Cindlemain's Home

Well hello there and welcome to my little world. Please excuse the mess as I am not great at tagging and love to hang out in multiple fandoms. Here you will trip over Dragon Age, Team Fortress 2, Doctor Who, CyberPunk 2077, Marvel in general, some DC, Lord of the Rings, Arcane and anything else that catches my attention or looks funny. Enjoy.

[mythals-whore]

If i had the power to draw i would draw Davrin in regency wear with his fancy tie undone and his shirt all unlaced/unbuttoned okay bye

[cute-ellyna]

He just pretends to be thoughtful. He knows you're watching.

[mythals-whore]

This is beautiful and wonderful and MY MUTUALS ARE THE BEST MUTUALS. I am obsessed with this i can’t stop looking at it i gotta go chew on it for a while

[thecaffeinebookwarrior-deactiva]

How To Write A Kiss Scene:  An Illustrated Guide

Anonymous Asked:

Can you maybe do a post on the elements of a kiss scene? 

Certainly, and I’m sorry it took so long – I have several post requests I’m working on, and thankfully, I finally have a bit of spare time to answer them. 

If you’d like my tips on how to write a healthy romance, or how to write a killer sex scene, go right ahead and click the links here.

For the time being, here goes!

1.  Keep things understated (especially in regards to tongues.)  

“Our tongues tangled and went to war in our locked mouths, battling madly for dominance.”

No.  Okay?  Just no.  The thought of my tongue “tangling” with someone else’s is an image I would really prefer to unsee, yet I have seen it and countless variants in both published literature and fics.  

Similarly, ask anyone whose ever had an unsolicited tongue jammed down their throat:  it’s not pleasant, and readers shouldn’t be lead to believe it is.  

My advice with kissing scenes is to focus predominantly on lips, and maybe add a little tongue as an afterthought.  Like so:

“His lips were warm and soft.  They parted slightly, allowing my tongue to slip inside.”

If you want something a bit more passionate:

“Our bodies pressed together heatedly against the wall, breathing heavily as our lips pressed together.  I could taste our shared breath, feel the thud of our combined heartbeat as we fumbled to take off one another’s clothes.”  

You could even try, “His tongue pressed between parted lips in ticklish kitten licks,” which, granted, sounds a little awkward without context, but isn’t nearly as wince-worthy as the image of it being jammed in like a tongue depressor.

Literally and metaphorically, tone down the tongue.

2.  Don’t get overly floral about taste.

“Her lips tasted like peaches and honey.”

No, they didn’t.  And her pussy didn’t taste like coconut cream pie, either, or anything else your quintessential sub par male author or pre-teen smut writer might dream up.  

Unless she’s literally just been eating peaches and honey, or she’s using some kind of fancy lubricant, her lips are going to taste like lips, and her pussy is going to taste like pussy.  Full stop.

Granted, that isn’t very romantic, which is why I like to focus on other sensations besides taste.  For example:

“Her lips were soft, almost silken, and pillowy against my own.  I could feel the soft tickle of her breath beneath my nose, fingers carding through her hair as we breathed each other in.”

I occasionally actually will have my characters be eating or drinking something before hand, also, just to add an extra layer of sensation play to the scene.

For example:

“His lips were still sweet with milk and honey from his afternoon tea as Alexander kissed his husband goodbye.”

But my advice is keep these instances short and sweet:  nothing can kill the mood like a good dose of purple prose.

3.  Focus on how the characters are feeling.

Here’s the thing: as I understand it, kissing someone you’re not all that into at the moment is awkward.  

You don’t know what to do with your hands, your hyper aware of everything your body is doing, and you’re really concerned with how you might taste.  You’re also a lot more prone to noticing unseemly things about your partner, like bad morning breath, bad skin, weird grunting breathing, et cetera.

The same goes for writing:  too much physicality can make a kissing scene feel painfully awkward, whereas, just as in real life, a good kiss will be one in which the best part is how your partner makes you feel.

Focus on how your POV character is feeling, and add physical details here and there to make the scene feel grounded:

“Warmth blossomed in Luna’s chest, sparks igniting as Artemis leaned in close, lips brushing together, tentatively, for the first time.  The smell of her perfume, of the soft, peachy scent of her conditioner, was dizzying, butterflies dancing in her stomach.  But warmth consumed her as she leaned into the kiss, Arty’s lips impossibly soft against her own.”

I find this approach much more effective than describing each motion in painstaking detail.

Bonus:  Learn from the masters.

I don’t claim to be the paramount expert on writing, kissing, or any combination of the two.  

So without further ado, here are what are considered to be some of literature’s finest makeout scenes for your benefit and inspiration:  

“It was like that. Almost the last thing I remember was standing with Daisy and watching the moving-picture director and his Star. They were still under the white-plum tree and their faces were touching except for a pale, thin ray of moonlight between. It occurred to me that he had been very slowly bending toward her all evening to attain this proximity, and even while I watched I saw him stoop one ultimate degree and kiss at her cheek.”

- F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby    

“I turned around and found her face, and her mouth was already waiting like a question. I’m not gonna make it out to be something that it wasn’t: It was perfect—Coley’s soft lips against the bite of the liquor and sugary Coke still on our tongues. She did more than just not stop me. She kissed me back.”

-  Emily M. Danforth, The Miseducation of Cameron Post

“She drew him toward her with her eyes, he inclined his face toward hers and lay his mouth on her mouth, which was like a freshly split-open fig. For a long time he kissed Kamala, and Siddhartha was filled with deep astonishment as she taught him how wise she was, how she ruled him, put him off, lured him back… each one different from the other, still awaiting him. Breathing deeply, he remained standing and at this moment he was like a child astonished by the abundance of knowledge and things worth learning opening up before his eyes.”

