To say Shi Shu was nervous would be an understatement; his nerves were so on edge that he feared that he might still be shaking for days after this.
From a rational level, Shi Shu was well aware of the list of possibilities of what could possibly happen now, but it was one thing to know, and a whole different beast to experience it.
He could have listen out loud 69 different positions and their benefits according to the gender of the participants, but in terms of experience, he was still sitting on stage zero!
And at this point, he knew damn well that he couldnât fully trust his books to tell him the full truth; heâd read so many romances, read all sorts of lewd descriptions, but not a single one of of those stories could have possibly braced him for the sensation of another personâs breath and warmth in his mouth, the slippery feeling of a tongue that didnât belong in his mouth, the way Leilaniâs bottom lip always looked so flushed and swollen after he sucked on it and traced his tongue across itâŚ
If a kiss had felt so different from what heâd imagined, then Shi Shu could only wait in a mix of excitement and barely concealed nervousness, as his husband began his descent.
Staring pointedly at the ceiling, Shi Shu took a long deep breathâwhich then practically stuttered out of his chest when Leilani pushed the rest of his robes aside, baring him completely except for his underwearâŚ.which was doing a terrible job at concealing anything at this point, Shi Shu could tell that much without having to even look downâhe could feel the strain of his cock trying to stretch the fabric, specially now that the weight of his robes was gone, leaving him pointedly aware of the wetness that he could feel gathering inside his underwear and oh god, it was probably seeping through the fabric, and Leilani was staring and there was no way that there wasnât a massive stain on the front and Leilani wasâ
âM-hm!â Shi Shu whimpered, startling at the sudden contact, instinctively looking down andâŚand heavens, that was a terrible decision, because Leilani was already looking up at him, watching him with an intensity that should be straight up illegal, and his cheeks were so red, redder than Shi Shu had ever seen, and under any other circumstances, he might have reached down to cup that warm cheek in his hand, maybe pull him up to watch it more closelyâŚ
But! Maybe not when he had his hand pressed right against his boner!
Fingers hooked around his underwear just as his head snapped back to stare intensely at the ceiling, and if Shi Shu had felt bared before, then he wasnât even sure how to process his own nakedness the moment his underwear slipped down his legs, leaving every single inch of his skin naked and exposed to Leilaniâs eager gaze. And right there, standing tall and proud, the darn traitor that throbbed eagerly for attention, so honest compared to itâs owner.
It took several deep breaths, just to keep his heart from crawling out of his throat as he felt Leilaniâs hands caressing his legs, his legs twitching occasionally, fighting back the urge to quickly clap them closed, specially when he felt Leilani coming closer, so close that he could feel the warmth of his body before he even touched him.
But when he did, it nearly sent Shi Shu flying through the freaking roof.
A warm hand, bigger and stronger than his own, cradled and engulfed his cock in a way that his own, much thinner hand could never achieve, and that alone was enough to make Shi Shuâs hips cant upwards, seeking more of that touch. âA-Ahâ!â Shi Shu threw his head back, hips twitching minusculely when a calloused thumb pressed against the tip, something akin to a pained whine squeezing out of his throat when that same desperately needed pressure vanished, leaving him twitching with dissatisfaction.Â
 Too riled up to care about embarrassment at this point, Shi Shu finally tilted his head down again to see what had made Leilani stop.
His bravery was rewarded with a sight that would haunt his dreams for months, if not years; Leilani braced on his legs, face flustered as he slowly leaned down to take his length into his mouth, full lips pressing like a kiss against the wet crown before spreading open wide, taking him inside, smearing a trail of precum across his tongueâ
âL-Leilani! Youâ!â The alarm in his voice merged into a moan, and suddenly he wasnât even sure what he was trying to say. In fact, he was pretty sure that anything that resembled or was close to coherent thought had just poured out of his head through his ears; all that was left was Leilani, and the wet, warm and tight slide of his mouth as he swallowed him whole, just pure, raw pleasure dripping down every inch of his body like Shi Shu had never felt it before, making his toes curls against the mattress and his stomach flutter with each shaky breath that he took.
Heavens, the most heâd ever known was the rare encounters with his own hand, and those had been painfully dry, rushed, and mingled heavily with a dosage of self-deprecating guilt. And now, he wasnât sure if he would ever want the touch of his own hand again, though, after experiencing this.Â
 This should just be their new nightly routine from now on, or even their morning routine, he certainly wasnât pickyâShi Shu thought, somewhere in the scattered mess of his thoughts, too lost and drowning in the sea of sensations that was Leilaniâs mouth to care about âshameâ or any of the other useless things that usually stood like a filter between his thoughts and his actions.
Shi Shuâs hands moved without even bothering to request any form of consent from his brain, shaky as they reached down to stroke Leilaniâs cheekâbreath hitching in his throat when he realized that he could literally feel himself through itâbefore sliding up to bury his fingers in his hair; not pulling, not tugging, just nervously kneading his curls like one might squeeze a stressball.
