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essex hemphill, cordon negro

I drink champagne early in the morning instead of leaving my house with an M16 and nowhere to go. I’m dying twice as fast as any other American between eighteen and thirty-five This disturbs me, but I try not to show it in public. Each morning I open my eyes is a miracle. The blessing of opening them is temporary on any given day I could be taken out. I could go off. I could forget to be careful. Even my brothers, hunted, hunt me. I am the only one who values my life and sometimes I don’t give a damn. My love life can kill me. I’m faced daily with choosing violence or a demeanor that saves every other life but my own. I won’t cross-over. It’s time someone else came to me not to patronize me physically, sexually or humorously. I’m sick of being an endangered species, sick of being a goddamn statistic. So what are my choices? I could leave with no intention of coming home tonight I could go crazy downtown and raise hell on a rooftop with my rifle. I could live for a brief moment on the six o'clock news, or I can masquerade another day through the corridors of commerce and American dreams. I’m dying twice as fast as any other American. So I pour myself a glass of champagne, I cut it with a drop of orange juice. After I swallow my liquid valium. my private celebration for being alive this morning, I leave my shelter. I guard my life with no apologies. My concerns are small and personal.

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By Raymond Pettibon

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Resort / Alternative Editorial by COMPLEX CASTLES

Samantha White @ Wilhelmina NY

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