- Hermanne Hesse, Siddhartha 

“Cath closed the book and let it fall on Levi’s chest, not sure what happened next. Not sure she was awake, all things considered.The moment it fell he pulled her into him. Onto him. With both arms. Her chest pressed against his, and the paperback slid between their stomachs.

Cath’s eyes were half closed, and so were Levi’s and his lips only looked small from afar, she realized, because of their doll-like pucker. They were perfectly big, really, now that she had a good look at them. Perfectly something. He nudged his nose against hers, and their mouths fell sleepily together, already soft and open. When Cath’s eyes closed, her eyelids stuck. She wanted to open them. She wanted to get a better look at Levi’s too-dark eyebrows, she wanted to admire his crazy, vampire hairline—she had a feeling this was never going to happen again and that it might even ruin what was left of her life, so she wanted to open her eyes and bear some witness.

But she was so tired. And his mouth was so soft.And nobody had ever kissed Cath like this before. Only Abel had kissed her before, and that was like getting pushed squarely on the mouth and pushing back.

Levi’s kisses were all taking. Like he was drawing something out of her with soft little jabs of his chin. She brought her fingers up to his hair, and she couldn’t open her eyes.”

-Rainbow Rowell, Fangirl  

ROMEO

If I profane with my unworthiest hand This holy shrine, the gentle fine is this: My lips, two blushing pilgrims, ready stand To smooth that rough touch with a tender kiss.

JULIET Good pilgrim, you do wrong your hand too much, Which mannerly devotion shows in this; For saints have hands that pilgrims’ hands do touch, And palm to palm is holy palmers’ kiss.

ROMEO Have not saints lips, and holy palmers too?

JULIET Ay, pilgrim, lips that they must use in prayer.

ROMEO O, then, dear saint, let lips do what hands do; They pray, grant thou, lest faith turn to despair.

JULIET Saints do not move, though grant for prayers’ sake.

ROMEO Then move not, while my prayer’s effect I take. Thus from my lips, by yours, my sin is purged.

JULIET Then have my lips the sin that they have took.

ROMEO Sin from thy lips? O trespass sweetly urged! Give me my sin again.

JULIET You kiss by the book.

- William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet

I hope this helps, and happy writing!  <3

[magerightsmagefights]

Thinking about how Illario expects his cousin to be the silent, brooding killer. About how Lucanis has never had a serious friendship outside House Dellamorte, and he's also just spent a year imprisoned, so of course Illario would assume Lucanis is still unsociable and awkward. He's always been that way. Thinking about what if Illario asks the other companions about Lucanis when they stop by the Cantori Diamond, and has to do a double take when someone says, "Oh yeah, Lucanis is hilarious. Always has something funny to say."

And Illario is like??? Lucanis? My cousin Lucanis? Is making people laugh? On purpose?

Bellara goes on a tangent about the book she's reading, and how Lucanis had such a good interpretation of the villain's motivations and it made the ending so much sadder! She's never been in a book club before, she's so happy Lucanis suggested it.

And Illario quietly mouths the words "book club" to himself because, aside from contracts, when has Lucanis ever joined any kind of club?

Of course Taash thinks Lucanis is just the coolest. Antivan Crows are already pretty cool, but a Crow with wings? Who's teaching her how to say good one-liners? Fuck yeah, Lucanis is awesome!

Then if an unromanced Emmerich starts dating Strife, he nearly gives Illario whiplash with the comment "Lucanis gives excellent romantic advice, especially with gifts." Because surely we can't be talking about the same Lucanis. The same Lucanis who has never been in a relationship, and the one (1) time he tried to flirt with Viago -- by *sending a gift* specifically -- Viago either ignored it or took it as a threat. Did the demon do this? Can demons make their hosts charismatic?

Davrin calls Lucanis a "fun drinking buddy." Harding appreciates how concerned Lucanis is that she's being fairly compensated for her services. Offers to lend her his contract negotiator, show her what other people are charging for the same services, he's really so sweet.

And a romanced Rook. Most people make insanely hot Rooks, so Illario watches, completely baffled, as Lucanis manages to pull that. Or if not that, Neve Gallus. Just. how?? Lucanis made one step out of the Ossuary and fell into a Pit Of Friends. All it took was like one month away from Caterina's influence (and the prison) to turn Lucanis into a guy everyone likes being around. How did this happen. When. How the hell is Illario suppose to defeat his cousin if his cousin is armed with the power of friendship? (He can't. Illario is very much defeated by Lucanis' power of friendship.)

[thedissonantverses]

“This game has too many lore inconsistencies and plot holes.”

Nah see sometimes world states change and that’s a good thing for world-building and not actually an inconsistency or a plot hole you just missed a bunch of stuff. You might be more comfortable with Origins. A lot of people still think it’s the best one for some reason.

“There’s not enough religion.”

Good. We had three games of this. We’re in an entirely new part of the world. Go play Inquisition. You, get this, lead an Inquisition. Never in my life have I thought “You know what this situation needs? More Catholicism!”

“The romances are boring/bad.”

No. The game just doesn’t treat them like the most important part of the story cause it’s not. Go play a different developer’s games for that. There’s a full scope of humanity to explore beyond romance.

“The dialogue is bad.”

Tourist. I was there for “Hawke stepped in the poopy.” I have a tattoo of “swooping is bad” covering most of my back. Well, shit if you wanna miserably side by side the bad dialogue from each game be my guest. There’s a hell of a lot of great dialogue in Veilguard too.

“The elves aren’t acting elfy enough.”

…Kay no you’re done with video games. I know the made up language is neat but you need to stop. The lore and the writers don’t treat races like monolithic cultures so why do you?

Lo siento, I meant “fuck off shem.” Grrrr I’m an elf. This is what elves do.

“Rook is a bad p-”

Oh for fuck’s sake just go play Inquisition again.

