin, showing it off proudly. They then get one out that seems to have been sun bleached slightly, part of it a different colour to the rest of the cap)
What about this one?
I like ‘m!
(Xey beam, very happy with that response)
Me too!
I don’ have any with me
(He sounds forlorn, although there’s three cherry coke cans and a handful of tabs on the side table)
(Xey nod and make a humming noise, and then fish through their pockets until they find a pastel pink bottle cap, and hold it out to him to take)
(They hold his hand out, hesitant)
For me?
Yea!
(Xey put it in his hand slowly, still grinning)
(He inspects it more closely, then looks at Lexi)
Thank you!
(Xey smile at him, happy he seems to like it)
You’re welcome! I’m glad you like it.
(He sways for a bit, then stops and bites at his lip. He should say something else..?)
(Xey fidget with Whyote a little, having forgotten what xey wanted to say)
… Vodka really likes rats. Not actual rats, just talking about them.
Really? I dunno a lot abou’ rats
He says their teeth are yellow because there’s high levels of iron in them. He also says they have to keep gnawing on things otherwise their teeth keep growing on and on.
(The rat stuff does interest them, although they really just like to see Vodka happy and talking no matter the subject)
‘Ve never seen one up close.,
Me either, and I’m not sure if he has… I think he found a book about them. Before he came here he was reading a lot of Hollow’s books, but I couldn’t figure out what they were about.
(Before the bike accident, xey could read everything just fine- now it’s more difficult, and requires more concentration)
I like reading.. ‘s- ‘s nice
(Cherri yawns, slumping over in the bed. His eyes are still open, but definitely drooping)
Hey Cherri, Vodka made Pepper a plush. Do you want it?
Mmh? ., ?
(He looks a little less like a complete wreck, but still mostly asleep)
I… he made two. A little rat, and one that looks like you…
(The Cherri plush is cute, crocheted with a pink tee and grey trousers. The rat is brown, and smaller than Pepper. Xey hold them out for approval)
(His hand shakes as they take them, and he smiles)
‘S shiny
I thought so too. I think he did a good job.
(Xey’re a little quieter than usual, still feeling a little off since the poisoning. Xeir static is anxious, and a little sad)
‘S really good at it..
(He sits up a little straighter, careful not to wake either Kobra or Pepper. They turn back to stare at Lexi)
‘Re you ok?
He is.
(Xey seem to deliberate on responding)
Less okay than I’d like to be… you haven’t seen Vodka, have you?
Mm m
(They shake their head, frowning)
Okay… he was here earlier, but I know he wanted to stretch his legs…
(Xey shake their head like they want to shake the thoughts out, careful not to move the arm xey had the drip in too much- the plaster still there)
Are you a little more shiny than before?
Mmm……..,
(They look away, down at the plushies and his cat and boyfriend)
some..
That’s good.
(Xey shrug, picking at a loose thread on their jeans. They feel very guilty still about Kobra hitting his head again)
Is he okay?
…….. I hope so. …
Me too.
(Xey try not to sound so guilty about it)
How do you deal with scary stuff after it’s happened? How do you… get over it? Not the right words, but I don’t know how to phrase it…
(Cherri still doesn’t look at xem)
I… ‘m the wrong person to ask.
(He hesitates, then speaks even more softly)
usually I just try to kill myself again, or get high when that doesn’t work.
Mm.
(Xey nod)
I’m good at getting high… I don’t know if it helps all that much though.
Yeah… I- I try to be alright.
‘S all.. we can do… sometimes.
Yeah.. and sometimes it is almost enough
Very true. Sometimes almost enough is the best it gets…
Yeah…..
(They sigh, curling up a bit)
It’s not great, but it’s what we have.
(Xey pull out Whyote, the coyote plush Vodka made that xey claimed, and play with it)
When we go back to the shack, I want to give Girlie a rock. A fun rock, but I don’t know what colour. What colour do you think I should find?
She likes orange, I think she likes sedimentary ones..? I should- should find one for her
(He makes an obvious effort to speak a little louder)
We could look together, if you like.
(Xey stand closer so xey can hear better)
I think the orange ones look nice.
Yeah.. … I don’t wanna go outside
(His voice falls back again, hushed)
That’s okay. I can bring rocks later, when I can go outside, I can bring them for your approval.
(Xey sound a little sad at the idea that xey’re not well enough to leave)
(Cherri actually looks up at that, though not enough to look Lexi in the face)
That sounds nice
(He’s still soft spoken, but now sounds cautiously optimistic about the idea)
Yea. It’ll be nice to be allowed to leave- and I’ll enjoy finding some fun rocks too. Maybe I’ll find a pink one.
Maybe
(He yawns, then frowns at himself. He doesn’t need more sleep)
There have to be some round here somewhere…
(Xey’re trying very hard not to think about the things bothering them)
Maybe I can find a blue one too. Or maybe I might find something else cool- I found a ship in a bottle under a cactus once.
Really? How’d it get in th’ bottle?
(He sounds genuinely curious, perking up. They glance over at the air around Lexi a few times, more worried)
(The static is still anxious, more anxious than sad now. Xey won’t admit it, but being poisoned scared them and is still scaring them)
I’m not sure, I think maybe the bottle was cut in half, then they put the ship inside and fixed the bottle again? The ship seemed quite cool…
Woah..
(Cherri focuses more fully on the air around Lexi, looking like he’s staring straight through xem at something real)
It had little sails and everything…
(Xey’re trying very hard to recall all the details, squeezing Whyote tighter unconsciously. It’s frustrating them that they can’t quite remember everything about it)
I think it had… an anchor on the side. I think it was black?
That does sound shiny. Maybe Show could find one like it.
You think ae would like one?
(Xey scrunch in concentration as they try to remember where they left the ship in a bottle, static reflecting more annoyance than xeir face does when they can’t remember)
I wish I knew what I did with it…
Ae finds ‘ll sorts ‘f stuff.. ‘s okay
So Pony will definitely find one eventually… maybe even the one I found.
(Xey hate not remembering properly anymore, but xey know there’s nothing they can do to fix it)
I like finding odd things. I like bottle caps- like the ones on my jacket. Found a lot of those in the desert.
D’y ever keep the bottles.?
Used to a lot more than now… Whiskey tossed my collection. I have a few in the back of our car still- pop bottles that probably aren’t made anymore.
Woah.. ‘s mean. I, uh- I have a few bottles, too
She was mean.
(There’s a not so tiny amount of anger that briefly mixes in with the anxiety before disappearing again)
Do they have different colours? I found a green one and a pink one…
I have a purple n some green ones! I don’t think I’ve got the caps anymore, though
Ooo purple… I think I had an orange one once. I think someone nicked it?
(Xey seem to be questioning the memory)
.. it was a nice shade of orange. The cap was green though.
‘ll show you m whole collection sometime
(He sounds genuinely excited and happy)
Will you? I’d love that!
(Xey smile, some actual joy cutting through the anxiety in the static)
(Cherri perks up, happy to see someone else excited too. He rocks back and forth, almost all the golden orange replaced with other colors)
(Seeing him perk up makes xem feel less anxious and more happy, smiling a little)
I’ll have to show you some of the other bottle caps I have too…
(He nods excitedly, humming louder than he usually talks)
(They smile more, putting Whyote down to fish out a beer bottle lid that’s multicoloured from their pocket)
I’ve had this one for ages, what do you think?
(Cherri watches it intently, head tilted)
Ooooo…….
Shiny right?
(Xey grin, showing it off proudly. They then get one out that seems to have been sun bleached slightly, part of it a different colour to the rest of the cap)
What about this one?
I like ‘m!
(Xey beam, very happy with that response)
Me too!
I don’ have any with me
(He sounds forlorn, although there’s three cherry coke cans and a handful of tabs on the side table)
(Xey nod and make a humming noise, and then fish through their pockets until they find a pastel pink bottle cap, and hold it out to him to take)
(They hold his hand out, hesitant)
For me?
Yea!
(Xey put it in his hand slowly, still grinning)
(He inspects it more closely, then looks at Lexi)
Thank you!
