Watching Bing-ge do mental gymnastics over why his alternate universe self would be sleeping with Shen Qingqiu is so funny to me no matter how I look at it.
You get to witness him talking himself into it in real time, going from, “look at him, that evil bitch, he's the worst person alive, so depraved, I have no compassion for such a heartless wretch," to, "well, I mean he’s never been ugly—but like how gross of AU me, like why would I jump into bed with—well, no okay I can see it. Yeah, okay I won’t lie, I definitely see the sex appeal. I’m just gonna…fake seduce him just to fuck with him a little bit. Yeah. That’ll show him. He’ll be so humiliated..." before immediately jumping to, "you know, I bet I could fuck him way better than AU me could.”
Like we don't even have evidence he's slept with a single dude before, but after like 12 hours with new Shizun he's already progressed to "so here's how I'll get my first male wife into the harem,"
#he's giving HIMSELF a “hear me out” argument like BUDDY ARE YOU HEARING YOURSELF