[mythalsknickers]

Post DA Day Thoughts and Predictions

Genuinely I remember back in Trespasser's post released Dev Cycle, we learned very quickly not to trust a word out of Epler's mouth. Does anyone remember the days of "The Romance end of Trespasser will be closure for Solavellans" Pepperidge Farms Remembers.

That being said some amazing things came out of DA Day, for starters my Hawke looking stunning. But also Mary Kirby seeing and creating representation for Demisexual Panromantic people like myself. Rookanis and Spookanis (fuck you epler) will be my new Solavellan temple. So what are my thoughts going forward into potentially a DA5? This will likely be edited or linked to edits as more information in the dev cycle comes out.

The Executors are going to some kind of bad, I don't necessarily know if they will be THE big bad right away, but they are something that terrifies Solas.

We have not seen the last of the Lighthouse or the Caretaker

Which likely means we are not done with Rook, I have said from the beginning Rook's story is unfinished. They were a field commander promotion and the next game is going to be them earning their leadership. Veilguard feels entirely to much like ME1 narratively in terms of what it suffers from. Which is being the first in a franchise.

The Blight has Fundamentally changed which may present for an easier time curing it other then pregnancy with magic dragon baby

We will see more of Kal-Sharok, and we likely are not going to the south any time soon. That is a hard pill to swallow, we spent almost two decades in the south, but I knew five years ago, for us to only focus on the north the South would have to be up-ended.

I do not think we have fundamentally seen the last of Mythal even though the evanuris as we know them are dead or worse. Mythal fragmented herself alot, and there is no saying which fragment Solas killed. By my reckoning the Kirkwall (if you left her alive in origins) fragment is unaccounted for and it seems to be a direction Bioware could head.

My hope is that as the series continues with Rook and crew we get more involved romance scenes similarly to what was done with ME's Trilogy.

At Some point we will see Par Vollen and we will have more depth to the mage traditions of norther thedas.

[evanhereonearth]

Solas, outnumbered seven to one, overpowered by a lot more than that, betrayed by his best friend Mythal who bound him to her service and coerced him into leaving the Fade and coerced him into making a weapon that would make an entire people tranquil to stop the war she started AND ignored him when he said it would create *checks notes* a blight and made him do it anyway. Solas, facing seven blighted wannabe gods who turned on his best abusive friend Mythal when she finally stood up to them after CENTURIES of him begging her to do just that and starting a rebellion to free all their multitudes of slaves: *creates the veil, imprisons the blight and the Evanuris, and preserves all life in Thedas* World: FUCK THE DREAD WOLF, GOD OF TREACHERY AND LIES *worships the Evanuris and their dragon thralls*

Solas: zzzzzzzzzz (knocked out cold from saving the world for LITERALLY SEVERAL MILLENNIA MORE)

Tevinter: *razes what's left of Elvhenan, steals all their magic, enslaves the elven people for entire length of Solas's world-saving-induced coma*

Also Tevinter: *breaks into the fucking black city and brings out the blight*

Also also Tevinter: *uses so much blood magic that the veil ends up in tatters*

The Blight: >:)

World: fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck *throws everything they can at the blight, including--*checks notes again*--the blight

Orlais: you know what sucks? elves. let's kill them all

Ferelden: good shout, mes amis

Orlais: you know what also sucks? mages. put them in prisons.

Ferelden: you're full of good ideas when you're not invading us

Free Marches: MAGE PRISON, YOU SAY?

Orlais: add templars who can decide to murder them or make them tranquil on a whim at any moment

Ferelden and Free Marches: *frantically taking notes*

Rivain and Nevarra: we're just going to be...over here...

Blights 1-5: i've got a great idea i've got a great idea

Blights 1-5 after a while: my great idea didn't work :(

Archdemons 1-5: ....... :(

Evanuris 1-5: ......... :(

Solas, waking up in 9:40ish Dragon: what the...WHAT THE EVERLOVING FUCKING FUCK. they can just KILL MAGE CHILDREN? AND PURGE ALIENAGES? AND ALMOST EVERY ELF IN TEVINTER IS A SLAVE? *absolutely rabid, seeks out the Dalish, as remnants of his people*

The Dalish, at Solas: *ARROWS*

Solas: ......fuck this shit, fuck all of this shit, fuck these tyrants in particular, fuck this fucking...UGH

The veil, after all this: (o.O:0oO.)

The remaining blighted Evanuris and the 99% of blight that did not escape: :)

Solas: well, that is a problem, going to need to address that ASAP, but turns out millennia of coma doesn't leave a spirit spry

Corypheus, busting out of warden jail: I AM FREE

Solas: hm, could kill that guy letting him unlock my orb, since he broke into my blight prison in the first place and defo deserves dying

Corypheus: veil needs a certain je ne sais quoi, a...bigger hole. i will make one.

Wardens: yes, good plan, blighted magister man. we are in control of the blight inside us and also heroes *in death, sacrifice = divine justinia's ritual sacrifice under thrall*

The veil:

O

Corypheus: >:( but like...not dead

Solas: well, i did not see that coming

Lavellan: *in chains, threatened with execution*

humans: KNIFE EAR >:(

Lavellan: *hole in the sky, hole in her memories, hole in her fucking hand* fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck, wait, this hole in my hand helps close holes in the SKY

Solas: *.* It seems you hold the key to our salvation

Lavellan: i'm sorry what

the human Chantry: HERALD OF ANDRASTE!!!!!!!! *falls to knees*

Lavellan: I'M SORRY WHAT

Cassandra: time for you to decide the fate of the world

Lavellan: I'M. SORRY. WHAT???????? you know what? fine. *stops alexius from blood magicking his way through redcliffe and time itself, gets punted into a hellscape of nightmares and makes it back with the help of a rebel tevinter mage* the mages i rescued from becoming probable slaves to tevinter are our allies and dorian is my new best friend for being the only reason i made it back alive and the whole world didn't die *dabs*

Cassandra: >:(

Mother Giselle: >:(

Lavellan: ffs

Corypheus: *dragon temper tantrum*

Lavellan: *somehow escapes both dragon and Corypheus, trudges through blizzard, collapses*

Mother Giselle: *.* I FEEL A SONG COMING ON

Literally everyone but Solas: *falls to their knees*

Solas: a word?