(Xey smile at him, happy he seems to like it)
You’re welcome! I’m glad you like it.
(He sways for a bit, then stops and bites at his lip. He should say something else..?)
(Xey fidget with Whyote a little, having forgotten what xey wanted to say)
… Vodka really likes rats. Not actual rats, just talking about them.
Really? I dunno a lot abou’ rats
He says their teeth are yellow because there’s high levels of iron in them. He also says they have to keep gnawing on things otherwise their teeth keep growing on and on.
(The rat stuff does interest them, although they really just like to see Vodka happy and talking no matter the subject)
‘Ve never seen one up close.,
Hey Cherri, Vodka made Pepper a plush. Do you want it?
Mmh? ., ?
(He looks a little less like a complete wreck, but still mostly asleep)
I… he made two. A little rat, and one that looks like you…
(The Cherri plush is cute, crocheted with a pink tee and grey trousers. The rat is brown, and smaller than Pepper. Xey hold them out for approval)
(His hand shakes as they take them, and he smiles)
‘S shiny
I thought so too. I think he did a good job.
(Xey’re a little quieter than usual, still feeling a little off since the poisoning. Xeir static is anxious, and a little sad)
‘S really good at it..
(He sits up a little straighter, careful not to wake either Kobra or Pepper. They turn back to stare at Lexi)
‘Re you ok?
He is.
(Xey seem to deliberate on responding)
Less okay than I’d like to be… you haven’t seen Vodka, have you?
Mm m
(They shake their head, frowning)
Okay… he was here earlier, but I know he wanted to stretch his legs…
(Xey shake their head like they want to shake the thoughts out, careful not to move the arm xey had the drip in too much- the plaster still there)
Are you a little more shiny than before?
Mmm……..,
(They look away, down at the plushies and his cat and boyfriend)
some..
That’s good.
(Xey shrug, picking at a loose thread on their jeans. They feel very guilty still about Kobra hitting his head again)
Is he okay?
…….. I hope so. …
Me too.
(Xey try not to sound so guilty about it)
How do you deal with scary stuff after it’s happened? How do you… get over it? Not the right words, but I don’t know how to phrase it…
(Cherri still doesn’t look at xem)
I… ‘m the wrong person to ask.
(He hesitates, then speaks even more softly)
usually I just try to kill myself again, or get high when that doesn’t work.
Mm.
(Xey nod)
I’m good at getting high… I don’t know if it helps all that much though.
Yeah… I- I try to be alright.
‘S all.. we can do… sometimes.
Yeah.. and sometimes it is almost enough
Very true. Sometimes almost enough is the best it gets…
Yeah…..
(They sigh, curling up a bit)
It’s not great, but it’s what we have.
(Xey pull out Whyote, the coyote plush Vodka made that xey claimed, and play with it)
When we go back to the shack, I want to give Girlie a rock. A fun rock, but I don’t know what colour. What colour do you think I should find?
She likes orange, I think she likes sedimentary ones..? I should- should find one for her
(He makes an obvious effort to speak a little louder)
We could look together, if you like.
(Xey stand closer so xey can hear better)
I think the orange ones look nice.
Yeah.. … I don’t wanna go outside
(His voice falls back again, hushed)
That’s okay. I can bring rocks later, when I can go outside, I can bring them for your approval.
(Xey sound a little sad at the idea that xey’re not well enough to leave)
(Cherri actually looks up at that, though not enough to look Lexi in the face)
That sounds nice
(He’s still soft spoken, but now sounds cautiously optimistic about the idea)
Yea. It’ll be nice to be allowed to leave- and I’ll enjoy finding some fun rocks too. Maybe I’ll find a pink one.
Maybe
(He yawns, then frowns at himself. He doesn’t need more sleep)
There have to be some round here somewhere…
(Xey’re trying very hard not to think about the things bothering them)
Maybe I can find a blue one too. Or maybe I might find something else cool- I found a ship in a bottle under a cactus once.
Really? How’d it get in th’ bottle?
(He sounds genuinely curious, perking up. They glance over at the air around Lexi a few times, more worried)
(The static is still anxious, more anxious than sad now. Xey won’t admit it, but being poisoned scared them and is still scaring them)
I’m not sure, I think maybe the bottle was cut in half, then they put the ship inside and fixed the bottle again? The ship seemed quite cool…
Woah..
(Cherri focuses more fully on the air around Lexi, looking like he’s staring straight through xem at something real)
It had little sails and everything…
(Xey’re trying very hard to recall all the details, squeezing Whyote tighter unconsciously. It’s frustrating them that they can’t quite remember everything about it)
I think it had… an anchor on the side. I think it was black?
That does sound shiny. Maybe Show could find one like it.
You think ae would like one?
(Xey scrunch in concentration as they try to remember where they left the ship in a bottle, static reflecting more annoyance than xeir face does when they can’t remember)
I wish I knew what I did with it…
Ae finds ‘ll sorts ‘f stuff.. ‘s okay
So Pony will definitely find one eventually… maybe even the one I found.
(Xey hate not remembering properly anymore, but xey know there’s nothing they can do to fix it)
I like finding odd things. I like bottle caps- like the ones on my jacket. Found a lot of those in the desert.
D’y ever keep the bottles.?
Used to a lot more than now… Whiskey tossed my collection. I have a few in the back of our car still- pop bottles that probably aren’t made anymore.
Woah.. ‘s mean. I, uh- I have a few bottles, too
She was mean.
(There’s a not so tiny amount of anger that briefly mixes in with the anxiety before disappearing again)
Do they have different colours? I found a green one and a pink one…
I have a purple n some green ones! I don’t think I’ve got the caps anymore, though
Ooo purple… I think I had an orange one once. I think someone nicked it?
(Xey seem to be questioning the memory)
.. it was a nice shade of orange. The cap was green though.
‘ll show you m whole collection sometime
(He sounds genuinely excited and happy)
Will you? I’d love that!
(Xey smile, some actual joy cutting through the anxiety in the static)
(Cherri perks up, happy to see someone else excited too. He rocks back and forth, almost all the golden orange replaced with other colors)
(Seeing him perk up makes xem feel less anxious and more happy, smiling a little)
I’ll have to show you some of the other bottle caps I have too…
(He nods excitedly, humming louder than he usually talks)
(They smile more, putting Whyote down to fish out a beer bottle lid that’s multicoloured from their pocket)
I’ve had this one for ages, what do you think?
(Cherri watches it intently, head tilted)
Ooooo…….
Shiny right?
(Xey grin, showing it off proudly. They then get one out that seems to have been sun bleached slightly, part of it a different colour to the rest of the cap)
What about this one?
I like ‘m!
(Xey beam, very happy with that response)
Me too!
I don’ have any with me
(He sounds forlorn, although there’s three cherry coke cans and a handful of tabs on the side table)
(Xey nod and make a humming noise, and then fish through their pockets until they find a pastel pink bottle cap, and hold it out to him to take)
(They hold his hand out, hesitant)
For me?
Yea!
(Xey put it in his hand slowly, still grinning)
(He inspects it more closely, then looks at Lexi)
Thank you!
(Xey smile at him, happy he seems to like it)
You’re welcome! I’m glad you like it.
(He sways for a bit, then stops and bites at his lip. He should say something else..?)
(Xey fidget with Whyote a little, having forgotten what xey wanted to say)
… Vodka really likes rats. Not actual rats, just talking about them.
Really? I dunno a lot abou’ rats
Hey Cherri, Vodka made Pepper a plush. Do you want it?
Mmh? ., ?
(He looks a little less like a complete wreck, but still mostly asleep)
I… he made two. A little rat, and one that looks like you…
(The Cherri plush is cute, crocheted with a pink tee and grey trousers. The rat is brown, and smaller than Pepper. Xey hold them out for approval)
(His hand shakes as they take them, and he smiles)
‘S shiny
I thought so too. I think he did a good job.
(Xey’re a little quieter than usual, still feeling a little off since the poisoning. Xeir static is anxious, and a little sad)
‘S really good at it..
