brideshead

"Cold glass, how you insert yourself Between myself and myself. I scratch like a cat. The blood that runs is a dark fruit - An effect, a cosmetic. You smile. No, it is not fatal." -Sylvia Plath (follow isleofhollowbirds for bandom trash)

[cold-glass]

Things i did when 16: .Went to prom .got my gcse results .got told ‘i love you’ .got told ‘you saved my life . Had a boyfriend in a ldr .started sixthform .gained a chill friendship group .met my best friend .had a house party .got drunk .went on dates .wrote a short story .saw two bands that i love .went to conferance .went to pride .took my as levels

Things i want to do at 17: .get my as results .write a reading list and read all the books on it .go to a music festival .have a boyfriend/girlfriend .get a uni offer .decide where i want to go to uni .make art .fall in love .kiss someone i love .learn to drive .write an epq .take my a levels .be happy, at least for some of the time

[cold-glass]

I found this on a sideblog, and I did a lot of things I wanted to, I did amazingly on my as results, got back into reading, went to a music fest, I did have,,, two girlfriends but they both didn't last very  long and weren't serious, got not one but 4 offers from unis, and decided which one to go to! Not made as much art as ive wanted but I have been doing it thought the year, ive not fallen fully in love but, ive also reconsidered the way I think of love and friendship and I did tell someone I had strong feelings for about them and im pound of myself for that. I fell in love with a lot of my friends but in a nice way, not in a horrific unrequited love way, I'm learning to drive, if feeling a little shaky on it, I wrote a brilliant epq on art history and aesthetics which was really interesting and I loved having the opportunity to do independent research. I took my a levels. I have no comment on how well the exams went but I got though it all! I'm really proud of myself. and, most importantly, I was happy- for most of the time. This, despite all the stress, the uni rejection, the slight existential terror of growing up, has been one of the best years of my life. I think the highlight was the trip to London and Paris with my friends, it made every part of me happy.

I suppose I should say something about my goals for 18. I want to get my a levels, move out of home and go to uni, I want to make hundreds of new loose friends and a handful of good close ones, I want to love my course, I want to do well (even though first year doesn't count), I want to cook for myself and others,,  a lot of the time, to join societies, keep up my dancing and maybe pick up some more hobbies, I don't know, there are going to be so many new opportunities this year, all ive got to do is take it as it comes. I just want to keep on loving myself and loving life and living honestly in the way I want to

and, to be honest, you guys on here have been  part of my life this year, so thanks to all of you!

[cold-glass]

Hey im not going to be active on this blog anymore! Follow my main @isleofhollowbirds

[vodka-acid]

[bekanicolex]

[dinvilliers]

We walked along the ledge above a waterfall Current tugged at our ankles Green grass tendrals snaked around our feet

The air was filled with the stench of someone elses weed And smoke from the barbeque And the words that tumbled from your mouth Im not sure which one of those choked me

The water sung such sweet tunes for me A softer song than you And the fact that you cant keep food down anymore. Or the fact that i dont love you anymore. And i should be pleased that i dont have to go though the pain of unrequited love but really i just miss the person i made you out to be

Oh my dearest naiads Take me into your arms pull me in To your honeyed depths But dont break the reflection of trees on your surface

They whisper, surely you cant be as naieve as to believe you mean nothing at all to these people.

[nickkahler]

1. Art requires time — there’s a reason it’s called a studio practice. Contrary to popular belief, moving to Bushwick, Brooklyn, this summer does not make you an artist. If in order to do this you have to share a space with five roommates and wait on tables, you will probably not make much art. What worked for me was spending five years building a body of work in a city where it was cheapest for me to live, and that allowed me the precious time and space I needed after grad school. 2. Learn to write well and get into the habit of systematically applying for every grant you can find. If you don’t get it, keep applying. I lived from grant money for four years when I first graduated. 3. Nobody reads artist’s statements. Learn to tell an interesting story about your work that people can relate to on a personal level. 4. Not every project will survive. Purge regularly, destroying is intimately connected to creating. This will save you time. 5. Edit privately. As much as I believe in stumbling, I also think nobody else needs to watch you do it. 6. When people say your work is good do two things. First, don’t believe them. Second, ask them, “Why”? If they can convince you of why they think your work is good, accept the compliment. If they can’t convince you (and most people can’t) dismiss it as superficial and recognize that most bad consensus is made by people simply repeating that they “like” something. 7. Don’t ever feel like you have to give anything up in order to be an artist. I had babies and made art and traveled and still have a million things I’d like to do. 8. You don’t need a lot of friends or curators or patrons or a huge following, just a few that really believe in you. 9. Remind yourself to be gracious to everyone, whether they can help you or not. It will draw people to you over and over again and help build trust in professional relationships. 10. And lastly, when other things in life get tough, when you’re going through family troubles, when you’re heartbroken, when you’re frustrated with money problems, focus on your work. It has saved me through every single difficult thing I have ever had to do, like a scaffolding that goes far beyond any traditional notions of a career.

