Crackhead Once-ler

I'm a silly guy who makes thneeds & crack out of truffla trees. Sparkle on, don't do crack, and stay dynamite my guys!

[deal-ler-onceler]

Vans are better than Converse…

Wrong. - Deal

[crackhead-once-ler]

Nah my gnarly rad snickerdoodle-doodle-dudes, your Vans and Converse may be totally tubular dope, but they're no match for my Shrocs. - Crack-ler :3

[deal-ler-onceler]

What the fuck are those.

-Deal

[crackhead-once-ler]

Just the absolute pinnacle of snazzy rad cracktastic fashion, my pookie boo! They're Shrek Crocs, better known as SHROCS!!! AREN'T THEY AS LIT AS FLAMING HOT CHEETOS, MY GUY??!!

Shrek + Crocs = SHROCS!!! It's basic boy math my dynamite guy!

*gasp* *whispering* you do know who Shrek is, right?

[deal-ler-onceler]

Vans are better than Converse…

Wrong. - Deal

[crackhead-once-ler]

Nah my gnarly rad snickerdoodle-doodle-dudes, your Vans and Converse may be totally tubular dope, but they're no match for my Shrocs. - Crack-ler :3

[crackhead-once-ler]

WILL SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP A DUDE OUT AND HELP ME DOMESTICATE A RACCOON?????????

[crackhead-once-ler]

Aww DANG my best GUYS!! I've been so frickle-frackle flipping busy keeping up with the thneed beezwax and tie-dying my clothes that I FORGOT about this gnarly rad blog I made!! How have my homeslice homesicle homies been????

[jackharknessflirtsxx]

Come gimme some of that yum like a lollipop :3

You can come lick my lollipop anytime. 😏😘🍭🍆

[crackhead-once-ler]

[jackharknessflirtsxx]

Hey! Can I ask you a question? Do you wanna have a slumber party in my basement?

Sounds like a fun time. Count me in. 😘😏

[crackhead-once-ler]

Sounds totally cracktastic my pookie boo boi!!! I'll bring my adorbs sleeping bag and dvd collection for wicked rad movie night!!

Want me to bring some super-scrumptious crack-elicious snacky-snacks too my Jackchacho? (btw, don't think we'll both fit in that sleeping bag...)

[crackhead-once-ler]

So *you're* the one stealin' my drugs without payin'. It ain't that hard to just...hand over some cash for whatever ya want. I don't bite, I swear. (Although you look like you might...) I don't charge much for my stuff. 3.98. That's it. But with the tab you've seemed to have racked up from stealin' my shit, that would be....200 for everything you've taken.

- Deal-ler

OH HEYYYY THERE BROCHACHO!! What's crackalackin, my guy? DANGGG, holy hot flaming cheetos, somebody's been stealy-stealin' your sparkly-silly-snow?!?!!!! How despicable!!! Not gnarly-rad-bestie behaviour at all!!! It for sureies wasn't me, I make my own cracktastic DIY silly-snow!!! I pinky promise it wasn't me!! However maybe we could go on a wild-wacky, epic quest together to catch the crack thief!!! What do ya think, homesicle?

And $3.98??? DANG DAWG, THAT'S A WICKED RAD DEAL, MY POOKIE!! I'LL BUY $200 WORTH RIGHT NOW!!!!!

Also unless this is you, I defs don't bite, obvs!

[deal-ler-onceler]

...I'm like 99% sure it was you. I mean come on, you literally call yourself a fuckin' crackhead. Also, I'm not a taco. Also also, do *not* call me "pookie".

- Deal

[crackhead-once-ler]

That's because I totes my goats AM a funky-rad crackhead, my cool-dip gnarly guy!! Not because I sneaky-stealy-stealied your dopeass glitter my rad manchacho!!! I swear on my best gorls Lana and Tay-Tay, that it was no-way-José me who stole your wacky cracktastic snow, my dude pal!! That completely goes against bestie-brochacho code my guy, like what the frickle-frackle??? What kind of crapgoblin, level-zero bestie would do such a thing!?!?? Not me, wicked homeslice!! And like I said, DIY!!

Oh good, cus if I was talking to a taco I think I would have officially gone batshit coo-coo bananas and gotten a lil too silly!! And aw dang son, no "pookie"? How about "brochacho"? Every swag peep is my brochacho, my guy!!

~ Crack-ler!!!

P.S, I wasn't haha-silly jokin' about that $200 worth of snow, I'll even up it to $400 for dat totally tubular deal, my guy!!! Sparkle on!!!!

[deal-ler-onceler]

...I'd say you're already batshit. Also, tone it down would ya? I'm hungover and you're way too loud. 400 for crack? Okay fine, we got a deal.