(He sits up a little straighter, careful not to wake either Kobra or Pepper. They turn back to stare at Lexi)
‘Re you ok?
He is.
(Xey seem to deliberate on responding)
Less okay than I’d like to be… you haven’t seen Vodka, have you?
Mm m
(They shake their head, frowning)
Okay… he was here earlier, but I know he wanted to stretch his legs…
(Xey shake their head like they want to shake the thoughts out, careful not to move the arm xey had the drip in too much- the plaster still there)
Are you a little more shiny than before?
Mmm……..,
(They look away, down at the plushies and his cat and boyfriend)
some..
That’s good.
(Xey shrug, picking at a loose thread on their jeans. They feel very guilty still about Kobra hitting his head again)
Is he okay?
…….. I hope so. …
Me too.
(Xey try not to sound so guilty about it)
How do you deal with scary stuff after it’s happened? How do you… get over it? Not the right words, but I don’t know how to phrase it…
(Cherri still doesn’t look at xem)
I… ‘m the wrong person to ask.
(He hesitates, then speaks even more softly)
usually I just try to kill myself again, or get high when that doesn’t work.
Mm.
(Xey nod)
I’m good at getting high… I don’t know if it helps all that much though.
Yeah… I- I try to be alright.
‘S all.. we can do… sometimes.
Yeah.. and sometimes it is almost enough
Very true. Sometimes almost enough is the best it gets…
Yeah…..
(They sigh, curling up a bit)
It’s not great, but it’s what we have.
(Xey pull out Whyote, the coyote plush Vodka made that xey claimed, and play with it)
When we go back to the shack, I want to give Girlie a rock. A fun rock, but I don’t know what colour. What colour do you think I should find?
She likes orange, I think she likes sedimentary ones..? I should- should find one for her
(He makes an obvious effort to speak a little louder)
We could look together, if you like.
(Xey stand closer so xey can hear better)
I think the orange ones look nice.
Yeah.. … I don’t wanna go outside
(His voice falls back again, hushed)
That’s okay. I can bring rocks later, when I can go outside, I can bring them for your approval.
(Xey sound a little sad at the idea that xey’re not well enough to leave)
(Cherri actually looks up at that, though not enough to look Lexi in the face)
That sounds nice
(He’s still soft spoken, but now sounds cautiously optimistic about the idea)
Yea. It’ll be nice to be allowed to leave- and I’ll enjoy finding some fun rocks too. Maybe I’ll find a pink one.
Maybe
(He yawns, then frowns at himself. He doesn’t need more sleep)
There have to be some round here somewhere…
(Xey’re trying very hard not to think about the things bothering them)
Maybe I can find a blue one too. Or maybe I might find something else cool- I found a ship in a bottle under a cactus once.
Really? How’d it get in th’ bottle?
(He sounds genuinely curious, perking up. They glance over at the air around Lexi a few times, more worried)
(The static is still anxious, more anxious than sad now. Xey won’t admit it, but being poisoned scared them and is still scaring them)
I’m not sure, I think maybe the bottle was cut in half, then they put the ship inside and fixed the bottle again? The ship seemed quite cool…
Woah..
(Cherri focuses more fully on the air around Lexi, looking like he’s staring straight through xem at something real)
It had little sails and everything…
(Xey’re trying very hard to recall all the details, squeezing Whyote tighter unconsciously. It’s frustrating them that they can’t quite remember everything about it)
I think it had… an anchor on the side. I think it was black?
That does sound shiny. Maybe Show could find one like it.
You think ae would like one?
(Xey scrunch in concentration as they try to remember where they left the ship in a bottle, static reflecting more annoyance than xeir face does when they can’t remember)
I wish I knew what I did with it…
Ae finds ‘ll sorts ‘f stuff.. ‘s okay
So Pony will definitely find one eventually… maybe even the one I found.
(Xey hate not remembering properly anymore, but xey know there’s nothing they can do to fix it)
I like finding odd things. I like bottle caps- like the ones on my jacket. Found a lot of those in the desert.
D’y ever keep the bottles.?
Used to a lot more than now… Whiskey tossed my collection. I have a few in the back of our car still- pop bottles that probably aren’t made anymore.
Woah.. ‘s mean. I, uh- I have a few bottles, too
She was mean.
(There’s a not so tiny amount of anger that briefly mixes in with the anxiety before disappearing again)
Do they have different colours? I found a green one and a pink one…
I have a purple n some green ones! I don’t think I’ve got the caps anymore, though
Ooo purple… I think I had an orange one once. I think someone nicked it?
(Xey seem to be questioning the memory)
.. it was a nice shade of orange. The cap was green though.
‘ll show you m whole collection sometime
(He sounds genuinely excited and happy)
Will you? I’d love that!
(Xey smile, some actual joy cutting through the anxiety in the static)
(Cherri perks up, happy to see someone else excited too. He rocks back and forth, almost all the golden orange replaced with other colors)
(Seeing him perk up makes xem feel less anxious and more happy, smiling a little)
I’ll have to show you some of the other bottle caps I have too…
(He nods excitedly, humming louder than he usually talks)
(They smile more, putting Whyote down to fish out a beer bottle lid that’s multicoloured from their pocket)
I’ve had this one for ages, what do you think?
(Cherri watches it intently, head tilted)
Ooooo…….
Shiny right?
(Xey grin, showing it off proudly. They then get one out that seems to have been sun bleached slightly, part of it a different colour to the rest of the cap)
What about this one?
I like ‘m!
(Xey beam, very happy with that response)
Me too!
I don’ have any with me
(He sounds forlorn, although there’s three cherry coke cans and a handful of tabs on the side table)
(Xey nod and make a humming noise, and then fish through their pockets until they find a pastel pink bottle cap, and hold it out to him to take)
(They hold his hand out, hesitant)
For me?
Yea!
(Xey put it in his hand slowly, still grinning)
(He inspects it more closely, then looks at Lexi)
Thank you!
(Xey smile at him, happy he seems to like it)
You’re welcome! I’m glad you like it.
(He sways for a bit, then stops and bites at his lip. He should say something else..?)
Hey Cherri, Vodka made Pepper a plush. Do you want it?
Mmh? ., ?
(He looks a little less like a complete wreck, but still mostly asleep)
I… he made two. A little rat, and one that looks like you…
(The Cherri plush is cute, crocheted with a pink tee and grey trousers. The rat is brown, and smaller than Pepper. Xey hold them out for approval)
(His hand shakes as they take them, and he smiles)
‘S shiny
I thought so too. I think he did a good job.
(Xey’re a little quieter than usual, still feeling a little off since the poisoning. Xeir static is anxious, and a little sad)
‘S really good at it..
(He sits up a little straighter, careful not to wake either Kobra or Pepper. They turn back to stare at Lexi)
‘Re you ok?
He is.
(Xey seem to deliberate on responding)
Less okay than I’d like to be… you haven’t seen Vodka, have you?
Mm m
(They shake their head, frowning)
Okay… he was here earlier, but I know he wanted to stretch his legs…
(Xey shake their head like they want to shake the thoughts out, careful not to move the arm xey had the drip in too much- the plaster still there)
Are you a little more shiny than before?
Mmm……..,
(They look away, down at the plushies and his cat and boyfriend)
some..
That’s good.
(Xey shrug, picking at a loose thread on their jeans. They feel very guilty still about Kobra hitting his head again)
Is he okay?
…….. I hope so. …
Me too.
(Xey try not to sound so guilty about it)
How do you deal with scary stuff after it’s happened? How do you… get over it? Not the right words, but I don’t know how to phrase it…
(Cherri still doesn’t look at xem)
I… ‘m the wrong person to ask.
(He hesitates, then speaks even more softly)
usually I just try to kill myself again, or get high when that doesn’t work.
Mm.
(Xey nod)
I’m good at getting high… I don’t know if it helps all that much though.
Yeah… I- I try to be alright.
‘S all.. we can do… sometimes.