Lavellan: OH THANK HEAVENS

Solas: these people are wack and aren't going to like that Corypheus is using elven magic *cough*, they're a hairsbreadth from executing us at all moments lol, btw here's a castle, you know, for you cos i highkey see myself in you and god i'm so fucking lonely

Lavellan: me too but wait, what the fuck is happening. you know what? fuck it. solas, what if we kissed,,, in the fade

Solas: what IF we kissed,,, in the fade *fade tongue*

Solas: ...you continue to surprise me. you show a wisdom i have not seen...since my deepest journeys into the fade!

Lavellan: don't you dare walk away from me now

Solas: okay vhenan i stay

Vivienne: this is a DEMON and NOT A PET

Lavellan: *blinks* right, no, this spirit kid who is the literal only reason we escaped Haven alive is my son now. if he hadn't read roderick's mind we'd all be avalanched or blighted dragoned, so SUCK IT UP

Vivienne: >:(

Cassandra: >:(

Sera: >:(

Solas: :D

Wardens: btw we're doing blood magic and raising an army of demons. not really our fault but also not NOT our fault? idk, blight in the blood, morally grey area. get it? grey...war--never mind, we'll be at adamant xoxo

Cullen: lotsa soldiers gonna die

Lavellan: fuck, is there another choice?

Advisors: ...no

Cory's dragon: *burninating the adamant, burninating the wardens, burninating all the people and this crumbling ROCKY BRIIIIIIDGE! CRUMBLING ROCKY BRIDGEEEEE*

Lavellan, flying through the air hundreds of feet towards the ground: fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck *opens a rift into the fade*

Everyone but Solas: FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK WE'RE IN THE FADE

Solas: we're in the FADE!!!!!

Lavellan, after escaping the nightmare's lair: glad half the team is pissed at me, what's next, an imperial ball? how hard can that be?

Orlesians: they invited an ELF SAVAGE >:(

Lavellan: you know what, fuck this and fuck Celene for genociding the entire Halamshiral alienage and fuck you, Gaspard, you can be Briala's little French Orlesian bulldog

Half the Inquisition: *shocked pikachu*

Morrigan: allow me to shemsplain all of elven history to everyone, including Solas, yourself, and all the ancient elves in this temple

Lavellan: you know what? okay. *rubs at Mythal's vallaslin, makes eyes real big* who is this "Mythal"

Solas: *choking in the corner*

Cassandra, muttering: i do not want to do a ritual to a false god

Morrigan: lemme have the well, lemme have it, i deserve it more than you

Lavellan: ...abso-fucking-lutely not *drinks from the well out of pure spite*

Solas: WHAT HAVE YOU DONE, VHENAN

Lavellan: idk vhenan, this world sucks and i wanna make it better and i love you

Solas: ...you are everything and you inspire me, hurry, i need to tell you i'm the dread wolf but am going to break up with you and remove your slave markings instead and btw they're basically a drawing of me in my true form and honestly, this whole thing is real fucked up and you're the only real person in my entire life who sees me

Lavellan: wait what

Solas: i'm bad and don't deserve you and had to harden my heart to save the world before and everyone hated me for it so i'm projecting when i say you must harden your heart to a cutting edge to kill Corypheus, I'll explain after we kill him

Lavellan: ...oh yeah guess we should do that but I gotta go meet Mythal first

Solas: wait what

Mythal: *is Morrigan's mum, is only mostly dead, also 100% cool with overriding her servants' will entirely for shits and giggles, 0/10 do not trust* i'll help you if you fight this dragon lol

Morrigan: *choking in the corner*

Corypheus: *has a mahoosive temper tantrum when Mythal's pet dragon kills his pet dragon, dies*

Solas: ;-; ilu, inky, what we had was real but i'm afraid to do to you what Mythal did to me. I MUST AWAY

Lavellan: ....

World: HERALD OF ANDRASTE!!!!!!!!!!!!*

*some restrictions may apply, like in a couple years we're going to forget everything you did and be real mad at you

Solas, somewhere: been there, vhenan

World, two years later: :D we're here to hate you, right on schedule

Qunari: you are in need of the gentle path. therefore, we are coming to kill you all

Solas: like hell you will. but come to think of it, this is a good excuse to see vhenan again

Lavellan's arm: TIME TO DIE

Solas: defo another good excuse to see vhenan again. probs should study that arm anyway

Lavellan, after several Qunari too many: CAN ANYTHING IN THIS FUCKING WORLD STAY FIXED

Inquisition, including Divine Victoria: *shocked pikachu*

Lavellan: i'm going back through the fucking looking glass to talk to some ancient elven sentinels with Mythal's magic whisper well, they're the only fucking thing that makes sense here

Qunari: *destroying everything in sight but getting hounded by the dread wolf at every step*

Lavellan, whose arm is trying to kill her but is following Qunari through her own people's magic mirror world: ...i think i'm in love with the dread wolf

Companions: pfffffft

Cole: :D YES, YOU ARE AND HE LOVES YOU TOO

Lavellan: thank god i have you, cole, my spirit son

Solas, in a statuary garden of petrified Qunari: i suspect you have questions

Lavellan: honestly, fen'harel, not really

Solas: *shocked pikachu* well done

Lavellan: i'm real tired and you could have just trusted me back in Crestwood.

