Also also- pointing out a stereotype and how it can be harmful doesn't mean that the real existing people who fit that mold are also harmful.
Listen idk about you but I sure do like the taste of watermelon, lemonade, fried chicken, and soul food. I got big lips and a big nose and a big ass and I even used to have big boobs before I chopped them shits off. I can play basketball and I used to run track. I sure do use AAVE when speaking with other black folks and also I like seasoning on my food and specifically I like my food hot and spicy and full of salt and butter. I like my music to have a good beat and I like to listen to it loud. I dropped out of college so I guess I don't count as college educated and I sure am poor as shit and even used to live off food stamps and even still I qualify for government subsidies. I was on that Obamacare getting free healthcare for a year too!
And you know what? Each of those is still used as a harmful stereotype, but it is not harmful for me, as a person, to exist. When it is used to harm, it is used as proof of inferiority and to incite derision. There is no harm in someone of my skin color enjoying the taste of fried chicken and the sound of the drums. I am not hurting anyone by existing as me. But people will use that existence to harm others, and that's where the stereotype becomes harmful.
Pointing out that people tend to stereotype trans men as exclusive bottoms (and trans women as exclusive tops!) only capable of having PIV sex does not mean that if you specifically fit that mold that you are bad. It means that people from outside of the community use this to harm others, and as evidence that someone is inferior. You are not bad for being who you are. It is those who use your existence as a weapon who are harmful.
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