Confessions of a Corprus Beast

Once upon a time, an Argonian got corprus and wrote about it. The End. An Elder Scrolls headcanon writing, art and portfolio blog. Q: Mods? Morrowind Overhaul base + other stuff. Try Morrowind Mod History. Q: Canon/non-canon blog? Canon, based on canon or entirely fictional but based on canon. You can find me picking flowers on the EU ESO server @Crucifigo. The content of this blog is intended for entertainment only. Don't attempt to replicate any of this in real life. You might catch corprus or something.

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i am moving this blog to here so its on my new account

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i am moving this blog to here so its on my new account

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i am moving this blog to here so its on my new account

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i am moving this blog to here so its on my new account

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i am moving this blog to here so its on my new account

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Necromancy: Corpse Farming Pt.2

Assuming you have successfully obtained your selection of fresh corpses, the second step is preparation. For the beginner necromancer, certain precautions must be taken to prevent accidental injury or embarrassment.

Men and the majority of Mer require little pre-resurrection treatment. Remove the fingers and file the teeth down to flat ridges. Amputate the hands in particularly muscular individuals, lest they bludgeon you to death or otherwise cause irreparable damage/shame to your body/reputation respectively.

All specimens should be shaved to maximise surface area. Should you find your corpses have begun sloughing from the head-down, relocate them to a cavern or tie straw hats to their heads. Alternatively, stop leaving zombies outdoors for extended periods. Remember, there is always a self-proclaimed hero waiting to lop off your head. Do not leave a breadcrumb trail of evidence leading to your door.

Orsimer: Require de-tusking, a task best done with a pair of pliers and some elbow grease. Try not to tug so hard that the teeth find themselves embedded in your forehead. Healers are typically skeptical of the ‘drunk Orc tried to eat my face’ story. The local guard, even moreso.

Khajiit: Khajiit preparation necessitates a little extra critical thinking, as their many breeds vary immensely in shape, size, and anatomy. Remove sharp teeth, tails, and claws. Amputate muzzle in beast-like breeds.

Argonian: Take care to remove all horns, claws, spines, fins, tail, and other prickly extremities. Check for palatal flap, remove if present. Pull teeth, amputate muzzle. Leave at least one inch of skull intact around the eye sockets. Peel away osteoderms with a crocodile skinning knife.

Igma, Lamia, Sload, Goblin-ken and Minotaurs are unsuitable candidates. Do not try to impress your friends with a rotting Giant corpse, no matter how certain you may be that it won’t smash your innards into an outer dimension.

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Nerevarine’s Journal: Pt.1

Day 1:

Dear Diary,

Father always said I should keep a journal. “No time like the present”, he’d remind me every time I forgot something. That happened often a lot. I suppose ‘unwillingly shipped off to a foreign country’ is a good time to start. It’s better than prison, I think. They let me have some paper and a pillow. Surely they can’t be taking us somewhere worse.

I’m sure the Aretino family are behind this. They never did like having foreigners in the estate, they said it ‘devalued their property’. Every year someone would vanish and they’d get all smug about it, like they knew something we didn’t. I knew father was right not to trust them, he always was. About most things. Varen’s dog definitely ate my lunch a few times.

Daisy is a nice dog, so I didn’t really mind. I hope she’s okay.

The guard says the other prisoner is called Jiub. He won’t tell me what he’s here for either. Maybe I can ask him when he wakes up.

Jiub says he was an assassin, but he got caught. Obviously. Seems very ashamed of it all. He told me we’re going to Vvardenfell, an island in Morrowind. Don’t have a clue where that is. Better than prison.

The guard is getting annoyed with us talking. Someone must’ve shoved a mighty stick up his arse.

Overheard one of the sailors saying we’re still at least half a day away.

May as well just sleep until we arrive, it’s awfully boring down here.

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Necromancy: Corpse Farming Pt.1

While necromancy is generally both illegal and reviled throughout Tamriel, it is an unspoken pact between necromancers and morally-lacking alchemists that provides a variety of reagents and solvents in amounts that no simple flower-picking holiday can provide. Also, occasionally a self-designated hero intervenes and carves local necromancers into multiple pieces. One must know more than one hobbyist necromancer to ensure a consistent supply.