Solas: this world is broken, i must tear down the veil

Lavellan: yep, i'm one "knife ear" away from putting a knife in the next human's ear who says it tbh, i'd rather live in the fade with you and my spirit son, can i help you pls vhenan

Solas: ...no

Lavellan: wtf

Solas, internally panicking because he followed Mythal wherever she went and she dragged him to literal hell and trauma and now his one true love is offering to follow him while he probably makes things worse again: absolutely not, no, but i love you forever

Lavellan's arm: >:(

Solas: ...right, i gotta take that

Lavellan: wait what

Solas: i will never forget you *trundles through mirror with severed arm*

Lavellan: oh fuck my entire life, you know what, Ferelden and Orlais? Inquisition is no more, i'm going on sabbatical to Stone Bear Hold where at least people are not insane and Storvacker loves me, and then i'm going home to the castle vhenan gave me. don't call me. byeeee

ten years later

Varric: gonna go stop Solas, who invented the veil and is From Fade, from doing things i don't understand, wish me luck, inky

Lavellan: WAIT ONE GODDAMNED SECOND I'M COMING WITH YOU

Varric: no <3 i found a complete rando who will fuck everything up

Rook: hey, what if i drop a statue on this nuclear arsenal protecting the biggest biological weapon of mass destruction known to all of thedas? that'll help

Neve, a literal mage who should know even small rituals can blow up and kill you: probs not a good idea but Varric, a dwarf who knows nothing about magic or the veil or the Fade whatsoever says this ritual must be stopped At All Costs By Any Means Necessary so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Varric: Solas I will shoot you with Bianca

Solas: ffs stop *breaks Bianca*

Varric: can you promise me your way is better

Solas: i know way better than to make promises like that, have you seen this world???

Varric: GOTCHA, YOU LYING LIAR WHO LIES

Rook: TIIIIIIIIIIIIIMBERRRRRRR

Varric: defo going to attack the guy whose millennia of existence has been centred on this massive magical problem i do not even comprehend a little after waiting ten years to ask a single question about it when he'd already got going *tries to stab Solas*

Solas, feeling everything he's spent all of world history protecting the world from breaking out of jail: turns the dagger and stabs Varric instead

Elgar'nan: >:)

Ghilan'nain: >:)

Solas: oh for fucking FUCK'S SA--*exit, stage Fade Jail*

Blight: >:)

Rook: oops

Neve and Harding: omg this could not possibly be our fault at all, not even a little. it's Solas's fault, the lying liar who lies

Lavellan: i will not murder this stupid child, i will not murder this stupid child, i will not murder this stupid child

Morrigan: we have to help the stupid child

Lavellan: we have to help the stupid child

Morrigan and Lavellan: *look at each other*

Lavellan: when this is over, i stg--

Morrigan, who has millennia of memories of Mythal abusing Solas and decades of Flemythal abusing her: yeah no i will throw you a going away party and take care of Dorian for you and help you get your boyfriend back and no way will i fight him, this is actually ridiculous

Ferelden, Orlais, and the Free Marches, all of whom turned on Lavellan ten years ago: hELP help HELP there's BLIIIIIGHT

Lavellan to Leliana: you owe me a hundred gold

Leliana: *hands over a solid gold nug*

Ferelden: X_X

Orlais: X_X

Free Marches: X_X

Lavellan: *grits teeth* i better go meet with rook

Rook: andaran atish'an, honoured inquisitor

Lavellan: yo. sure would be nice to be meeting without our gods, you know, destroying absolutely everything i've spent a quarter of my life protecting and rebuilding after the last apocalypse but here we are i guess

Morrigan: *smirks at shade*

Northern Thedas: ROOK IS THE BEST

Southern Thedas: is rook tho

Ghilan'nain: muahahaha i have so many drago---nooo you killed my dragons and i am BLEEDING LIKE A MORTAL PIECE OF MORTAL SCUM

Elgar'nan: my dragon used to be bigger :(

Ghilan'nain: your dragon's fine

Elgar'nan: Ghilly, make it bigger again

Ghilan'nain: can't, too sad. blood. :(

Southern Thedas: *throwing nugs at blight* hELP

Lavellan, with half of Southern Thedas crammed into skyhold: thanks for the castle, vhenan, we'd all literally be dead without it, again

Morrigan: erm, Inky? seems everyone's telling Rook Solas is just a big monster lying liar who lies and blaming him for everything

Lavellan: that's what people do, blame Solas. had a bad day? blame Solas. Mythal wants to sever the titans' dreams? Blame Solas. Rashvine nettle sting? Blame Solas. Bring the veil 5/7 or so of the way down themselves after releasing the blight? Blame Solas. Rook let the gods out? Blame Solas

Morrigan: Inky.

Lavellan: you want me to go pour out my heart to the person who imprisoned vhenan and let out Ghilan'nain, Mother of Tentacles, and Elgar'nan "My Dragon is Bigger than Your Dragon" First and Worst of the Evanuris, don't you

Morrigan: yee

Lavellan: FINE but you better spill every ounce of tea you've got on the stupid child before i go because i need to at least make rook squirm a LITTLE

Morrigan: i thought you'd never ask

Elgar'nan: you won't make my dragon bigger??? fine i'll move the moon instead

Northern Thedas: i'm sorry what

Anyone at sea anywhere on the planet: I'M SORRY WHAT

Ghilan'nain: *throws a temper tantrum and dies*

Elgar'nan: >:(

Solas: fuck this shit, i'm getting out of Fade Jail

Rook: :(

Minrathous: fuck fuck fuck FUCK fuck fuck fuck FUCK FUCK FUCK

Solas: hello, people who enslaved my people for millennia, i am here to save the day i guess

Minrathous, slapping blight tentacles out of their faces: ...honestly thank you

Solas: wait what

Rook: I ESCAPE FADE JAIL SOLAS YOU BASTARD LYING LIAR WHO LIES

Lavellan: i will not murder the stupid child, i will not murder the stupid child, i will not murder the stupid child