P.S., who the *fuck* is "Tay-Tay"?????? Am I supposed to know who that is? Ted might know, I'll have to ask him then...

- Deal

[crackhead-once-ler]

Dang dawg, you're probably correcto as cheeseballs, my radiant rad man, I AM indeed batshit as razzle-dazzle. And sorry about the hangover dudesicle homie, hey I have a song for hangovers, it goes like LA LA LA LALALA!!! LA LA LA LALALA!!!

AND YOU DON'T KNOW TAY-TAY??! T-SWIZZLE??? T SWIFT?? HOLY HOT FLAMING NACHOS MY GUY, WHAT MUSIC DO YOU EVEN LISTEN TO, HOMESLICE??? And who's Ted? Is he gnarly rad too?

P.S, sorry for being crazy kazoo loud again, brochacho boi, not gonna lie, I'm hella wired right now. Can't contain the silliness.

[deal-ler-onceler]

Would you stop yelling?! What did I literally *just* say like five minutes ago. It's not like my head wasn't already pounding or nothin'...and I only listen to *good* music. You know, My Chemical Romance? Panic At The Disco? Falling in Reverse?? Black Veil Brides even? Any of that ringin' a bell? Wouldn't be surprised if you don't know em...just means I get to turn you onto some damn good music.

- Deal

[crackhead-once-ler]

*whispering* Sorry broseph, I got too wacky wild, I'll whisper for now, boo boo!!! GASP!! Tay Tay is SO good, she's mah beloved girly-cakes-muchacha-pookie-boo!!! People just think it's "haha-silly" and "rad cool" to hate on her!!

Buuuut I am always totes as turtles down to discover some sick and gnarly new tunes, my man!! Most of those don't really ring any tacobells, but DANG DAWG, I love Panic! at the Disco/my boi Brendo!! Or Beebo as I call him!! Nawww Beebo, my funky guy!!! I love him and his silly-sassy-swag-boots"!!! I wanna pair toooo!!!

And I totes my goats, ken out of ken, am the double-bubble disco queen!!! (but I'm heckin' not headed to the guillotine, just to the club, my guy! Wanna come with???)

Would you tell me more about your gnarly bands, my bro dude boo?

[deal-ler-onceler]

Hmm...you don't really look like any of my shit would be in your taste. Course not, what am I saying? You probably hate metal. You're probably one of those people that picks on emo kids like me just for the fuck of it. But since you asked, I guess I could...tell you a little...I'm not a gatekeeper....I guess....where do you wanna start?

- Deal

[crackhead-once-ler]

Heh heh, no offenco my epic bro-bro boi-chacho, but we just met!! Ya don't know my rad funky style and taste yet, I'm full of wacky gnarly surprises, my friendo!! In fact, I think metal is metal as flaming hot nachos!!!

And "picks on emo kids"???? Daaannngggg, you've REALLY, TOTES MY GOATS misread me, my radical, marvellous man!!! I may not be an emo myself, but I totes my toads and turtles vibe with everybody as long as they're kind to other rad peeps and ain't some poopface-meanie-bigot or abuser! Everybody kind is totally dope and my brochacho, my guy!! I've gotta lotta love to go around, homesicle!! We're all besties!! I don't pick beef!

What's "My Chemical Romance" like? The name sounds totally lit and dope and slay and yas!!!

[deal-ler-onceler]

MCR, good pick. First off, the members: Gerard Way, lead singer. Mikey Way, bassist. Gerard and Mikey are brothers and whatever you do, do NOT look up "waycest". Trust me. Just don't. Frank Iero, rhythm guitarist and one of the very first fans of the band back in the early days. And Ray Toro, the cool as HELL lead guitarist and, personally, my favorite member and the reason I play guitar. Now, I started on 2010's Danger Days (such an underrated album...) back when it came out so personally I'd recommend starting there, then going backwards, The Black Parade, Revenge, and ending on their first album Bullets. There's also a 9/11 to MCR to something pipeline that I do not understand.

- Deal

[crackhead-once-ler]

Hey hey hey my gnarly rad man, sorry for going ✨POOF ✨!! and disappearing for 1 million billion years!!! I went to go make a marshmallow and pixy stix salad and got distracted by some really crazy bird action goin down outside and I never returned. Sounds totally totes my goats dope as cheeseballs my guy pal!! Imma listen to all that wicked rad magic music!!! And I pinkie promise and swear on my best gorl Lana that I WILL NOT google... that.