‘Corpse farming’, typically followed by ‘corpse herding’, is the practice of using the undead as walking insect factories. The common fleshfly is a voracious eater of both fresh and necrotic tissue, but eggs are only produced when provided with a suitable environment. Wet carrion is most efficient, hence the use of reanimated corpses. The budding undead shepherd only needs a stick and a bucket of water and slops to cultivate their necrotic kingdom or underground zombie pen.

Ideally, one must live an isolationist lifestyle to successfully farm the undead. Accumulating your first flies requires leaving your reanimated corpse outdoors, which is typically frowned upon by neighbors and guardsmen. After two days your zombie should be quite literally buzzing with life. Not their own of course, in which case you may have missed some vital steps and should consider a change of career.

Many alchemists and merchants prefer not to ask unwanted questions and will gladly purchase both fresh and dessicated larva and flies by the bottle. These will mostly be sold on to poison-makers for tainting food or arrows, although those with great skill may produce distilled health tonics of surprising quality.

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you know how i keep saying i’ll log in and write something and then proceed to totally forget

well this time i remembered to log in

so im going to write about corpses

thanks mannimarco

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Drugs: Felldew

Who just puts bubbling insect mucus in their mouth? Urgh.

Felldew is a substance of dubious edibility found with the Shivering Isles. While usually impossible to obtain in any significant quantity, one may find small samples in private collections or daedric shrines, though fresh, uncontaminated portions are extraordinarily rare.

Felldew is excreted by ‘Elytra’, a pseudo-arachnid that may reach the size of a small horse. The majority of elytra do not secrete anything more than a potent toxin, rather it is a particular hive that produces felldew alongside their usual poison. These elytra can be distinguished by the acidic green glow penetrating their exoskeleton and abdominal skin.

Felldew itself is bright green, with a jelly-like consistency. It produces bubbles when exposed to air, inflating it slightly. While sticky when touched, it can be rolled into a ball and carried by hand easily by applying pressure. It resumes its wobbly, lumpy shape when released.

When consumed, felldew initially provides a significant feeling of euphoria. Alchemically, the senses are heightened while sensitivity to pain is dulled, which technically does allow the consumer to perform greater physical feats, although only due to the fact they cannot feel any strain.

Withdrawal strikes within an hour without continued consumption, resulting in clumsiness, shaking, reduced concentration and a general likelihood to experience unusually unpleasant events.

The second hour adds cramping, fatigue and poor resistance to bruising. By now, the user will struggle to keep presence of mind and may fixate on bugs. A strong blow to any part of the body will kill through uncontrolled internal bleeding.

By the third hour, the user is mostly immobile as they cannot walk or balance reliably, though they may resort to crawling, rolling, ‘inch-worming’ or other techniques to put more felldew within arms reach. Bug fixation may escalate to the point of outright eating insects.

After 4-5 hours and beyond, health begins to decline and previous symptoms will increase in intensity. Oddly, felldew withdrawal is never the immediate cause of death, and continued consumption does not result in tolerance. Theoretically, an individual could consume nothing but felldew and roots without dying of malnutrition.

Unfortunately the addiction cannot be cured by ordinary means, though the only way to reliably obtain felldew is to somehow enter the Shivering Isles and become exceptionally skilled in stabbing 100lb+ invertebrates. One would have more luck living in a rat pit and gnawing on raw moon sugar canes.

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Dreamers

Dreamers are a relatively recent phenomenon, and a particularly unusual one at that. Fanatics and cultists are no rarity on Vvardenfell, yet Dreamers stand out as one of the few groups of House Dagoth extremists in existence. Their consent in becoming Dagoth Ur’s latest arsenal is questionable at best.

Only Dunmer are known to become Dreamers, and are especially vocal in their beliefs, if somewhat unintelligible at times. Primary topics include Dagoth Ur, proud racism and somehow redirecting every line of conversation back to the glory of Dagoth Ur. Unsurprisingly, most people avoid talking to them.

Dreamers residing in civilized areas are rarely physically aggressive or dangerous, although they experience bouts of seizures and uncontrolled preaching when dragged away by the Temple. I assume they are bound and gagged, as nothing else will shut them up.