Solas: you know what, fair play, here's the dagger, there's elgar'nan, ima bite his dragon, you go have a great time. have fun storming the blight tentacle

Venatori, poster children for the Leopards Who Eat People's Faces Party: nooo the leopards keep eating our faces

Minrathous: wow who could have possibly predicted that

Everyone else: yes, yes, very sad

Elgar'nan, eating every face in the magesterium and effectively cleansing Tevinter of the worst of its monsters in one fell swoop: ah, rook, you can't kill me, i have the biggest dragon ever to dragon

Dread Wolf: honestly he's kinda not wrong, this dragon is a bastard and i am like a fifth of its size and getting p tired, ngl

Rook's Blighted Companion: welp gonnae put this trauma to use for the greater good. go go gadget blight tentacles, release the Dread Pupper

Elgar'nan: *shocked pikachu*

Dread Wolf: *chomp*

Elgar'nan: *throws a temper tantrum and dies*

Solas: oh ffs finally

Rook: not so fast

Solas: oh ffs here we fucking go

Rook: i don't actually want to fight you

Solas: wait, what

Rook: i think this is all my fault but everyone keeps telling me i'm the hero and that's fucked up. and your vhenan, she's nice to me, no one really else is, i'm just everybody's apocalypse therapist, and i even kinda like you tbh, my whole team basically does fun stuff without me and doesn't even invite me to book club and emmrich's the only one who asks me about my feelings instead of just asking me to do stuff for them, and anyway, i'm going to trust the inquisitor here because i'm honestly starved for connection and she thinks you're worth saving so can we talk i don't wanna fight

Solas: what

Lavellan, out of sight, reliving the litany of "i will not murder this stupid child": oh haha awkward

Solas: look,,, i've been bound to the service of an ancient elvhen god for millennia and everything i do, whether i know it or not, is for her, so i can't do what you want and this sucks

Lavellan: even if i'm here, walking the din'an shiral with you?

Solas: ...vhenan

Lavellan: ;_;

Solas: ;_; ...I cannot

Morrigan: yo dread wolf, my mum's a piece of work and i have all her memories and everything she did to you was fuuuuuuuuucked up, anyway, over to her, honestly not pissed you killed that part of her btw, she reeeeally fucked you up, but rook somehow managed to talk her out of her essence, so that's impressive

Solas: what

Mythal: yeah i kinda tore you out of your home and twisted you from your purpose and made you do murder and worse for me for millennia and said i wanted your wisdom and then never ever listened to you ever and just dragged you through every atrocity i created and perpetuated

Solas: it hurts and i guess you're going to kill me now so here's the dagger ;_;

Mythal: it's still mostly your fault but i was there too i guess, anyway, i release you from my service, which i could have done at any point in the past several millennia but instead I tortured you endlessly, lol god of retribution, that's me. k bye

Solas: what the fucking fuck

Lavellan: right there with you, like literally forever, our love is a miracle and the only thing i can even cope with

Solas: yeah honestly fuck this shit, i'm out, i will put myself in fade jail

Lavellan: you are not going by yourself i stg take me with you i wanna go home

Solas: ...home is a literal prison now

Lavellan: sealed away from all this shit? from getting blamed for everything we do no matter how much we sacrifice? if it's you and me there together, i don't care if it's a grey box full of darkspawn

Solas: there's no darkspa--

Lavellan: ffs i said i want to go, you don't have to sell me on it. you're the only person in this world who Gets It. we go on together, forever.

Solas: *.* my wife

Lavellan: *.* my wolf

Northern Thedas: and rook saved the world from the dread wolf, who was a lying liar who lies

Southern Thedas: *busy being dead and blighted*

Lavellan: yeah, fuck this shit, we're out

[krems-chair]

Fuck the Chant of Light, wake up babes new sacred texts just dropped

[scribeofmorpheus]

Dragon Age the Dragon Rage sitcom scripts are finally here! this was too funny.

[mythalsknickers]

So this was JOKE years ago. but I was looking on the minrathous wiki page for location ideas for something (don't worry about it) and saw this.

and they key to the breach or the mark has been referred to as a song by Cole.

Wake up babes the Herald of Andraste was actually Andraste, the Maker was Solas and Felassan was probably Shartan all along.

[xmalikethx]

in case you want confirmation on whether Solas starts sobbing after Lavellan says “There is no fate but the love we share” 🥹

[cindlemain]

You've got to love Manfred

[taashyvashedan]

Taash & Antoine Fawn Over Their Dwarven Halves -Takes place after the 'Something's Coming' Quest- Taash and Antoine would most definitely bond over their affection over their dwarven lovelies. If anything, Taash probably dreams about a shared life of chaotic mayhem alongside Harding, in the sweetest way possible.

Antoine and Evka are #relationshipgoals for everyone at the camp ...and literally everyone everywhere.

Antoine and Taash most definitely would continue to yammer off a list of small things that both annoy them, but they both also find insanely attractive. Dwarven women are fierce like that.

Given that Taash clearly knows about Harding's love of plants, Taash would definitely take Harding back for a night picnic, and if possible a whole lotta "nothing."

(note: this is just a headcanon, this is not canon banter in-game. It should be, but it isn't.)

[asparklethatisblue]

Taash is a bad influence on The Baby (Manfred) and Emmrich will not let that stand

[mythalsknickers]

For DADWC and OC of your choice: “Despite what you think, I am completely capable of taking care of myself”

TITLE: Lavender and Sleepless Nights PAIRING: Crow! Rook x Lucanis Dellamorte/Spite RATING: Teen? WARNINGS: Injured Main Character, Hurt Comfort, Spoilers for Act 1 of Dragon Age Veilguard Quest Sea of Blood Word Count: 1,530

The contract had been completed, both Lucanis' and his own, taking the long way to the Diamond had been chosen for the fact, well going the short way could be challenging and with Lucanis just being freed. The risk was not worth it. It was safer to take the long way and it gave them all some time to decompress a little.