Shi Shu wasnât a loud person. His voice was always kept at a nice, pleasant tone, his happiness was quiet and often expressed through the barrier of a decorative fan, and even when he was mad or frustrated, he would never raise his voice.
Therefor, knowing himself as well as he did, Shi Shu was genuinely shocked when a moan blurted out of his mouth just when Leilani teased the tip of his cock with his tongue, a sound that returned over and over again, more and more frequent with each repetition; deep breaths gradually becoming ragged, breathless gasps becoming proper whimpers when he increased his pace, his mouth, for once, refusing to be silenced.
âNuan nanânuan nan! IâŚI canâtâoh god!â Shi Shu whimpered, his grip on his hair tightening and his eyes squeezed shutâwhich, again, was even worst, because now he could hear every single little sound, every wet, slippery slide of Leilaniâs mouth around him, the wet strokes of his tongue when he stopped at the top, his groans and frantic breaths as heâŚ.
And then, like an epiphany, it suddenly struck him; there was only one hand on him. Â
There was only one arm braced on his leg, only one hand wrapped around his length, but he couldnât feel Leilaniâs other hand anywhere else in his body.
Forcing his eyes open, Shi Shu hesitantly peered down at Leilani.
âŚ.He found his other arm.
Shi Shu had never seen another man pleasuring himself. Not even himself. All of his affairs with his hand had happened through the tissue that he would wrap around himself first, and it was either under the six layers of blankets in his bed, or in the bath, where his hand would be hidden away from view under a layer of bubbles, so that he could almost pretend that he wasnât doing anything wrong, just innocently washing himself. Thoroughly.
He couldnât tear his eyes away, though, from the hand moving stiffly between Leilaniâs legs, like he was just barely holding himself back from rubbing himself raw, and although the skirts of Pali Kai had a lot of room, Shi Shu could see as clear as day, the bulge pressed against his own hand.
His hand twitched where it gripped Leilaniâs shoulder; he wanted to touch it. He wanted to know how it would feel, to weight it in his palm, feel itâs warmth, itâs girth, he wanted to see Leilaniâs face twisted with pure pleasure as he wrapped his hand around himâwould his hands even be big enough, oh god, what if he had to use two hands, and why was the thought so dangerously trillingâand then, maybeâŚmaybe heâd be able to show him what heâd learned with him, and gods above, he wanted to, he wanted him so badlyâÂ
 Shi Shuâs cock gave a happy little throb inside Leilaniâs mouth, the pressure behind his balls suddenly drew taunt, and before Shi Shu could help it, his hips began to twitch, desperately chasing after the heat of his mouth even though he actually meant to do the opposite. âN-Nuan nan, stand back! I canâtâIâm so close, Iâm soâ!â Shi Shu whimpered, trying desperately to pull his head back, but his hands were too shaky, and he was so close, so close that he could almost taste it, the sensation almost edging towards the wrong side of too much by the time he tipped over the edge.
A ragged moan poured out of his throat as if he was being gutted alive, his back arching off the bed as his whole body convulsed, as years of pent up energy and sexual-repression poured out of him.Â
Shi Shu wasnât even sure what he was saying; he was vaguely aware of hearing himself saying something making to âso good, so good to meâ, a scrambled mess in Ban Zi Zhenâs dialect that could be summed up as just a continuous and desperate string of lewd pleas that he would never translate to Leilani, and repetitive warnings trying to tell Leilani to pull away.
 And maybe in a few minutes, he would be able to feel thoroughly mortified over the fact that he could literally feel himself pouring his cum inside Leilaniâs mouth like a fountain, mostly because he could feel some leaking out of his mouth and running down the sides of his sated erectionâŚbut right now, Shi Shu didnât have the strength to even think, much less gather enough to be anxious about anything.
Finally coming down from itâs high, Shi Shuâs body dropped back against the bed, still shaking and twitching, skin flushed pink and chest heaving like heâd just ran for miles.
How was he meant to justâŚmove on with his day after this? No wonder people always did this at night, he could hardly bear the thought of moving, much less walk.
ââŚNuan nan.â Shi Shu rasped out, his throat dry and slightly sore, but his tone was dripping like hot melted chocolate, lazy and languid from the afterglow, looking like a pile of just content and thoroughly sated shaky limbs.
It only lasted so long, though; the moment he managed to crack his eyes open again, Shi Shuâs gaze dropped back on Leilani, and the consequences hit him like a slap to the face.Â
âOh. O-Oh no! WeâŚwe need to get you a cup, water, a towel, oh gods, I justâ! In your mouth, oh no I didnât mean toâ!â He spluttered, clumsy limbs, still buzzing and everything, already trying to sit up to grab all the necessary items.
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