Sydney has scurvy because he was cursed to only eat buttered toast
Sydney has, canonically if I remember right, mushrooms in his hair. Also worms. Not. Not in his hair, just. On his desk. Mobility issues canon, I don't remember if the wrist brace type canes are canon though. Also has the most amazing ability to just accepts the most batshit insane things. Like "Yeah, the penguins are attacking. And?", "Okay kids, not forget to give the offerings to the infinite loop duck", "today the bathroom is full of slime. Also I'm allergic to it. Today's breakfast is Mike Surprise." And he talks to his recorder...... "Right, you are a tape recorder, you cannot consent." He's been a sacrifice multiple times.
SYDNEYSYDNEYSNYEDNEDY YOU CANNOT TELL ME HES NOT BEUTIFUL #VOTE SYDNEY
Sibling Rane (The Silt Verses):
According to HROwen, the VA, they are ripped and dressed very sluttily at all times
GO RANE VOTE RANE!!!!! They stuck by their doomed crush throughout his mental breakdown up until the very moment he drowned them, and before that they shadow-ran the cult he started!
They also! Literally refused to give up on the act that their doomed crush was Totally Sane And Fine And Great Actually up until the LITERAL moment they drowned!! They ALSO at the same time were using that doomed crush as a figurehead for their own political agenda the whole time, while fooling everyone including themself into believing the opposite was true
Additional propaganda below the cut:
Sydney Sargent (Camp Here & There):
Sydney has guys from many planes of existence fawning all over him (and visions)
(spoilers below)
heās a fat goth femme trans man and everyone wants him SOOOOO bad
his boyfriend literally broke the fabric of reality to resurrect him
another guy was so obsessed with him he stalked him and tried to sacrifice him on a pyre
a third guy is the literal devil from the bible and brother sydney is that apple
fourth guy has a normal crush but thatās only because heās standing next to the other three . he went on a five minute rant about the hypothetical beautiful marriage and children he would have with sydney
heās pulling qprs like pokemon
has canonically been described with beautiful hair and nice hips
#Jarchivist the guy whose days got worse and worse until he caused the apocalypse AND THE DAYS KEPT GETTING WORSE #Is the wettest cat
Sorry buddy, the guy whos been kidnapped so many times and forcefully lotioned is the bigger wet cat. Not to mention he ACTUALLY died
John is THE wet cat!
Jedidah Martin (Camp Here & There):
I FUCKIGN REFUSE TO LET JEDDIE LOSE THAT MAN IS THEWET CAT. HAVE YOU HEARD HIM. TAKE ONE FUCKING LOOK AT THAT MAN. ITS OBVIOUS.
GGO MY JEDDIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
go to YouTube and listen to the compilation of every time he says Sydney. that's all the proof you need. he sounds MISERABLE, sad, scared, cold, wet, and like people are always laughing at him. he's awkward. he's avoidant. he's the king of yearning, pining and in the most doomed yaoi relationship of them all. he never shared his feelings but cries frequently. Italians hate him. lesbians love him. British people laugh at him. he has glasses. he loves Star wars. he only listens to game osts. he only wears dumb little khakis and dress shoesā¦
bonus jedidiah propaganda: the first time he got drunk at a party he asked the dj to play something off the skyrim ost
Additional propaganda below the cut:
Jedidah Martin (Camp Here & There):
Arthur is pitiful, yes, but Jedidiah is a pure loser this isnt even a competition
JEDDIESWEEP PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jedidiah, Arthur is more equipped to handle his situations than Jedidiah is to handle a relationship
WE DID NOT FUND SEASON 2 FOR JEDIDIAH TO LOSE THIS POOL
GGO MY JEDDIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
EVERYONE GO VOTE JEDDIE - a Sydney fictive
āSidkneeā ššš
#jedidiah is teh most pitiful trembling kicked dog in teh rain imaginable he constantly sounds like he is going to either cry or faint #idk who dis jeremy guy is but jedidiah has literally never sounded convincing or confident in his life and he has amounts of ocd #that even god has not seen before #I canāt explain it properly you just have to understand . heās liek a baby seal being put in water for teh first time and he HATES it #camp here and there
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