Something concerns me that is STILL be prevalent in the rp community:
Pressuring your partner to reply to rps and asks repeatedly, and without end.
It’s one thing to poke your partner once a week, but if you are making them DREAD their blog to where they disappear for days to avoid confrontation, you are making your own hell. Reminding them all day long, or even multiple times a week, is BAD FORM.
The only exception: Your partner as explicitly stated openly: “Please remind me today again,” or “Please poke me until I do it.” or “I need to be told at least X times before I can focus.”
However, If you’re using guilt trips, Passive-Agressive/ Aggressive tactics, to remind them, that still counts as harassment (IE:)
“Well I guess my thread isn’t good enough.”
“I know, my muse/thread/au is boring, huh? :/ “
“I just thought you keep forgetting about me, you seem to answer X a lot.”
“Why do you answer everyone but me?”
“Oh. I’m sorry I bothered you….” *waits a moment, then comes back* “So are you going to do our thread or not???”
You insta-publish your reply when they finally answer, and then immediately poke them to answer it as fast as you, because you want to keep going, ignoring their needs.
You bombard them with messages over and over with no end.
You BEG.
You threaten them in any way.
You vague about “being bored” or how you’re “waiting for replies.”
These are just SOME examples of pressuring someone. If someone isn’t replying to your thread or muse, they could have a LOT going on! Maybe their muse doesn’t work right now for your muse, maybe they are stressed, doing multiple tasks, maybe they feel 1-3 threads hardcore right now, and it’s nothing personal. Muses like who they like. If someone has multiple muses, chances are one muse is being “louder” somewhere else over the one you play with.
See, if you PUSH someone too hard they will lose ALL motivation for you to begin with, and thus never want to rp with you. You may have even demotivated them from rp entirely; something they love to do. I know everyone says: “But I’d want someone to tell me they are bothered by me” No, you don’t. Anytime anyone has done this, it was met with drama. So most people would rather shrink away and avoid confrontation. And if you are being AGGRESSIVE asking for interaction all the time, you’ve shown them that you are agressive all over, and may retaliate. Own your behavior!!!
We all get excited about threads, ships, verses, other muses, etc. But everyone’s mood is not always in alignment with yours, that’s why we have multiple partners and try to get other verses going. If you have multiple partners, and are getting the same reaction out of all your partners (IE: avoidance) maybe you need to look at the common denominator: you.
You need to step away, take a breather, count, whatever it takes to calm down, and think to yourself: “Is this how I would want to be treated? Would I like someone pressuring and bullying me, making me uncomfortable??”
And if you are on the receiving end of all this? Time to WARN them about your boundaries. If they don’t correct their behavior, MOVE ON and drop them as a partner. If necessary, (by degree of nastiness or threat) BLOCK THEM.
