Always and Forever
words: 3.6k
pairing: Helmut Zemo x female reader
warnings: smut, fluffy smut, non penetrative sex, arguing, hand job, pussy job, aftercare, emotions, porn with plot, Zemo is a softie
A/n: sooo... this is awkward. I'm sorry I've been away for so long, I hope this makes up for it (check here if you want to know where I've been) I started this months ago and finished it just now. I hope nobody's upset. Love you all <3 Dividers by @firefly-graphics
My Masterlist
The air is heavy with moisture and dust. The tiny particles spread the light in a way that covers the room in an orange glow, almost as if he was looking at an old photograph. He gazes across the room, the little bed and wardrobe barely fitting inside. At least the mattress isn’t too shabby. The smell of stale and old furniture lingers everywhere and he doesn’t even dare to check how big the layer on top of the wardrobe actually is.
Still, he’s grateful for being safe at the moment. He’s not in prison anymore and he’s not in the grasp of any of Madripoor’s self proclaimed officials. It could have been worse than being a little uncomfortable.
There’s a small window on the wall. It’s locked, of course, Bucky didn’t trust him with his gun either so he’s not surprised. He looks over the street that’s visible from his room and sighs. Old memories of this place try to capture his mind and stop his brain from making logical decisions, but he won’t let that happen. There’s too much to lose.
Carefully, he takes off his gloves and places them on top of the nightstand. His coat finds its place on a hanger near the door and he even allows himself to take off his shoes. The situation is too dangerous to not be able to flee at any minute, but he grants himself this small freedom.
The pillow feels comforting, probably only a change from his prison pillow, but he accepts the warmth anyways.
It’s not like he had a necessarily bad time in prison. He’s lucky he was placed in a German prison and not an American one, but his genius was suffering. Too little to do for a mind of his capacity.
Steadily, the man drifts off to sleep, his gated thoughts finally allowing themselves to be free, filling his dreams with emotions he hasn’t felt in such a long time. Dreams spun out of a carefully guarded string occupying his mind.
The sound of walking rouses him from his sleep, but he keeps quiet, trying to gather enough information to figure out what to do. “I know you’re awake, Helmut. Your breathing changes once you wake up. Always has, always will”, a familiar voice calls out.
He sits up abruptly and turns towards the voice. There you are, leaning next to the opened window, a cold breeze blowing inside. He shivers, either from the cool air or the feeling that is forming in his stomach.
“Draga, I-“, he begins, but his voice cracks and he stills, not sure if this is real. His eyes take over your figure, a dark stealth suit covering your skin. Your face looks just as he remembered, just older and a little less lifeless. Your arms are crossed, a cold expression on your face.
“So, were you going to tell me you are back or was I just supposed to find out by myself? You didn’t actually plan on keeping your stay here a secret, did you?”, you push yourself off the wall and bend down to the height of Zemo’s face. “Because that would really, really upset me”
Slowly, he moves to take your hands into his own, eyes never leaving yours, “Why are you still here?” You scoff, pulling away from his touch and turning away from him, “You corrupted me. I wouldn’t have survived anywhere else”. Zemo sits up slowly, his eyes never leaving your frame. His feet rest steady on the cheap carpet floor.
“You’re an amazing woman. You’ve survived so much, I doubt anyone could have stopped you”. A dry chuckle escapes your lips as you spin around to face the man, “You don’t get it do you? You’re a mastermind, so intelligent, so bright. And yet, you’re still so clueless” You allow yourself a moment to take him in. He’s beautiful, his face as sharp as ever, his eyes as clear as you remember. You always used to joke that the answer to every question lies in them, but deep down you knew it was true. Your answer was him. Everything you do, you do with him in mind.
“Madripoor is it’s own little world, a planet far away from everywhere else, you know that best. Here, I can pretend. I can pretend that you’re away on a mission, out following the steps to one of your idiotic little plans, anything my mind could come up with.” You glance around the room, suddenly not able to look at him.
“I imagined you drove back to Sokovia and wandered among the hills to find the perfect spot to build a new house. A place with a nice view and lots of sunlight. Big enough to fit us, but just small enough to feel cosy. The perfect home for us”, you continue speaking, a strange sense of irritation rising inside you.
