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@compulsiveconfessions
hello! welcome to compulsive confessions :) this is a safe space for compulsive/defensive liars to vent, connect, and find support. there are not many places online or irl that make us feel like we have any chance of recovery, so i wanted to make a small space for that here.
pathological liars are welcome here as well, but because i have no experience with that this blog will be geared more towards compulsive/defensive liars.
about the mod below
Does anyone have any stories of recovery or improvement?
I am trapped in a web of lies and i feel like theres no way out.
please interact
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im a writer, creating stories every hour of everyday like my sanity depends on it. it's what ive always done, half to cope, half to entertain myself. unfortunately this meshes a little too smoothly with the compulsion to lie. because im great at creating stories and making them belieable and i understand that nobody expects to be lied to about personal or past details so why would anyone check if i had a sister or not. if i had an ex that was abusive in my old hometown. nobody is fact checking these things, that'd be incredibly rude, so my goddamn lying brain just runs with it and makes a story and before i know it the words are coming out my mouth and solidifying in the worldview of the people around me. my coworkers think i have a dead sister. i dont even have an sister, never mind one that died, except that i guess i do now because how the fuck do you even explain that, oh yeah, sorry, i made her up on the spot because i heard something that tickled my brain funny and now i kinda just have to accept that this is my reality. god i hope none of my coworkers ever meet someone from my hometown. the dead giveaway. fucking hell i wish i could stop thinking and talking and fuckng saying these things. ughh
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I dont even know what to do anymore. I cant stop lying and I dont even realize when im doing it, in every single conversation, I say things that aren't true and I only realize afterwards
I dont know how to deal with it. I want so badly to stop but its like an addiction and its killing me. I just want to exist truthfully. But i dont even know how anymore.
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saw a post here with prompts for liars/secret identities and tell me why these two hit me so hard
"He's been lying so long the truth feels foreign in his mouth. He practices it alone at night like a language he's trying to relearn." and
"˙She told one small lie at seventeen. Built a life on it. The life is genuinely good. The lie is still there at the foundation. She checks it every morning like a crack in the wall."
like. i'm so used to character design ideas to be so foreign to me that this one caught me off guard. it felt like a punch in the face almost
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My lying drives me crazy. Literally I had a rough childhood it wasnt easy.
But I lie about my values, morals, mental condtions, childhood trauma sexual abuse ive went through and events of my life that are so fucked up to the point I start to believe its real and the people around me believe its real. Its disgusting and yet I keep doing it. And I cant stop. If someones like me out there that lies about such dark horrific important things its not little lies like "oh im not feeling good today" when I really am. Its like the urge to tell someone my mother died or I was raped when nether one of those happened. Its grim asf. Its fucked as hell. But its the truth. I hope this can be posted here because I searched the internet for people like me a place where we can go to genuinely say we dont want to be like this and you arent alone if you are like this.
If you cant post this I do understand.
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not sure if this is anything but i'm starting to think that the fact that i can remember my lies much MUCH better than what actually happens irl is probably a major contributor to my compulsions. like, again, the compulsion was probably going to be there anyway but surely my selective memory is not helping me limit the lies i tell either
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been itching and itching to lie even though i am trying so hard not to and the other day a lie slipped because i was stressed that someone brought up a truth i had been trying so hard to ignore and pretend no one knew and it's big and fuckkkkk i will die in this hill but what a fuckass hill
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im not sure if im a compulsive liar but i have a really big lie that ive been telling for years and keep adding onto and its something that all of my friends will hate me for and i feel so trapped and alone.
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anyone else struggling with the Build Up Lie (wherein i spend literal days, sometimes even weeks, with a lie in the back of my throat that i just havent had the chance to blurt into a conversation and also i'm trying desperately to Not Say It because i dont actually want to lie but the compulsion is very much there and the lie keeps getting more elaborated because i am a Great Liar but it exists only in my head because i keep not saying it so its never actually a real lie but it's there and-) or it just me...?
(Side note: is there like. an actual term for it? Cause i've just been calling it the Build Up Lie or when im in a joking mood Daydreaming's Evil Twin)
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I keep lying to friends and family about having done this school project, I haven't and I suppose it helps me to lie? But also like i do actually want to be able to admit to at least my friends that "No, i haven't gotten round to doing that". Also I just so often lie about the mundane to my friends, I kinda hate it, my friends all are really honest people so I feel very out of place each time I catch myself lying. okay that's all thank you <3
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Feeling the itch to lie about something, anything, and it's driving me up a wall again. Add the fact that sometimes my lies pile up enough to cause me actual delusions? I'd really like my brain to work correctly, kthx
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it’s hilarious when you see anti-pathological posts like “pathological liars have horrible memory” and your like “dude I have a mental spreadsheet and it is the most organized thing in my life”
(commentary ok)
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half of my childhood is fake and i cant even tell what half
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“I don’t know why I lie. It’s not like I do it on purpose.”
“Wdym you don’t know?? Of course you have a reason, you must be lying about that. Promise you won’t lie.”
“I literally can’t do that??”
“Well you have to”
“Ok *lies about not lying I guess??*”
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Told someone I was a compulsive liar and now they constantly ask if I’m lying whenever I say anything. Wonderful
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idk how to stop lying. I’ve lied about my whole identity, where I’m from, languages I speak, talents, morals, places I’ve been to & people I’ve known, etc. all fabricated. I’ve finally met new people and I’m trying not to mess everything up with lies. while I do lie about a lot of stuff, there is also genuine horrific stuff that’s happened to me too, and if people find out I’m a liar they wont believe the stuff that’s actually true. I need to stop lying!!
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