Yeah.. and sometimes it is almost enough
Very true. Sometimes almost enough is the best it gets…
Yeah…..
(They sigh, curling up a bit)
It’s not great, but it’s what we have.
(Xey pull out Whyote, the coyote plush Vodka made that xey claimed, and play with it)
When we go back to the shack, I want to give Girlie a rock. A fun rock, but I don’t know what colour. What colour do you think I should find?
She likes orange, I think she likes sedimentary ones..? I should- should find one for her
(He makes an obvious effort to speak a little louder)
We could look together, if you like.
(Xey stand closer so xey can hear better)
I think the orange ones look nice.
Yeah.. … I don’t wanna go outside
(His voice falls back again, hushed)
That’s okay. I can bring rocks later, when I can go outside, I can bring them for your approval.
(Xey sound a little sad at the idea that xey’re not well enough to leave)
(Cherri actually looks up at that, though not enough to look Lexi in the face)
That sounds nice
(He’s still soft spoken, but now sounds cautiously optimistic about the idea)
Yea. It’ll be nice to be allowed to leave- and I’ll enjoy finding some fun rocks too. Maybe I’ll find a pink one.
Maybe
(He yawns, then frowns at himself. He doesn’t need more sleep)
There have to be some round here somewhere…
(Xey’re trying very hard not to think about the things bothering them)
Maybe I can find a blue one too. Or maybe I might find something else cool- I found a ship in a bottle under a cactus once.
Really? How’d it get in th’ bottle?
(He sounds genuinely curious, perking up. They glance over at the air around Lexi a few times, more worried)
(The static is still anxious, more anxious than sad now. Xey won’t admit it, but being poisoned scared them and is still scaring them)
I’m not sure, I think maybe the bottle was cut in half, then they put the ship inside and fixed the bottle again? The ship seemed quite cool…
Woah..
(Cherri focuses more fully on the air around Lexi, looking like he’s staring straight through xem at something real)
It had little sails and everything…
(Xey’re trying very hard to recall all the details, squeezing Whyote tighter unconsciously. It’s frustrating them that they can’t quite remember everything about it)
I think it had… an anchor on the side. I think it was black?
That does sound shiny. Maybe Show could find one like it.
You think ae would like one?
(Xey scrunch in concentration as they try to remember where they left the ship in a bottle, static reflecting more annoyance than xeir face does when they can’t remember)
I wish I knew what I did with it…
Ae finds ‘ll sorts ‘f stuff.. ‘s okay
So Pony will definitely find one eventually… maybe even the one I found.
(Xey hate not remembering properly anymore, but xey know there’s nothing they can do to fix it)
I like finding odd things. I like bottle caps- like the ones on my jacket. Found a lot of those in the desert.
D’y ever keep the bottles.?
Used to a lot more than now… Whiskey tossed my collection. I have a few in the back of our car still- pop bottles that probably aren’t made anymore.
Woah.. ‘s mean. I, uh- I have a few bottles, too
She was mean.
(There’s a not so tiny amount of anger that briefly mixes in with the anxiety before disappearing again)
Do they have different colours? I found a green one and a pink one…
I have a purple n some green ones! I don’t think I’ve got the caps anymore, though
Ooo purple… I think I had an orange one once. I think someone nicked it?
(Xey seem to be questioning the memory)
.. it was a nice shade of orange. The cap was green though.
‘ll show you m whole collection sometime
(He sounds genuinely excited and happy)
Will you? I’d love that!
(Xey smile, some actual joy cutting through the anxiety in the static)
(Cherri perks up, happy to see someone else excited too. He rocks back and forth, almost all the golden orange replaced with other colors)
(Seeing him perk up makes xem feel less anxious and more happy, smiling a little)
I’ll have to show you some of the other bottle caps I have too…
(He nods excitedly, humming louder than he usually talks)
(They smile more, putting Whyote down to fish out a beer bottle lid that’s multicoloured from their pocket)
I’ve had this one for ages, what do you think?
(Cherri watches it intently, head tilted)
Ooooo…….
Shiny right?
(Xey grin, showing it off proudly. They then get one out that seems to have been sun bleached slightly, part of it a different colour to the rest of the cap)
What about this one?
I like ‘m!
(Xey beam, very happy with that response)
Me too!
I don’ have any with me
(He sounds forlorn, although there’s three cherry coke cans and a handful of tabs on the side table)
(Xey nod and make a humming noise, and then fish through their pockets until they find a pastel pink bottle cap, and hold it out to him to take)
(They hold his hand out, hesitant)
For me?
Yea!
(Xey put it in his hand slowly, still grinning)
(He inspects it more closely, then looks at Lexi)
Thank you!
Hey Cherri, Vodka made Pepper a plush. Do you want it?
Mmh? ., ?
(He looks a little less like a complete wreck, but still mostly asleep)
I… he made two. A little rat, and one that looks like you…
(The Cherri plush is cute, crocheted with a pink tee and grey trousers. The rat is brown, and smaller than Pepper. Xey hold them out for approval)
(His hand shakes as they take them, and he smiles)
‘S shiny
I thought so too. I think he did a good job.
(Xey’re a little quieter than usual, still feeling a little off since the poisoning. Xeir static is anxious, and a little sad)
‘S really good at it..
(He sits up a little straighter, careful not to wake either Kobra or Pepper. They turn back to stare at Lexi)
‘Re you ok?
He is.
(Xey seem to deliberate on responding)
Less okay than I’d like to be… you haven’t seen Vodka, have you?
Mm m
(They shake their head, frowning)
Okay… he was here earlier, but I know he wanted to stretch his legs…
(Xey shake their head like they want to shake the thoughts out, careful not to move the arm xey had the drip in too much- the plaster still there)
Are you a little more shiny than before?
Mmm……..,
(They look away, down at the plushies and his cat and boyfriend)
some..
That’s good.
(Xey shrug, picking at a loose thread on their jeans. They feel very guilty still about Kobra hitting his head again)
Is he okay?
…….. I hope so. …
Me too.
(Xey try not to sound so guilty about it)
How do you deal with scary stuff after it’s happened? How do you… get over it? Not the right words, but I don’t know how to phrase it…
(Cherri still doesn’t look at xem)
I… ‘m the wrong person to ask.
(He hesitates, then speaks even more softly)
usually I just try to kill myself again, or get high when that doesn’t work.
Mm.
(Xey nod)
I’m good at getting high… I don’t know if it helps all that much though.
Yeah… I- I try to be alright.
‘S all.. we can do… sometimes.
Yeah.. and sometimes it is almost enough
Very true. Sometimes almost enough is the best it gets…
Yeah…..
(They sigh, curling up a bit)
It’s not great, but it’s what we have.
(Xey pull out Whyote, the coyote plush Vodka made that xey claimed, and play with it)
When we go back to the shack, I want to give Girlie a rock. A fun rock, but I don’t know what colour. What colour do you think I should find?
She likes orange, I think she likes sedimentary ones..? I should- should find one for her
(He makes an obvious effort to speak a little louder)
We could look together, if you like.
(Xey stand closer so xey can hear better)
I think the orange ones look nice.
Yeah.. … I don’t wanna go outside
(His voice falls back again, hushed)
That’s okay. I can bring rocks later, when I can go outside, I can bring them for your approval.
(Xey sound a little sad at the idea that xey’re not well enough to leave)
(Cherri actually looks up at that, though not enough to look Lexi in the face)
That sounds nice
(He’s still soft spoken, but now sounds cautiously optimistic about the idea)
Yea. It’ll be nice to be allowed to leave- and I’ll enjoy finding some fun rocks too. Maybe I’ll find a pink one.
Maybe
(He yawns, then frowns at himself. He doesn’t need more sleep)
There have to be some round here somewhere…
(Xey’re trying very hard not to think about the things bothering them)
Maybe I can find a blue one too. Or maybe I might find something else cool- I found a ship in a bottle under a cactus once.
Really? How’d it get in th’ bottle?