[crackhead-once-ler]

So *you're* the one stealin' my drugs without payin'. It ain't that hard to just...hand over some cash for whatever ya want. I don't bite, I swear. (Although you look like you might...) I don't charge much for my stuff. 3.98. That's it. But with the tab you've seemed to have racked up from stealin' my shit, that would be....200 for everything you've taken.

- Deal-ler

OH HEYYYY THERE BROCHACHO!! What's crackalackin, my guy? DANGGG, holy hot flaming cheetos, somebody's been stealy-stealin' your sparkly-silly-snow?!?!!!! How despicable!!! Not gnarly-rad-bestie behaviour at all!!! It for sureies wasn't me, I make my own cracktastic DIY silly-snow!!! I pinky promise it wasn't me!! However maybe we could go on a wild-wacky, epic quest together to catch the crack thief!!! What do ya think, homesicle?

And $3.98??? DANG DAWG, THAT'S A WICKED RAD DEAL, MY POOKIE!! I'LL BUY $200 WORTH RIGHT NOW!!!!!

Also unless this is you, I defs don't bite, obvs!

[deal-ler-onceler]

...I'm like 99% sure it was you. I mean come on, you literally call yourself a fuckin' crackhead. Also, I'm not a taco. Also also, do *not* call me "pookie".

- Deal

[crackhead-once-ler]

That's because I totes my goats AM a funky-rad crackhead, my cool-dip gnarly guy!! Not because I sneaky-stealy-stealied your dopeass glitter my rad manchacho!!! I swear on my best gorls Lana and Tay-Tay, that it was no-way-José me who stole your wacky cracktastic snow, my dude pal!! That completely goes against bestie-brochacho code my guy, like what the frickle-frackle??? What kind of crapgoblin, level-zero bestie would do such a thing!?!?? Not me, wicked homeslice!! And like I said, DIY!!

Oh good, cus if I was talking to a taco I think I would have officially gone batshit coo-coo bananas and gotten a lil too silly!! And aw dang son, no "pookie"? How about "brochacho"? Every swag peep is my brochacho, my guy!!

~ Crack-ler!!!

P.S, I wasn't haha-silly jokin' about that $200 worth of snow, I'll even up it to $400 for dat totally tubular deal, my guy!!! Sparkle on!!!!

[deal-ler-onceler]

...I'd say you're already batshit. Also, tone it down would ya? I'm hungover and you're way too loud. 400 for crack? Okay fine, we got a deal.

P.S., who the *fuck* is "Tay-Tay"?????? Am I supposed to know who that is? Ted might know, I'll have to ask him then...

- Deal

[crackhead-once-ler]

Dang dawg, you're probably correcto as cheeseballs, my radiant rad man, I AM indeed batshit as razzle-dazzle. And sorry about the hangover dudesicle homie, hey I have a song for hangovers, it goes like LA LA LA LALALA!!! LA LA LA LALALA!!!

AND YOU DON'T KNOW TAY-TAY??! T-SWIZZLE??? T SWIFT?? HOLY HOT FLAMING NACHOS MY GUY, WHAT MUSIC DO YOU EVEN LISTEN TO, HOMESLICE??? And who's Ted? Is he gnarly rad too?

P.S, sorry for being crazy kazoo loud again, brochacho boi, not gonna lie, I'm hella wired right now. Can't contain the silliness.

[deal-ler-onceler]

Would you stop yelling?! What did I literally *just* say like five minutes ago. It's not like my head wasn't already pounding or nothin'...and I only listen to *good* music. You know, My Chemical Romance? Panic At The Disco? Falling in Reverse?? Black Veil Brides even? Any of that ringin' a bell? Wouldn't be surprised if you don't know em...just means I get to turn you onto some damn good music.

- Deal

[crackhead-once-ler]

*whispering* Sorry broseph, I got too wacky wild, I'll whisper for now, boo boo!!! GASP!! Tay Tay is SO good, she's mah beloved girly-cakes-muchacha-pookie-boo!!! People just think it's "haha-silly" and "rad cool" to hate on her!!

Buuuut I am always totes as turtles down to discover some sick and gnarly new tunes, my man!! Most of those don't really ring any tacobells, but DANG DAWG, I love Panic! at the Disco/my boi Brendo!! Or Beebo as I call him!! Nawww Beebo, my funky guy!!! I love him and his silly-sassy-swag-boots"!!! I wanna pair toooo!!!

And I totes my goats, ken out of ken, am the double-bubble disco queen!!! (but I'm heckin' not headed to the guillotine, just to the club, my guy! Wanna come with???)

Would you tell me more about your gnarly bands, my bro dude boo?