Slipping into the casino through the back door, Teigue lead them to the stairs. Once upon a time he had the number of steps counted and memorized, now though he could not remember how many stairs there was, taking a slight breath he started the ascent to the top of the Diamond.

"I did not know it was possible to build this many stairs." He glanced back towards Bellara and Lucanis' chuckle caught him off guard, his cheeks growing warm. Some things never changed in a year it seemed. Twisting back he felt a sharp pain, biting his cheek, face scrunched up he reached down adjusting his belt leaving his hand resting against his hip. It had been a risk it would open back up, but they would not be here long and he could fix it when they got back to the Lighthouse.

"Some of the houses make the fledglings walk the steps to build stamina." that warmth made it hard to focus on the task of getting up the staircase and to Viago and Teia harder, even harder to focus on keeping pressure on his hip. Darkspawn looking nug cursed Venatori. Teigue hummed his agreement shifting his hand pushing more into the hip. Slowly as the climbed the sounds of the casino filtered away and the sounds should have replaced with the sounds of dueling, petty arguing over how to sew banners, and comparing mark throws.

His shoes hit marble and he took a breath looking over at the zipline. "Teigue, we are never taking the stairs again, in fact I am letting Harding cook tonight." His eyes widened as he jerked to look at Bellara, biting his cheek to silence the hiss burning in his throat. "Bells! That is cruel!" he protested watching as Lucanis, he was tense a hint of a smile pulling at his lips, but even Teigue had felt the growing apprehension with how quiet the climb had been. Sliding his hand away from the wound it rested on his spellblade as they started the last flight of steps.

Lucanis had gone ahead of him if only by a few steps, and Teigue peaked around him. The top floor of the Diamond was in disarray, and he could hear Teia and Viago yelling at each other or someone else. His brows knitted locking gazes with Lucanis, it was a moment of both of them speaking with only a few looks. Straightening up Teigue took a purposefully heavy step onto the balcony.

The realization of Catarina dead...it had made for a quiet trip back to the crossroads and the Lighthouse. He stared into the mirror taking a shaky breath, starting the process of removing layers of leathers and the linen shirt. Small whimpers met with his furrowed brows, and hisses were greeted with clenched teeth, he was pale. It had taken longer to get back than he had wanted. Crimson stained the linen shirt.

Pain. Anger. Sorrow Catarina brought all those emotions, she was an intense woman and now the seat of First Talon was vacant. Carefully he turned to his mirror, twisting and gently pressing along the edges of the cut, eyes watering as he hiss. It went deep, and felt too hot, there was the familiar tinge sickening pink. "Meirda!" He growled pulling his fingers away. The mage bane explained his present lack of appetite and the fade around the Lighthouse looking nauseatingly displaced. He could feel blood rushing to the would from his prodding, placing his hand over it he tired to bend down to pull his pack up onto the couch. He knew he had a linen bandages that would tied him over while he gathered herbs from the kitchen. Biting his cheek he pulled the bag up, another small whimper leaving his lips. Digging through it he finally found the linen wrap or at least one of them. It was methodical, he had done this before. Start from the dominant side, apply a safe amount of pressure while he wrapped the bandage.

He tried to wait until he was sure no one lingered in the courtyard before dipping out of the library and walking as quickly as the injury would allow to the kitchen. His brows knitted as he pushed against the door until it opened enough for him to slip through. Carefully he closed it. Now he just needed to head over to the stove and gather the elfroot, yarrow, lavender and a little honey for the salve. Creeping across the room it was not until about half way a wisp caused him to jump and the board creaked. Hissing in antivan under his breath he waited. Blood. Why ROOK. Blood? Spite pushed against his mind through the fade. Fuck. He tried to convey it was nothing to worry about. He quickly finished crossing the room and began to look around the cabinets before spotting the herbs where he could not reach. Narrowing his eyes, a sigh left the mage as he took another breath and forced him up onto the counters, his hip and side starting to feel like fire, and he was growing dizzy. Leaning against the wall he pulled a few sprigs of elfroot down.

"Fine Spite, I will look." He jerked his head to the pantry door, oh meirda. The maker was funny. Reaching up he wobbled pulling some lavender down. "Teigue what are yo--Meirda!" Oh shit, He did not have much time to get the last of the herbs he needed.

"It looks worse then tis. I promisse" He reached to grab the yarrow and the dull fire twisted turning into a sharp shard like pain causing him to fold in on himself, hand pressing against the bandages realizing they where damp and sticky. He could admit that was not good. He was not entirely sure when Lucanis closed the space between them but he felt an arm around his hips. "Meirda estupidus." the older crow growled pulling him down into his arms. They felt warmer than he remembered. "Teigue how long has this been bleeding?" Lucanis shifted his arms getting him into a carry, with an arm supporting his back and one at the base of his knees. His face felt hot was he blushing. Fuck. "Ehhhh it opened at the diamante thought there was a..." his brain struggled for the common word. "Potion in my bag." He managed as his back made contact with a blanket. "'Spite what you are thinking...Imm completely capable of taking care of myself." He grumbled only to be acknowledged by a hum and the flash of a dagger was the only warning he had before the linens were cut away.

"Meirda, Teigue! no wonder it opened up." The older crow glared at well it was hard to put to words what they were, with a suffering sigh as blood inner mingled with the ooze of mage bane trailed down his hip. Teigue winced as the man dug through a bag before producing a potion. It was pressed to his lips. "Drink." It brokered no argument, the potion tasted like elfroot and dawn lotus his nose wrinkling as he downed it. Then he felt hands back on his gash pushing along it for to pull the last of mage bane out, teigue whimpered, biting his lip holding as still as possible. Liquid splashed across the wound and he felt like he screamed maybe just hissed but he did try to get up only to be met with a hand on his chest. "Stay Put." The edge in the voice and the way Lucanis stared at him pinned him in place. There was sharp stabbing pain. "If you squirm Teigue, I will miss and have to re do the stitches." He did try to hold still, counting helped or rather it did if he didn't lose count around fifteen.