Cave-dwelling Dreamers represent a larger percent of the population, with a greater capacity for extreme and unusual acts. Cannibalism, ritual maiming and nudity are mainstream in their tiny, obsessive society. They may consume hunks of raw corprus flesh, or simply feast on their own using spiked clubs. Death by exsanguination is not uncommon, nor unwanted.

Eventually a Dreamer will become some variety of ash beast, and lose all sense of individuality completely in the process. Oddly, they become fixated on furniture and beetles, hoarding and attempting to arrange the two in erratic patterns. They seem oblivious to the fact that a squirming heap of live beetles generally will not remain in position, but will not actively attempt to harm them.

The greatest minority of Dreamers are those that retain their intellect completely, although anything unrelated to their sacred god is apparently discarded. They smuggle ash statues into nooks and crannies to forcibly convert their fellow people, while otherwise keeping up the pretense of normality until they are inevitability provoked by the mention of their illicit secret stash.

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Structural design.

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Bestiary: Horker

Felsaad Horker:

The sole resident subspecies of Solstheim. Unlike their relatives, these horkers only reproduce around the brine pool located at the bottom of Lake Fjalding. Said pool is toxic to most terrestrial animals, possibly serving to deter potential predators.

Felsaad horkers are notoriously aggressive and are often regarded as the ugliest type of seal in Tamriel. Where other varieties of horker have a typical mammalian face, the Felsaad horker instead possesses a pink tube of flesh, stretched around the signature three tusks. The lower set are thin and brittle, while the lone centre tooth barely erupts from the lip.

The eyes are small and beady, while the legs end in three elongated digits. The toes and claws are completely covered in fur, rendering them mostly useless as weapons.

Fat-Toothed Horker:

An uncommon subspecies of horker found in Wrothgaria. The thick central tusk protrudes from the upper jaw, typically reaching over three times the length of the two lower tusks. Both the unusual canine and body of the horker have the appearance of borderline obesity, hence its common name.

Great Horker:

The largest, and most well-known species of horker. A permanent resident of Skyrim, it has four legs, grotesquely bulging eyes and an exceptionally thick hide. A single adult may weigh over 3,500lbs, with a large percentage of that weight taken up by its skin and blubber. The trio of canine tusks are equal in length, although this is not visible unless the skull is cleaned and teeth are pulled through.

These horkers are a prime source of meat and trophies in Nordic culture, and also the death of many a young hunter who overestimated their skill. The flesh is salted and dried, or cooked fresh with herbs, while the whiskers are sold to merchants for use in exotic instruments.

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On Corprus & Medicine

Corprus, the incurable artificial disease native to Vvardenfell, its victims are both of great interest and scorn to the scholarly divisions of Tamriel. Many a mage, author and warrior has made an expedition into Red Mountain, against the advice of the local people, only to return dead, diseased or delirious.

To the people of Vvardenfell, corprus is a fact of life. Few natives travel the roads outside Ghostgate, and even fewer enter it. The majority of guilds and apothecaries stock protective potions and animal repellants, although their effectiveness is questionable. Only the devout, foolhardy and ‘heroic’ regularly gamble with the plague, either for religious experience or treasure of the not entirely legal variety.

Unfortunately, outsiders insufferable enough to enter Ghostgate without protection and return intact often take sensationalist stories and exaggerated tales back to their native lands, further diluting the already miniscule pool of legitimate information on the disease. Many of these individuals suffered from hypoxia or Chills at some point in their ‘expedition’, and genuinely believe whatever guar-piss comes out of their mouths.

‘Cures’ for the divine disease are typically rare, as any sensible individual understands that corprus is a death sentence, but the desperate and deluded fund the Temple-banned trade with whatever they can offer. Gold, family heirlooms, slaves, children (occasionally not their own). Quack medicine is a profitable business, should one be morally bankrupt enough to partake in it.

Common ingredients include unsterilized elven bonemeal (a prime source of dementia), rat organs, dried beast genitalia, or simple dirt. The wealthy can purchase services such as ritual sacrifice, or potions brewed from fresh body parts, usually taken from one of their slaves.

Of course, none of these techniques have the desired effect and often hasten death, leaving a bloody, pus-filled mess for the local guard to dispatch while the Temple quarantines the area and encourages those infected to banish themselves to the wilderness.

In short, there is no cure for the corprus disease, unless one happens to be Lord Nerevar reincarnate, and no amount of septims will make that happen.

