CJ's Auto Shop

Chris Wyatt, also known as CJ to some. 35. Born and raised in Florence, Georgia. I drink too much, I smoke, and I'm not the man your mama wants you to end up with, but I did somehow end up with one kid of my own and another adopted one. OOC disclaimer: I am not, nor have I ever pretended to be, Jensen Ackles.

[cjwyatt-blog]

deannamonty replied to your post: Soooo inquiring minds would like to know if y’all need help at the shop? :)

Alright. Do /you/ need help at the shop, Mr. Wyatt? *crosses fingers*

I'll get back to you on that. Gimme a little while to think about it.

[cjwyatt-blog]

Soooo inquiring minds would like to know if y'all need help at the shop? :)

We don't actually, because there's no we. Me, on the other hand...

[k-rushing-blog]

 TEXT TO CJ

Okay. Yeah…I can do that. I…yeah. And hey…the next time I start freaking out about something, I should maybe just remember to talk to you first…because you always make it sound so simple.

[cjwyatt-blog]

TEXT TO KATE:

Everythin's always easier said than done.

[k-rushing-blog]

TEXT TO CJ

I know. You’re right. You are. I just…Elsa wants me to call her. And I don’t know what to say to her, you know? And I hurt for her, I guess. Because she lost her son - whatever choices he made…she lost him. And I guess I don’t know what to do.

[cjwyatt-blog]

TEXT TO KATE:

You don't have to say anythin'. Just listen to what she's got to say and go from there.

[k-rushing-blog]

TEXT TO CJ

Well, I do. Whenever I think of Elsa - Jake’s mom. I mean…she tried to do right by him. She did. She’s a lovely woman. And she tried to raise him right, and he still turned out the way he did. What if there’s nothing you can do about it? I will always love Luke, you know…even if he was like Jake, I would never love him less.

[cjwyatt-blog]

TEXT TO KATE:

I don't doubt that people with good parents can come out fucked up. But it's up to that person, and obviously somebody did somethin' wrong with Jake to make him think it was the right way to be.

[k-rushing-blog]

TEXT TO CJ

Do you ever stop to wonder what it’d be like if the worst happened and Luke ever came out anything like Jake when he grows up?

[cjwyatt-blog]

TEXT TO KATE:

Not really, no.

[cjwyatt-blog]

k-rushing replied to your post: k-rushing replied to your post: This is one of...

Ahhh. Well, I’ll see what I can do about the quiet and the whiskey, then, for when you get home.

Thanks, babe.

[cjwyatt-blog]

k-rushing replied to your post: This is one of those days where it’d be nice to go...

What happened?

Nothin'. S'just been a long week.

[cjwyatt-blog]

This is one of those days where it'd be nice to go home and just have complete quiet, a few shots of whiskey, and a nap.

[joelmchle]

[onlysupercars]

by This will do

[affluence-de-la-vie]

source

[cjwyatt-blog]

I gotta say - nice job, Houston.

That was quite a turnaround.

[k-rushing-blog]

Someone's bound to get burned. (5:36 pm)

[k-rushing-blog]

Katie smiled, pressing her lips against his. “And that’s all I could ever dream of,” she said softly. “Better than I ever dreamed, really. You are my happily ever after, you and him. And I am very sorry about tonight.” She squeezed his hand, smiling again. “You really just have no idea how wonderful you are.”

[cjwyatt-blog]

Chris shook his head and laughed, a small smirk on his lips. "I think we need to hurry up and order dinner," he said, completely off topic. "Because if I go any longer without food, I might get unpleasant."

With that, he kissed her forehead and detangled himself so that he could take his phone from his pocket and make his way to the kitchen, where the assortment of takeout menus waited, hanging from the fridge by an assortment of magnets.

[k-rushing-blog]

Someone's bound to get burned. (5:36 pm)

[k-rushing-blog]

“You don’t have to shove everything under the rug to have a happy ever after with me,” Katie said quietly, silently cursing herself for feeling as insecure as she did in that moment. She hated him ever talking about their future in such a bleak way. “We can have a new kind of happy ever after. Because that’s all I’ve ever wanted with you Chris, so no, it isn’t stupid. It won’t be like we ever imagined it…but it will still be happy.”

She listened to everything he said, nodding along. It stung a little, but at the same time, Katie felt a tension start to ease from her shoulders, and she gladly accepted the embrace he gave her. “Don’t be silly, okay?” she said. “I appreciate more than anything the fact that you’re being honest, and actually…that was a better answer than I ever could’ve hoped for. That’s all I need, okay? I just need to know you’ll be there. Because honestly, when I thought I might be…I worried that, even if things did work out and it was safe with me…that it would hurt you. And that’s the last thing I’ve ever wanted.” She reached down, interlacing her fingers with Chris’ and glancing over at Lukey on the ground. “I’ve got everything I could ever need with you. And I don’t need anymore, not if you don’t. I just got all dumb and girly about it, with everything that’s tied to it, and…as long as I know I’ve still got you and Luke, the rest just isn’t so important, you know?”

[cjwyatt-blog]

"Havin' a kid wouldn't hurt me, Kate," Chris replied. "It'd scare the shit out of me, but it wouldn't hurt me." He pulled back and hooked a finger under her chin, lifting it so that he could kiss her on the lips. When he finally pulled back, he smiled softly, tightening the arm around her.

His fingers trailed along her cheek and tucked her hair behind her ear, admiring the curve of her jaw and smoothness of her creamy skin. "You've always got me and Luke, Kate. We're not goin' anywhere."

