11/15/2025
i think i'm happy
i love seeing the people around happy too

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@codyzhong
11/15/2025
i think i'm happy
i love seeing the people around happy too
i miss you, bosco
12/12/2024
my most toxic trait this year is getting super baked
thinking about my dead dog
and crying myself to sleep afterwards
cheers.
7/12/2024
this month july marks the passing my favourite boy bosco, i can't really get myself before to accept the fact that he is gone. i always said to myself he's just in vacation somewhere else. these days have been harder and harder to think like that. the longer it's been the more sad i get, he's never coming back. yeah sure the right thing to do is accept his death and move on, maybe get a new pet, get a cat perhaps, switch it up. no one will ever be bosco, he will always be bosco, my bosco. my honey 蜜糖 bao bao. bunzo man, the goodest sweetest boy. so many things at home remind me of you everyday. we still come home and greet you even though you're not here anymore. i wish i could snuggle with you for one more nap, one more roll over and play dead for some nice boiled chicken breast. one more time to play with you, bug you one more fucking time until you get pissed off at me, but still let me love you. i miss you so so so so much, uncle will always love you.
with what's going on with my health right now, getting depressed is so fucking easy, breaking down just thinking of you, looking at old photos. i wish we took my photos. everything kind of sucks right now, yeah there's good in my life too. i'm happy i have my family supporting me right now, i want to show me appreciation when i get better. i hope everyone that i'm dodging now will understand, i do know they understand but i can't do anything right now. everyday i think about when i will get better, when i can go back to work. i have too much stress, how can i not think about anything? i can't just let everything go. i care about things maybe i shouldn't care about, but i still do. i worry too much.
she sees it too, she asks me why i look scared or frightened sometimes. maybe i am scared, i feel like i don't wanna fuck anything up. everything is going well, except for me.
i know that will change, time will change everything
time will heal
it will always heal with time, but how long?
that's up to me, i need a stronger mind set, it's not the end of the world, but these times have probably been the roughest time of my life.
these past five months have been fucking dreadful, i wish this upon no one. never.
there is good in my life too right now,
family, friends, my bear.
thank you guys for making life bearable
i'll do my best in return the favour in the future
i need to somehow find interest in things again, video games don't do justice, youtube is fucking boring, can't even pay attention to a fucking 25 min anime. fucking brain rotting. i need to start listening to music again, everything feels much better after. i need to get myself to get up in the morning. do something, anything but to destroy my skin farther from healing.
the only good side is i lost thirty five fucking pounds, unfucking believable. keep it going cody
it's been a long ass time since i've had alcohol and some nice fried chicken. i can live without it though, it's going fine.
no cheating, no cheat meals, no good food that makes you feel bad afterwards. keep it going, you can be stronger
tell yourself, remind yourself be happy, be the person you dream to be.
love yourself, love everyone.
ok bye
7/29/2023
i will always love you
i’ll never forget you
12/6/2022
something about december
not a super festive guy but standing at work in the cold and just thinking it’s december already makes me kind of warm to the heart
kinda strange
everything seems alright
kinda stale but it’s better than before
the goal is to always feel better than before
cya
7/27/2022
it’s pretty hot today, really hot actually
The Platters - Smoke Get In Your Eyes
the heat reminds me of my mother playing oldies in the first gen x5
getting slurpee’s at the seven eleven
for some reason i remember the one particularly in surrey
3 years ago today i was also in washington with my friends
good times, simpler times
lots of good feelings and good memories today
i have nothing negative to write about
good bye
i just want them to be better
i want to believe i tried my best
i cannot do anything else
waking up every hour to check my phone to see if there is a call for help
seeing everyone else be on standby
seeing the tiredness of everyone
i wish you just knew everyone loves you
we always will
i always will
it’s so fucking difficult
i am running out of ideas
i feel my mind is deteriorating
everything is actually falling apart this time
the anger i hold against people who don’t understand and only treat it as a nine to five
go fuck yourselves
would you treat your family the same?
i’ve never seen someone so unsympathetic
on to the next one right? dickhead
when you're happy, i'm happy
not in a way that i don’t care about my own happiness
i’ve been so occupied with my life it’s crazy
i’m still the same mf since 2003
but things aren’t looking so bad
i don’t feel so bad
the career has started and i’m here until the end of time
LF> 3 bedroom townhouse
i’m ready to settle
no time to find
it’s okay
things will work out right?
i hope so
good night!
this morning was one of the hardest moments of my life
death is inevitable
i wish i could do anything to make her feel better
i'm so sorry
veridis quo
i was 11 when alive 2007 came out, there was no possible way i could have made it to montreal
when i was 13, people on the forums said to wait on september 9th, 2009
for the (revolution) of 20090(909)
2017 came, hopeful, hope lost
it’s unfortunate i couldn’t make this dream come true
i always thought about dancing wildly while they played within the pyramid
i would have paid my whole life savings to see them
but i’m still happy i have all these songs
all these happy memories embedded into each and everyone one of them
thanks
168.
checking in
nothing has changed
checking out
twenty five
sounds old
trying, then knowing
realizing what you don’t want
i don’t feel any guilt at all, i am relieved
on my own terms
congratulations CA!
i haven’t read through them all but i know each and every one of them mean so much to you. i am so happy on your first published book. heres to many more!
reading them got me wanting to write again
also sorry i’m an asshole for flaking and never scheduling to hang out
i have no excuse for my behavior
but would still love to, if it’s not too late
i’m afraid she likes the idea of me
and she’s pushing so hard but she barely knows anything about me
i feel like shes dissapointed i’m not meeting her expectations for who i am
who am i?