(He sounds genuinely curious, perking up. They glance over at the air around Lexi a few times, more worried)
(The static is still anxious, more anxious than sad now. Xey won’t admit it, but being poisoned scared them and is still scaring them)
I’m not sure, I think maybe the bottle was cut in half, then they put the ship inside and fixed the bottle again? The ship seemed quite cool…
Woah..
(Cherri focuses more fully on the air around Lexi, looking like he’s staring straight through xem at something real)
It had little sails and everything…
(Xey’re trying very hard to recall all the details, squeezing Whyote tighter unconsciously. It’s frustrating them that they can’t quite remember everything about it)
I think it had… an anchor on the side. I think it was black?
That does sound shiny. Maybe Show could find one like it.
You think ae would like one?
(Xey scrunch in concentration as they try to remember where they left the ship in a bottle, static reflecting more annoyance than xeir face does when they can’t remember)
I wish I knew what I did with it…
Ae finds ‘ll sorts ‘f stuff.. ‘s okay
So Pony will definitely find one eventually… maybe even the one I found.
(Xey hate not remembering properly anymore, but xey know there’s nothing they can do to fix it)
I like finding odd things. I like bottle caps- like the ones on my jacket. Found a lot of those in the desert.
D’y ever keep the bottles.?
Used to a lot more than now… Whiskey tossed my collection. I have a few in the back of our car still- pop bottles that probably aren’t made anymore.
Woah.. ‘s mean. I, uh- I have a few bottles, too
She was mean.
(There’s a not so tiny amount of anger that briefly mixes in with the anxiety before disappearing again)
Do they have different colours? I found a green one and a pink one…
I have a purple n some green ones! I don’t think I’ve got the caps anymore, though
Ooo purple… I think I had an orange one once. I think someone nicked it?
(Xey seem to be questioning the memory)
.. it was a nice shade of orange. The cap was green though.
‘ll show you m whole collection sometime
(He sounds genuinely excited and happy)
Will you? I’d love that!
(Xey smile, some actual joy cutting through the anxiety in the static)
(Cherri perks up, happy to see someone else excited too. He rocks back and forth, almost all the golden orange replaced with other colors)
(Seeing him perk up makes xem feel less anxious and more happy, smiling a little)
I’ll have to show you some of the other bottle caps I have too…
(He nods excitedly, humming louder than he usually talks)
(They smile more, putting Whyote down to fish out a beer bottle lid that’s multicoloured from their pocket)
I’ve had this one for ages, what do you think?
(Cherri watches it intently, head tilted)
Ooooo…….
Shiny right?
(Xey grin, showing it off proudly. They then get one out that seems to have been sun bleached slightly, part of it a different colour to the rest of the cap)
What about this one?
I like ‘m!
(Xey beam, very happy with that response)
Me too!
I don’ have any with me
(He sounds forlorn, although there’s three cherry coke cans and a handful of tabs on the side table)
(Xey nod and make a humming noise, and then fish through their pockets until they find a pastel pink bottle cap, and hold it out to him to take)
(They hold his hand out, hesitant)
For me?
Hey Cherri, Vodka made Pepper a plush. Do you want it?
Mmh? ., ?
(He looks a little less like a complete wreck, but still mostly asleep)
I… he made two. A little rat, and one that looks like you…
(The Cherri plush is cute, crocheted with a pink tee and grey trousers. The rat is brown, and smaller than Pepper. Xey hold them out for approval)
(His hand shakes as they take them, and he smiles)
‘S shiny
I thought so too. I think he did a good job.
(Xey’re a little quieter than usual, still feeling a little off since the poisoning. Xeir static is anxious, and a little sad)
‘S really good at it..
(He sits up a little straighter, careful not to wake either Kobra or Pepper. They turn back to stare at Lexi)
‘Re you ok?
He is.
(Xey seem to deliberate on responding)
Less okay than I’d like to be… you haven’t seen Vodka, have you?
Mm m
(They shake their head, frowning)
Okay… he was here earlier, but I know he wanted to stretch his legs…
(Xey shake their head like they want to shake the thoughts out, careful not to move the arm xey had the drip in too much- the plaster still there)
Are you a little more shiny than before?
Mmm……..,
(They look away, down at the plushies and his cat and boyfriend)
some..
That’s good.
(Xey shrug, picking at a loose thread on their jeans. They feel very guilty still about Kobra hitting his head again)
Is he okay?
…….. I hope so. …
Me too.
(Xey try not to sound so guilty about it)
How do you deal with scary stuff after it’s happened? How do you… get over it? Not the right words, but I don’t know how to phrase it…
(Cherri still doesn’t look at xem)
I… ‘m the wrong person to ask.
(He hesitates, then speaks even more softly)
usually I just try to kill myself again, or get high when that doesn’t work.
Mm.
(Xey nod)
I’m good at getting high… I don’t know if it helps all that much though.
Yeah… I- I try to be alright.
‘S all.. we can do… sometimes.
Yeah.. and sometimes it is almost enough
Very true. Sometimes almost enough is the best it gets…
Yeah…..
(They sigh, curling up a bit)
It’s not great, but it’s what we have.
(Xey pull out Whyote, the coyote plush Vodka made that xey claimed, and play with it)
When we go back to the shack, I want to give Girlie a rock. A fun rock, but I don’t know what colour. What colour do you think I should find?
She likes orange, I think she likes sedimentary ones..? I should- should find one for her
(He makes an obvious effort to speak a little louder)
We could look together, if you like.
(Xey stand closer so xey can hear better)
I think the orange ones look nice.
Yeah.. … I don’t wanna go outside
(His voice falls back again, hushed)
That’s okay. I can bring rocks later, when I can go outside, I can bring them for your approval.
(Xey sound a little sad at the idea that xey’re not well enough to leave)
(Cherri actually looks up at that, though not enough to look Lexi in the face)
That sounds nice
(He’s still soft spoken, but now sounds cautiously optimistic about the idea)
Yea. It’ll be nice to be allowed to leave- and I’ll enjoy finding some fun rocks too. Maybe I’ll find a pink one.
Maybe
(He yawns, then frowns at himself. He doesn’t need more sleep)
There have to be some round here somewhere…
(Xey’re trying very hard not to think about the things bothering them)
Maybe I can find a blue one too. Or maybe I might find something else cool- I found a ship in a bottle under a cactus once.
Really? How’d it get in th’ bottle?
(He sounds genuinely curious, perking up. They glance over at the air around Lexi a few times, more worried)
(The static is still anxious, more anxious than sad now. Xey won’t admit it, but being poisoned scared them and is still scaring them)
I’m not sure, I think maybe the bottle was cut in half, then they put the ship inside and fixed the bottle again? The ship seemed quite cool…
Woah..
(Cherri focuses more fully on the air around Lexi, looking like he’s staring straight through xem at something real)
It had little sails and everything…
(Xey’re trying very hard to recall all the details, squeezing Whyote tighter unconsciously. It’s frustrating them that they can’t quite remember everything about it)
I think it had… an anchor on the side. I think it was black?
That does sound shiny. Maybe Show could find one like it.
You think ae would like one?
(Xey scrunch in concentration as they try to remember where they left the ship in a bottle, static reflecting more annoyance than xeir face does when they can’t remember)
I wish I knew what I did with it…
Ae finds ‘ll sorts ‘f stuff.. ‘s okay
So Pony will definitely find one eventually… maybe even the one I found.
(Xey hate not remembering properly anymore, but xey know there’s nothing they can do to fix it)
I like finding odd things. I like bottle caps- like the ones on my jacket. Found a lot of those in the desert.
D’y ever keep the bottles.?
Used to a lot more than now… Whiskey tossed my collection. I have a few in the back of our car still- pop bottles that probably aren’t made anymore.
Woah.. ‘s mean. I, uh- I have a few bottles, too
She was mean.
(There’s a not so tiny amount of anger that briefly mixes in with the anxiety before disappearing again)
Do they have different colours? I found a green one and a pink one…
I have a purple n some green ones! I don’t think I’ve got the caps anymore, though
Ooo purple… I think I had an orange one once. I think someone nicked it?