“I even imagined you flew to the moon with fucking Captain America to bring back your own moonstone. But I always knew you’d come back”, your voice begins to waver as you feel your lips start to tremble, ”No matter where I felt you were that day, I knew that I’d see you again”
Your chest feels heavy with pent up emotion, “But out there”, you point towards the open window with your free hand, goosebumps climbing up your body, “out there I knew you were stuck in a little prison cell, all on your own and I knew”, tears well up in your eyes as you feel your throat constricting, “I knew you couldn’t come back and I wouldn’t have survived that”
You close your eyes, the tears falling freely now, streaming down your cheeks in pitiful cascades. Zemo grabs your hand and pulls you towards his body and engulfs you in a big, warm hug. There’s a painful pull in his chest and he can’t stop his own tears from gathering in the pits of eyes. A couple strays escape their confines, a sensation he hasn’t felt in an oh so long time.
“It’s okay”, he whispers with a shaky voice as you sob into his strong frame, “It’s all good, draga, just let it out” His capable hands run over your back as they draw intricate designs into your skin. They’re soothingly familiar, almost like remains of a burnt flower which one used to tend to.
You remain in the man’s arms as you both relieve the suppressed emotions of the years you had to live apart. Pain. Anger. Fear. Anxiety. All the sleepless nights and restless days. All the days that turned into weeks, then months and years that were wasted. The yearning, the longing and the lust.
Your cheeks are blotchy and your nose runny when you’ve calmed down. Gently, you look into Zemo’s face to see him in a similar position to yours. “I missed you so much”, a quiet mumble, barely noticeable. He smiles softly, “I missed you too, draga” Tenderly, you reach up to his face and wipe away his tears, replacing them with loving, light kisses.
“I was so scared that I’d never see you again”, you cry, vision blurring. “I’m so sorry, mein Engel, I promise I’ll never leave again” He lets his thumb stroke over your cheek, the contact filling you with warmth. You nuzzle further into his palm, almost purring at the feeling. “You’re even more beautiful than I remembered”, his clear eyes roam over your face. A small smile dances over your lips, “You’re just as handsome as when I first met you”. He smiles, slowly coming closer to your face, his breath fanning against your skin, “I love you, draga”
Heat spreads through your body at his words, your heart beginning to beat faster, “ I love you too, Helmut” There’s an electricity filled silence as you stare into his reddened eyes. Cautiously, he moves forward, gaze focusing on your lips, “May I kiss you?” You nod in response, “Please”
Nothing could have prepared you for how amazing it would feel to have his mouth on yours after all these years. The kiss is sloppy and salty from the tears intermixing. He puts all of his emotion into it, you feel his pain, his anger, his desperation, but most of all his love. You put the same vigour into it, showing him how strongly you feel.
A sudden need floods your veins as his tongue runs over your lower lip. You allow him entrance and he begins to trace your insides, gentle, yet powerful. It feels like he is reclaiming what has always been his, a relentless roaming to make sure he is still familiar with your body. Your tongue tangled with his in a greedy dance, desperation seeping through.
His hands travel up your thighs, roughly squeezing the covered skin. One comes to rest on your ass, using his safe grip to pull you against him. The feel of you in his own grasp is satisfying him, to know that you’re still his. His other hand travels up further until it reaches your neck and applies a delicious pressure.
The gesture makes you sink back into a state of calmness you haven’t felt since Zemo left. Now that he’s back and survival isn’t in the front of your mind anymore, you allow yourself to be fully consumed by it.
“Do you remember your colours?”, he asks, breath heavy against your mouth. You feel his desire against your thigh, your mind immediately becoming more and more clouded. “Yes, sir”, you mumble, surging forward to feel his lips again. He allows your forwardness, but tightens his grip around your throat, “Behave”, he whispers against your mouth.
After a second, he draws back, his eyes serious, “Tell me your colours again, draga, tell me what they mean” His gaze is intense and you struggle to hold eye contact. “Green is good”, you mumble. His hands follow the line of your body until they reach your waist where he gently caresses you. “Yellow means slow down. I need a break” He smiles, his fingertips gently pressing into your skin, “That’s right baby you’re doing so well” A whimper escapes your lips, his praise fills you with a sense of comfort, a much needed luxury that you had missed out on for years. “Red is stop, it’s too much, I don’t like what’s happening” Helmut presses a few kisses along your jaw and hums in appreciation.
“Well done, I’m so proud of you, mein Engel”, the words hug you like a blanket that pulls you deeper into that warm mindspace. Your every thought and feeling is dedicated to please, make Zemo proud, satisfy him. Need tugs at your insides and you let your head fall down, gaze trained onto your partner’s strong thighs. His warm hands trail up your body and to the zipper of your suit, “I’m going to unzip you, but I’m not going to fuck you tonight”, he hums, voice gentle.
