Sunken Hopes, Drowning Dreams

| Axl/Cas/Crypt ☆ Any prns ☆ 19 | 《Pagan Wiccan》

[cryptkeepersshadow]

🕯️ Introduction Post 🕯️

Hi, I'm Axl / Cas / Crypt.

I’m 18, use any pronouns (although they/them is not preferred) , and I’m Pagan Wiccan.

This blog is a space for:

🪐 Disability advocacy & neurodivergent honesty

🕸 Gothic aesthetics

🏎 My love of Formula 1 (yes, I scream during races)

🌅 Photography

💜 Personal posts, unfiltered emotions, and quiet moments

🌊 Criticism, message or use the asks if there's anything you want worded or spoken about 💜

I’m disabled, I’m autistic, and I’m not interested in shrinking myself to make others more comfortable. If that unsettles you, this probably isn’t the blog for you.

📌 DNI: Ableists, bigots, “devil’s advocate” types, or anyone who thinks tone policing is activism.

📌 Yes, I bite.

🕸️ speak kindly or not at all, criticism is welcomed, being a twat is not.

🕸️ tone tags welcome, silence respected, boundaries sharp

Feel free to interact, reblog, or just scroll. This space is completely mine.

My bandom ableism posts, feel free to argue but know I'm right:

Post by @cryptkeepersshadow

💬 3  🔁 181  ❤️ 131 · BAND SPACES ARE NOT SAFE FOR DISABLED PEOPLE. Not because we haven’t spoken up. We have. Repeatedly. Quietly. L

Reblog by @cryptkeepersshadow

💬 0  🔁 54  ❤️ 31 · Also (because apaprently it needs said) Speaking up for someone isn’t the same thing as speaking over them. There’s a h

Reblog by @cryptkeepersshadow

💬 0  🔁 6  ❤️ 15 · Yeah but flashing lights aren’t just an “artistic choice,” they’re literally dangerous for some people. Like we’re not tal

[manuciruja]

awww the like button turns into a rainbow when you press it! that's so cute...hey staff what's with all the trans women you keep nuking?

[manuciruja]

i think we should be ridiculing them more for this. you don't get to try and go all "queer website" when your staff likes to go on nuking sprees targeting the trans fem users

[hrsocials]

.seventy :) that one dj khaled tweet lol. also i do think that hollanov soft launch would begin with ilya soft launching being woke eventually launching being Bisexual And Better Than You Because of It

[natnormalatall]

roald dahl was antisemitic and misogynistic. george orwell was openly homophobic. edgar allan poe married his 13 year old cousin. dr seuss cheated on his wife (and was racist as well as antisemitic!). hp lovecraft was racist as fuck. anyways they’re fucking dead it’s not like you’re enabling their behaviors in the afterlife or something. then again I think they bleed into the books so uh keep an eye out for that

the difference between these old white guys and jk rowling is that the former group is all dead. jk rowling is alive and using your money to oppress trans people

[bad3idea3]

So Ilya and Shane's first game against the Bears post-outing is a surprising delight. It starts with a jumbotron video of street interviews of Boston fans being like "Yeah we thought Rozy was a total fucking idiot going to Ottawa but DAMN, moving for sexiest hockey player of the year Shane Hollander makes a lot more sense" which then fades into an Ilya Rozanov tribute video interspersed with various thirst-trappy videos of Shane to the song "Where is my Husband?" by Raye.

Ilya is delighted and even does the whole hand-waving choreography for "I would like a ring, a diamond ring" part in Shane's face as he blushes. He does this with his non-dominant hand of course, because they have been holding hands the whole video. (Shane will buy Ilya 7 different high-end diamond rings on Newbury Street the next day for him to pick from. Ilya like a good Slavic trophy spouse will pick all of them.)

And at the end, at the "Grandma said it," part cameras cut to Cliff Marlow in a curly gray wig and fake glasses shouting "Your husband is coming, Roz, don't fuck it up!