(Xey seem to be questioning the memory)
.. it was a nice shade of orange. The cap was green though.
‘ll show you m whole collection sometime
(He sounds genuinely excited and happy)
Will you? I’d love that!
(Xey smile, some actual joy cutting through the anxiety in the static)
(Cherri perks up, happy to see someone else excited too. He rocks back and forth, almost all the golden orange replaced with other colors)
(Seeing him perk up makes xem feel less anxious and more happy, smiling a little)
I’ll have to show you some of the other bottle caps I have too…
(He nods excitedly, humming louder than he usually talks)
(They smile more, putting Whyote down to fish out a beer bottle lid that’s multicoloured from their pocket)
I’ve had this one for ages, what do you think?
(Cherri watches it intently, head tilted)
Ooooo…….
Shiny right?
(Xey grin, showing it off proudly. They then get one out that seems to have been sun bleached slightly, part of it a different colour to the rest of the cap)
What about this one?
I like ‘m!
(Xey beam, very happy with that response)
Me too!
I don’ have any with me
(He sounds forlorn, although there’s three cherry coke cans and a handful of tabs on the side table)
Hey Cherri, Vodka made Pepper a plush. Do you want it?
Mmh? ., ?
(He looks a little less like a complete wreck, but still mostly asleep)
I… he made two. A little rat, and one that looks like you…
(The Cherri plush is cute, crocheted with a pink tee and grey trousers. The rat is brown, and smaller than Pepper. Xey hold them out for approval)
(His hand shakes as they take them, and he smiles)
‘S shiny
I thought so too. I think he did a good job.
(Xey’re a little quieter than usual, still feeling a little off since the poisoning. Xeir static is anxious, and a little sad)
‘S really good at it..
(He sits up a little straighter, careful not to wake either Kobra or Pepper. They turn back to stare at Lexi)
‘Re you ok?
He is.
(Xey seem to deliberate on responding)
Less okay than I’d like to be… you haven’t seen Vodka, have you?
Mm m
(They shake their head, frowning)
Okay… he was here earlier, but I know he wanted to stretch his legs…
(Xey shake their head like they want to shake the thoughts out, careful not to move the arm xey had the drip in too much- the plaster still there)
Are you a little more shiny than before?
Mmm……..,
(They look away, down at the plushies and his cat and boyfriend)
some..
That’s good.
(Xey shrug, picking at a loose thread on their jeans. They feel very guilty still about Kobra hitting his head again)
Is he okay?
…….. I hope so. …
Me too.
(Xey try not to sound so guilty about it)
How do you deal with scary stuff after it’s happened? How do you… get over it? Not the right words, but I don’t know how to phrase it…
(Cherri still doesn’t look at xem)
I… ‘m the wrong person to ask.
(He hesitates, then speaks even more softly)
usually I just try to kill myself again, or get high when that doesn’t work.
Mm.
(Xey nod)
I’m good at getting high… I don’t know if it helps all that much though.
Yeah… I- I try to be alright.
‘S all.. we can do… sometimes.
Yeah.. and sometimes it is almost enough
Very true. Sometimes almost enough is the best it gets…
Yeah…..
(They sigh, curling up a bit)
It’s not great, but it’s what we have.
(Xey pull out Whyote, the coyote plush Vodka made that xey claimed, and play with it)
When we go back to the shack, I want to give Girlie a rock. A fun rock, but I don’t know what colour. What colour do you think I should find?
She likes orange, I think she likes sedimentary ones..? I should- should find one for her
(He makes an obvious effort to speak a little louder)
We could look together, if you like.
(Xey stand closer so xey can hear better)
I think the orange ones look nice.
Yeah.. … I don’t wanna go outside
(His voice falls back again, hushed)
That’s okay. I can bring rocks later, when I can go outside, I can bring them for your approval.
(Xey sound a little sad at the idea that xey’re not well enough to leave)
(Cherri actually looks up at that, though not enough to look Lexi in the face)
That sounds nice
(He’s still soft spoken, but now sounds cautiously optimistic about the idea)
Yea. It’ll be nice to be allowed to leave- and I’ll enjoy finding some fun rocks too. Maybe I’ll find a pink one.
Maybe
(He yawns, then frowns at himself. He doesn’t need more sleep)
There have to be some round here somewhere…
(Xey’re trying very hard not to think about the things bothering them)
Maybe I can find a blue one too. Or maybe I might find something else cool- I found a ship in a bottle under a cactus once.
Really? How’d it get in th’ bottle?
(He sounds genuinely curious, perking up. They glance over at the air around Lexi a few times, more worried)
(The static is still anxious, more anxious than sad now. Xey won’t admit it, but being poisoned scared them and is still scaring them)
I’m not sure, I think maybe the bottle was cut in half, then they put the ship inside and fixed the bottle again? The ship seemed quite cool…
Woah..
(Cherri focuses more fully on the air around Lexi, looking like he’s staring straight through xem at something real)
It had little sails and everything…
(Xey’re trying very hard to recall all the details, squeezing Whyote tighter unconsciously. It’s frustrating them that they can’t quite remember everything about it)
I think it had… an anchor on the side. I think it was black?
That does sound shiny. Maybe Show could find one like it.
You think ae would like one?
(Xey scrunch in concentration as they try to remember where they left the ship in a bottle, static reflecting more annoyance than xeir face does when they can’t remember)
I wish I knew what I did with it…
Ae finds ‘ll sorts ‘f stuff.. ‘s okay
So Pony will definitely find one eventually… maybe even the one I found.
(Xey hate not remembering properly anymore, but xey know there’s nothing they can do to fix it)
I like finding odd things. I like bottle caps- like the ones on my jacket. Found a lot of those in the desert.
D’y ever keep the bottles.?
Used to a lot more than now… Whiskey tossed my collection. I have a few in the back of our car still- pop bottles that probably aren’t made anymore.
Woah.. ‘s mean. I, uh- I have a few bottles, too
She was mean.
(There’s a not so tiny amount of anger that briefly mixes in with the anxiety before disappearing again)
Do they have different colours? I found a green one and a pink one…
I have a purple n some green ones! I don’t think I’ve got the caps anymore, though
Ooo purple… I think I had an orange one once. I think someone nicked it?
(Xey seem to be questioning the memory)
.. it was a nice shade of orange. The cap was green though.
‘ll show you m whole collection sometime
(He sounds genuinely excited and happy)
Will you? I’d love that!
(Xey smile, some actual joy cutting through the anxiety in the static)
(Cherri perks up, happy to see someone else excited too. He rocks back and forth, almost all the golden orange replaced with other colors)
(Seeing him perk up makes xem feel less anxious and more happy, smiling a little)
I’ll have to show you some of the other bottle caps I have too…
(He nods excitedly, humming louder than he usually talks)
(They smile more, putting Whyote down to fish out a beer bottle lid that’s multicoloured from their pocket)
I’ve had this one for ages, what do you think?
(Cherri watches it intently, head tilted)
Ooooo…….
Shiny right?
(Xey grin, showing it off proudly. They then get one out that seems to have been sun bleached slightly, part of it a different colour to the rest of the cap)
What about this one?
I like ‘m!
Hey Cherri, Vodka made Pepper a plush. Do you want it?
Mmh? ., ?
(He looks a little less like a complete wreck, but still mostly asleep)
I… he made two. A little rat, and one that looks like you…
(The Cherri plush is cute, crocheted with a pink tee and grey trousers. The rat is brown, and smaller than Pepper. Xey hold them out for approval)
(His hand shakes as they take them, and he smiles)
‘S shiny
I thought so too. I think he did a good job.
(Xey’re a little quieter than usual, still feeling a little off since the poisoning. Xeir static is anxious, and a little sad)
‘S really good at it..
(He sits up a little straighter, careful not to wake either Kobra or Pepper. They turn back to stare at Lexi)
‘Re you ok?
He is.
(Xey seem to deliberate on responding)
Less okay than I’d like to be… you haven’t seen Vodka, have you?