"He has been asleep for awhile Bellara." Lucanis' voice cut through the warm breeze of the treviso summer. "Mage bane can take alot out of a mage, especially if it was in his system awhile, It will take him a bit to wake up." He heard the boards shift and felt the weight of Lucanis leaning against the bed. "mio cielo..." that sounded like a lecture and he could not stop the yawn.

"Mhm Lucanis?" he yawned again reaching up to rub his eyes. Their relationship was complicated but...they were always there for each other. "Finally awake, here eat an orange, it will help. Don't do that again." The orange was held to him and he grabbed it peeling it and starting to snack on it. "I will do my best, are you going to let me up." Lucanis leaned back looking at him, those brown eyes just deadpan. "Right. I will stay here tonight."

[67inchez]

me omw posting my art that i made months ago all bc of my lazyness

[jingtaikokkaku]

Cute things.

[wolfram-but-art]

there have been a few spy voicelines that ive been able to imagine vividly, and i needed to draw them.

reblogs >>> likes

[shadowsxgwynriel]

Reading Comprehension: the ability to process text, understand its meaning, and to integrate with what the reader already knows.

It’s not that we don’t have any reading comprehension, because we do. If you’ve read any of SJM’s other books, then you should know her pattern by now, especially when it comes to mates. SJM is very much a “if it’s not broke, don’t fix it” kind of author. Meaning, she has established a specific vocabulary when it comes to her mated couples, confirmed or speculated.

Aelin and Rowan

Rowan made her magic sing. And maybe that was the carranam bond between them, but … her magic wanted to dance with his. And from the frost sparkling in his eyes, she knew his own demanded the same.

When they’d finished after that first time, he’d been left reeling, to pull his sanity back together after the joining that had … unleashed him. Broken and remade him. His magic had been a song, and she had been…. He’d never had anything like her.

Mate. His mate. He should have known about that, too. Even if rage and grief had turned him into a miserable bastard, he should have known who she was, what she was, from the moment he’d bitten her at Mistward, unable to stop the urge to claim her. The moment her blood had landed on his tongue and it had sung to him, and then refused to leave him alone, its taste lingering for months.

Her magic flared in answer, a ripple of power dancing through her. As if it had found a mirror of itself in the world, as if it had found the countermelody to its own song.

Rowan scanned the field, heart thundering. But the bond in his chest glowed strong, fire-bright.

Aelin panted, speaking above the glorious roar of magic through her, the unbreakable song of her and Rowan.

Feyre and Rhysand

Rhys still knelt, wings drooping across the white sheets, head bowed, his tattoos stark against his golden skin. A dark, fallen prince. The painting flashed into my mind. Flashed—and stayed there, glimmering, before it faded. But it remained, shining faintly, in that hole inside my chest. The hole that was slowly starting to heal over.

I was his and he was mine, and we were the beginning and middle and end. We were a song that had been sung from the very first ember of light in the world.

Nesta and Cassian

Those golden threads between their very souls shone with the words, as if they formed a harp strummed by a heavenly hand. For it was music between their souls. Always had been. And his voice was her favorite melody.

The golden threads shimmered and sang, and she couldn’t take it, the music between their souls, the feel of his body on her and in her, and—

Her mate. Her love. Her friend. The light within her chest brightened to a radiant sun.

Bryce and Hunt

“You could use some joy,” Hunt said quietly. Something bright sparked in her chest.

She made a soft sound and nuzzled her head into his neck. Something deep in him shifted and settled.

His lightning flowed into her like a river, and he could have sworn he heard a beautiful sort of music between their souls as Bryce said, “We need reinforcements.”

Bryce’s heart tightened and something brighter than starlight filled her veins. It remained, shimmering and secret, glowing inside her for the rest of the day.

Lidia and Ruhn

Her voice was beautiful. Like a golden song. It stirred his Fae soul, made it perk up.

Gwyn and Azriel

“How was the party?” Her breath curled in front of her mouth, and one of his shadows darted out to dance with it before twirling back to him. Like it heard some silent music.

Gwyn smiled broadly. “Thank you.” Azriel dipped his head in a sketch of a bow, something restless settling in him. Even his shadows had calmed. As if content to lounge on his shoulders and watch.

Azriel entered the warmth of the stairwell, and as he descended, he could have sworn a faint, beautiful singing followed him. Could have sworn his shadows sang in answer.

She deserves something as beautiful as this. I thank you for the joy it shall bring her. Something sparked in Azriel’s chest, but he only nodded his thanks and left. He could picture it, though, as he ascended the stairs back to the House proper. How Gwyn’s teal eyes might light upon seeing the necklace. For whatever reason . . . he could see it. But Azriel tucked away the thought, consciously erasing the slight smile it brought to his face. Buried the image down deep, where it glowed quietly. A thing of secret, lovely beauty.

So you see, it’s not that we don’t have any reading comprehension, or that we haven’t read any of her other books. We have and that’s why we can see a very obvious pattern in her writing. It doesn’t really matter if certain characters are flirting or lusting after each other, because we’ve seen that happen in other SJM works, and a lot of the time they were in actual relationships. But none of it amounted to anything, because they weren’t mates or right for each other.

You can’t just acknowledge things that you think might add some importance to your ship, and yet also ignore the mate song that SJM has seemingly scattered throughout all of her series. That’s called selective reading.

[momochanners]

Team Thirsty is damn impressed with the gun show!

Don’t stop, Varric honhonhon

—

Inspired by these beauties. Hot diggity dang, can’t wait to get my artbook copy.

But first…bedtime T_T

[zevrn]

Well, well…