[deal-ler-onceler]

Hmm...you don't really look like any of my shit would be in your taste. Course not, what am I saying? You probably hate metal. You're probably one of those people that picks on emo kids like me just for the fuck of it. But since you asked, I guess I could...tell you a little...I'm not a gatekeeper....I guess....where do you wanna start?

- Deal

[crackhead-once-ler]

Heh heh, no offenco my epic bro-bro boi-chacho, but we just met!! Ya don't know my rad funky style and taste yet, I'm full of wacky gnarly surprises, my friendo!! In fact, I think metal is metal as flaming hot nachos!!!

And "picks on emo kids"???? Daaannngggg, you've REALLY, TOTES MY GOATS misread me, my radical, marvellous man!!! I may not be an emo myself, but I totes my toads and turtles vibe with everybody as long as they're kind to other rad peeps and ain't some poopface-meanie-bigot or abuser! Everybody kind is totally dope and my brochacho, my guy!! I've gotta lotta love to go around, homesicle!! We're all besties!! I don't pick beef!

What's "My Chemical Romance" like? The name sounds totally lit and dope and slay and yas!!!

[crackhead-once-ler]

Wassuuup bbg!

The camp has finally been set up!! Our little headquarters is pretty cozy, especially with those fluffy trees overhead! T҉h҉e҉ ҉E҉n҉t҉i҉t҉y҉ is being a little fickle, giving me some form of silent treatment 😒 but new location changes can make him grumpy, so it's whatever! He always comes around!

I noticed you were a little sad though :( Chin up, my guy! I'm sure your pookie boo values you for the king you are! Even if he does have a husband...? Either way, those sweet tunes can help with the blues, so keep on listening! ✨✨✨

Didn't know there were multiple Once-lers though.....that sounds pretty cool if they're all as rad and rockin' as you are! 😆

Stay absolutely fantabulous, and feel free to stop by our camp anytime,

Lilia

P.S. Love the use of "dynamite gal!"

Yo yo yo my rad bestie gorl!! Pumped as cheeseballs to hear from you again babygorl!!

Oh my holy Tacobell!!! IM SO STICKIN HAPPY FOR YOU MY DYNAMITE GAL!! Rock on my radiant queen!! I bet your camp looks absolutely wicked and that it’s cozy as heck!! I’m sorry The Entity is being a grumpy-pants dingus! I’m sure he’ll lighten up real soon!

AWWWW LILIA THANK YOU!! My pookie boo does defs value my wacky rad energy! It’s my fault for getting romantically attached to him (and his husband) more than I should have. Whoopsieeesss ¯_(ツ)_/¯ And of course my guy!! My gorl Lana is always there for me!

And heck yes my dude friend!! There’s a whole wild, radical cosmic Once-ler multiverse!! There are cheesetons of us wacky little twinks! It’s totes my goats coolio my brochacho!!

THANK YOU SO MUCH CUTIE!! You stay totally tubular, totally rockin, and absolutely bombastic yourself my gorl!! I’ll ABSOLUTELY VISIT YOUR WICKED COOL CAMP!! THANK YOU FOR INVITING ME MY GUY!!

[lady-liliyity]

TYYYY MY KINGGG!!!

He came around so we're all good! :)

And hey, no problem with falling in love, bbg! It's a crazy magical thing that works in wild ways! No need to feel at fault for your fluttery feelings!!

CHEESETONS of wacky twinks?? Maybe that's what T҉h҉e҉ ҉E҉n҉t҉i҉t҉y҉ meant by variation!! Huh....maybe I'll meet some of them some day! I'm sure it'll be an experience!

Love ya king, keep being your super awesome self,

Lilia

[crackhead-once-ler]

WHATS UP MY DYNAMITE RAD MUCHACHA!! Oh dang, so glad that wild guy came around! What a silly pants!

Thank you so so stinkin much my babygorl Lilia, you’re totally tubular and as wicked sweet as cheeseballs!! <333

Yeah my babygorl!!! CHEESETONS!!! Maybe you will!! It will totes my goats be a wild experience!!!

Lova ya too pookie boo bear!!! Stay dynamite and rock on my gnarly rad bro-gorl!!

[crackhead-once-ler]

Damn I want what ur on gng😭🙏

*GASP!!!* Bunniii Bun Bun, NOOOO!! You do NOT want the sparkly silly-snow, my adorbs pookie-boo-bear!! It's heckin wacky-wicked bad for your health, my guy!!! My crack may be razzle-dazzle-cracktastic, but if you do it your brain will for sureies turn into a sizzling, gnarly egg!! And that is why it's for me and my kooky egghead only!! (I don't even do the glitter as often as people think, I've just got that wicked rad, crackhead energy at all times cus I'm gnarly-coo-coo bananas and fricken insane in the membrane!) However I am totes my goats down for sharing other things! Like tacos? I WILL TOTALLY SHARE MY TACOS WITH YOU MY BESTIE BROCHACHO!!! Or my best gorl Lana's records or my Hello Kitty car!! I have cheesetons of totally tubular stuff to share, JUST NOT MY CRACK!!!