[gregtom]

[k-simplex-deactivated20241001]

Happy Pride

[gaygoatshane]

ilya promising children cash if they win knowing he's gonna let them win and then asking shane for money because he doesn't have his wallet. he wasn't even an annoying husband yet but he was letting shane know his potential

[fieldsofpoppies-in-salt-air]

rip ilya rozanov ik the "yo mama" time period was so miserable for you 😔

[cryptkeepersshadow]

"My mother is angel"

"Everyone thinks their mom is great"

"No is dead"

[fieldsofpoppies-in-salt-air]

he does win face offs at least 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

[fieldsofpoppies-in-salt-air]

rip ilya rozanov ik the "yo mama" time period was so miserable for you 😔

[cryptkeepersshadow]

"My mother is angel"

"Everyone thinks their mom is great"

"No is dead"

[dropofbittersea]

https://archiveofourown.org/works/82668686

[scartafacci]

when they ask him if he’s looking forward to facing shane and ilya replies, “he is goalie now, yes?”, he finds if so fun, he just keeps doing it, and he’s obviously a bit more of an asshole about it every time.

“shane hollander? sorry, i don’t know the names of all assistant coaches.”

“shane hollander? the zamboni driver for montreal? does good job, sure, but i have seen smoother ice.”

“shane hollander? who is that? does he sell popcorn during the games so that he can at least watch from afar?”

“shane hollander? you mean the guy who has coffee cart outside the arena because selling iced drinks is the closest he will get to hockey?”

“shane hollander? of course i remember him. he is park guide now, did you know? yes that is the closest he will get to sticks.”

(to the journalist) “shane hollander? is that the name of your son? does he want my autograph?”

and of course ilya also knows that those answers will get him angry sex every time, so he feels very encouraged to continue.

[chortlebot]

remake of this classic

[maxxie-or-smth]

you've met me at a very "yeah i'm trying to work on that" time in my life

[ozempicofficial]

[hrsocials]

.seventy-nine. a small offering, but more on this tomorrow.

[agent-odessa-over]

Yuna invites Ilya over for lunch. He is tempted to decline, believing it to be motivated by pity, but Shane is in Montreal and the loneliness of rambling around his too-big Ottowa house starts to feel like living in a mausoleum, so he accepts. It is this afternoon that he learns Shane's darkest secret. Darkest in name only, because it turns out to be quite the opposite in appearance.

After lunch they are seated in the den, fondly flipping through old photograph albums, when Ilya spies one that makes him lean over and squint. In the way of disposable camera film from the early aughts, it is grainy and overexposed, but there are no mistaking the warm brown eyes and pouty lips of Shane Hollander, looking blank faced at the camera. What comes as a surprise are the bleached blond ends of his dark hair, styled into crunchy looking spikes with obscene amounts of product.

Ilya emits a noise that can only be described as a squawk. Hand clapped to his mouth, because he barely trusts himself to speak, he chokes out, "What is...this?"

Yuna glances over nonchalantly. "Oh, that. Shane begged me to let him get frosted tips when he was 12."

Ilya will die. He will die right here, gagging on suppressed laughter, and Yuna will be forced to clean the mess of his remains off the berber carpet.

"I think he was trying to emulate some boy band he was obsessed with then. NSYNC maybe? I thought it was a bad idea, but David convinced me to let him try it out. Shane was going through a moody period, and he thought it might help."

"And-" Ilya squeaks in way too high a pitch, then clears his throat. "Ahem. And did it?"

Yuna thinks. "Hard to say. God, he was a bit of a bitchy preteen." She chuckles. "He had a poster of Lance Bass taped to his closet door. In hindsight, I should have guessed the gay thing much earlier."

Ilya can no longer contain his laughter. He doubles over with it, waving his hand and wheezing, "Sorry, sorry." He wipes tears from his eyes. "I can have this picture?"

Yuna shrugs. "Sure. The poster is probably still upstairs in his closet, if you want that, too. I've been meaning to clear it out-"

Ilya just stares at Yuna in wide eyed wonder. "Yes. I want." He dashes up the stairs so fast he nearly trips.

[halftoning-deactivated20240224]

cmyk test pages r like angels to me

[halftoning-deactivated20240224]

do you understand

[mortimermcmirestinks]

I made you something OP