Teresita Fernandez, “Commencement Address at VCU,” 2013 (via nickkahler)

[babylittlebunny]

[condecorado]

[earthwormie]

i’m almost always out of it i can’t remember how to speak without a drumbeat keeping time without a choir singing rhyme i’m halfway between “okay” and “want to die” you’re the only one i ever trusted my favourite diary entry and you’re not even mine i know the way you hold a pen but you don’t know the half of it i shake because the pills don’t work and because you make me feel i might be worth a secret but you haven’t seen these scars and you don’t know the half of it don’t pick up the phone when i call you late at night i’m high off painkillers and sharpie fumes i don’t think much when i almost lose myself you’ve never seen me so far gone i hope you’ll never know he made me worse than i’ll ever tell i don’t know how to fix this on my own

it was easier to lie when i could breathe properly (via westcoastwentz)

[cold-glass]

Things i did when 16: .Went to prom .got my gcse results .got told ‘i love you’ .got told ‘you saved my life . Had a boyfriend in a ldr .started sixthform .gained a chill friendship group .met my best friend .had a house party .got drunk .went on dates .wrote a short story .saw two bands that i love .went to conferance .went to pride .took my as levels Things i want to do at 17: .get my as results .write a reading list and read all the books on it .go to a music festival .have a boyfriend/girlfriend .get a uni offer .decide where i want to go to uni .make art .fall in love .kiss someone i love .learn to drive .write an epq .take my a levels .be happy, at least for some of the time

[did-you-know]

NASA created retro travel posters for different locations in our solar system in hopes of inspiring young people to imagine a future where common space travel is a possibility. 

Source

[colormebowie-deactivated2017091]

these are really important to me

[deathtml]

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

How to Cope with Unrequited Love

1. Try to face, and come to terms with, the fact that he or she doesn’t love you the way you love them. Unless you are able to reach this place, you won’t be able to move on with your life.

2. If possible, try to understand the reasons why. For example, perhaps they don’t want a relationship with anyone at the moment; perhaps they are in love with someone else …

3. Try to remain positive and optimistic about love. Don’t allow this experience to make you bitter and cynical. Instead, turn your attention to finding someone who will love you for “you”, and who will treat you well.

4. Make a concerted effort to get your mind off of him or her. Throw yourself into your hobbies; work hard at school or college; surround yourself with friends whose company you enjoy.

5. Stay busy. Don’t sit around waiting for him or her to call, or agonising over the pain you are feeling. Don’t feed the monster!

6. Remind yourself of all your strengths and positive attributes. Remind yourself of all the people who love and value you, and who want to hang out, and spend time, with you. Make a list of all the good things others have said about you. Work on being secure in yourself as an individual (as you don’t need a relationship to be a worthwhile person.)

7. Remind yourself that breakups and unrequited love are fairly common experiences. It doesn’t mean there is anything wrong with you - or that you’ll never find true love.

8. Although it may feel fake at first, go on dates with other people. You may actually enjoy yourself – and perhaps you’ll find someone else to fall in love with.

9. If this has happened before, think of what you did to cope with that pain previously. Try doing the same things again. Remind yourself that grief and pain lessens, and life goes on.

10. Ask yourself why you want to be in a relationship with someone who didn’t love you the way you love them. You deserve more than that – and there’s a good chance that you can have more than that. Is it a pattern from your childhood? Perhaps you were abandoned or unloved by a parent? If appropriate, look into getting professional help.

[enginkid88modern]

[class-struggle-anarchism]

Museums have approximately the same hours of business as churches, the same sanctimonious odors and silences, and a snobbish presumption in direct spiritual opposition to the vital men [sic] whose works are closeted there. What have those silent corridors to do with Rembrandt and the “no smoking” signs to do with Van Gogh?

Alexander Trocchi (via class-struggle-anarchism)

[soraangel]

[glitterviolence]

☁

[nevver]

What we’re reading, Johan Deckmann