Sparkle on, DON'T do crack, and stay dynamite my guy!!!! Much love homie boo!!

[bunnixbunbun]

Okay that works too… I’ll gladly share tacos with u

[crackhead-once-ler]

Yaayyyy!! Sounds dope-alicious and radtastic my pookie Bun Bun!!

[crackhead-once-ler]

So *you're* the one stealin' my drugs without payin'. It ain't that hard to just...hand over some cash for whatever ya want. I don't bite, I swear. (Although you look like you might...) I don't charge much for my stuff. 3.98. That's it. But with the tab you've seemed to have racked up from stealin' my shit, that would be....200 for everything you've taken.

- Deal-ler

OH HEYYYY THERE BROCHACHO!! What's crackalackin, my guy? DANGGG, holy hot flaming cheetos, somebody's been stealy-stealin' your sparkly-silly-snow?!?!!!! How despicable!!! Not gnarly-rad-bestie behaviour at all!!! It for sureies wasn't me, I make my own cracktastic DIY silly-snow!!! I pinky promise it wasn't me!! However maybe we could go on a wild-wacky, epic quest together to catch the crack thief!!! What do ya think, homesicle?

And $3.98??? DANG DAWG, THAT'S A WICKED RAD DEAL, MY POOKIE!! I'LL BUY $200 WORTH RIGHT NOW!!!!!

Also unless this is you, I defs don't bite, obvs!

[deal-ler-onceler]

...I'm like 99% sure it was you. I mean come on, you literally call yourself a fuckin' crackhead. Also, I'm not a taco. Also also, do *not* call me "pookie".

- Deal

[crackhead-once-ler]

That's because I totes my goats AM a funky-rad crackhead, my cool-dip gnarly guy!! Not because I sneaky-stealy-stealied your dopeass glitter my rad manchacho!!! I swear on my best gorls Lana and Tay-Tay, that it was no-way-José me who stole your wacky cracktastic snow, my dude pal!! That completely goes against bestie-brochacho code my guy, like what the frickle-frackle??? What kind of crapgoblin, level-zero bestie would do such a thing!?!?? Not me, wicked homeslice!! And like I said, DIY!!

Oh good, cus if I was talking to a taco I think I would have officially gone batshit coo-coo bananas and gotten a lil too silly!! And aw dang son, no "pookie"? How about "brochacho"? Every swag peep is my brochacho, my guy!!

~ Crack-ler!!!

P.S, I wasn't haha-silly jokin' about that $200 worth of snow, I'll even up it to $400 for dat totally tubular deal, my guy!!! Sparkle on!!!!

[deal-ler-onceler]

...I'd say you're already batshit. Also, tone it down would ya? I'm hungover and you're way too loud. 400 for crack? Okay fine, we got a deal.

P.S., who the *fuck* is "Tay-Tay"?????? Am I supposed to know who that is? Ted might know, I'll have to ask him then...

- Deal

[crackhead-once-ler]

Dang dawg, you're probably correcto as cheeseballs, my radiant rad man, I AM indeed batshit as razzle-dazzle. And sorry about the hangover dudesicle homie, hey I have a song for hangovers, it goes like LA LA LA LALALA!!! LA LA LA LALALA!!!

AND YOU DON'T KNOW TAY-TAY??! T-SWIZZLE??? T SWIFT?? HOLY HOT FLAMING NACHOS MY GUY, WHAT MUSIC DO YOU EVEN LISTEN TO, HOMESLICE??? And who's Ted? Is he gnarly rad too?

P.S, sorry for being crazy kazoo loud again, brochacho boi, not gonna lie, I'm hella wired right now. Can't contain the silliness.

[deal-ler-onceler]

Would you stop yelling?! What did I literally *just* say like five minutes ago. It's not like my head wasn't already pounding or nothin'...and I only listen to *good* music. You know, My Chemical Romance? Panic At The Disco? Falling in Reverse?? Black Veil Brides even? Any of that ringin' a bell? Wouldn't be surprised if you don't know em...just means I get to turn you onto some damn good music.

- Deal

[crackhead-once-ler]

*whispering* Sorry broseph, I got too wacky wild, I'll whisper for now, boo boo!!! GASP!! Tay Tay is SO good, she's mah beloved girly-cakes-muchacha-pookie-boo!!! People just think it's "haha-silly" and "rad cool" to hate on her!!

