*sips in british*

pathetic and not easthetic

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is it toooooo ominous to have a photo copy of my hand on my cupboard? 

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imagine having enough time and will power to do school stuff well 

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sorry if this shows all my dumb dog pics as well but my phone is too stupid to figure out how to send a 13 second long video to my laptop so I had to go the long way. anyways yes to all you 0 people reading this, I am a constantly bored person that demands a constant stream of entertaining entertainment on most days, otherwise I just kinda die. 

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here is my sister, my cis-gender sibling, my unfortunately second half, my womb-mate (someones probably said that before) and I made her sit while I put lights in her face so thanks I guess. ft a plant 

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plot twist

actually I cant be bothered to log out so I guess ill stay here or something idk

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oh, hello there

so I keep forgetting my accounts and then just making new ones with various emails and every time I log in im in a different one. but by process of elimination ive been able to identify the one I wish to inhabit, and unfortunately, this aint it. so uh bye? ill leave you with the knowledge that corpses sink and then float so you could be swimming and one would just like pop up

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mentally preparing for the purge tomorrow 

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went to Dartmouth the other day. 7/10 v British would recommend for a weekend trip

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first date (v gay)

so like id liked this gal for 3 years and we’re like best friends so it was an UPSETTING time to say the least but idk what happened we are both like huge homos and we were doing roleplaying as gf and she was like so wanna actually date and I like cried but 

on Halloween we had some fun and I know it was 11 days ago but I am still EXSTATIC so heres a little gay text I wrote afterwards to send to my friend 

SO like we came in and went straight to the lounge to watch IT, and I’m like under a blanket, and say “do you want a blanket?” And she says “ we could share a blanket?” AND WE DID OH MY GOD

and then we carved a pumpkin while bopping to some spooky beats

And then we had dinner which was a bit awkward and Mutti had got me some.... uh... thigh high socks? But these were KINKY like wow?? And so I tried them on and she was like lollll

And uh so we got into our costumes AND HOLY FUCK I ALMOST PASSED OUT I HAD TO PULL MY MASK DOWN THE HIDE MY BLUSH

so like yeah we went out and all the houses were like lol you’re to old for this so we went to the park and we were on the roundabout just lying down in the dark against each other while it span and then she went on the zip wire and then 

WOAH THEN 

She wanted to go the baby swings so we did AND SHE FELL AND I THOUGH SHE LIKE BROKE HER BACK 

But it was cool 

And then we went on the big swing and I lay like across it and she was lying across the other way and every time she made me laugh like my stomach clenched and cause she was lying on top of me she could feel it which made her laugh and I could feel it and yeah 

And then we went on the slide but we didn’t really, we just stood at the top with our faces really close together LIKE REALLY 

And uh then my dad was like come home cause we’d been there and hour 

But we still had an hour in my room :)

We went out into the roof and just kinda sat there looking at the sky until MY NEXT DOOR NEIGHBOR CAME OUT and we were like well fuck just be quite he won’t see us it’s cool so yeah we snuck back in and we somehow ended up rolling around on the floor (not in that way) in the dark with like only candles and fairy lights and then we were play fighting and I pretended to die so she pretended to try and save me by doing CPR but instead of like kissing me she just held my mouth open and blew in it which like killed us both cause I mean she blew in my mouth and then I won a round of play fighting and I had to do cpr and she was like “are you gonna blow in my mouth?” And I was like “well I can do it the normal way if you want” wink wonk and she was like I don’t mind so I didn’t cause I chickened out but yeah lots of Intimacy and almost kisses I guess. Oh and when I was taking her home my dad was like “ we walked past the park and heard gay kids screaming swear words “ and we were like uh oh we were the only ones there for like an hour Oh and when I got to her door her mum let me stroke her cat AND I CAN SAY 10/10 SOFTEST CAT EVER HOW WHAT WHY I DONT UNDERSTAND ID NEVER FELT SOMETHING SO FLUFFY??

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anyways yeah just wanted to put it on here just in case like my phone gets smashed or something annnndddd so yall (theres 0 of you) can see it if ya want

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Italy was kinda cool

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I don't know anything about what fish look like send help