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Crafting: Rubedo Leather

Rubedo leather is notorious in many ways. It is exceptionally difficult to work with, almost impossible to obtain in flawless condition and is hideously, undeniably ugly. Rubedo is tanned daedra skin of the highest quality, harvested from daedra with minimal bodily injuries. Of course, this is rather difficult as suitable daedra must be of a certain strength, and putting said victim down without ruining the hide is exceptionally difficult.

Harvested skin is first soaked in a mixture of bloodgrass, spiddal petals and boiling water for a day, which allows excess flesh and fat to be pulled away by hand, rather than scraped. The skin is then tied to a rack, rubbed with salt and left to dry.

Finally, the now crisp skin is broken in. Techniques for breaking hides vary, but fire salts ease the process by making the hide somewhat more pliable. A lining of wet daedric silk is padded onto the inside, and the hide is now suitable for working into clothing or armor.

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Bestiary: Shellbug

Shellbugs are an extraordinarily rare invertebrate, native only to the Vale in the northern reaches of Skyrim. Adult specimens are the easiest to find, as they rival a mature guar in sheer bulk. Juveniles have yet to be recorded or studied to any significant degree.

Initially, the shellbug appears to be immobile, making no attempts to defend itself or move away from harassers. Shellbugs do in fact shuffle from place to place, although they are so remarkably slow, one could abandon it for a week to find that it has not budged an inch.

The shellbug feeds on any and all organic matter located beneath their shell and directly in front of their head. The underside secretes a powerful melting agent, while edible matter is absorbed through the skin. This process creates winding pathways through solid ground, exposing nutrients and soil previously buried under the rocky terrain. The waste produced, combined with the centuries of unintentional terraforming, allows a variety of unique flora and microfauna to flourish in previously uninhabitable conditions.

Shellbug chitin is quite valuable, but makes virtually no appearance in the international market and trade as they are simply too difficult to both find and extract resources from. The external shell of the animal is capable of resisting both immense physical and magical harm. Instead, it must be pried off with a mining pick. The shellbug does not recover from the injuries inflicted in the process of harvesting however, and may simply die if the pick penetrates the underlying skin.

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Alchemy: Medicinal Candies - Scrib Rock

Scrib-imbued rock candy is an exceptionally healthy, bittersweet medicinal treat. It is used to cure mild poisoning, migraines and minor cases of blight disease. It is often carried by adventurers, pilgrims and healers for minor illnesses and prolong lifespan after severe blight infection when necessary potions are unavailable.

Begin by placing lumps of scrib jelly in a steel pot. Iron pots will leech into the solution and contaminate the final product. Fill half-way with water, and bring to boil. Simmer the jelly, stirring regularly for an hour until it is soft and melts off the spoon. If the jelly disappears entirely, you have used too much water.

Take a muslin cloth and pour the jelly into the centre. Tie it into a bag, and hang it over a clean wooden bowl. Keep the both the bag and bowl behind a locked door in a clean room without pests or mold.

After a week, the jelly will have seeped through the cloth, leaving a pure solution in the bowl. Squeeze the bag, then set aside. Take out your clean steel pan, and fill it half-way with water. Bring it to boil, either in a stove or over fire. Add the pure scrib jelly, and stir. The water should turn a dark pink.

Add four cups of pure sugar, in small spoons. The sugar must dissolve into the water entirely, without clumping at the bottom, cloudiness or grain. Bring back to boil if necessary, but do not burn the sugar on the sides or it will caramelize.

Finally, leave the sugar solution to cool. Your glass jars will explode if you pour hot liquids into them without preparation. Clean your jars and dry them, then slowly add the solution. Keep a clean cloth with a hole in the middle nearby, as any dust will immediately contaminate and ruin the mixture.

Place the cloth over the jar, followed by pushing your stick into the middle. Place the jar in a private area, preferably where it will not be knocked or spilled.

Wait three to four weeks for maximum production. When you feel that your rock has reached an appropriate size, remove the stick and carefully break the crystals off with a small, sharp knife.

Pack the tinted rocks in a tin or pouch, where they will remain usable for up to a year. After this time, its medicinal efficiency will degrade, along with its taste. Do not expose the candy to direct heat, water or bright sunlight.