Buuuut I am always totes as turtles down to discover some sick and gnarly new tunes, my man!! Most of those don't really ring any tacobells, but DANG DAWG, I love Panic! at the Disco/my boi Brendo!! Or Beebo as I call him!! Nawww Beebo, my funky guy!!! I love him and his silly-sassy-swag-boots"!!! I wanna pair toooo!!!

And I totes my goats, ken out of ken, am the double-bubble disco queen!!! (but I'm heckin' not headed to the guillotine, just to the club, my guy! Wanna come with???)

Would you tell me more about your gnarly bands, my bro dude boo?

[crackhead-once-ler]

So *you're* the one stealin' my drugs without payin'. It ain't that hard to just...hand over some cash for whatever ya want. I don't bite, I swear. (Although you look like you might...) I don't charge much for my stuff. 3.98. That's it. But with the tab you've seemed to have racked up from stealin' my shit, that would be....200 for everything you've taken.

- Deal-ler

OH HEYYYY THERE BROCHACHO!! What's crackalackin, my guy? DANGGG, holy hot flaming cheetos, somebody's been stealy-stealin' your sparkly-silly-snow?!?!!!! How despicable!!! Not gnarly-rad-bestie behaviour at all!!! It for sureies wasn't me, I make my own cracktastic DIY silly-snow!!! I pinky promise it wasn't me!! However maybe we could go on a wild-wacky, epic quest together to catch the crack thief!!! What do ya think, homesicle?

And $3.98??? DANG DAWG, THAT'S A WICKED RAD DEAL, MY POOKIE!! I'LL BUY $200 WORTH RIGHT NOW!!!!!

Also unless this is you, I defs don't bite, obvs!

[deal-ler-onceler]

...I'm like 99% sure it was you. I mean come on, you literally call yourself a fuckin' crackhead. Also, I'm not a taco. Also also, do *not* call me "pookie".

- Deal

[crackhead-once-ler]

That's because I totes my goats AM a funky-rad crackhead, my cool-dip gnarly guy!! Not because I sneaky-stealy-stealied your dopeass glitter my rad manchacho!!! I swear on my best gorls Lana and Tay-Tay, that it was no-way-José me who stole your wacky cracktastic snow, my dude pal!! That completely goes against bestie-brochacho code my guy, like what the frickle-frackle??? What kind of crapgoblin, level-zero bestie would do such a thing!?!?? Not me, wicked homeslice!! And like I said, DIY!!

Oh good, cus if I was talking to a taco I think I would have officially gone batshit coo-coo bananas and gotten a lil too silly!! And aw dang son, no "pookie"? How about "brochacho"? Every swag peep is my brochacho, my guy!!

~ Crack-ler!!!

P.S, I wasn't haha-silly jokin' about that $200 worth of snow, I'll even up it to $400 for dat totally tubular deal, my guy!!! Sparkle on!!!!

[deal-ler-onceler]

...I'd say you're already batshit. Also, tone it down would ya? I'm hungover and you're way too loud. 400 for crack? Okay fine, we got a deal.

P.S., who the *fuck* is "Tay-Tay"?????? Am I supposed to know who that is? Ted might know, I'll have to ask him then...

- Deal

[crackhead-once-ler]

Dang dawg, you're probably correcto as cheeseballs, my radiant rad man, I AM indeed batshit as razzle-dazzle. And sorry about the hangover dudesicle homie, hey I have a song for hangovers, it goes like LA LA LA LALALA!!! LA LA LA LALALA!!!

AND YOU DON'T KNOW TAY-TAY??! T-SWIZZLE??? T SWIFT?? HOLY HOT FLAMING NACHOS MY GUY, WHAT MUSIC DO YOU EVEN LISTEN TO, HOMESLICE??? And who's Ted? Is he gnarly rad too?

P.S, sorry for being crazy kazoo loud again, brochacho boi, not gonna lie, I'm hella wired right now. Can't contain the silliness.

[crackhead-once-ler]

So *you're* the one stealin' my drugs without payin'. It ain't that hard to just...hand over some cash for whatever ya want. I don't bite, I swear. (Although you look like you might...) I don't charge much for my stuff. 3.98. That's it. But with the tab you've seemed to have racked up from stealin' my shit, that would be....200 for everything you've taken.