A whimper of weak protest escapes your lips, but you don’t move to disobey him. Helmut chuckles and mouths along your neck, “don’t worry draga, I’ll still make you cum” His strong fingers play with the zipper before you feel a gentle tug and cool air against your exposed skin. “You’re not wearing a bra”, Zemo states, voice breathy. “Didn’t like the lines it left”, you answer, moaning once his hands grab at your breasts. He pinches your nipples, careful to not overstimulate you, but make you feel his want. One hand moves to unzip you fully, tracing the freshly exposed skin with his thumb.
“So beautiful”, he whispers into your ear and slides his fingers down into your suit. You watch the digits disappear and moan as he slowly circles around your most sensitive parts. You know that you’re wet already, it’s been years, not only for him, but you weren’t ready for his reaction. Helmut groans when his fingers dance over your opening and feels your arousal covering him. His hips thrust up with desire and you whine, wanting to feel him against your skin.
“Fuck, I’ll make you grind on my dick, make you cover me in your wetness and you’ll cum all over me, won’t you?”, he growls as you nod, “Yes sir, whatever you want, I’ll be your good girl, I promise” Your mouths collide and Helmut completely ravishes you, tongue dominating against yours. “Come on, draga, help me unbutton my trousers, I know you want it so badly”, his breath mingles with yours as a moan leaves you, so turned on by his words.
Trembling fingers reach down to the tenting bulge and you can’t help but press against it. Zemo moans and reaches down to your ass to push you further into him, “Come on, mein Engel, don’t tease” Careful, but eager, you pop the button and pull down your lover’s zip exposing the tight grey boxer briefs he is wearing. A slight wet patch catches your attention and you grind yourself down onto his cock. “Missed this so much”, you breathe out before you reach inside of the underwear and wrap your hand around him, “May I?”
Helmut nods, eyes trained onto your face with a smile, “Go on, draga”
You take a deep breath, willing yourself to remember the way Zemo likes to be pleasured. It comes to you naturally, muscle memory joining your eagerness to make Helmut feel as good as he makes you feel. Slowly, you draw your hand up his length, twisting your wrist at the head, before pushing down to his base. His breath hitches when you begin to simulate a pulsing motion similar to how your pussy is fluttering.
You fall into a familiar rhythm, desperate to make the man underneath you burst, gentle fingers paying special attention to his most sensitive parts. A wave of desire washes over you and you lean forwards to kiss Helmut again, never stopping your hand’s motions.
The kiss lasts long, filled with a hungry devotion to the other person. It feels good and that’s all you need at the moment. “I’ve never stopped loving you”, Zemo whispers once you break the kiss, desperate for air, “You’re the only one I want. That will never change” He looks into your eyes, making sure that the weight of his words registers with you. Your heart beats faster and tears rise in your eyes once more, “I love you too” A heavy, but comfortable silence lays over you both. Only heavy breathing and a few scarce gasps can be heard “I haven’t slept with anyone else”, you mumble, slowing down your wrist.
A surprised look washes over Helmut’s face, just for a second, before he cups your face with two hands. “You didn’t have to do that. I wouldn’t have been upset”, sincerity is lacing his voice. You reach up and place your hands over his wrists. “I know. I tried once, with a woman. I kissed her, but it felt wrong. You were all I could think of”
“Draga…”, he drifts off, not knowing what to say. All of a sudden, you feel him throb against your chore and your abs tighten with want. “Please, make me cum, I’ve been waiting for you so long”, you whine, need taking over. Zemo lets out a breath and nods, “Yeah, you’re right, you’re right. Your colour?”.
“Green”, you whimper, “So green” Quickly, Helmut takes his cock out of its confines and pushes himself into the tight space between your suit and your pussy. His entire length slides along your heat and rubs deliciously against your clit. “You think you can come just from this?”, he asks, shuddering from the pressure against him, “Slide over my cock until you can’t stop yourself?”
A moan escapes your lips and you begin to roll your hips against the baron’s pulsing dick. One of the man’s hands returns to rest on your ass, the other one pulling you close by your neck into a bruising kiss. With every wet slide, every push against him, you feel yourself edging closer and closer to the sweet release. Being so close to the man you love feels so good, especially after all the years spent yearning for this exact moment.
