Think Too Much

I'm just a normal person from Singapore who has conversations with myself in my head and need to shut them down by writing it somewhere. The inner musings of an outgoing introvert.

[somepiecesofmyheartandsoul-deac]

Ask me to stay. – Lukas W.

[animalrates]

I’ve never been so satisfied watching a bearded dragon eat blueberries. 12/10 must watch!

[potheadpotter]

Everything in life is better now

[geealiceart]

[floralls]

[cliffylord]

Was an innocent young naive boy who believed in destiny and fate. Was.

[cliffylord]

Fell in love today. <3 (at Singapore Tiong Bahru)

[cliffylord]

You always had people to snapchat with. And they were always people I didn't know. 'Privacy eh'.

[cliffylord]

The amount of anguish that your guilt has caused... I was at the tipping point of recovery. Now I'm at the bottom of the valley. Fuck.

[cliffylord]

I don't want to be that crazy ex who never lets go.

[cliffylord]

I'm sorry for going on a grad trip. I'm sorry for not being understanding enough. I'm sorry for not being accepting enough. I'm sorry for not being observant enough. I'm sorry for not being attractive enough. I'm sorry for not being there. I'm sorry for loving you too much. I'm sorry for being too possessive. I'm sorry for being that psycho. I'm sorry for being tired of fighting. I'm sorry for being so curious and inquisitive. I'm sorry for rushing into things. I'm sorry for reacting too much.

[cliffylord]

You never ever told people who are interested in you that you were attached. You always let them have the hope remain in their hearts, as if you might still explore that option in the future. You should not get into LDR. With the distance, you might get bored and turn to other people again.

[cliffylord]

When you turned to other people, when you were bored because I wasn’t in the same time zone, that was the biggest form of disrespect.

You were never proud to show me off, it was like you were ashamed of me.

You moved on so fast, developing feelings for the one you turned to when we were together, as if you were already preparing a succession plan, laying out the grounds for the next relationship.

You texted me to inform me that he has feelings for you, with the reason being me finding you incredulous, but I feel that it’s more than that.

You meeting other guys that you met through social apps for dates without informing me, for fear that I would overthink, was another form of disrespect. (only 6.5 months into the relationship) I feel so stupid, for not realizing it and continuing to love you.

All these - generated a lot of anger. I don’t know if I should follow Habit 1: Be Proactive, the concept of taking responsibility for the situation that I have created. Or if I should place the responsibility on you. Perhaps it should be both of us. And I should learn to forgive the both of us.

[cliffylord]

I don't wanna be a loser. 😭 #vscocam #vsco

[iraffiruse]

[cliffylord]

View from right outside the hostel that's located on top of a hill. Looks like the daily climb up and down was worth it 👌. Goodbye Salzburg, now for the last stop - Munich! (at Stadtalm Naturfreundehaus - Salzburg)

[our-amazing-world]

Mountain Bluebird Amazing World beautiful amazing

[cliffylord]

Expectations

Expectations are scary. It makes you disappointed. I was fine all along without them. Until you came and let me hope, building up my expectations. Expectations made me fantasize and day-dream about the perfect, ideal situation. It made me think that things should be a certain way, and then it all come crashing down when it didn’t. Life should be led without expectations. We should all replace expectations with goals. Because goals are easier, more personal. With goals comes action and responsibility on my part, not the environment, not the world.