- Deal-ler

OH HEYYYY THERE BROCHACHO!! What's crackalackin, my guy? DANGGG, holy hot flaming cheetos, somebody's been stealy-stealin' your sparkly-silly-snow?!?!!!! How despicable!!! Not gnarly-rad-bestie behaviour at all!!! It for sureies wasn't me, I make my own cracktastic DIY silly-snow!!! I pinky promise it wasn't me!! However maybe we could go on a wild-wacky, epic quest together to catch the crack thief!!! What do ya think, homesicle?

And $3.98??? DANG DAWG, THAT'S A WICKED RAD DEAL, MY POOKIE!! I'LL BUY $200 WORTH RIGHT NOW!!!!!

Also unless this is you, I defs don't bite, obvs!

[deal-ler-onceler]

...I'm like 99% sure it was you. I mean come on, you literally call yourself a fuckin' crackhead. Also, I'm not a taco. Also also, do *not* call me "pookie".

- Deal

[crackhead-once-ler]

That's because I totes my goats AM a funky-rad crackhead, my cool-dip gnarly guy!! Not because I sneaky-stealy-stealied your dopeass glitter my rad manchacho!!! I swear on my best gorls Lana and Tay-Tay, that it was no-way-José me who stole your wacky cracktastic snow, my dude pal!! That completely goes against bestie-brochacho code my guy, like what the frickle-frackle??? What kind of crapgoblin, level-zero bestie would do such a thing!?!?? Not me, wicked homeslice!! And like I said, DIY!!

Oh good, cus if I was talking to a taco I think I would have officially gone batshit coo-coo bananas and gotten a lil too silly!! And aw dang son, no "pookie"? How about "brochacho"? Every swag peep is my brochacho, my guy!!

~ Crack-ler!!!

P.S, I wasn't haha-silly jokin' about that $200 worth of snow, I'll even up it to $400 for dat totally tubular deal, my guy!!! Sparkle on!!!!

[crackhead-once-ler]

Damn I want what ur on gng😭🙏

*GASP!!!* Bunniii Bun Bun, NOOOO!! You do NOT want the sparkly silly-snow, my adorbs pookie-boo-bear!! It's heckin wacky-wicked bad for your health, my guy!!! My crack may be razzle-dazzle-cracktastic, but if you do it your brain will for sureies turn into a sizzling, gnarly egg!! And that is why it's for me and my kooky egghead only!! (I don't even do the glitter as often as people think, I've just got that wicked rad, crackhead energy at all times cus I'm gnarly-coo-coo bananas and fricken insane in the membrane!) However I am totes my goats down for sharing other things! Like tacos? I WILL TOTALLY SHARE MY TACOS WITH YOU MY BESTIE BROCHACHO!!! Or my best gorl Lana's records or my Hello Kitty car!! I have cheesetons of totally tubular stuff to share, JUST NOT MY CRACK!!!

Sparkle on, DON'T do crack, and stay dynamite my guy!!!! Much love homie boo!!

[crackhead-once-ler]

So *you're* the one stealin' my drugs without payin'. It ain't that hard to just...hand over some cash for whatever ya want. I don't bite, I swear. (Although you look like you might...) I don't charge much for my stuff. 3.98. That's it. But with the tab you've seemed to have racked up from stealin' my shit, that would be....200 for everything you've taken.

- Deal-ler

OH HEYYYY THERE BROCHACHO!! What's crackalackin, my guy? DANGGG, holy hot flaming cheetos, somebody's been stealy-stealin' your sparkly-silly-snow?!?!!!! How despicable!!! Not gnarly-rad-bestie behaviour at all!!! It for sureies wasn't me, I make my own cracktastic DIY silly-snow!!! I pinky promise it wasn't me!! However maybe we could go on a wild-wacky, epic quest together to catch the crack thief!!! What do ya think, homesicle?

And $3.98??? DANG DAWG, THAT'S A WICKED RAD DEAL, MY POOKIE!! I'LL BUY $200 WORTH RIGHT NOW!!!!!

Also unless this is you, I defs don't bite, obvs!

[crackhead-once-ler]

How've you been? 😏😘

YOOOOOOOOOO, JACKCHACHO MY GNARLY GUY!!! I HAVEN'T HEARD FROM YOU IN A WICKED LONG TIME, LIKE A WHOLE JEREMY BEARIMY, MY GUY!!!! IT IS SO CRACKTASTIC TO HEAR FROM YOU MY MAIN MAN!!!

I've been totally curly wurly fucking awesome, my dope dude guy!!! Totes my goats cracktastic!! Totally pumped!!! Just the other day I alphabetized all my tasty-tastic rad M&Ms!!!! And then when I was done I crushed and smashed all of them up and snorted them up with my favourite silly straw!!!!

