i sing the body electric

i am not an angry girl, but it seems like i've got everyone fooled. natalia mironov. 18. caution: contents hot

[coffeeandnat-blog]

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[coffeeandnat-blog]

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[narcssablacks]

RP Meme [2/8] OTPs ↳ Natalia Mironov/Gwendolyn Holm(OTP: Tangled)

"Blondie, if you wanna hold my hand all you gotta do is ask."

[narcssablacks]

RP Meme [1/7] Quotes ↳ "I’m fucking Natalia Mironov and you could be, too." - Natalia Mironov

[coffeeandnat-blog]

Because I have been reading all of the things and admittedly getting a little bit emotional.

I love you all, okay? Every single one of you. Don't feel bad. Don't blame yourselves. Things happen. We're a group of people who talk to each other on a daily basis, things like this? They're bound to happen. As much as you guys might think that this should be a comfortable RPing environment, it's difficult to do that with so many different personalities around. So remember that. Remember that not everyone is perfect. Remember that some people are sensitive and some people are abrasive and brash, much like the characters on sux. People are going to clash. But you should still love each other. And don't feel like you're at fault.

To Reid, I love you so much it's ridiculous. You are my baby chick and I am fiercely protective over you. And these characters that I developed with you will stick me for so damn long it's not even funny. Before I met you, I could never see myself openly trusting other people I didn't know to ship with and developing these characters with you has been such a fantastic experience. Tangled will always live on, okay? As cheesy as that might sound. 

To Angela, I remember thinking you were a great Rachael, and we never really talked and then we had that tiny chat and things just weren't the same again. You became one of my closest friends, another one of my baby chicks and it was difficult to look back and realize that we hadn't been friends for fucking ages, just a few days. I'm so so so glad I met you. I'm so glad we became friends and I love you and your crazy ass forever and always. OT4 5ever

To Michelle, you're not even here right now, you're on vacation and I see you tweeting but I'm putting you here because you're another one of my really close friends. Thank you for not thinking I was crazy. Thank you for shipping Jemy, thank you for giving me an awesome brotp in Joey and Kate, thank you for all the things. I love you. 4TPain, okay?

To Macie, Macie, Macie, Macie. I've always loved you. Back in the days of Peyton and Nat, when you played Lux, when you started giving me feels with Kennedy and Erin, you're another one of those I'm fiercely protective over and I'm so damn glad we became friends. Ily.

To Alice, I love you, girl. So much. I'm sad we didn't get to explore Bautumn and Bus more. It pains my heart, but you know damn well you're not getting rid of me that easily and we'll have tinychat where you'll fall asleep and sing us songs and be adorable, okay<3

To Ali, words can't express how awesome I think you are. You are smart and witty and sharp and you play your characters with such a genuine honesty and such fantastic humor that I envy you as a roleplayer. I promise this isn't the last you'll see of me and I hope you find the desire to stick around because this place wouldn't be the same without you.

To Elena, like I said, people are sensitive, some people take things a lot more personally than others(and hey guess what? i'm one of them too) It was never my intention to hurt your feelings, never my intention to be mean or rude, so I'm sorry it came out that way. I've always been honest about things on the dash and maybe that's a flaw of mine. Don't blame yourself. You're sweet and beautiful and an important addition to this RP. It's okay, it'll be okay.

To Mika, I used to think you didn't like me. Though I used to think a lot of people didn't like me. It wasn't that you came off as unwelcoming, so please don't think that, but I as a person have an unnatural desire to be validated and liked by people and sometimes reading things on the internet just make it hard to tell when someone likes you. You're a great RPer, and you gave me Cailey feels when I didn't want them. I'll miss you like crazy.

To Charlie, how are you even fourteen? You're such a fantastic writer that I can't even wrap it into words. You put in so much dedication into your characters that it's admirable, and I'll always love you and the time we had a bit of Pippa and Chester. You're great, honestly.

To Sara, I'm sorry. Know that I love you and that I'm always a Skype message away. It was always so nice to have someone my age around, we had a lot of fun RPing and talking and doing all of the things. We'll always have Thoroughly Modern Millie. 

To Melissa, girl, sometimes I wanted to reach through the dash because Kirby and Noah and miss "I don't ship them." You never made me feel unwelcome or anything like that, so don't think that at all. You've always been one of my favorite presences on the dash, and I'll always remember the little of time I played Parker and we had an awesome brotp.

To Amy, you were such a good sport. You really were. I enjoyed every minute of every single gif chat I had with you and you're a great roleplayer. From Vinny and Kate to Vinny and Bella and Dean being a douchebag to poor Duncan, it's all been great and I'll miss you and your characters so much. You're so young and already a crazy good RPer, you're going to be awesome.

To Gabi, you are actually one of the sweetest most genuine people I've ever met. I think you're one of the first few people who made me feel really really welcome here, and I will always love you for that. Caroline and Nat will always be one of my favorite friendships I've ever RPd and I won't ever forget.

To Ari, you're another one of those people who made me feel really really welcome early on. We didn't get to RP that much together recently but Gigi was and always will be Nat's best friend, her shoulder to lean on, her rock. I loved forming that friendship with you because it was so unlikely and so strange but so perfectly fitting and it was one of the first things that helped me develop Natalia as a caring and fiercely protective person. You're such a great, lovely and caring person and I love you.

To Helena, you used to intimidate the fuck out of me, you still do, tbh, but not in a bad way. I want to thank you for writing these characters. For never getting tired of me and my million auditions, for always giving me the chance to RP these wonderful characters that you brought to life, for carrying this RP on your back for so long with no one to help you. You're a great admin and I hope Sux lives on for a long ass time.