[k-rushing-blog]

Someone's bound to get burned. (5:36 pm)

[k-rushing-blog]

The second the question left Katie’s mouth, she wished she could take it back. It was one rule she’d always tried to strictly follow with Chris - to never ask about the future. She had long ago accepted, even when they were friends, that that simply wasn’t how Chris worked. 

She nodded her head enthusiastically as he talked, as if trying to make up for ever asking the question. “Of course, of course…I don’t expect you to…” Still, she could help the way her lip quivered as he delivered the blow that no, he probably wouldn’t ever want more kids. 

The funny thing was, she could distinctly recall a time where she thought someday, her, Chris, and Lukas would be a family and that would be all they could ever be. And that idea never bothered her. But now - ever since Jude was born - it kind of hurt her, if she was being honest. It was hard for her to know that Bella was going to have something she probably never would. She knew that was selfish, and it wasn’t as if she hated Jude - but she hated that Bella was the one that got to have Chris’ kid, and not her. 

She shook her head. “I understand. I do - I…I swear I do, okay?” She couldn’t ever try to tell him how jealous she was of Bella, how it hurt her every day to think of the fact that she had Chris’ child when Katie never would…but then again, Katie probably never could, either. “I only just asked because…well, I guess - I just wanted to think that if it had happened, you’d have been happy about it. Because I would’ve, you know? I know we didn’t plan it and it’s the worst possible time…but I would’ve been happy, and I would’ve wanted you to be happy with me.”

She breathed heavily, wiping her eyes. “It’s not that I’m not happy, how it is. Luke is…more than I could have dreamed of, and you and us are just the greatest thing I’ve ever had…but I…” a tear slipped down her cheek, and she covered her face. “God, I’m sorry, Chris. I’m sorry. I guess it just got me thinking about…about what happened, with Jake, y’know? And how - well, it doesn’t even matter, really. Because even if I was, it probably wouldn’t have worked…and I guess that’s what…that’s what scares me. And it makes me angry. God, it makes me so angry, Chris. Because it’s one thing to go on with life, deciding not to have children with you and be our own little family in however we got here, but…to think that if accidents happen, and we ever did…I don’t know if that baby would survive, you know? And it’s his fault and that makes me angry and it scares me and there’s a little part of me that wants to know…but it doesn’t even matter, because I’m choosing it. But…fuck, I’m not making any sense, am I?”

[cjwyatt-blog]

Chris shook his head. "Katie, stop it. You know I'd be happy. It's just... I mean, not many guys have one kid with one girl and then only a handful of weeks later get their girlfriend pregnant. Well, they do, but... Guys like me don't even think about raisin' a family until it's starin' at 'em in the face and we've got to, and... I love bein' here for Luke. I love Jude. But... I don't want anybody to give me any more chances. I don't need another kid at stake. I've always wanted to have a happily ever after with you, Kate, as stupid as that sounds, but I don't know if it's gonna happen anymore. I don't know if we can shove everythin' under the rug anymore."

He cupped her face in his palms and sighed, kissing her forehead. "If you were pregnant, Kate, I'd do everythin' for you. I'd do anythin' to make sure that kid was safe and healthy. I'd make everythin' perfect for you. But I... I don't know if havin' a kid is somethin' I'd do voluntarily anymore. But if you were pregnant, we'd have that baby and I'd protect him with my life. Jake doesn't have control of us. I think that we could do anythin' we put our minds to."

Chris felt a weight on his shoulders, and he pulled Katie back to his chest, resting his chin on her head and closing his eyes. "I know it's not the answer you wanted to hear, and I'm sorry. But I don't wanna lie to you."

[k-rushing-blog]

Someone's bound to get burned. (5:36 pm)

[k-rushing-blog]

He spent so long not talking that eventually, Katie forced herself to look at him, and found his lips pressed tightly together. Instantly, her stomach dropped. AT his questions, her lip quivered. 

“No,” she said softly, a heavy sigh escaping with the word. “No, I’m not…and no, I haven’t taken one.” Her voice was low, but she wasn’t crying. “I didn’t even up needin’ to. Came home and wen tot go do it and…well, apparently got my negative sign on the car ride back.” 

She tossed the test onto the coffee table, sitting down and looking up at him. “I wasn’t gonna tell you unless I was sure, because I know…anyway, I’m sorry. I wasn’t really planning on saying anything if I just ended up being late, but I guess…” she laughed softly under her breath, running her fingers through her hair. “It’s stupid. It’s really, really stupid. I didn’t even…I don’t even want…I have Lukas, and you  have Jude, and that’s enough.” She looked up at him, imploring him with her eyes to try to understand. “You are enough. You and Luke…but I guess I can’t help but wonder. And I’m sorry. But can I just ask you something? Please. And whatever you have to say is - is completely fine - but would you ever…five, ten, hell, fifteen years from now…would you ever want to have kids with me?” 

[cjwyatt-blog]

Chris let out a heavy sigh and ran his hands over his face, through his hair. Finally, he reached out for Katie and pulled her back into another hug, knowing that she was upset. He wished he could have reacted better, but the way his gut tightened and his legs went numb at the idea of having another child kept him from reacting in any way just shy of less-than-pleasant.

"Katie..." he started, not sure what to say. He wanted her to be happy, and he wanted to have a family with her. But he already had one, didn't he? Did they need to expand it to prove that they were a real family? "You know I love you. And Luke and Jude, too. You guys are my family, and that's never gonna change. We do have a family together. But... I can't really talk about the future. I can't think that far ahead."

Chris sighed again and shook his head. "I wanna make you happy, I do. But I... I don't know if havin' more kids is right for me. I don't know if I'd be able to handle all that."