Mm m
(They shake their head, frowning)
Okay… he was here earlier, but I know he wanted to stretch his legs…
(Xey shake their head like they want to shake the thoughts out, careful not to move the arm xey had the drip in too much- the plaster still there)
Are you a little more shiny than before?
Mmm……..,
(They look away, down at the plushies and his cat and boyfriend)
some..
That’s good.
(Xey shrug, picking at a loose thread on their jeans. They feel very guilty still about Kobra hitting his head again)
Is he okay?
…….. I hope so. …
Me too.
(Xey try not to sound so guilty about it)
How do you deal with scary stuff after it’s happened? How do you… get over it? Not the right words, but I don’t know how to phrase it…
(Cherri still doesn’t look at xem)
I… ‘m the wrong person to ask.
(He hesitates, then speaks even more softly)
usually I just try to kill myself again, or get high when that doesn’t work.
Mm.
(Xey nod)
I’m good at getting high… I don’t know if it helps all that much though.
Yeah… I- I try to be alright.
‘S all.. we can do… sometimes.
Yeah.. and sometimes it is almost enough
Very true. Sometimes almost enough is the best it gets…
Yeah…..
(They sigh, curling up a bit)
It’s not great, but it’s what we have.
(Xey pull out Whyote, the coyote plush Vodka made that xey claimed, and play with it)
When we go back to the shack, I want to give Girlie a rock. A fun rock, but I don’t know what colour. What colour do you think I should find?
She likes orange, I think she likes sedimentary ones..? I should- should find one for her
(He makes an obvious effort to speak a little louder)
We could look together, if you like.
(Xey stand closer so xey can hear better)
I think the orange ones look nice.
Yeah.. … I don’t wanna go outside
(His voice falls back again, hushed)
That’s okay. I can bring rocks later, when I can go outside, I can bring them for your approval.
(Xey sound a little sad at the idea that xey’re not well enough to leave)
(Cherri actually looks up at that, though not enough to look Lexi in the face)
That sounds nice
(He’s still soft spoken, but now sounds cautiously optimistic about the idea)
Yea. It’ll be nice to be allowed to leave- and I’ll enjoy finding some fun rocks too. Maybe I’ll find a pink one.
Maybe
(He yawns, then frowns at himself. He doesn’t need more sleep)
There have to be some round here somewhere…
(Xey’re trying very hard not to think about the things bothering them)
Maybe I can find a blue one too. Or maybe I might find something else cool- I found a ship in a bottle under a cactus once.
Really? How’d it get in th’ bottle?
(He sounds genuinely curious, perking up. They glance over at the air around Lexi a few times, more worried)
(The static is still anxious, more anxious than sad now. Xey won’t admit it, but being poisoned scared them and is still scaring them)
I’m not sure, I think maybe the bottle was cut in half, then they put the ship inside and fixed the bottle again? The ship seemed quite cool…
Woah..
(Cherri focuses more fully on the air around Lexi, looking like he’s staring straight through xem at something real)
It had little sails and everything…
(Xey’re trying very hard to recall all the details, squeezing Whyote tighter unconsciously. It’s frustrating them that they can’t quite remember everything about it)
I think it had… an anchor on the side. I think it was black?
That does sound shiny. Maybe Show could find one like it.
You think ae would like one?
(Xey scrunch in concentration as they try to remember where they left the ship in a bottle, static reflecting more annoyance than xeir face does when they can’t remember)
I wish I knew what I did with it…
Ae finds ‘ll sorts ‘f stuff.. ‘s okay
So Pony will definitely find one eventually… maybe even the one I found.
(Xey hate not remembering properly anymore, but xey know there’s nothing they can do to fix it)
I like finding odd things. I like bottle caps- like the ones on my jacket. Found a lot of those in the desert.
D’y ever keep the bottles.?
Used to a lot more than now… Whiskey tossed my collection. I have a few in the back of our car still- pop bottles that probably aren’t made anymore.
Woah.. ‘s mean. I, uh- I have a few bottles, too
She was mean.
(There’s a not so tiny amount of anger that briefly mixes in with the anxiety before disappearing again)
Do they have different colours? I found a green one and a pink one…
I have a purple n some green ones! I don’t think I’ve got the caps anymore, though
Ooo purple… I think I had an orange one once. I think someone nicked it?
(Xey seem to be questioning the memory)
.. it was a nice shade of orange. The cap was green though.
‘ll show you m whole collection sometime
(He sounds genuinely excited and happy)
Will you? I’d love that!
(Xey smile, some actual joy cutting through the anxiety in the static)
(Cherri perks up, happy to see someone else excited too. He rocks back and forth, almost all the golden orange replaced with other colors)
(Seeing him perk up makes xem feel less anxious and more happy, smiling a little)
I’ll have to show you some of the other bottle caps I have too…
(He nods excitedly, humming louder than he usually talks)
(They smile more, putting Whyote down to fish out a beer bottle lid that’s multicoloured from their pocket)
I’ve had this one for ages, what do you think?
(Cherri watches it intently, head tilted)
Ooooo…….
Hey Cherri, Vodka made Pepper a plush. Do you want it?
Mmh? ., ?
(He looks a little less like a complete wreck, but still mostly asleep)
I… he made two. A little rat, and one that looks like you…
(The Cherri plush is cute, crocheted with a pink tee and grey trousers. The rat is brown, and smaller than Pepper. Xey hold them out for approval)
(His hand shakes as they take them, and he smiles)
‘S shiny
I thought so too. I think he did a good job.
(Xey’re a little quieter than usual, still feeling a little off since the poisoning. Xeir static is anxious, and a little sad)
‘S really good at it..
(He sits up a little straighter, careful not to wake either Kobra or Pepper. They turn back to stare at Lexi)
‘Re you ok?
He is.
(Xey seem to deliberate on responding)
Less okay than I’d like to be… you haven’t seen Vodka, have you?
Mm m
(They shake their head, frowning)
Okay… he was here earlier, but I know he wanted to stretch his legs…
(Xey shake their head like they want to shake the thoughts out, careful not to move the arm xey had the drip in too much- the plaster still there)
Are you a little more shiny than before?
Mmm……..,
(They look away, down at the plushies and his cat and boyfriend)
some..
That’s good.
(Xey shrug, picking at a loose thread on their jeans. They feel very guilty still about Kobra hitting his head again)
Is he okay?
…….. I hope so. …
Me too.
(Xey try not to sound so guilty about it)
How do you deal with scary stuff after it’s happened? How do you… get over it? Not the right words, but I don’t know how to phrase it…
(Cherri still doesn’t look at xem)
I… ‘m the wrong person to ask.
(He hesitates, then speaks even more softly)
usually I just try to kill myself again, or get high when that doesn’t work.
Mm.
(Xey nod)
I’m good at getting high… I don’t know if it helps all that much though.
Yeah… I- I try to be alright.
‘S all.. we can do… sometimes.
Yeah.. and sometimes it is almost enough
Very true. Sometimes almost enough is the best it gets…
Yeah…..
(They sigh, curling up a bit)
It’s not great, but it’s what we have.
(Xey pull out Whyote, the coyote plush Vodka made that xey claimed, and play with it)
When we go back to the shack, I want to give Girlie a rock. A fun rock, but I don’t know what colour. What colour do you think I should find?
She likes orange, I think she likes sedimentary ones..? I should- should find one for her
(He makes an obvious effort to speak a little louder)
We could look together, if you like.
(Xey stand closer so xey can hear better)
I think the orange ones look nice.
Yeah.. … I don’t wanna go outside
(His voice falls back again, hushed)
That’s okay. I can bring rocks later, when I can go outside, I can bring them for your approval.
(Xey sound a little sad at the idea that xey’re not well enough to leave)
(Cherri actually looks up at that, though not enough to look Lexi in the face)
That sounds nice
(He’s still soft spoken, but now sounds cautiously optimistic about the idea)
Yea. It’ll be nice to be allowed to leave- and I’ll enjoy finding some fun rocks too. Maybe I’ll find a pink one.