To anyone else, If I left you out it's not because I dislike you or I didn't want you to feel included, so please don't think that. I've made a lot of friends while I've been here and you're all important to me. Have fun here. Explore your characters, enjoy the relationships, develop and chat and plot and para and do all of the things.

Respond to starters that you usually wouldn't reply to. Get to know other people, get to know other characters and love each other. Because Sux truly is a family and nothing should change that.

I love you all, Aly.

[coffeeandnat-blog]

Wow. I never actually ever thought I would be writing this message. And it's weird to think about doing it now, but it needs to be done.

I'm going to give a warning here and say that this might get long and that I'm going to be very candid in this, because it's the way I've always tried to be and I don't think this should be any different.

Back last summer I was completely new to Tumblr RP and I remember finding Sux and finding Natalia's profile and falling in love and I wrote her audition and I got accepted in like three hours and I was nervous and anxious because I didn't know anyone and I was by myself and it was crazy intimidating(it still is.) That's when the slippery slope of characters started. There was Rachael and Kate and Robyn and Josh and fifty seven more and this place became a good place for me to come and talk to you guys and have a little family and a separate world of my own and it was nice when things got shitty because people were super supportive and nice even though I was old as hell and you all should have been side eyeing me.

And then there was Tangled and Kicky and Robyn and Wills and all these moments that were great, and people shipped my ships and that was so awesome I don't even know how to formulate it into words. 

But there were times were...seeing certain things made me feel unwanted by certain people. There were times where I felt like an annoyance or a nuisance and like this place would have been better off without me because all I was doing was clogging the dash with fifty million characters and my plots and chats were obnoxious and so on and so on. I almost left Sux several times during these moments because I felt like shit. But you guys are good at making people feel included and liked and important and then it was all okay.

For a long time.

This place is still great. I still love these characters. I still love you guys. But I don't feel like my presence is a good thing anymore. I've offended people several times in the past few weeks and have made them feel uncomfortable and that's not really something I ever intended to do. I've never intended to be a bitch or harsh or mean or anything like that, but sometimes actions can certainly come across that way and it sucks for both ends. I've always thought sux was a family. You know those crazy ass cousins that drive you crazy sometimes but you love so fiercely that anytime someone tries to talk to shit you just want to kick their asses? That's you guys.

And it makes me uncomfortable knowing that I've made people uncomfortable. It makes me uncomfortable knowing people are sitting there like man aly is a bitch. And it's probably better to remove myself from that situation so that other people feel better about RPing here.

It kills me way too much to let these characters go. I've poured my heart and soul into some of them, have thousands and thousands of posts on Kate and Nat. I've developed the shit out of them and if I could I would RP them forever, in a continuous cycle, Baby-Sitter's Club style. But that's probably not a good idea.

It's not a good idea for me to stay and I rather do this than make anyone else feel uncomfortable again. So to you guys, I say it's been such a lovely time. I love each and every one of you, even when it didn't feel like I did and I hope you all for the best.

My personal is here if you want to talk. And you can get my Skype from Reid or Angela or Sara or Traci if you want it. 

So long, and thanks for all the fish.

[coffeeandnat-blog]

[eugenefitzrider-deactivated2015]

You were my new dream.

[worldofhommes]

Visit Original Link

Maps // Yeah Yeah Yeahs

they don’t love you like I love you.

[gwen-holm]

But that was then and this is now. A lot of things have changed since then; you and I both you that. I can’t guarantee that we’ll never fight again, because I can’t predict the future, but I can promise you, that us not talking? That will never happen again. Ever. I don’t like fighting with you. I really don’t. There’s been enough fighting in my life and I don’t want it to be that way with you. Especially with you. Hell, even minor disagreements make me want to go buy you flowers and make you breakfast in bed and just apologize over and over again because fighting isn’t healthy. And yeah, we don’t fight, but who gives a fuck if that isn’t normal? If you haven’t noticed, we’re not normal. And I love that. I love you, Natalia.

I’m in love with you.

[coffeeandnat-blog]

I know. I know it is. I just--our conversation about that trip made me stupidly nervous, and I was bitchy and fucking selfish and it wasn't fair of me to do that to you, and I just felt like fucking shit because it felt like we were upset with each other. It felt like you were upset with me and jesus christ that's such a shit feeling. And then I fucking thought, shit we've been together for almost eight months and we've never fought what if we just fucking explode at each other. And then you got this look on your face a few minutes ago and I thought it was going to happen again.

I fucking love you, too, blondie. I probably say it to you all the time but it doesn't feel like enough. I'm fucking head over heels in love with you and fighting with you feels like the worst thing that can happen.

[seejadeblog]

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[gwen-holm]

Yes.

[coffeeandnat-blog]

I thought I'd lost my best fucking friend. And that I wasn't going to get her back. I was so fucking stupid back then so many times. And we didn't talk for like a fucking week. A week Gwen, that's not even that long period of a time but I felt like it was crazy fucking torture. I can't go through that again. We never fight do you notice that? And maybe that's fucking unhealthy or weird but I don't want to fight with you. I don't want to think that I've upset you in any way. I don't want to fucking do that with you because the one time we did it fucking crushed my heart.

[gwen-holm]

No.

[coffeeandnat-blog]

Do you remember our first fight?

[gwen-holm]

But I wasn’t. Nat, you haven’t pissed me off. Like, ever. Never.

[coffeeandnat-blog]

No?

[gwen-holm]

But you haven’t?

[coffeeandnat-blog]

It feels like it. You looked really annoyed there.

[gwen-holm]

…What?

[coffeeandnat-blog]

I feel like I've been pissing you off a lot lately. I don't want to get into another fight.

[gwen-holm]

No, I don’t; but that doesn’t mean I can’t like politics. I was raised around it, after all.

[coffeeandnat-blog]