Zemo begins to thrust upwards against your heat, animalistic groans and whines leaving his mouth. He’s been deprived of touch for so long, he knows he isn’t going to last for much longer, but he’s determined to get you off before he allows himself to be engulfed by the pleasure he’s desiring so much. The hand on your behind pushes you over him even harder, knowingly angling your body to stimulate you best. His other hand roams all over your free skin, squeezing your breasts and playing with your nipples.
You feel your legs begin to shake, the pleasure beginning to take control over your body. Desperately you grip onto Zemo’s shoulders for leverage, allowing him to use your body as he desires to. Moans and harsh breaths, wet sounds and the smell of sweat fills the room as the two of you strain to reach the needed high.
“You’re doing so good for me, draga, I'm so proud of you”, he breathes into your ear and nibbles along your jaw. When he finds a spot he likes, the baron bites down, readily sucking on your skin to mark you up. The act fills you with a new electricity and you throw your head back, wanton moans escaping your chest, “Fuck, it feels so good, please let me cum, please”, you cry out, tears gathering in your eyes.
Zemo fucks up even harder, sweat glistening on his forehead, glueing teh fallen tsrands of hair to his face. He looks delicious. “Come on, mein Engel, you waited so long”, he grunts, balls flexing, “Show me how good you are and cum” With one last hard thrust the band snaps and you give yourself into the pleasure, moaning his name as the shocks of cumming from another person’s touch course through your body in waves.
Your hips move on their own, pussy clenching around nothing, when Zemo groans. His hips thrusts against you erratically as he shoots his seed into your suit, groaning with relief. Shakily as if electrocuted, you ride out your high, slowly coming down. Helmut’s hands roam along your back, gently calming you down. It takes a few moments until the words he’s mumbling into your ear form coherent sentences.
“You did so well, mein Engel, I’m so proud of you. Such a good girl for me, so perfect”, his voice is soft and full of love and it makes you smile. You nuzzle your face deep into Zemo’s neck to breathe in his sex ridden scent that mixed up with the undertones of his natural smell. After a while, you find the power to speak again, “You still smell the same”
This causes the man to chuckle and press a kiss into your hair. A warm silence settles around you where you just take in Helmut’s presence and remain in this blissful postorgasmic state. Soon enough, you realise the burn in your thighs and the uncomfortable itch of drying cum against your skin and shudder. “Do you have something to get cleaned up?”
You move off of the man’s lap and peel the skin tight suit off of your body while Zemo wets a towel in the small bathroom next door. When he returns, he is dressed in a fresh pair of boxer briefs and a snug t-shirt. He carries another shirt over his arm and hands it to you. “Thank you”, you mouth with an appreciative smile and close the window so that only a small opening remains.
Helmut kneels in front of you with the towel in his hand. “May I?”, he asks and motions towards your core. You nod and watch as the man carefully cleans his seed off of your skin. You revel in the attention and sit down on the baron’s bed once he is done. Zemo pulls you down with him so that your body is fitted snugly against his chest, his strong arms keeping you safe.
“So”, you begin, “You’re with Barnes and Wilson now?” An unpleasant sound leaves Helmut’s mouth, but he nods, “It seems like we are following the same goal for the time being” You raise an eyebrow, urging him to continue. He sighs, but obeys, not before gently stroking his thumb along your cheek, “Somebody is distributing a super soldier serum. We’re trying to find that person and eliminate all the remaining serums”
“Let me help”, you urge, hands against his clothed chest, “I know Madripoor better than you, it has changed during the power broker’s reign. I’ll do whatever you need me to”
Zemo chuckles, his eyes shining, “Whatever makes you happy, draga. I’ll fill you in on the details in the morning” You press a gentle kiss onto your partner’s lips and smile, “That was surprisingly easy” He grins, “It’s not like I could ever change your mind. I’d rather have you with me than in the shadows on your own” His seemingly never ending warmth envelops you and a yawn escapes your mouth. Zemo chuckles and grabs your hand, his fingers circling the singular ring that’s adorning your ring finger. “I can’ believe you kept this”, he whispers. You grin mischievously and lace your fingers with his own, “You promised you’d make me your wife, I’m not letting that go. Even when the days were hard, it would ground me, knowing that my fiance was still out there doing whatever my mind came up with that day”
“Once this is over”, Helmut says, his voice laced with meaning. “I’ll never let go of you again, draga. You’re mine. Always and forever”
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