Maybe
(He yawns, then frowns at himself. He doesn’t need more sleep)
There have to be some round here somewhere…
(Xey’re trying very hard not to think about the things bothering them)
Maybe I can find a blue one too. Or maybe I might find something else cool- I found a ship in a bottle under a cactus once.
Really? How’d it get in th’ bottle?
(He sounds genuinely curious, perking up. They glance over at the air around Lexi a few times, more worried)
(The static is still anxious, more anxious than sad now. Xey won’t admit it, but being poisoned scared them and is still scaring them)
I’m not sure, I think maybe the bottle was cut in half, then they put the ship inside and fixed the bottle again? The ship seemed quite cool…
Woah..
(Cherri focuses more fully on the air around Lexi, looking like he’s staring straight through xem at something real)
It had little sails and everything…
(Xey’re trying very hard to recall all the details, squeezing Whyote tighter unconsciously. It’s frustrating them that they can’t quite remember everything about it)
I think it had… an anchor on the side. I think it was black?
That does sound shiny. Maybe Show could find one like it.
You think ae would like one?
(Xey scrunch in concentration as they try to remember where they left the ship in a bottle, static reflecting more annoyance than xeir face does when they can’t remember)
I wish I knew what I did with it…
Ae finds ‘ll sorts ‘f stuff.. ‘s okay
So Pony will definitely find one eventually… maybe even the one I found.
(Xey hate not remembering properly anymore, but xey know there’s nothing they can do to fix it)
I like finding odd things. I like bottle caps- like the ones on my jacket. Found a lot of those in the desert.
D’y ever keep the bottles.?
Used to a lot more than now… Whiskey tossed my collection. I have a few in the back of our car still- pop bottles that probably aren’t made anymore.
Woah.. ‘s mean. I, uh- I have a few bottles, too
She was mean.
(There’s a not so tiny amount of anger that briefly mixes in with the anxiety before disappearing again)
Do they have different colours? I found a green one and a pink one…
I have a purple n some green ones! I don’t think I’ve got the caps anymore, though
Ooo purple… I think I had an orange one once. I think someone nicked it?
(Xey seem to be questioning the memory)
.. it was a nice shade of orange. The cap was green though.
‘ll show you m whole collection sometime
(He sounds genuinely excited and happy)
Will you? I’d love that!
(Xey smile, some actual joy cutting through the anxiety in the static)
(Cherri perks up, happy to see someone else excited too. He rocks back and forth, almost all the golden orange replaced with other colors)
(Seeing him perk up makes xem feel less anxious and more happy, smiling a little)
I’ll have to show you some of the other bottle caps I have too…
(He nods excitedly, humming louder than he usually talks)
Hey Cherri, Vodka made Pepper a plush. Do you want it?
Mmh? ., ?
(He looks a little less like a complete wreck, but still mostly asleep)
I… he made two. A little rat, and one that looks like you…
(The Cherri plush is cute, crocheted with a pink tee and grey trousers. The rat is brown, and smaller than Pepper. Xey hold them out for approval)
(His hand shakes as they take them, and he smiles)
‘S shiny
I thought so too. I think he did a good job.
(Xey’re a little quieter than usual, still feeling a little off since the poisoning. Xeir static is anxious, and a little sad)
‘S really good at it..
(He sits up a little straighter, careful not to wake either Kobra or Pepper. They turn back to stare at Lexi)
‘Re you ok?
He is.
(Xey seem to deliberate on responding)
Less okay than I’d like to be… you haven’t seen Vodka, have you?
Mm m
(They shake their head, frowning)
Okay… he was here earlier, but I know he wanted to stretch his legs…
(Xey shake their head like they want to shake the thoughts out, careful not to move the arm xey had the drip in too much- the plaster still there)
Are you a little more shiny than before?
Mmm……..,
(They look away, down at the plushies and his cat and boyfriend)
some..
That’s good.
(Xey shrug, picking at a loose thread on their jeans. They feel very guilty still about Kobra hitting his head again)
Is he okay?
…….. I hope so. …
Me too.
(Xey try not to sound so guilty about it)
How do you deal with scary stuff after it’s happened? How do you… get over it? Not the right words, but I don’t know how to phrase it…
(Cherri still doesn’t look at xem)
I… ‘m the wrong person to ask.
(He hesitates, then speaks even more softly)
usually I just try to kill myself again, or get high when that doesn’t work.
Mm.
(Xey nod)
I’m good at getting high… I don’t know if it helps all that much though.
Yeah… I- I try to be alright.
‘S all.. we can do… sometimes.
Yeah.. and sometimes it is almost enough
Very true. Sometimes almost enough is the best it gets…
Yeah…..
(They sigh, curling up a bit)
It’s not great, but it’s what we have.
(Xey pull out Whyote, the coyote plush Vodka made that xey claimed, and play with it)
When we go back to the shack, I want to give Girlie a rock. A fun rock, but I don’t know what colour. What colour do you think I should find?
She likes orange, I think she likes sedimentary ones..? I should- should find one for her
(He makes an obvious effort to speak a little louder)
We could look together, if you like.
(Xey stand closer so xey can hear better)
I think the orange ones look nice.
Yeah.. … I don’t wanna go outside
(His voice falls back again, hushed)
That’s okay. I can bring rocks later, when I can go outside, I can bring them for your approval.
(Xey sound a little sad at the idea that xey’re not well enough to leave)
(Cherri actually looks up at that, though not enough to look Lexi in the face)
That sounds nice
(He’s still soft spoken, but now sounds cautiously optimistic about the idea)
Yea. It’ll be nice to be allowed to leave- and I’ll enjoy finding some fun rocks too. Maybe I’ll find a pink one.
Maybe
(He yawns, then frowns at himself. He doesn’t need more sleep)
There have to be some round here somewhere…
(Xey’re trying very hard not to think about the things bothering them)
Maybe I can find a blue one too. Or maybe I might find something else cool- I found a ship in a bottle under a cactus once.
Really? How’d it get in th’ bottle?
(He sounds genuinely curious, perking up. They glance over at the air around Lexi a few times, more worried)
(The static is still anxious, more anxious than sad now. Xey won’t admit it, but being poisoned scared them and is still scaring them)
I’m not sure, I think maybe the bottle was cut in half, then they put the ship inside and fixed the bottle again? The ship seemed quite cool…
Woah..
(Cherri focuses more fully on the air around Lexi, looking like he’s staring straight through xem at something real)
It had little sails and everything…
(Xey’re trying very hard to recall all the details, squeezing Whyote tighter unconsciously. It’s frustrating them that they can’t quite remember everything about it)
I think it had… an anchor on the side. I think it was black?
That does sound shiny. Maybe Show could find one like it.
You think ae would like one?
(Xey scrunch in concentration as they try to remember where they left the ship in a bottle, static reflecting more annoyance than xeir face does when they can’t remember)
I wish I knew what I did with it…
Ae finds ‘ll sorts ‘f stuff.. ‘s okay
So Pony will definitely find one eventually… maybe even the one I found.
(Xey hate not remembering properly anymore, but xey know there’s nothing they can do to fix it)
I like finding odd things. I like bottle caps- like the ones on my jacket. Found a lot of those in the desert.
D’y ever keep the bottles.?
Used to a lot more than now… Whiskey tossed my collection. I have a few in the back of our car still- pop bottles that probably aren’t made anymore.
Woah.. ‘s mean. I, uh- I have a few bottles, too
She was mean.
(There’s a not so tiny amount of anger that briefly mixes in with the anxiety before disappearing again)
Do they have different colours? I found a green one and a pink one…
I have a purple n some green ones! I don’t think I’ve got the caps anymore, though
Ooo purple… I think I had an orange one once. I think someone nicked it?
(Xey seem to be questioning the memory)
.. it was a nice shade of orange. The cap was green though.
‘ll show you m whole collection sometime
(He sounds genuinely excited and happy)
Will you? I’d love that!
(Xey smile, some actual joy cutting through the anxiety in the static)
(Cherri perks up, happy to see someone else excited too. He rocks back and forth, almost all the golden orange replaced with other colors)