After that I was so fucking gnarly pumped up I decided to hop hop into my totally tubular Hello Kitty car and go to the beach beach where a cracktastic squirrel tried to communicate secrets of the universe with me!!! I swear I share a soul with this funky little crackhead!! I could see it in his beady squirrelchacho eyes as he stole my tater tot!!!! It was gnarly wicked!!! totally sick!!! cucumber cool my dude guy!!!

HOW HAVE YOU BEEN MY FAVOURITE HORNDOG BROCHACHO MAN DUDE?! :DDD

[jackharknessflirtsxx]

Uh-huh... I don't know what else I would expect from you honestly.

I'm doing pretty well, thanks. I've mostly just been chilling - going to bars, flirting, taking people home. You know, the usual.

I see you still have that drug problem. Well, if you're ever interested in trying to break your habit, I know something even better than drugs. 😏🤭😉

[crackhead-once-ler]

Nawwww Jackchacho my dynamite girly!! That's just about what I figured you'd be up to you, my horny pookie boo brochacho!!! My heart soars with the eagles nest to hear you've been doing gouda these days!!!!!

NAAAHH, I'm totes my goats, ken out of ken fine my baby man!! Are you suggesting I MAKE YOUR LOVE MY DRUG???

[jackharknessflirtsxx]

Yeah, that's pretty much what I was suggesting. 😘

[crackhead-once-ler]

OMG DID YOU PULL A KESHA ON ME, JACKY BOO?? OH JACK, BABYGORL, LIGHT OF MY LIFE POOKIE BEAR, YOU'RE SUCH A SILLY LITTLE FLIRT!!!! I'M FLATTERED AS CHEESEBALLS MY RAD HORNY PANTS BRO!!! WANNA GO ON A CRACKTASTIC DATE WITH ME AGAIN???!!!!

[jackharknessflirtsxx]

I'd love to! As long as we come back to my place after. 😉❤️‍🔥

[crackhead-once-ler]

SOUNDS GNARLY SWAG AS CHEESEBALLS MY BABYGORL JACKCHACHO MAN!!! Wanna skedaddle over to the club before we go to your place? I HEAR IT'S DISCO NIGHT, MY GUY!!

[crackhead-once-ler]

How've you been? 😏😘

YOOOOOOOOOO, JACKCHACHO MY GNARLY GUY!!! I HAVEN'T HEARD FROM YOU IN A WICKED LONG TIME, LIKE A WHOLE JEREMY BEARIMY, MY GUY!!!! IT IS SO CRACKTASTIC TO HEAR FROM YOU MY MAIN MAN!!!

I've been totally curly wurly fucking awesome, my dope dude guy!!! Totes my goats cracktastic!! Totally pumped!!! Just the other day I alphabetized all my tasty-tastic rad M&Ms!!!! And then when I was done I crushed and smashed all of them up and snorted them up with my favourite silly straw!!!!

After that I was so fucking gnarly pumped up I decided to hop hop into my totally tubular Hello Kitty car and go to the beach beach where a cracktastic squirrel tried to communicate secrets of the universe with me!!! I swear I share a soul with this funky little crackhead!! I could see it in his beady squirrelchacho eyes as he stole my tater tot!!!! It was gnarly wicked!!! totally sick!!! cucumber cool my dude guy!!!

HOW HAVE YOU BEEN MY FAVOURITE HORNDOG BROCHACHO MAN DUDE?! :DDD

[jackharknessflirtsxx]

Uh-huh... I don't know what else I would expect from you honestly.

I'm doing pretty well, thanks. I've mostly just been chilling - going to bars, flirting, taking people home. You know, the usual.

I see you still have that drug problem. Well, if you're ever interested in trying to break your habit, I know something even better than drugs. 😏🤭😉

[crackhead-once-ler]

Nawwww Jackchacho my dynamite girly!! That's just about what I figured you'd be up to you, my horny pookie boo brochacho!!! My heart soars with the eagles nest to hear you've been doing gouda these days!!!!!

NAAAHH, I'm totes my goats, ken out of ken fine my baby man!! Are you suggesting I MAKE YOUR LOVE MY DRUG???

[jackharknessflirtsxx]

Yeah, that's pretty much what I was suggesting. 😘

[crackhead-once-ler]

OMG DID YOU PULL A KESHA ON ME, JACKY BOO?? OH JACK, BABYGORL, LIGHT OF MY LIFE POOKIE BEAR, YOU'RE SUCH A SILLY LITTLE FLIRT!!!! I'M FLATTERED AS CHEESEBALLS MY RAD HORNY PANTS BRO!!! WANNA GO ON A CRACKTASTIC DATE WITH ME AGAIN???!!!!